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Anonymous #1
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Former Manipulator
#26379515 - 12/13/19 03:34 PM (4 years, 1 month ago) |
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I used to lie. Like a lot. I used to play every single person I met like puppets and could get anything I wanted out of them.
I cannot explain enough how good I was at this. And annoyingly there is no example I can present that will show this power. So just believe it to be so.
Around 7 years ago I woke up to myself and made a conscious decision to stop lying. It is literally destroying me being this person that I am now. I am socially awkward. I am constantly thinking "I shouldnt have done that at the party last night" or "I shouldnt have said that in that way to my boss".
At what point does doing the right thing stop outweighing being yourself? I am meant to be a liar. I am meant to trick everyone and fuck people over. I am good at it and I do it naturally.
Going insane over here. I cant tell you how many times I have said something like "I could easily have made you do it" and the person just looks at me like I couldnt have. Fuck you. I could have made you fucking do it and it would have taken 0 effort. I am USING effort to give you the CHOICE to do what you want and you should fucking THANK ME.
(lol @ psychotic ending there)
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Anonymous #2
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I knew a guy like that. He was a piece of shit that I am very very glad is dead. He probably overdosed like the bitch he truly was and forever will be.
He ruined peoples lives and caused nothing but damage. But people probably still miss him and think they love his memory.
I suspect you are what is called a psychopath. Psychopaths are usually very liked, very good at manipulating people.
Usually by means of dangerous drugs. People love the people that give them drugs.
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Anonymous #3
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Anonymous #2 said: I suspect you are what is called a psychopath.
If there's any truth to OP then I suspect you are right. Definitely some mania and delusions of grandeur thrown in the mix too. Damaged individual, whichever way you slice it.
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #3 said:
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Anonymous #2 said: I suspect you are what is called a psychopath.
If there's any truth to OP then I suspect you are right. Definitely some mania and delusions of grandeur thrown in the mix too. Damaged individual, whichever way you slice it.
Well to more fully evaluate me I think it is important to note that I follow an ayn rand style of life philosophy in that... i think modesty is deception.
One should say exactly the level they think they are so they can be shot down if they overstep. And in that fall they can learn and rise again ever further.
I have of course looked into the psychopath and bipolar categories to try and label myself. I do feel for others. I feel bad if they feel bad and what not.
My main wonder is to what degree do I feel for others and to what degree do others feel for others? Theres no way to determine if I feel less and its frustrating.
But beyond all this..... The main question I am asking.... At what point does doing the right thing stop outweighing being yourself? I have FULLY committed to the "right" way of living and I am in a constant state of turmoil from it.
Anon 2 infers that I am a dick yet I have sacrificed my sanity to try and be a good person. I think thats pretty fucked up of you. Can you imagine being someone youre not for 7 years because society says so?
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Anonymous #2
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I don't think you are committed. It sounds like pure evil.
A normal person has a conscious and it sounds like you've got into touch with yours. You are lying to yourself as much as or more than others. Others simply believe the lies you tell yourself.
Do you do a lot of very hard illegal drugs? You'll probably overdose soon if you do. Because if you believe lies, you won't be a safe as possible drug user.
You'll think you can do more drugs than you can. That or someone will murder you. Best case scenario you go to prison.
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #2 said: I don't think you are committed. It sounds like pure evil.
A normal person has a conscious and it sounds like you've got into touch with yours. You are lying to yourself as much as or more than others. Others simply believe the lies you tell yourself.
Do you do a lot of very hard illegal drugs? You'll probably overdose soon if you do. Because if you believe lies, you won't be a safe as possible drug user.
You'll think you can do more drugs than you can. That or someone will murder you. Best case scenario you go to prison.
What do you mean you dont think I'm committed lol? I'm 7 years in.
Explain what you mean when you say "You are lying to yourself as much as or more than others. Others simply believe the lies you tell yourself." Do you mean others believe the lies they tell themselves?
I am a glutton. I do everything in extreme excess. I've recently lost a lot of weight and feel great (fuck yeah). I have not stepped from the psychedelic to the addictive route because I am fully aware that if I ever do I wont come back. Heroin crack and meth will 100 percent kill my ass. I can tell you without ever having done these drugs FOR SURE if I did them for a week I would do them until my untimely death.
I quit weed when I had this revelation that I need to stop lying. So I just do psychedelics once a year.
This drug guess of yours is inaccurate only because I managed to have the foresight (for once lol).
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Anonymous #2
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Well no not really. You just admitted that if you did hard drugs, you'd ride them to the grave.
Maybe you are off meds?
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Anonymous #3
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Anonymous #1 said: At what point does doing the right thing stop outweighing being yourself?
If 'doing the right thing' and 'being yourself' are so much at loggerheads with each other then you need to seek professional help to find out why you're so damaged, before the cognitive dissonance drives you any further off the edge than you already are.
If 'being yourself' is treating others in a shitty way, then you are damaged, and badly.
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #2 said: Well no not really. You just admitted that if you did hard drugs, you'd ride them to the grave.
Maybe you are off meds?
Naw not off meds nor on meds.
I think you have to take the first post just as truth and not exaggeration. Just see it as an annoyed and frustrated person toiling to do the right thing.
I reckon I'm more probably.... learned behavior made me the manipulator... and now I'm learning to be something else? And I just prefer the manipulation.
It really bothers me that people like me when I lie and never guess that I lie.... but when I tell the truth I'm more likely to be hated and also get told that I lie. Its fucking paradoxical.
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Anonymous #2
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People know you are a shit bag and just do not risk a confrontation.
If you are bi-polar and not on meds, you are off meds. Perhaps you're not manipulating us then after-all.
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #3 said:
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Anonymous #1 said: At what point does doing the right thing stop outweighing being yourself?
If 'doing the right thing' and 'being yourself' are so much at loggerheads with each other then you need to seek professional help to find out why you're so damaged, before the cognitive dissonance drives you any further off the edge than you already are.
If 'being yourself' is treating others in a shitty way, then you are damaged, and badly.
How can we objectively say that stepping on a childs face to reach the apple is a damaged human?
Wouldnt objectively bad be stepping on a childs face just because?
(and of course objectively bad cant exist but indulge me for these conversational purposes)
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Anonymous #3
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Anonymous #1 said: It really bothers me that people like me when I lie and never guess that I lie....
I've met people like you before. I'm sure you manage to take in many but you'll never take in all. Some people will see straight through you. They'll humour you of course but at the back of their minds they'll be making a mental note to never trust you.
If you think otherwise, see my first post in this thread.
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #2 said: People know you are a shit bag and just do not risk a confrontation.
If you are bi-polar and not on meds, you are off meds. Perhaps you're not manipulating us then after-all.
This thing bugs me to no end. Me simply bringing up that I used to be a manipulator makes people think that I am currently manipulating them.
I am being as open and honest as I physically can be right now. I have no ulterior motive whatsoever.
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #3 said:
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Anonymous #1 said: It really bothers me that people like me when I lie and never guess that I lie....
I've met people like you before. I'm sure you manage to take in many but you'll never take in all. Some people will see straight through you. They'll humour you of course but at the back of their minds they'll be making a mental note to never trust you.
If you think otherwise, see my first post in this thread.
This is surface level. Of course some people are defensive stance but defensive stance people are manipulated too. I would compensate for people who think I am tricking them and double bluff them basically.
(its funny how you cant explain how good at you were at something without sounding arrogant and short-sighted)
Now that I havent done it in 7 years the only residual skill is seeing these manipulators and calling them out. I've only made 2 admit that they're faking emotions in my life. Both times they only did it when their targets left the room and it was just us. Its horrifying watching someone go from crying saying they want to kill themself to a wicked smile.
This girl was one of these people I made admit it. She was considering killing herself and crying hysterically and her husband left the house. When it was just us I said "I dont care if you kill yourself. You dont fool me for a second and you never have." and her crying totally stopped she looked over at me and grinned then said "I know you know" and left the room.
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Anonymous #2
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Anonymous #1 said:
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Anonymous #3 said:
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Anonymous #1 said: It really bothers me that people like me when I lie and never guess that I lie....
I've met people like you before. I'm sure you manage to take in many but you'll never take in all. Some people will see straight through you. They'll humour you of course but at the back of their minds they'll be making a mental note to never trust you.
If you think otherwise, see my first post in this thread.
This is surface level. Of course some people are defensive stance but defensive stance people are manipulated too. I would compensate for people who think I am tricking them and double bluff them basically.
(its funny how you cant explain how good at you were at something without sounding arrogant and short-sighted)
Now that I havent done it in 7 years the only residual skill is seeing these manipulators and calling them out. I've only made 2 admit that they're faking emotions in my life. Both times they only did it when their targets left the room and it was just us. Its horrifying watching someone go from crying saying they want to kill themself to a wicked smile.
This girl was one of these people I made admit it. She was considering killing herself and crying hysterically and her husband left the house. When it was just us I said "I dont care if you kill yourself. You dont fool me for a second and you never have." and her crying totally stopped she looked over at me and grinned then said "I know you know" and left the room.
Probably because it is wicked and short sighted.
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Anonymous #2
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Can fool some of them some of the time. Cannot fool them all all the time.
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #2 said: Can fool some of them some of the time. Cannot fool them all all the time.
Of course but the goal isnt perfection?
Lack of perfection does nothing here except give you a pretty little line to say.
If progress is made in broad strokes with failures here and there then its doing its job. Hell even if no progress is made and a risk was taken to achieve progress then its doing its job.
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Anonymous #1
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Well we keep coming back to this topic so I'll just ask you plainly:
Do you think modesty is manipulation? And why do you view modesty as less bad than bragging? And what benefit does modesty have for society and what benefit does bragging have for society?
Ayn Rand was hated by almost everyone. But that shit is accurate as all hell. If you claim to be the best at something.... and someone comes by and beats you at it... the shame youll feel will make you get better at that thing so you can beat them the next time around.
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Anonymous #3
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Anonymous #1 said: Now that I havent done it in 7 years the only residual skill is seeing these manipulators and calling them out.
So you can see them but others can't see you?
Right.......................
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #3 said:
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Anonymous #1 said: Now that I havent done it in 7 years the only residual skill is seeing these manipulators and calling them out.
So you can see them but others can't see you?
Right.......................
No I can see SOME of them and others SOMETIMES cant see them.
I do not have a magic ability to see every single lie ever told ever. Thats called a strawman argument.
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Anonymous #1
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Awe I left for 2 hours and thread death Anon 3's silly little checker move made it seem like I was beaten.
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Anonymous #4
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I've known people like OP They always think no one knows they are a complete and total liar but in reality, everyone knows they are full of shit and a total joke. Most people will just play along when they know there is no sense in calling someone on their bullshit
If you feel good about trying so hard to not be an asshole to people, then think about all the pedophiles and serial killers that "try so hard" to resist their urges but still act on their impulses sooner or later...you don't see anyone giving those guys pats on the back for their efforts
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Anonymous #1
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Yeah I get that but I'm finding that my friends and family think im a manipulator now.... but was nice back then. So how do you explain that shit?
They legit dont think I was a liar.
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Anonymous #2
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Maybe they are stupid?
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Anonymous #1
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So if someone is tricked by someone they are stupid? Dont high IQ people regularly get tricked with some of the most basic street tricks? Thats like a thing. "Nerds".
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Anonymous #1
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And again its about the fact that they used to say nothing about lies. And now that I'm as honest as I can physically be.... like to an insane degree.... I regularly am accused of manipulating.
Its like people need a clean cut version of something to be told to them. Something that has been formed in such a way as to remove suspicion. Real shit isnt like that so it can be misinterpreted.
Or maybe everyone assumes a layer of deception... and if youre lying they remove the layer to the truth... if youre telling the truth they assume youre lying.
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Anonymous #5
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Maybe try and mix it up. It sounds like you're bored with being nice, and you were entertained by being manipulative. Be nice to people but find a way to manipulate people into doing nice things. Who knows? Manipulating people negatively is not good morally or "spiritually." The reason you are perceived as a liar now is probably because you told everyone you used to lie to them to trick them. I read your first post and instantly didn't trust the rest of what you were posting out of instinct. I'm not saying you are lying but the baseline of trust I give to someone that I've never met is lower for you because you've flat out said you enjoyed and liked lying. Just be yourself and see what happens, why do you have to manipulate people for negative outcomes?
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
Anonymous #5 said: Maybe try and mix it up. It sounds like you're bored with being nice, and you were entertained by being manipulative. Be nice to people but find a way to manipulate people into doing nice things. Who knows? Manipulating people negatively is not good morally or "spiritually." The reason you are perceived as a liar now is probably because you told everyone you used to lie to them to trick them. I read your first post and instantly didn't trust the rest of what you were posting out of instinct. I'm not saying you are lying but the baseline of trust I give to someone that I've never met is lower for you because you've flat out said you enjoyed and liked lying. Just be yourself and see what happens, why do you have to manipulate people for negative outcomes?
Yeah this is exactly it lol.
Scenario: I'm a former manipulator and I need help. "OMG HES TRYING TO TRICK US! He doesnt need help!"
Its fucking lunatic shit up in here. Why do we even act like lies are uncommon? Why when someone admits to having been a liar they MUST be a psychopath or sociopath? Because lying is SUPER rare right ? lol get real.
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Anonymous #3
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Anonymous #1 said: Why when someone admits to having been a liar they MUST be a psychopath or sociopath? Because lying is SUPER rare right ? lol get real.
There's a lot more than lying involved here:
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Anonymous #1 said: I used to lie. Like a lot. I used to play every single person I met like puppets and could get anything I wanted out of them.
Nice spot of projection here too:
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Anonymous #1 said: Its fucking lunatic shit up in here. Why do we even act like lies are uncommon?
What's clear from this thread is that you're lying to yourself first and foremost. I hope you seek help to uncover your delusions.
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Anonymous #1
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You clearly checked out from this conversation.
Your only goal is to "win" the convo. You couldnt backtrack if you tried. And projecting? Pot calling the kettle black lol.
I wont be modest. Its manipulation. I dont care if it triggers people like you. All I see in you is a yapping dog taught by society to bark at anything that isnt humble.
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Anonymous #6
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Anonymous #2
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Actually psycholathy is pretty common. They are usually well liked. It's just not great humanity.
If you want to keep being a scumbag you can even be that and a hero. Ton's of military, police and surgeons are sociopaths.
But I think you'll probably go to prison for a long time. For every hustler, there's on that knows more games.
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Anonymous #1
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Come out of the "I hate anon 1" path for a moment.
Is it not possible that I simply lied and now dont lie? And find myself being accused of lying all the time now when I am not. But before when I lied... no one accused me of lying. Also experiencing less love now that I tell the truth?
I mean this thread is DRIPPING with proof of that lol. How many lies do you think I've told in this thread? 50? And yet I've told 0.
I REALLY feel like a large percentage of people lie. Like.... a lot. 70 percent? And people are used to being lied to. Have these packaged "truths" that feel good to hear. And when someone comes around and speaks with no filter.... suspicion is aroused.
I would KILL to know what people think. KILL to know how many of us lie. KILL to know the REAL truth. (maybe not actually kill lol)
If there was a button that would stop all lies.... I'd press it in an instant. And I've thought through the consequences of such a button press.
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Anonymous #3
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Didn't you accuse me of pulling a strawman argument up above? And now look here you are doing the exact same thing by trying to refocus on lies and how much other people tell them...
Can't say I'm at all surprised.
Fact of the matter is, you came out the gates on this subject arrogant and boastful about how you used to be able to manipulate and bend anyone to your will. You repeated this sentiment many times over. This makes you a distinctly unlikable person to anyone high in moral fiber.
Do you want a pat on the back that you've now stopped lying? Don't you think that most of us have to go through the same challenges to be good people? Why do you think you deserve recognition for not being a shitbag?
FWIW; I am not basing any of my feelings towards you on your past actions. Nobody is beyond redemption, IMO. But right here and now, over the days this thread has been running, all your input points to the fact that you're a shitty human NOW.
I don't want to win. I'd rather you did, cause you've got a lot that needs winning. You came here for feedback and here it is. I'm sorry if you don't like it.
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Anonymous #2
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Most people don't tell lies. They probably do reason beyond their full scope of understanding which is like a lie.
Reasoning is like a lie but it's not a bold lie all the time. I suspect op is trying to reason his way into the same bad behaviour that the world appears to thrive doing. Yet the world pays a price for reasoning.
Reasoning is not the whole truth.
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Anonymous #1
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So Anon 3 thinks everyone goes through what I went through..... Anon 2 thinks im a rare breed. WHO TO BELIEVE!
To anon 3: I believe whole-heartedly that modesty is bad. In every single way that it manifests itself. It is manipulation. I will state exactly how good I am at things that I am good at. And if I am proven wrong.... I will learn from that mistake and become better. It REALLY is that simple.
To anon 2: I think 2 things.... 1.... you could not know how many people lie. And 2... I think you are naive to think few people lie. Like... direct over-inflation of the truth to sound better. I think many of them even believe their lies.
Why is this convo so intensely about whether or not I am a "good person".
I am a human. Everything I do is a direct result of the chemistry in my brain and the environment in which I have existed. Same as both of you. How can you even "dislike" me. You should see the people I work with lol. I wonder to what degree you both are shielded from harsh realities of life that you can think of me as such a nuisance. A guy I dealt with last night had a Pez dispenser style finger almost-removal because he tried to stab his cousin over a can of beer. I think that guy is a victim to circumstance... not a sociopath lol.
What is that obi-wan quote? Only a sith deals in absolutes? Lol.
I hate my circumstance.... but.... there is a real joy in 100 percent truth. I dont need memory much for instance. I just say stories or events as they happened and everything I say lines up. That is really quite something! Though... my memory has faded and I wonder if its because I'm not holding up the spider webs of lies that I used to hold.
I have been told by some people irl... that everyone goes through this. That I am "growing up". And this is my first taste of paranoia/conscience/empathy. I dont know how to argue that that isnt accurate. A lot of the other arguments are easy to defend.
Louis C K has a good skit about smoking weed and getting paranoid. It really describes the way I interact. "Look at person 1 count to 5 now go left and look at person 2 count to 5 now randomize and go right look at person 3 count to 5." and "The way I am standing is weird no one stands like this! put your hands in your pockets!"
Before I had 0 cares and could handle every interaction very well. I had a really good grasp on the back and forth and was ready 5 seconds before the other person finished talking. I never had doubts, regrets, or these cringe moments I seem to be plagued by.
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Anonymous #3
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Anonymous #1 said: So Anon 3 thinks everyone goes through what I went through.
No, I think that 'growing up' is what yourself and others go through. I'm pretty amazed you could be so thick as to suspect I think everyone goes through the same things you have. I thought you were amazing at humans?
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Anonymous #1 said: To anon 3: I believe whole-heartedly that modesty is bad. In every single way that it manifests itself. It is manipulation. I will state exactly how good I am at things that I am good at. And if I am proven wrong.... I will learn from that mistake and become better. It REALLY is that simple.
OK so why your value judgement that modesty is bad?
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Anonymous #1 said: I am a human. Everything I do is a direct result of the chemistry in my brain and the environment in which I have existed. Same as both of you. How can you even "dislike" me.
No, you're a direct result of your DECISIONS and your ACTIONS. Most humans had unfavourable upbringings and environments, and for many they were downright destructive. I've known many whose sufferings have been intense, but most manage to be good people nonetheless.
There comes a point where one has to shoulder the entire responsibility for who they are. Have you not come to this point yet?
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #3 said:
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Anonymous #1 said: So Anon 3 thinks everyone goes through what I went through.
No, I think that 'growing up' is what yourself and others go through. I'm pretty amazed you could be so thick as to suspect I think everyone goes through the same things you have. I thought you were amazing at humans?
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Anonymous #1 said: To anon 3: I believe whole-heartedly that modesty is bad. In every single way that it manifests itself. It is manipulation. I will state exactly how good I am at things that I am good at. And if I am proven wrong.... I will learn from that mistake and become better. It REALLY is that simple.
OK so why your value judgement that modesty is bad?
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Anonymous #1 said: I am a human. Everything I do is a direct result of the chemistry in my brain and the environment in which I have existed. Same as both of you. How can you even "dislike" me.
No, you're a direct result of your DECISIONS and your ACTIONS. Most humans had unfavourable upbringings and environments, and for many they were downright destructive. I've known many whose sufferings have been intense, but most manage to be good people nonetheless.
There comes a point where one has to shoulder the entire responsibility for who they are. Have you not come to this point yet?
So change "everyone does it" to "its common" if that satisfies you. The point is one of you thinks its common and one of you thinks its rare lol.
I speak of modesty being bad because thats what I believe. I act according to that belief. And you keep bringing up that I'm arrogant. I am literally choosing to act this way for self improvement and I've said this over and over. It is a style of belief I got from Ayn Rand.
And how can you possibly believe our decisions exist beyond our environment? Lol. What do you think decisions are? Magic? Your anecdotal evidence that some people you know went through bad stuff and now are good people.... how can you think that means anything? Lol.
We are but mirrors reflecting our environment. I wasn't aware I was talking with someone that believes decisions are.... what? Just follow your thoughts through and it becomes obvious. What are decisions to you? Lol. "Me" and "my personality" are decisions? How did I come to those decisions? God?
I dunno man all the evidence points to you not being very bright. Or if not that.... simply anti-me and grasping at straws to prove that bias.
Let me ask you this.... if Einstein came back from the dead and traded places with me halfway through this sentence and started typing to you..... would you recognize it? Or would you continue to think I am falsely arrogant?
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Anonymous #2
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Einstein was very modest.
You seem to be a strait arrogant sociopath. Perhaps frontal lobe damage.
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #2 said: Einstein was very modest.
You seem to be a strait arrogant sociopath. Perhaps frontal lobe damage.
So if Einstein was typing to you right now... you would view me as modest then? You wouldnt continue to find ways to see me as arrogant?
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Anonymous #2
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That's not going to happen.
The most damage a sociopath does, is people believing in them and not seeing them as the lost cause they'll forever be.
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #2 said: That's not going to happen.
The most damage a sociopath does, is people believing in them and not seeing them as the lost cause they'll forever be.
Lol do you even hear yourself? How melodramatic are you? Reality isnt this interesting.
Wake up to yourself.
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Anonymous #2
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Lol dude you are an irritant.
At least some sociopaths make history. But you are not really against anything important. You are another bum that wants to be powerful, not knowing his limits.
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Anonymous #4
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Anon #1 - I started out not liking you so much, but now I'm leaning a little in your direction on this discussion.
Facts: Everyone lies, some a little, some a lot. Some lie big and some lie small...regardless everyone lies
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Anonymous #3
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Anonymous #1 said: I'm arrogant. I am literally choosing to act this way for self improvement and I've said this over and over.
You're a nasty piece of work right now. You can change that at any time you want but I can't engage any further with someone who regurgitates the shitty rhetoric that you do.
I hope you get better.
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #3 said:
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Anonymous #1 said: I'm arrogant. I am literally choosing to act this way for self improvement and I've said this over and over.
You're a nasty piece of work right now. You can change that at any time you want but I can't engage any further with someone who regurgitates the shitty rhetoric that you do.
I hope you get better.
"And you keep bringing up that I'm arrogant. I am literally choosing to act this way for self improvement and I've said this over and over. It is a style of belief I got from Ayn Rand."
Ahah did you just misquote me intentionally to make your argument? That is hysterical. You have NO Shame.
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Anonymous #2
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That's not what she is talking about. She's not talking about some negative way of getting what you want out of abusing people. She's simply saying that these things are required to not be treated like shit by life.
Which is plainly obvious to anyone that has gone without a lot of security in life.
What you do is take security for people, for very small gains.
Although she does seem to have taken to American red hysteria quite well. I think her books would have been different, if she remained in Russia. It's difficult to write and publish from the Gulags.
Edited by Anonymous (12/22/19 04:37 PM)
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Anonymous #1
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Anonymous #2 said: That's not what she is talking about. She's not talking about some negative way of getting what you want out of abusing people. She's simply saying that these things are required to not be treated like shit by life.
What things are required?
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Anonymous #2 said: What you do is take security for people, for very small gains.
What am I doing?
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Anonymous #1
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Just a thought I had today.
I wonder if throughout my life I developed reactionary responses and mannerisms that require me bullshitting to make them work. And now that I'm not bullshitting the reactions are being perceived as deceitful and sparking doubt and making people defensive. Like I am a bad liar and they wonder what I'm lying about.
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Anonymous #7
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This must be how the joker's point of view would be like. I had a friend that acted this way. Everyone in our group would hangout with him knowing he was deceitful and untrustworthy. Just like #3 said in this thread about his friend we'd humour him but know he was fucked up probably from a shit childhood.
He knew he had problems he took antidepressants that didn't seem to help much. He said he lacked emotion and empathy which are key signs of a sociopath. We looked down on him because he would say fucked up shit and we knew he was a damaged individual, functional in society but damaged none the less. I felt as though he might have problems in relationships on account of his lack of empathy/emotions. I feel sorry for people like this he seemed to want to change but couldn't.
Everyone's different but that's no way to treat others regardless of what you think it's wrong. I can genuinely see the point you're trying to make but that's not what humans are about.
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
Anonymous #7 said: This must be how the joker's point of view would be like. I had a friend that acted this way. Everyone in our group would hangout with him knowing he was deceitful and untrustworthy. Just like #3 said in this thread about his friend we'd humour him but know he was fucked up probably from a shit childhood.
He knew he had problems he took antidepressants that didn't seem to help much. He said he lacked emotion and empathy which are key signs of a sociopath. We looked down on him because he would say fucked up shit and we knew he was a damaged individual, functional in society but damaged none the less. I felt as though he might have problems in relationships on account of his lack of empathy/emotions. I feel sorry for people like this he seemed to want to change but couldn't.
Everyone's different but that's no way to treat others regardless of what you think it's wrong. I can genuinely see the point you're trying to make but that's not what humans are about.
I feel like you are hung up on what a lot of people in this thread are hung up on.
I was not being given a pass by super patient people unwilling to burst my bubble. Also they weren't stupid. And when i stopped lying all the time everyone started accusing me of lying.
Why is no one getting that? Lol.
I'm sure there were some people who passed through my life for short periods who were observant while also too kind or too weak to tell me i was a dick.
And FUCK we are like... debating whether or not I was good at it. Thats literally what this boils down to loooool. Fuck me.
I used to lie all the time. I got away with it. I got things my way. I was happy and unaware of other peoples feelings.
I took extreme efforts to 180 degree turn and stop lying. I go so far in not lying that if i shit my pants on accident and i am asked why im leaving the room I will respond "its personal" instead of making up a white lie excuse or saying I shit my pants. I am PSYCHOTICALLY honest. My conversations with people take AGES because I have to explain all these tiny fucking details and second guess everything that might possibly be misconstrued. I well up every single possible spot of doubt with mind-numbing analysis over the most trivial things.
If I say something like "Pizza is my favorite food" I will get trapped in this cycle of "well I kinda like burgers more maybe. No... no pizza. Pizza is my favorite." until eventually I have to end with "Well I dont really know what my favorite food is. I like a lot of food"
To be fucking honest its driving me batshit crazy. And to get called a liar so often now.... i mean fuck.
My brain is literally on the floor before them with ZERO filter and I am moving a fucking magnifying glass around looking at every tiny spot and NOW im a liar? Not before????
Look at this thread LOL. Its coming to fruition right in front of my eyes as I explain that it happens! Its fucking madness hahaha.
What else can I give? Or say?
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Anonymous #6
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You’re either a piece of shit or you aren’t.
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Anonymous #5
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I feel for you anon1 It's kind of like when someone does drugs and then gets clean, for the first little while no one trusts you or trusts your motives. As to before you get clean or before people knew about the drugs they were ignorant and none the wiser and didn't give you a hard time about anything. Except in your case you haven't been able to earn the trust back, even when you are brutally honest. I think some people in this thread are taking the chance to virtue signal at your expense instead of actually take the time and think of how shitty it must be. That's why I think you should just do you and if people can't trust you then it's not your problem. You can't control what people think of you, and the more you try the less it works. Keep being yourself and if you feel good about what you're doing then that's all you should care about.
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Anonymous #8
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I don't believe that the op is committed. His post comes off as braggadocios and reveals that he needs people to know that they have their free will because he chooses to allow it. It also reveals that he may believe that people should bend to his desires even though he isnt going to force it. I'm not impressed nor was asked to be, I'm simply saying that this is just another form of mental chess from the op..
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Anonymous #9
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Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: Well to more fully evaluate me I think it is important to note that I follow an ayn rand style of life philosophy
there it is. there's the problem.
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
Anonymous #9 said:
Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: Well to more fully evaluate me I think it is important to note that I follow an ayn rand style of life philosophy
there it is. there's the problem.
I dont think lying is beneficial to you in almost every circumstance.
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Anonymous #10
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I think that we all have a bit of manipulation and desire to control, I know I do and my wife sees it in me also, she use to call me the master manipulator. But, now years later, she understands that it is but a tool I use to to help find consensus or peaceful resolution. If a obese woman asked me if this dress makes her look fat, I will lie and say no, you look nice. So now are we lying and manipulating for a positive reason. I’m consider myself a moral and honest person but one truth I have found is that there isn’t much that is black and white. And op, don’t tell your wife that it’s not the dress making her look fat.....peace
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Anonymous #11
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I know someone who thinks he's a master at neuro-linguistic programing I've seen him use it on people and be successful but I immediately see though him when he'd try it on me.
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