Hello!, I've only recently found my way into the psychedelic world and initially was only to treat Clusterheadaches (successfully).
After managing to reduce clusterheadaches from 3-4 a day to only 3 over my 3 month cycle, I s Remembered seeing articles of using psilocybin to quit smoking.
I couldn't really find any details on how to achieve this, but I put my trust the the shroom and took a 4g dried and capsuled dose of a mix of psilocybin subaeruginosa and psilocybin subsecotioides.
Not going to get too much into the full trip report, but in short during the come up I was feeling pretty good about life, and went for a short walk in the nature reserve near home, the sounds and visuals in the bush were amazing.
Throughout the walk I was stating my intention to give up smoking (18-25 a day smoker) and as the trip kicked up a gear I started to feel like i needed to expunge the crap in my chest from smoking, but by this point i was walking through a residential area and didnt want to draw attention to myself, plus if i stopped moving i felt i would melt into the earth.
I started to feel pressured into going home by my partner who was having dinner ready. So i get home, and she asked how many eggs I would like... now im in no state to eat, im pretty much in no state to do anything, so i say none right now, and she gets pissed off... so i decided ill try make her happy and sit with her while she eats, and after a while I get the urge to go lie down.
So i go lie down on my bed, thinking how I want to quit smoking, and slowly drift into another world. Im brought back to the real world with my partner laying next to me, asking in a angry pissed off tone if im going to be like this all night. I laugh and say no idea, and start drifting away again, then she slaps me. Now I am getting irritated, and just ignore her and start thinking she knows im on shrooms, if shes pissed off with me now is not the time to deal with it, she can wait till i come down. Then she slaps me again, again I just ignore it, but start getting really annoyed. She knows about set and setting so wtf is she doing.
She eventually leaves, but the TV in the next room is blaring, doors are getting slammed, she gets in the shower and bangs and crashes around in the bathroom, so much for my intention of meditation to stop smoking....
I then start going 10 layers deep in analyzing why she is pissed off, checking my phone for messages leading up to her being pissed off etc, always coming back to im doing this for her too, she knows about set and setting, do i really want to be with a psychotic bitch who does this... its one thing to be pissed at someone, but to get pissed at someone, then take it out while knowing they are on some potent psychedelics just goes too far...
I realized that there were a couple of things in the messages sent before I took the mushrooms that she could legitimately be annoyed at me, but she should of told me she was pissed before i took the mushrooms. Eventually i get to the point where im leaving her (supposed to be getting married in 2 months) and screw giving up smoking, in fact im going for one now...
So i go to the living area, say Sorry i fucked up, but you could of told me not to take shrooms rather than letting me, thats so psychotic of you... and she looks at me like im going crazy... "Im not pissed off, not at all, so we tall for a few minutes, and shes not pissed off in the slightest... I even asked her niece who is staying with us if she is actually not pissed off...
So now im feeling like im the one going mad, so i get a smoke go sit outside and start processing it all again. After having 2 or 3 puffs, i clicked, it wasn't my partner pissed off, it was the addiction pissed off that i was trying to escape from it. It was trying to hold me so much it nearly had me leaving the love of my life.
I threw the smoke i had away, the came back inside and pulled the 5 or so left in my packet and threw them in the sink, and put them through the insinkerator, told my partner what I had worked out, and i felt free.
That was 3 days ago now, so still early days, but I honestly feel as though i will never smoke again.. no cravings for smokes, just an empty feeling from the habit of going outside for one on a regular basis, what do i do after dinner now? Etc... so to fill in those gaps for now im vaping 0% nicotine.
This was my 2nd attempt, the first attempt I used 3g, but when my partner appeared to get pissed off, I just shut myself down rather than facing the issues getting presented to me. I had no idea the issue was actually the addiction and it took alot of self reflection and analysis of the issue to understand what was being put before me. But I got there in the end...
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