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Anonymous #1

Former Manipulator
    #26379515 - 12/13/19 03:34 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

I used to lie. Like a lot. I used to play every single person I met like puppets and could get anything I wanted out of them.

I cannot explain enough how good I was at this. And annoyingly there is no example I can present that will show this power. So just believe it to be so.

Around 7 years ago I woke up to myself and made a conscious decision to stop lying. It is literally destroying me being this person that I am now. I am socially awkward. I am constantly thinking "I shouldnt have done that at the party last night" or "I shouldnt have said that in that way to my boss".



At what point does doing the right thing stop outweighing being yourself? I am meant to be a liar. I am meant to trick everyone and fuck people over. I am good at it and I do it naturally.


Going insane over here. I cant tell you how many times I have said something like "I could easily have made you do it" and the person just looks at me like I couldnt have. Fuck you. I could have made you fucking do it and it would have taken 0 effort. I am USING effort to give you the CHOICE to do what you want and you should fucking THANK ME.


(lol @ psychotic ending there)


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Anonymous #2

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #26379536 - 12/13/19 03:43 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

I knew a guy like that.  He was a piece of shit that I am very very glad is dead.  He probably overdosed like the bitch he truly was and forever will be.

He ruined peoples lives and caused nothing but damage.  But people probably still miss him and think they love his memory.

I suspect you are what is called a psychopath.  Psychopaths are usually very liked, very good at manipulating people.

Usually by means of dangerous drugs.  People love the people that give them drugs.


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Anonymous #3

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #2] * 1
    #26379565 - 12/13/19 03:55 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #2 said:
I suspect you are what is called a psychopath.



If there's any truth to OP then I suspect you are right. Definitely some mania and delusions of grandeur thrown in the mix too. Damaged individual, whichever way you slice it.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #3]
    #26379619 - 12/13/19 04:13 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #3 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #2 said:
I suspect you are what is called a psychopath.



If there's any truth to OP then I suspect you are right. Definitely some mania and delusions of grandeur thrown in the mix too. Damaged individual, whichever way you slice it.




Well to more fully evaluate me I think it is important to note that I follow an ayn rand style of life philosophy in that... i think modesty is deception.

One should say exactly the level they think they are so they can be shot down if they overstep. And in that fall they can learn and rise again ever further.


I have of course looked into the psychopath and bipolar categories to try and label myself. I do feel for others. I feel bad if they feel bad and what not.

My main wonder is to what degree do I feel for others and to what degree do others feel for others? Theres no way to determine if I feel less and its frustrating.





But beyond all this..... The main question I am asking.... At what point does doing the right thing stop outweighing being yourself? I have FULLY committed to the "right" way of living and I am in a constant state of turmoil from it.

Anon 2 infers that I am a dick yet I have sacrificed my sanity to try and be a good person. I think thats pretty fucked up of you. Can you imagine being someone youre not for 7 years because society says so?


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Anonymous #2

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #26379632 - 12/13/19 04:18 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

I don't think you are committed.  It sounds like pure evil.

A normal person has a conscious and it sounds like you've got into touch with yours.  You are lying to yourself as much as or more than others.  Others simply believe the lies you tell yourself.

Do you do a lot of very hard illegal drugs?  You'll probably overdose soon if you do.  Because if you believe lies, you won't be a safe as possible drug user.

You'll think you can do more drugs than you can.  That or someone will murder you.  Best case scenario you go to prison.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #26379663 - 12/13/19 04:27 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #2 said:
I don't think you are committed.  It sounds like pure evil.

A normal person has a conscious and it sounds like you've got into touch with yours.  You are lying to yourself as much as or more than others.  Others simply believe the lies you tell yourself.

Do you do a lot of very hard illegal drugs?  You'll probably overdose soon if you do.  Because if you believe lies, you won't be a safe as possible drug user.

You'll think you can do more drugs than you can.  That or someone will murder you.  Best case scenario you go to prison.





What do you mean you dont think I'm committed lol? I'm 7 years in.

Explain what you mean when you say "You are lying to yourself as much as or more than others.  Others simply believe the lies you tell yourself." Do you mean others believe the lies they tell themselves?


I am a glutton. I do everything in extreme excess. I've recently lost a lot of weight and feel great (fuck yeah). I have not stepped from the psychedelic to the addictive route because I am fully aware that if I ever do I wont come back. Heroin crack and meth will 100 percent kill my ass. I can tell you without ever having done these drugs FOR SURE if I did them for a week I would do them until my untimely death.

I quit weed when I had this revelation that I need to stop lying. So I just do psychedelics once a year.


This drug guess of yours is inaccurate only because I managed to have the foresight (for once lol).


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Anonymous #2

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #26379670 - 12/13/19 04:29 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Well no not really.  You just admitted that if you did hard drugs, you'd ride them to the grave.

Maybe you are off meds?


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Anonymous #3

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #26379687 - 12/13/19 04:33 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
At what point does doing the right thing stop outweighing being yourself?



If 'doing the right thing' and 'being yourself' are so much at loggerheads with each other then you need to seek professional help to find out why you're so damaged, before the cognitive dissonance drives you any further off the edge than you already are.

If 'being yourself' is treating others in a shitty way, then you are damaged, and badly.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #26379691 - 12/13/19 04:34 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #2 said:
Well no not really.  You just admitted that if you did hard drugs, you'd ride them to the grave.

Maybe you are off meds?




Naw not off meds nor on meds.


I think you have to take the first post just as truth and not exaggeration. Just see it as an annoyed and frustrated person toiling to do the right thing.

I reckon I'm more probably.... learned behavior made me the manipulator... and now I'm learning to be something else? And I just prefer the manipulation.


It really bothers me that people like me when I lie and never guess that I lie.... but when I tell the truth I'm more likely to be hated and also get told that I lie. Its fucking paradoxical.


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Anonymous #2

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #26379695 - 12/13/19 04:35 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

People know you are a shit bag and just do not risk a confrontation.

If you are bi-polar and not on meds, you are off meds.  Perhaps you're not manipulating us then after-all.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #3]
    #26379696 - 12/13/19 04:36 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #3 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
At what point does doing the right thing stop outweighing being yourself?



If 'doing the right thing' and 'being yourself' are so much at loggerheads with each other then you need to seek professional help to find out why you're so damaged, before the cognitive dissonance drives you any further off the edge than you already are.

If 'being yourself' is treating others in a shitty way, then you are damaged, and badly.




How can we objectively say that stepping on a childs face to reach the apple is a damaged human?

Wouldnt objectively bad be stepping on a childs face just because?



(and of course objectively bad cant exist but indulge me for these conversational purposes)


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Anonymous #3

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #26379700 - 12/13/19 04:37 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
It really bothers me that people like me when I lie and never guess that I lie....



I've met people like you before. I'm sure you manage to take in many but you'll never take in all. Some people will see straight through you. They'll humour you of course but at the back of their minds they'll be making a mental note to never trust you.

If you think otherwise, see my first post in this thread.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #26379703 - 12/13/19 04:38 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #2 said:
People know you are a shit bag and just do not risk a confrontation.

If you are bi-polar and not on meds, you are off meds.  Perhaps you're not manipulating us then after-all.





This thing bugs me to no end. Me simply bringing up that I used to be a manipulator makes people think that I am currently manipulating them.

I am being as open and honest as I physically can be right now. I have no ulterior motive whatsoever.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #3]
    #26379719 - 12/13/19 04:45 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #3 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
It really bothers me that people like me when I lie and never guess that I lie....



I've met people like you before. I'm sure you manage to take in many but you'll never take in all. Some people will see straight through you. They'll humour you of course but at the back of their minds they'll be making a mental note to never trust you.

If you think otherwise, see my first post in this thread.





This is surface level. Of course some people are defensive stance but defensive stance people are manipulated too. I would compensate for people who think I am tricking them and double bluff them basically.

(its funny how you cant explain how good at you were at something without sounding arrogant and short-sighted)


Now that I havent done it in 7 years the only residual skill is seeing these manipulators and calling them out. I've only made 2 admit that they're faking emotions in my life. Both times they only did it when their targets left the room and it was just us. Its horrifying watching someone go from crying saying they want to kill themself to a wicked smile.


This girl was one of these people I made admit it. She was considering killing herself and crying hysterically and her husband left the house. When it was just us I said "I dont care if you kill yourself. You dont fool me for a second and you never have." and her crying totally stopped she looked over at me and grinned then said "I know you know" and left the room.


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Anonymous #2

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #26379726 - 12/13/19 04:47 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #3 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
It really bothers me that people like me when I lie and never guess that I lie....



I've met people like you before. I'm sure you manage to take in many but you'll never take in all. Some people will see straight through you. They'll humour you of course but at the back of their minds they'll be making a mental note to never trust you.

If you think otherwise, see my first post in this thread.





This is surface level. Of course some people are defensive stance but defensive stance people are manipulated too. I would compensate for people who think I am tricking them and double bluff them basically.

(its funny how you cant explain how good at you were at something without sounding arrogant and short-sighted)


Now that I havent done it in 7 years the only residual skill is seeing these manipulators and calling them out. I've only made 2 admit that they're faking emotions in my life. Both times they only did it when their targets left the room and it was just us. Its horrifying watching someone go from crying saying they want to kill themself to a wicked smile.


This girl was one of these people I made admit it. She was considering killing herself and crying hysterically and her husband left the house. When it was just us I said "I dont care if you kill yourself. You dont fool me for a second and you never have." and her crying totally stopped she looked over at me and grinned then said "I know you know" and left the room.





Probably because it is wicked and short sighted.


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Anonymous #2

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #2] * 1
    #26379728 - 12/13/19 04:47 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Can fool some of them some of the time.  Cannot fool them all all the time.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #26379744 - 12/13/19 04:51 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #2 said:
Can fool some of them some of the time.  Cannot fool them all all the time.




Of course but the goal isnt perfection?

Lack of perfection does nothing here except give you a pretty little line to say.



If progress is made in broad strokes with failures here and there then its doing its job. Hell even if no progress is made and a risk was taken to achieve progress then its doing its job.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #26379753 - 12/13/19 04:55 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Well we keep coming back to this topic so I'll just ask you plainly:


Do you think modesty is manipulation? And why do you view modesty as less bad than bragging? And what benefit does modesty have for society and what benefit does bragging have for society?

Ayn Rand was hated by almost everyone. But that shit is accurate as all hell. If you claim to be the best at something.... and someone comes by and beats you at it... the shame youll feel will make you get better at that thing so you can beat them the next time around.


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Anonymous #3

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #26379756 - 12/13/19 04:56 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
Now that I havent done it in 7 years the only residual skill is seeing these manipulators and calling them out.



So you can see them but others can't see you?

Right.......................


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Anonymous #1

Re: Former Manipulator [Re: Anonymous #3]
    #26379981 - 12/13/19 06:42 PM (4 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #3 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
Now that I havent done it in 7 years the only residual skill is seeing these manipulators and calling them out.



So you can see them but others can't see you?

Right.......................




No I can see SOME of them and others SOMETIMES cant see them.


I do not have a magic ability to see every single lie ever told ever. Thats called a strawman argument.


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