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 sopp1e
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 Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience?   1
#26278894 - 10/26/19 05:13 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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I have self medicated depression with weed/hash for 6-7 years, and for years i was “sure” it was a positive thing. But over the years its been harder and harder to justify it to myself, even though i have been trying. It was the thing i looked forward to at the end of the day, and i found motivation in it through the day.
After my first psychedelic trip, i found the psychedelic properties and I really like that. And i found a lot of value from it. It can feel spiritual and i could figure stuff out. I could be very depressed and after a hash “meditation” i could find self worth/love, find a way out of my mental prison and wake up a “free” person and feel great. But it never last, the mental prison was just a day or two away. It often felt like a really profound experience, but i cant make i last. So this has made me hold on to it even more. But as time go by, i have started to loose faith in it because it just doesn’t last for me. Or i cant hold on to the “higher vibrations” or whatever it is.
So now I’m at the pointe where I’m taking a break from weed, not sure if it is for two month or forever(i dont think its forever;P ). But i really hope i can have a healthy relationship with it and that it can be a good thing for me again.
I have been without it for 3 weeks or so, and i its not a big problem at the moment to not vape/smoke.
Emotionally it is challenging, but i think I’m more aware of my feelings. It’s easier to put two and two together in a way. My mind is clearer i think.
I have had several trips(mushroom and lsd) that has felt important at the time, but the day after it just isn’t as profound and don’t mean as much. Not like the ayahuasca trips where the experience was with me a very long time.
Could it be the my weed habit and weed journeys that have made me numb? After three weeks without weed I’m not as nervous about my next mushroom trip. I’m kinda looking forward to it, not because i think it will be easy but because i feel like i could get something important from it and it could be important to me. More equipped to deal with it, to meet myself.
Not sure where I’m going with this, i guess I’m curious about others experience with quitting/taking a break from cannabis. And input about my situation here.
To be clear, i really love cannabis. It’s a amazing plant. But i think my relationship with it needs to change for it to be healthy for me.
Have a great weekend!
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Tripsten
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: sopp1e]
#26278913 - 10/26/19 05:27 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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I feel you , I’m in a very similar boat
The problem isn’t weed the actual plant, but the way in which it was used
Now let me say I’m not one of those guys that defends weed or goes around telling people it’s healthy which is complete BS.
But I will say the biggest lesson I’ve learned lately , which as been helping me take my life back from tons of cycles and habits , some I wasn’t even aware of , some I didn’t realize I was aware of and purposely fueling
The problem , at least in my mind, is the mode of using it in that manner
“I would look forward to it every day,”
It became a cycle for you , and living in cycles is the path of non growth
Be careful not to do your psychedelic adventures in the same way
Chasing that feeling of spirituality and awakening rather than learning it in the oscyhedellic and not cultivating it with in your sober mind
The key is discipline , not allowing your recreations or substances or foods or really not allowing anything to control you and always striving to have control over it
Which you are certainly showing, going cold for three weeks like that certainly shows a good grasp and talent for this
Keep that up ,
But as far as the fading psychedelic feeling
Well
First lemme ask what do you mean when you say that feeling fades
You mean the excited happy energetic holy damn feeling during the trip when you realize the revelation?
Or do you mean the actual lesson somehow leaves yo after the trip
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Tripsten
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: Tripsten]
#26278928 - 10/26/19 05:30 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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For example
Dale goes on a heavy trip
Learns of the oneness of everything
When he learns it the feeling is unmistakable
This insane energy feeling of being awake and existing in true knowledge
Feeling connected to everything
Powerful feelings like that that come with the trip and the learning
So if you’ve were Dale
Are you saying those feelings fade
Or the actual lesson you learned of the oneness is forgotten when your sober ?
Just for that hypothetical example scenario
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Vibe_Enthusiast
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: Tripsten] 1
#26279185 - 10/26/19 08:23 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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Don't really smoke weed. But mushrooms help me kick my cigarette addiction. I am now 25 days nicotine free.
Wasn't the mushrooms that made me quit, but definitely gave me the idea to quit. I give myself credit for doing so well. But I was smoking one during a trip.. and it just felt wrong. Nothing felt good about it whatsoever.
As long as things don't serve your a purpose, there's no reason to be a victim of it. I know weed has medical purposes and whatnot.. but if you want do anything without smoking weed.. well then... you're an addict. I mean there's obviously worse things out there.. but when you can't live a day without consuming this specific thing.. its definitely not ideal.
It's good to address the real problem than to use crutches. Same reason I quit smoking cold Turkey.
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sopp1e
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: Tripsten]
#26279615 - 10/27/19 04:57 AM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Tripsten said:
But I will say the biggest lesson I’ve learned lately , which as been helping me take my life back from tons of cycles and habits , some I wasn’t even aware of , some I didn’t realize I was aware of and purposely fueling
The problem , at least in my mind, is the mode of using it in that manner
“I would look forward to it every day,”
It became a cycle for you , and living in cycles is the path of non growth
Be careful not to do your psychedelic adventures in the same way
Chasing that feeling of spirituality and awakening rather than learning it in the oscyhedellic and not cultivating it with in your sober mind
The key is discipline , not allowing your recreations or substances or foods or really not allowing anything to control you and always striving to have control over it
Which you are certainly showing, going cold for three weeks like that certainly shows a good grasp and talent for this
Keep that up ,
But as far as the fading psychedelic feeling
Well
First lemme ask what do you mean when you say that feeling fades
You mean the excited happy energetic holy damn feeling during the trip when you realize the revelation?
Or do you mean the actual lesson somehow leaves yo after the trip
Discipline is the key, i agree with that. But it has taken me time to get to that conclusion. After reading many self help/spiritual books, searching for answers and insights. I realized that another book/podcast isn’t going to help me.
For change something is got to change and I’m the only one that can do something about it.
Ever since ayahuasca(my first psychedelic) i have been looking to get that reset that i got from aya. It set me free from my rigid mind, and opened me up for change. Felt very healing, and was way beyond what I dreamed it could be. And that stayed with me for a long time, but slowly faded away. Depression creeping back i guess. Depression is a egotistical state that closes off the mind. It really is a mental prison.
Weed helped me find my way out of that prison(some of the times). I used it as i would mushrooms, with closed eyes, headphones With a psychedelic playlist.
And would have emotional journeys that felt really profound. But after doing this countless time and not really getting any growth in the long run, that’s what got me to this break.
So I guess the lesson fades and don’t mean that much, it doesn’t make a big impact on me. Maybe i have been looking for that impact i felt from ayahuasca. That felt like it changed everything.
I could be a retreat setting is better for me, i have had a hard time letting go on mushrooms. And haven’t gotten as deep with mushrooms as i did with aya. I want/need that ego dissolving journey?
I’m not sure but I think I would be easier to let go now than when i had smooked weed the week before mushrooms. I hope so.
Appreciate your reply! Thanks
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sopp1e
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: Vibe_Enthusiast]
#26279634 - 10/27/19 05:20 AM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Vibe_Enthusiast said:
Don't really smoke weed. But mushrooms help me kick my cigarette addiction. I am now 25 days nicotine free.
Wasn't the mushrooms that made me quit, but definitely gave me the idea to quit. I give myself credit for doing so well. But I was smoking one during a trip.. and it just felt wrong. Nothing felt good about it whatsoever.
As long as things don't serve your a purpose, there's no reason to be a victim of it. I know weed has medical purposes and whatnot.. but if you want do anything without smoking weed.. well then... you're an addict. I mean there's obviously worse things out there.. but when you can't live a day without consuming this specific thing.. its definitely not ideal.
It's good to address the real problem than to use crutches. Same reason I quit smoking cold Turkey.
Congrats on quitting cigarettes! Nicotine can be a hard one to quit! I get my nicotine from snus(popular in Scandinavia). I’m getting of it one day, but not today.
It’s for sure an addiction. I haven’t smooked everyday, the last couple of years. But i have wanted to for sure. But fortunately now that I have a little distance from it its not something i think about to much.
It’s not the worst thing, and that’s one of the things that makes i hard to quit.
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Tripsten
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: sopp1e]
#26279723 - 10/27/19 07:10 AM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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No problem my man
I only say to be careful not to feeling chase, psychs will become a cycle then as welll
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Alyssa
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: sopp1e] 1
#26279766 - 10/27/19 07:54 AM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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I'm still not sure what we're supposed to be learning from drugs. What growth would you like to see in yourself that you're not achieving on weed, or on psychs because you've too recently smoked weed? What does the mental prison consist of? That phrase to me evokes where the unenlightened are, not where you are after expanding your consciousness on so many different natural keys to the power. I think you're holding yourself to a standard that may be impossible for anyone.
I'm just open to any experiences on any drug that goes in this subforum. I used to think we had to bring back a certain lesson and apply it, but maybe we don't. Maybe we just have to get high, because when you turn on, you learn whether you're trying to or not. Everyone is unaware of most of her/his potential until she/he has activated her/his mind with drugs. I submit that recording the information that you receive as you trip, no matter what it consists of, is the best way to carry it over after the drug wears off. Unlike dreaming, tripping provides the advantage of being able to operate in the physical as well as the spiritual dimension.
If weed makes you feel good, why is it hard to justify to yourself? You've been treating a serious mental illness with it for many years. That shows you that it works. But I can put myself in your place after 3 weeks of not smoking weed being a habitual smoker and be like "holy fucking shit, I feel awful for you" and that wouldn't take into account that your ideal life might not be getting high all the time and you might have constraints like money that when you're not smoking open way to a new way of doing things and that could be what you're striving for. Some realities are best lived in the physical dimension, love can be that way depending on the person.
My experiences of trying to quit weed have been high-anxiety hellholes but that's me and my circumstances, you've already pulled off a relatively long stretch of time and I'm not trying to convince you that it isn't working for you. I've thought about it so much but I can't stick to it. I buy a Q at a time and I always smoke them within a few days because I refuse to be sober at all as long as I've got weed, and then I'm stuck not being able to go out and do anything because I've spent all my money and I can't be fucked to leave the house anyway because I'm stoned. I used to travel and pull public stunts back when I wasn't dependent on weed. I might love to do it again. Or maybe not.
The analysis when personal growth is involved has to take into account cultural paradigms. Society pressures us into being something we're not already, it lowers our sense of self-worth such that we're suckered into living the lie to make us feel normal. I tend to think that with the world the way it is, we could do a whole hell of a lot worse than getting high on drugs and collaboratively writing down our insights like on the shroomery. Isn't that the only reasonable option at this stage of global catastrophe?
If you discipline yourself with conveying the message that drugs unlock in your mind, I think you'll find the answer you're looking for without having to give up the intensely pleasurable sensations that cannabis brings us from Gaia. These plants and fungi are all keys to cosmic reality. As Terence McKenna pointed out decades before his time, humanity is being infantilized by prohibition. Marijuana legalization has come in a few places since then, but until psychedelics are used in education (actual high school), bullshit is getting drilled into our brains from day 1 and it takes an immense amount of spiritual power to overcome the negative emotions that we internalize because psychedelics are mostly illegal or at the very least severely frowned upon by the institutions that we're taught to let dictate our lives.
To let you know in case it would help you remember it and not lose faith, I will attempt to describe what I think the hidden reality consists of in a general sense as Terence did, but I haven't tripped in years and I'm 2 days away from my first acid trip so I think I should wait to see how much deeper the revelation is for me than what I've learned from salvia and weed. Then I'm sure I'll be prolific about it.
If I'm on the wrong track by thinking drugs are the way forward, I'm not acknowledging it now, I've been in a frame of mind where I've given up on drugs before but I'm feeling a lot more negative about the world now than when I've thought we didn't need drugs. Not because anything has changed, but because I'm bipolar. That's why my posts are pretty chaotic and unreliable, but in case I happen to say the right thing at the right time, I'll keep communicating from whatever crazy reality I've created.
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I'm Alyssa.
I'm consecrated to the Immaculate Heart.
I don't want her to have to look at adultery to save my privileged living cells, so please keep it PG-13.
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PrimalSoup
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: sopp1e] 1
#26279772 - 10/27/19 07:57 AM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
sopp1e said:
So I guess the lesson fades and don’t mean that much, it doesn’t make a big impact on me. Maybe i have been looking for that impact i felt from ayahuasca. That felt like it changed everything.
I could be a retreat setting is better for me, i have had a hard time letting go on mushrooms. And haven’t gotten as deep with mushrooms as i did with aya. I want/need that ego dissolving journey?
I’m not sure but I think I would be easier to let go now than when i had smooked weed the week before mushrooms. I hope so.
Breakthroughs with mushrooms mostly take place at higher doses and set and setting are important.
That said I smoked weed daily for years back when I was growing it. Trying it again recreationally I find it doesn't bring the clarity of mushrooms and is much more prone to becoming a habit that can easily be overdone. And the cues are all there to make it work like that, as strong as ever. Probably like alcoholism - just because you're sober doesn't mean you're not an alcoholic.
The mushrooms however allowed/forced me to quit weed entirely quite a long time back. I'm sure they'll do this again as I'm growing them again. I found I didn't miss weed after a while and was on the whole better for it. It sounds to me that's like what you're looking for.
Mushrooms also have vastly helped my bipolar II by resetting me reliably to the up cycle. I wouldn't ever want to give that up. 
So I'd say grow mushrooms and cultivate your relationship with them. It might well surprise you. 
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if you stand too close to the machine it'll start to eat youPrimal's simple tested teks and projects: Wheat Prep 2.0 Acidic Tea Tek Potency Project!
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pixelpopper
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: PrimalSoup]
#26280545 - 10/27/19 03:46 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
PrimalSoup said:
That said I smoked weed daily for years back when I was growing it. Trying it again recreationally I find it doesn't bring the clarity of mushrooms and is much more prone to becoming a habit that can easily be overdone. And the cues are all there to make it work like that, as strong as ever. Probably like alcoholism - just because you're sober doesn't mean you're not an alcoholic.
Totally relate. Have been a heavy daily smoker during many periods in my life. End up quitting because it just isn't that great when partaking so regularly, and also causes health issues for me with my lungs, oral health and general mental states not being very clear. But whenever I quit, the triggers are very present and its very easy to get the urge to smoke.
I'm wanting to grow again, mainly because I just love growing marijuana. Its a very nice plant to grow... but I'm sure I'll pick it back up if so. Going to try to focus on just using in edible format instead of smoking, and keep usage dialed down to more focused session usage instead of daily casual... but its very hard to stay restrained after a lifetime of being a pothead.
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Rot
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: pixelpopper]
#26280636 - 10/27/19 04:25 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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My experience was not being able to fall asleep for 4 nights.
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AlwaysAtHeight
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: Rot]
#26284672 - 10/29/19 11:27 AM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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I'm on day 2 of a break. A few triggers and urges but they get better with time. Not going to say I don't miss it, but I don't feel I need it. I try to take 2-4 weeks off every 6 months or so. I smoke a good amount when I smoke. There is no one hit after work, just a wake up and remain high until the end of the day. I have a ton of experience with being addicted to alcohol and heroin. It took me 3 years of being completely sober before I dared dabble back in the cannabis, and I'm glad I did. I have no more desire to drink or use opiates (or stimulants) then before I started back up. Gateway my ass. Anyway my story is just that, just a story and just mine.
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The trick is in what one emphasizes. We either make ourselves miserable, or we make ourselves happy. The amount of work is the same.
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 nooneman
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: sopp1e]
#26285153 - 10/29/19 03:08 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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I've quit and restarted a number of times. In the beginning, you feel like you'll never get back to normal when you quit, but eventually you do. The first week or two is probably the hardest, with the first few days being extremely difficult to abstain.
I find that it's easier to quit if there's no weed anywhere in my house when I'm quitting. If there's any weed whatsoever at home then I can never seem to make it through those first few days, but if I have no weed at all at home then I stand a much better chance.
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pixelpopper
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: nooneman]
#26285159 - 10/29/19 03:13 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
nooneman said:
I find that it's easier to quit if there's no weed anywhere in my house when I'm quitting. If there's any weed whatsoever at home then I can never seem to make it through those first few days, but if I have no weed at all at home then I stand a much better chance.
yup, that's usually the way i quit... smoke it all till its gone and then don't get any more for months.
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sopp1e
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: Alyssa]
#26287601 - 10/30/19 04:27 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Alyssa said:
I'm still not sure what we're supposed to be learning from drugs. What growth would you like to see in yourself that you're not achieving on weed, or on psychs because you've too recently smoked weed? What does the mental prison consist of? That phrase to me evokes where the unenlightened are, not where you are after expanding your consciousness on so many different natural keys to the power. I think you're holding yourself to a standard that may be impossible for anyone.
I'm just open to any experiences on any drug that goes in this subforum. I used to think we had to bring back a certain lesson and apply it, but maybe we don't. Maybe we just have to get high, because when you turn on, you learn whether you're trying to or not. Everyone is unaware of most of her/his potential until she/he has activated her/his mind with drugs. I submit that recording the information that you receive as you trip, no matter what it consists of, is the best way to carry it over after the drug wears off. Unlike dreaming, tripping provides the advantage of being able to operate in the physical as well as the spiritual dimension.
If weed makes you feel good, why is it hard to justify to yourself? You've been treating a serious mental illness with it for many years. That shows you that it works. But I can put myself in your place after 3 weeks of not smoking weed being a habitual smoker and be like "holy fucking shit, I feel awful for you" and that wouldn't take into account that your ideal life might not be getting high all the time and you might have constraints like money that when you're not smoking open way to a new way of doing things and that could be what you're striving for. Some realities are best lived in the physical dimension, love can be that way depending on the person.
My experiences of trying to quit weed have been high-anxiety hellholes but that's me and my circumstances, you've already pulled off a relatively long stretch of time and I'm not trying to convince you that it isn't working for you. I've thought about it so much but I can't stick to it. I buy a Q at a time and I always smoke them within a few days because I refuse to be sober at all as long as I've got weed, and then I'm stuck not being able to go out and do anything because I've spent all my money and I can't be fucked to leave the house anyway because I'm stoned. I used to travel and pull public stunts back when I wasn't dependent on weed. I might love to do it again. Or maybe not.
The analysis when personal growth is involved has to take into account cultural paradigms. Society pressures us into being something we're not already, it lowers our sense of self-worth such that we're suckered into living the lie to make us feel normal. I tend to think that with the world the way it is, we could do a whole hell of a lot worse than getting high on drugs and collaboratively writing down our insights like on the shroomery. Isn't that the only reasonable option at this stage of global catastrophe?
If you discipline yourself with conveying the message that drugs unlock in your mind, I think you'll find the answer you're looking for without having to give up the intensely pleasurable sensations that cannabis brings us from Gaia. These plants and fungi are all keys to cosmic reality. As Terence McKenna pointed out decades before his time, humanity is being infantilized by prohibition. Marijuana legalization has come in a few places since then, but until psychedelics are used in education (actual high school), bullshit is getting drilled into our brains from day 1 and it takes an immense amount of spiritual power to overcome the negative emotions that we internalize because psychedelics are mostly illegal or at the very least severely frowned upon by the institutions that we're taught to let dictate our lives.
To let you know in case it would help you remember it and not lose faith, I will attempt to describe what I think the hidden reality consists of in a general sense as Terence did, but I haven't tripped in years and I'm 2 days away from my first acid trip so I think I should wait to see how much deeper the revelation is for me than what I've learned from salvia and weed. Then I'm sure I'll be prolific about it.
If I'm on the wrong track by thinking drugs are the way forward, I'm not acknowledging it now, I've been in a frame of mind where I've given up on drugs before but I'm feeling a lot more negative about the world now than when I've thought we didn't need drugs. Not because anything has changed, but because I'm bipolar. That's why my posts are pretty chaotic and unreliable, but in case I happen to say the right thing at the right time, I'll keep communicating from whatever crazy reality I've created.
Thanks for you reply. I agree a lot of what you are saying.
When i say i have self medicated, its good and bad. Earlier i felt a lot better about because i could dive in and get gems and free myself. And I didn’t feel guilty about it because i felt it helped my depression. But after time i see it only helps a day og two. And i dont feel so great about smoking anymore. With mental prison i mean that i stuck “inside” myself and don`t see my life or reality for what it is. My thinking and feelings are very limited and self destructive. Stuck in negative thought patterns. And dislike myself for being/thinking that way knowing its another way.
After ayahuasca i felt so free, I noticed i could think in a different ways. See things from different perspectives.
So that is what i have been seeking with psychedelics and also sometimes with weed. With aya it lasted a long time. With weed only a day or two.
I felt enlightened but gradually less and less. I am holding myself to an unrealistic standard, and i have know that for years, But still I have not been able to change.
So I’m taking a break just to see if that changes anything to the better. And hope to go back to it and maybe smoke once or twice a month. But i dont know if that is realistic, i have tried before to slow down with varying results.
Have u had you acid trip? Hope it was a great trip!
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Pandemoon
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: sopp1e]
#26287609 - 10/30/19 04:32 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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I have managed to stop smoking weed daily. Been smoking daily for 10 years or so. Now for the last year it's only once or twice a month.
It's good. Saves money and makes you more active. 
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sopp1e
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: sopp1e]
#26287622 - 10/30/19 04:38 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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I also couldn’t have weed in the house. But i found a way that worked pretty good :
https://www.thekitchensafe.com/  I wanted to cut back to only weekends, and it worked some of the time. But often I didn’t “lock it down” until Wednesday. Sunday became Monday and so on.
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sopp1e
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: sopp1e]
#26287629 - 10/30/19 04:41 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Pandemoon said:
I have managed to stop smoking weed daily. Been smoking daily for 10 years or so. Now for the last year it's only once or twice a month.
It's good. Saves money and makes you more active.
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That’s great, well done. Did you have a break and then started again only once or twice a month?
Is it still hard to only smoke a couple of times a month?
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Alyssa
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: sopp1e]
#26288042 - 10/30/19 07:01 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
sopp1e said:
Thanks for you reply. I agree a lot of what you are saying.
When i say i have self medicated, its good and bad. Earlier i felt a lot better about because i could dive in and get gems and free myself. And I didn’t feel guilty about it because i felt it helped my depression. But after time i see it only helps a day og two. And i dont feel so great about smoking anymore. With mental prison i mean that i stuck “inside” myself and don`t see my life or reality for what it is. My thinking and feelings are very limited and self destructive. Stuck in negative thought patterns. And dislike myself for being/thinking that way knowing its another way.
After ayahuasca i felt so free, I noticed i could think in a different ways. See things from different perspectives.
So that is what i have been seeking with psychedelics and also sometimes with weed. With aya it lasted a long time. With weed only a day or two.
I felt enlightened but gradually less and less. I am holding myself to an unrealistic standard, and i have know that for years, But still I have not been able to change.
So I’m taking a break just to see if that changes anything to the better. And hope to go back to it and maybe smoke once or twice a month. But i dont know if that is realistic, i have tried before to slow down with varying results.
Have u had you acid trip? Hope it was a great trip!
I see myself reflected in all of what you're saying except the ayahuasca since I've never done a drug like that. Maybe if I could have gotten the acid by now I'd be saying I've experienced that freedom from a drug. I'm always stuck in a negative thought bubble without being able to see myself unless I'm manic, which only happens when I go off my meds and then I always end up getting committed to the loony bin and put back on them to bring me down. It's happened to me 10 times over the last 13 years (since I started smoking weed), the most recent time was this year and I'd been clean off weed for over 2 years when I went psychotic and manic.
All the rest of the time I'm in the mental prison no matter how much I smoke anymore. My first manic episode was probably triggered by weed and I felt the freedom you describe from ayahuasca. I was so productive back then, I learned so much about writing music and I taught myself Spanish. This time I haven't been able to maintain the feeling because I know too much for a full break from reality anymore. Even when I was psychotic I was still conscious of the world. It's been like that for me for years.
It was back when I was 19 that I could travel with my soul away from this planet for a while and then come back like I'd done ayahuasca. I had my soul awakening that year. I'm 32 now and I feel so old because the magic is gone from how I see the reality around me, every year the global situation seems less hopeful now as it so often is perceived when youth is starting to wear off. I can return to innocence for a few months every now and then when they let me off my meds or when I finally learn to control the power and not get locked up.
I should quit smoking weed because it doesn't give me the power anymore. Now I have that built into my brain and the standard I've set for myself achieving on weed is impossibly high nowadays. All I'm doing is fucking myself over smoking joint after joint all day long every day, but I find it incredibly difficult to stop because I remember what it was like to feel like this and think I could have my dream and I still feel that release even though I rationally understand that the factors involved make my dream a highly unlikely course of events.
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I'm Alyssa.
I'm consecrated to the Immaculate Heart.
I don't want her to have to look at adultery to save my privileged living cells, so please keep it PG-13.
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Vibe_Enthusiast
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Re: Have you quit a daily weed habit, what was your experience? [Re: Pandemoon]
#26288228 - 10/30/19 08:04 PM (4 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Pandemoon said:
I have managed to stop smoking weed daily. Been smoking daily for 10 years or so. Now for the last year it's only once or twice a month.
It's good. Saves money and makes you more active.
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I work out 6 days a week. But quitting smoking after all.those years of smoking has been one of the best choices I have ever made.
And talk about money.. I'm saving $300 a month now!
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