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Offlineyeah
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Sublimating sexual urges
    #25869818 - 03/12/19 04:09 PM (4 months, 6 days ago)

I've tried Mantak Chia's cool draw, sacral/cranial pump and big draw. None of that helps me with not needing to bust.

What works?


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InvisibleJokeshopbeardM
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: yeah] * 2
    #25869925 - 03/12/19 04:44 PM (4 months, 6 days ago)

Discipline and self control.


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Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


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Offlineyeah
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #25869930 - 03/12/19 04:46 PM (4 months, 6 days ago)

nah man for me the urge is too physical to just tough through, can't focus on anything


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Offlineyeah
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: yeah]
    #25869933 - 03/12/19 04:47 PM (4 months, 6 days ago)

I just meditated outside and it took awhile but helped


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InvisibleJokeshopbeardM
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: yeah]
    #25869954 - 03/12/19 04:55 PM (4 months, 6 days ago)

Quote:

yeah said:
nah man for me the urge is too physical to just tough through, can't focus on anything



"Nah man, for me the urge to fuck/take drugs/gamble/steal/lie/etc/etc is too strong and I can't resist it."

You do realise what a total cop out answer that is don't you? If another human can control themselves, then so can you.

Perhaps you should go to AA or something, cause you sound like one of those people that needs to say 'I am powerless to control my urges!'.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


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Offlineyeah
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #25869996 - 03/12/19 05:11 PM (4 months, 6 days ago)

you're kind of being a dick, bro

what the fuck am I supposed to do if the only thing I can process is the feeling in my dick? Not to mention I JUST said that I meditated and it helped. But you seem too eager to take a holier than thou attitude in a thread asking for advice. lots of people do that in this forum and I'd expect more from a mod.


--------------------
Not all those who wander are lost.


Edited by yeah (03/12/19 05:12 PM)


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InvisibleJokeshopbeardM
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: yeah] * 1
    #25870048 - 03/12/19 05:30 PM (4 months, 6 days ago)

I'm not being a dick in order to try and be a dick.

I may be blunt in the way I try to help, but I assure you that my heart is in the right place and I am only trying to help, nothing more and nothing less.

I mean seriously though; my dick throbbed like fuck for any hole as a teenager. Still does now to a lesser extent, and for only certain holes. So what? It's part of being a man. Short of removing your testicles there's pretty much fuck all you can do about it.

I don't know if you want to just vent, or if you want me to mollycoddle you with some kind of 'there there, it's alright' kind of advice, but you need to take this thing into your own hands (LOL) and just learn to control yourself. Sure you can work with distraction as a tactic, but having a dick is having a dick, and the urge will come back sooner or later.

So what's better? Distraction and not dealing with it or dealing with it by means of discipline and self control?

The former only works for so long. The later works for ever, once you master it.

I wish you all the best, either way.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


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Offlineyeah
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #25870063 - 03/12/19 05:36 PM (4 months, 6 days ago)

Yeah I just want to know ways to make the urge go away, not be told to just suffer through it for the rest of my life. For me it doesn't go away on its own once it starts, I've tried applying self control and after a few days of day in day out agony I realized that I needed another approach.



--------------------
Not all those who wander are lost.


Edited by yeah (03/12/19 05:37 PM)


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Anonymous #1

Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: yeah] * 2
    #25870110 - 03/12/19 05:59 PM (4 months, 6 days ago)

You need stuff to work on and stay productive. Or just beat ur dick until it can't be beaten any more. Then find productive stuff to do with your time


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Offlineflugelizor
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #25871173 - 03/13/19 08:19 AM (4 months, 5 days ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
You need stuff to work on and stay productive. Or just beat ur dick until it can't be beaten any more. Then find productive stuff to do with your time



This
If you have a tenancy toward obsessive focus on sex, a busy job will keep your mind off it.


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OfflineGeinstein
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: flugelizor]
    #25871177 - 03/13/19 08:25 AM (4 months, 5 days ago)

Options:
Go get a hooker
Ask one of your female friends for sex
Ask a random person to have sex with the(this actually works)
Get a Fuck buddy(really make shore it Mutual or else you end up with overly attached Girl that your just into enough for sex)


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Offlineflugelizor
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: Geinstein]
    #25871185 - 03/13/19 08:48 AM (4 months, 5 days ago)

Quote:

Geinstein said:
Options:
Go get a hooker
Ask one of your female friends for sex
Ask a random person to have sex with the(this actually works)
Get a Fuck buddy(really make shore it Mutual or else you end up with overly attached Girl that your just into enough for sex)



OK, but IMHO having sex doesn't stop compulsive thought/behavior.
OP asked how to stop sex, not have sex.
But I'm not a psychologist.


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Offlineyeah
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: flugelizor] * 1
    #25871206 - 03/13/19 09:13 AM (4 months, 5 days ago)

Yeah I'm more interested in things that work in the short term, too. Like meditations or breathing exercises.

I get that lifestyle adjustments are a big part of it but they are harder to implement and I need something that works fast now that I am back into combat sports and my test is spiking.

You'd think consistent martial arts training would be a good outlet but noooo it just has to make it worse :crankey:


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InvisibleJokeshopbeardM
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: yeah]
    #25872610 - 03/13/19 10:08 PM (4 months, 5 days ago)

Quote:

yeah said:
but they are harder to implement



What worth having ever came easy?


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


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InvisibleBlu Spore
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: yeah] * 1
    #25872674 - 03/13/19 10:35 PM (4 months, 5 days ago)

Why do you feel it necessary to sublimate the urge in the first place? If you are young and male then the urge is a natural function, if anything it means you are healthy.

Even with spiritual practice or meditation will not eliminate urges or so-called negative emotions like anger or jealousy. You simply become aware and less dominated by them. You still get the feelings arising but have a modicum of control whereas before you may totally identify with the feeling. (I think spiritual control of all states is almost unheard of nowadays in the west)

you could just ride it out...My sex drive is less now at mid 30's than my 20's and I imagine by old age I may wish it was still there at all.

Maybe channel it into a functional relationship?


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Invisibletyrannicalrex
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: yeah]
    #25883608 - 03/19/19 03:12 PM (3 months, 30 days ago)

You can beat this! Take matters into your own hands!


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OfflineLogicaL ChaosM
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: yeah]
    #25895322 - 03/25/19 08:33 AM (3 months, 24 days ago)

Highly recommend mediating. Theres a calming quality to repeated meditation that helps center yourself. Very beneficial.

However, the most difficult thought-distraction to overcome for Tibetan Monks is sexual thoughts. Blasting past it is the tricky part.


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Offlineyeah
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: LogicaL Chaos]
    #25895420 - 03/25/19 10:20 AM (3 months, 24 days ago)

Yeah I meditate.

When I'm horny I don't even necessarily think about anything sexual, though. There's just an overwhelming physical urge to seek release and it's analogous to the feeling you get in your stomach when you're hungry.

The last time I opted to meditate first before fapping it helped a little but and then just came back in an hour.


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OfflineLogicaL ChaosM
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: yeah]
    #25895441 - 03/25/19 10:33 AM (3 months, 24 days ago)

Yeah. It can be very much a physical thing, like a need to exercise. Perhaps weight lifting might help?


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InvisibleJokeshopbeardM
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Re: Sublimating sexual urges [Re: yeah] * 1
    #25895442 - 03/25/19 10:35 AM (3 months, 24 days ago)

Do you not see that, as a human male, this urge is completely unavoidable?

You wouldn't be here right now were it not for the urge of all living things to procreate. That's what life does, and has been doing, for 3.5 billion years.

Perhaps, if you become a monk and live on the outer edge of society (or in a cave) for many, many years and spend all your days in practice, you could overcome it along with any other human facet, but it seems silly to seek to change that which is one of your prime reasons for existing without changing your entire life in pursuit of that goal.

Still, there's always the option of testicular removal if it gets too much for you.

Quote:

LogicaL Chaos said:
Perhaps weight lifting might help?



That would almost certainly make it worse. Higher testosterone levels = increased sexual desire.

I like it personally. I love being horny, whether I'm getting any or not. It makes me feel alive, and human.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


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