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OfflineMisterKite
Stranger
Male User Gallery

Registered: 12/24/02
Posts: 655
Loc: Montreal, QC
Last seen: 9 years, 5 months
Giving up hope
    #2547515 - 04/11/04 12:42 AM (13 years, 1 month ago)

My life has reached a horrible plateau. It's been there really since I dumped my girlfriend 3 months ago. I feel entirely empty, and extremely desperate for some sort of change. Well, at least that's how I felt. Now, I've decided to just stop searching for some person that could make me feel happy again, and just have no faith at all. That way I can never get disappointed.

I feel like each day is just another layer surrounding my death drying up and falling off. Pointless, with all activities it encompasses just fruitless meanderings to offer a morsel of entertainment that fades away before it's enjoyed. A terrible, terrible void that seems to be cloaked by either the nurturing of a lover or the joys of subsatnce abuse. I've quit using drugs(except for smoking lots of cigarettes), and it seems as though loneliness will be here for a much longer time.

Even this is exemplary of my pathetic stance. Another thread to bore my minutes with, giving empathy this time with myself. How putrid. How self indulgent. But frankly, I know none of you and perhaps someone's words can give some much needed inspiration.


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"But for the sake of some little mouthful of flesh we deprive a soul of the sun and light, and of that proportion of life and time it had been born into the world to enjoy."


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OfflineTimeTraveler
Another

Registered: 11/12/03
Posts: 46
Loc: I'm right here.
Last seen: 12 years, 5 months
Re: Giving up hope [Re: MisterKite]
    #2547540 - 04/11/04 12:50 AM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Kite,
It sounds to me like you put too much of your stock for personal hapiness into other people, and now that those people or person are/is not around, you have lost that holder and thus your hapiness. True hapiness does not come from other individuals, and a good relationship with another person is one in which both people are happy as individuals first, and together second. Search yourself for answers as to what, other than someone else, can make you happy, and stop at nothing to try and lift your spirit from such a bad, bad place.

Good luck, and try to stay positive.

-T


--------------------
The air is cut with cyanide.


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Offlineshaggy101
Male

Registered: 08/17/00
Posts: 1,816
Loc: ..still waiting for godot
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
Re: Giving up hope [Re: MisterKite]
    #2547577 - 04/11/04 01:04 AM (13 years, 1 month ago)

I know you right now
and I percieve you somewhat
I find it strange how sytematic this shit seems to go..
for me- quit my girl- quit drugs -lost hope.

The thing is even right now im still in the middle of a change..we are constantly changing but you can see things in phases..ya know?
when your the story its hard to watch yourself..you actually feel that fear..bare the sorrow

yet sometimes fate seems to throw you a bone..or maybe its just a glitch
..but every once and a while faith smacks me right in the head
and for that brief moment I remember
lives fly by my conscious mind..words to describe a deja vu
..a monk praying.. a city I have never seen before

I will sit and make music
to feel something real

ya maybe im crazy
the human mind is a powerful thing

but if it just so happens that in the end there was nothing to believe..
if faith itself is unfounded

then know that I will make it
for I am
and one day those words will penetrate my pride


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OfflineMisterKite
Stranger
Male User Gallery

Registered: 12/24/02
Posts: 655
Loc: Montreal, QC
Last seen: 9 years, 5 months
Re: Giving up hope [Re: TimeTraveler]
    #2547589 - 04/11/04 01:09 AM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Yea, i acknowledge that. Everything seems to orient on external factors rather than myself. I would like to change my attitude, but really how does one do such a thing?


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"But for the sake of some little mouthful of flesh we deprive a soul of the sun and light, and of that proportion of life and time it had been born into the world to enjoy."


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InvisibleGGreatOne234
Stranger
Registered: 12/24/99
Posts: 8,946
Re: Giving up hope [Re: MisterKite]
    #2548665 - 04/11/04 01:26 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Whyd you dump the girl?


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InvisibleJim
 User Gallery

Registered: 04/07/04
Posts: 20,898
Re: Giving up hope [Re: MisterKite]
    #2548752 - 04/11/04 03:56 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Sometimes our feelings can be so out there that it causes major depressive cycles. I go through them all the time, I am scizo-affective. It is really hard to wake up in the morning and get out of bed, because what is the point? You are going to only feel miserable all day so why not withdraw yourself from the community. I dont regularily say this, but your just depressed man. Try seeking proffesional help, and be willing to take the antidressants that they prescribe. You will feel a lot better, and in time you will be yourself again.


--------------------
Use the Fucking Reply To Feature You Lazy Pieces of Shit!

afoaf said:
Jim, if you were in my city, I would let you fuck my wife.


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InvisibleJim
 User Gallery

Registered: 04/07/04
Posts: 20,898
Re: Giving up hope [Re: MisterKite]
    #2548758 - 04/11/04 03:59 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

You really need to find a hobby, even if its something small. Busy work will keep your mind of the problem, although you will eventually have to deal with it down the road. Try reading some books by Carl Rogers. He was an early psychiatrist who developed the methods now used in treating depression. Dont give up, there is hope!


--------------------
Use the Fucking Reply To Feature You Lazy Pieces of Shit!

afoaf said:
Jim, if you were in my city, I would let you fuck my wife.


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OfflineHahzist
Surfing theWaves of Chaos

Registered: 02/15/04
Posts: 214
Last seen: 5 years, 4 months
Re: Giving up hope [Re: Jim]
    #2557108 - 04/13/04 11:37 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Sometimes solitary conefinement is the key I think. Time Traveler nailed it. You put too much emphasis on other people. You are going to have to learn to be content and happy with yourself, while others are not around. I'd try to spend a lot of time alone for a while. Try not to dwell on things too much. Just relax, chill out, watch some movies, listen to music, surf the web, go onto ebaumsworld and laugh at some shit. You'll come around, then you can share you happiness with other people :smile:

Everyone needs to be alone sometimes. I have a roommate who can be annoying sometimes. I mean being in a dorm I have to live with this kid alll the time. There really isnt much time to be alone. I like to go out and have fun, then come home and chill. But when I cant chill it causes a problem. Anyway, its not that bad :P, my point is being around people all the time isnt the answer.


Edited by Hahzist (04/13/04 11:54 PM)


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Offlinevalour
Swordbearer

Registered: 03/02/02
Posts: 1,453
Loc: USA
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: Giving up hope [Re: MisterKite]
    #2558622 - 04/14/04 12:06 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

MisterKite-
I've been there, too.
And honestly, it's time to build yourself up.
Oddly, part of your attitude will actually help-
don't focus on finding someone else.
Be the best person you can be. Focus on building your own life and your own strengths.
This is how you find the person who will be best suited for you int he long run ...ironically by not thinking about finding someone.

Don't give up -- life has so much promise ahead of you.
And it's ~your~ life - not someone else's.
(The other people said good things and I'm not saying anything new, but what you were saying sounded so familiar I felt I had to respond)


--------------------
"Remember, son,
I didn't sell out-
I bought in."


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Offlineenotake2
Stop Bush's war
 User Gallery

Registered: 01/30/03
Posts: 1,457
Loc: Comfy chair in my lounger...
Last seen: 5 years, 10 months
Re: Giving up hope [Re: MisterKite]
    #2562478 - 04/15/04 07:31 AM (13 years, 1 month ago)

I managed to get out of a period of depression using a book called 'learned optimisim' by Martin Seligman that helped me to totally change my attitude to things. The weird thing was everything in my life became really good, opportunity opened up for me, I met a new boyfriend, my relationships with my family improved, etc, when I became more positive. Like Carl Jung said - if you change the inside the outside will follow.


--------------------
Computer games don't affect kids. I mean if Pacman affected our generation as kids, we'd all be running around in a darkened room, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music.

"Being bitter and hateful is like drinking a vial of poison and hoping the other person gets sick" FreakQLibrium

"My motto from here on out is: If someone or something (including me) in my life is conducting themselves in such a way that they can be seen on Jerry Springer, it's time to take out the garbage!!! When you stop taking their behaviour personally and see their antics as a true reflection on their character, it becomes absolutely nauseating." Anon. on abusive relationships.


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Offlinevalour
Swordbearer

Registered: 03/02/02
Posts: 1,453
Loc: USA
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: Giving up hope [Re: enotake2]
    #2565831 - 04/15/04 10:50 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

I read that book as well and think it kicked ass.


--------------------
"Remember, son,
I didn't sell out-
I bought in."


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Offlineshaggy101
Male

Registered: 08/17/00
Posts: 1,816
Loc: ..still waiting for godot
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
Re: Giving up hope [Re: MisterKite]
    #2598518 - 04/24/04 06:11 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

hey kite
i dont know if or feeling better at all
..but I think enotake made the best point
think positive :sun: ..it really does work..just be patient..take in the spring.. and remember whatever is going on now it is still your world
and it can be beautiful
:heart:~as a man thinketh - so it is~:heart:


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OfflineUncleMike
Visionary
Male

Registered: 05/18/03
Posts: 964
Loc: S.W. Virginia
Last seen: 8 years, 5 months
Re: Giving up hope [Re: MisterKite]
    #2598861 - 04/24/04 09:40 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

NEVER GIVE UP HOPE if someome as selfish as me can find the right person then you can. You will know when that person comes along. You seem to be a very caring person but remember that it is okay to care about yourself. two is good but you can make it on your own until the right girl comes along.


--------------------
Live each day like it will be your last, tomorrow my never come.
SporeSmart


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