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Registered: 06/08/03
Posts: 10,629
I think I might have depression
    #2578205 - 04/19/04 04:22 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

I think I might have depression; I don't know as I have no knowledge of mental ill-health. However, here's my story.

Last year, I got very depressed about death. That's very cliched, I know, and nobody I knew had died, I just started thinking about it anc got very scared. It was common for me to feel sick whenever I though about it (which was every day for most of the day) and I frequently threw up. All I wanted to do was forget about it. I kept thinking I would. I went through exams, I went on holiday, but I couldn't shake it off. Eventually, i got to the point where I had pretty much dealt with it, I didn't think about it. The period of depression lasted about 4-6 months.

Since then I've been absolutely fine. Even when I remembered it, I could think "fuck it" and get on. However, last Friday I was in the shower and I got thinking about it, then felt sick and threw up. Since then I've been feeling really depressed only now, I don't know why! I can't pinpoint the root of my feelings. I think the thing that made me relapse was the light - in spring it's a very cold, grey light, very overcast, and I think that was why, as last year when I first got depressed that was the kind of weather I was experiencing. I guess it made me really think about it.

Since then, I've been worry about it. I can control the naseau: watching TV makes me feel fine! I don't think about it at all. But I have exams coming up, and the threat of depression makes it really hard to concentrate, which I need to do.

Should I see a doctor? Is my problem treatable? I'm terrified that if I see a doctor and try to deal with this shit, he might not be able to help me.

Thank you for reading, I would love some advice.


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Stop Bush's war
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Re: I think I might have depression [Re: OJK]
    #2579109 - 04/19/04 08:11 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

Yeah of course. Depression is very treatable. You could go to the doctor and of course the way they help is prescribe pills. Though pills can be very useful for some people. You could also see a psychologist who specialises in treating depression. I researched in depression for years and have suffered it myself a few times, and psychological techniques do work. There are a couple of good self-help books out there - the acadecic psychiatry unit I used to work for recommended 'Beating the Blues' and Learned Optimism' - I have read the latter but not the former and can vouch for it. Also, some techniques that I posted in another thread may be helpful

- write a list of things you enjoy doing. Try to do one a day. When you don't feel like doing something, do it anyway without thinking about it.
-make yourself get out of bed in the morning - as soon as you do the world is better outside your head
- cope with the present problems in your life. Try not to worry about the past or the future.
-break down tasks into manangeable pieces and just do a bit at a time
- exercise - great for stress and depression
- write out how you feel
- catch your negative thoughts and challenge them - is the problem permanent, pervasive or personal? Most often they are temperary, situational and there is evidence you are a better person than you are telling yourself. Is there an up side to the situation or things in your life that are going well that you are not thinking of? When you have done so put off thinking about whatever you were thinking about and distract yourself.
- or when a negative thought comes into your head try to block it out (say 'STOP') and go do something
- practice relaxation exercises
- Try to be with other people. Do something nice for someone else
- Accept that you don't have to be perfect at everything or anything and that it is OK to be average.

Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation as kids, we'd all be running around in a darkened room, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

"Being bitter and hateful is like drinking a vial of poison and hoping the other person gets sick" FreakQLibrium

"My motto from here on out is: If someone or something (including me) in my life is conducting themselves in such a way that they can be seen on Jerry Springer, it's time to take out the garbage!!! When you stop taking their behaviour personally and see their antics as a true reflection on their character, it becomes absolutely nauseating." Anon. on abusive relationships.

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Leaving YourWasteland

Registered: 10/23/02
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Re: I think I might have depression [Re: OJK]
    #2579573 - 04/19/04 10:08 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

I remember this exactly when i was younger.

I was about 9 years old at the time, and for some strange reason i all of a sudden developed this GREAT fear of death, and losing my mind. Well, i slowly started to feel that if i didnt die, i would lose my mind, and losing my mind meant death in a sense as well.

Then life took a big turn for me, my distant father had died in a fire. I think it was then that i realized the fragility of life. This man poured his whole life in a shot glass, and down it went, it burned all down.

Of course the majority of his life he spent drikning away his sorrows, his fear of death, or his sorrow at his fathers death... Sometimes its hard to accept the fact that we wont be here tomorrow, but for all we know, that could be true.

We may never know when we are going to die, all we have is what has been givin to us. What happens in death is not as important so much now as what we do with the life that has been given to us. If we can find away to make our lives more than anything, we will transcend death, so to speak.

Without death, their cannot be life. This is a part of the eternal cycle. There are fellow friend who share the same burden as you, do not feel alone. For you are not :wink:


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Stoner ReekingHavok

Registered: 04/10/03
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Re: I think I might have depression [Re: Zero7a1]
    #2582955 - 04/20/04 03:10 PM (14 years, 2 months ago)

I know how it feels man i was diagnosed as a child been on medication and been to therpy, grp therpy best thing you can do man is find some close friends you can confied in and talk about all the things that bother you with them. I promise you will feel alot better getting them out of mouth.

I work my shitty 9-5 and I pay my taxes, I'm not hurting anybody else. So why do you care what i do in my spare time.

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Re: I think I might have depression [Re: OJK]
    #2596376 - 04/23/04 11:32 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

I would also suggest, just time, I guess you could call it meditation, time where your not doing anything, don't even think, this doesn't meen your mind is completely empty, just allow your thoughts to enter your mind as they naturally will, wether they be about death or whatever. You'd be suprised how much doing nothing can help.

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Registered: 05/18/03
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Re: I think I might have depression [Re: OJK]
    #2597664 - 04/24/04 12:55 PM (14 years, 1 month ago)

the exams you are getting readyto take is probably causing the stress which is causing your depression. once school is over and the sunny days of summer is upon us your mood will pick up.

hang in there

Live each day like it will be your last, tomorrow my never come.

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