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InvisiblePapaverS
Madmin Emeritus?

Registered: 06/01/02
Posts: 26,880
Loc: Radio Free Tibet!
The Horror... The Horror...
    #2541707 - 04/09/04 01:14 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Actors Whip Easter Bunny at Church Show
Thu Apr 8,11:08 AM ET (Associated Press)

GLASSPORT, Pa. - First, the Passion of the Christ. Now, the torment of the Easter Bunny?

It may not have been as gruesome as Mel Gibson's movie, but many parents and children got upset when a church trying to teach about Jesus' crucifixion performed an Easter show with actors whipping the Easter bunny and breaking eggs.

People who attended Saturday's show at Glassport's memorial stadium quoted performers as saying, "There is no Easter bunny," and described the show as being a demonstration of how Jesus was crucified.

Melissa Salzmann, who brought her 4-year-old son J.T., said the program was inappropriate for young children. "He was crying and asking me why the bunny was being whipped," Salzmann said.

Patty Bickerton, the youth minister at Glassport Assembly of God, said the performance wasn't meant to be offensive. Bickerton portrayed the Easter rabbit and said she tried to act with a tone of irreverence.

"The program was for all ages, not just the kids. We wanted to convey that Easter is not just about the Easter bunny, it is about Jesus Christ," Bickerton said.

Performers broke eggs meant for an Easter egg hunt and also portrayed a drunken man and a self-mutilating woman, said Jennifer Norelli-Burke, another parent who saw the show in Glassport, a community about 10 miles southeast of Pittsburgh.

"It was very disturbing," Norelli-Burke said. "I could not believe what I saw. It wasn't anything I was expecting."




That's some seriously weird-ass shit! It sounds like one of those bizarre haunted houses where instead of hobgoblins and witches, they depict girls having abortions, homosexuals suffering from AIDS, and democrats giving away the panama canal... :smirk:

Oh well, I'm an optimist. I think the poor bunny will rise again, and ascend into bunny heaven -- which is just to the left of dog heaven! :laugh:


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Offlinekosmic_charlie
Truckin' in style
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Registered: 03/18/01
Posts: 5,202
Loc: Deep Elem
Last seen: 1 day, 22 hours
Re: The Horror... The Horror... [Re: Papaver]
    #2541738 - 04/09/04 01:24 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

What I want to know is what the hell does the Easter Bunny have to do with Jesus?  :smirk:

That is a crazy story though.  I would have walked out.  I remember a long time ago I was a kid with my parents in our Catholic church and all of a sudden these people started giving this pro life demonstration (with slides and everything) that the church had planned.  I remember my dad being very loud and saying, "You gotta be kidding me."  Then we walked out in the middle of it with all our neighbors and aquaintances watching us, judging us.  I didn't really comprehend what was going on at the time but looking back at it, I have a lot of respect for how my parents handled the situation.  And it's not that they're 100% pro abortion.  They're just against people shoving their views down the throats of others, which I think is a noble thing to take a stand against.


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Goin' where the water tastes like wine.


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Invisibleeric_the_red
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Registered: 02/28/03
Posts: 12,831
Loc: happy land
Re: The Horror... The Horror... [Re: Papaver]
    #2541785 - 04/09/04 01:35 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

the easter bunny was very distraught after being whipped on stage, humiliated in front of so many fans.

i hate to be the one to break the bad news, but e. bunny threw himself in front of a 1989 chevrolet lumina earlier today. the death was quick and painless. time of death is estimated to be 3:37 p.m. central time.

easter has been cancelled.

:crying:


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Anno cock? is that some kind of Greek liqueur? -Geo's All Knowing Sex Slave


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InvisiblePapaverS
Madmin Emeritus?

Registered: 06/01/02
Posts: 26,880
Loc: Radio Free Tibet!
Re: The Horror... The Horror... [Re: kosmic_charlie]
    #2541791 - 04/09/04 01:37 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

I?m worried about the poor Easter Bunny. No fun-loving anthropomorphic holiday character should have to be subjected to some medieval crucifixion reenactment at the hands of some post-millennial zealots... :frown:

I think I will make a pilgrimage to Pennsylvania and anoint the bunny?s wounds with marshmallow peeps! :laugh:



My Ride?s Here
Warren Zevon

I was staying at the Marriott
With Jesus and John Wayne
I was waiting for a chariot
They were waiting for a train
The sky was full of carrion
"I?ll take the mazuma"
Said Jesus to Marion
"That?s the 3:10 to Yuma
My ride?s here..."

The Houston sky was changeless
We galloped through bluebonnets
I was wrestling with an angel
You were working on a sonnet
You said, "I believe the seraphim
Will gather up my pinto
And carry us away, Jim
Across the San Jacinto
My ride?s here..."

Shelley and Keats were out in the street
And even Lord Byron was leaving for Greece
While back at the Hilton, last but not least
Milton was holding his sides
Saying, "You bravos had better be
ready to fight
Or we?ll never get out of East Texas tonight
The trail is long and the river is wide
And my ride?s here"

I was staying at the Westin
I was playing to a draw
When in walked Charlton Heston
With the Tablets of the Law
He said, "It?s still the Greatest Story"
I said, "Man, I?d like to stay
But I?m bound for glory
I?m on my way
My ride?s here..."


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InvisibleChe_Night_Soil
Koinoniphobic

Registered: 07/16/02
Posts: 1,533
Loc: Commonslaughtia
Re: The Horror... The Horror... [Re: Papaver]
    #2541800 - 04/09/04 01:39 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

...and is seated at the right hand of the Santa Clause. That's the funniest thing I've read in some time. Thanks, Papaver.


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if(human==autoPart){
for(i=1;i<infinity;i++){
getBorn(mind,soul);
getEdu(mind,soul);
getJob(mind,soul);
retire(mind,soul);
die(mind,soul);
}
}


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Offlinenotapillow
I want to be a fisherman
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Registered: 09/29/03
Posts: 31,116
Loc: A rare and different tune
Last seen: 11 days, 20 hours
Re: The Horror... The Horror... [Re: Che_Night_Soil]
    #2541815 - 04/09/04 01:44 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

im here  :shiftyeyes: :shiftyeyes: :shiftyeyes:.....
dont touch me!


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InvisibleChe_Night_Soil
Koinoniphobic

Registered: 07/16/02
Posts: 1,533
Loc: Commonslaughtia
Re: The Horror... The Horror... [Re: notapillow]
    #2541839 - 04/09/04 01:50 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

NRI


--------------------
if(human==autoPart){
for(i=1;i<infinity;i++){
getBorn(mind,soul);
getEdu(mind,soul);
getJob(mind,soul);
retire(mind,soul);
die(mind,soul);
}
}


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InvisiblePapaverS
Madmin Emeritus?

Registered: 06/01/02
Posts: 26,880
Loc: Radio Free Tibet!
Re: The Horror... The Horror... [Re: Che_Night_Soil]
    #2541886 - 04/09/04 02:02 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

I'm really very sorry for this, but I can resist:

Just when you thought it was safe to go back on an Easter egg hunt...

Pixar Animation Studios, and Lethal Weapon Productions present, the Second Greatest Story ever told...

Mel Gibson's "The Passion of the Bunny Wabbit!"

Starring the voices of: John Hurt, Peter O'Tool, Jeremy Irons, Meryl Streep, Madonna, Sting, and Introducing, Jay and Silent Bob as the Seraphim Peeps.

Shhh... Be very quiet... I'm hunting wabbit...


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InvisiblePapaverS
Madmin Emeritus?

Registered: 06/01/02
Posts: 26,880
Loc: Radio Free Tibet!
Re: The Horror... The Horror... [Re: Papaver]
    #2542094 - 04/09/04 03:19 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

Definitions to help understand Papaver's Strange Land of Easter Enchantment*...

Seraphim Peeps? - A special class of heavenly attendants, occupying the highest rank in the celestial hierarchy. They are six-winged, fire bearing, yellow marshmallow, serpentine, chicks, who function as attendants to God, punishers of the wicked, and protectors of the Easter Bunny (old testament) and the Chocolate Jesus (new testament)...

See also: Malted Cherubim.

*Mescaline is also helpful.

**I'm starting to think that maybe I should stop procrastinating with all this weirdness, and maybe get back to work, and actually get something accomplished tonight...


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Anonymous

Re: The Horror... The Horror... [Re: Papaver]
    #2542187 - 04/09/04 04:12 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)



:3rd_eye:


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InvisiblePapaverS
Madmin Emeritus?

Registered: 06/01/02
Posts: 26,880
Loc: Radio Free Tibet!
Re: The Horror... The Horror... [Re: Organic]
    #2542208 - 04/09/04 04:23 AM (12 years, 7 months ago)

There was this pile of little arms and legs...

"One through nine, no maybes, no supposes, no fractions. You can't travel in space, you can't go out into space, you know, without, like, you know, uh, with fractions -- what are you going to land on -- one-quarter, three-eighths? What are you going to do when you go from here to Venus or something? That's dialectic physics."

--An Anonymous Photojournalist in Cambodia


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