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oceanman
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Registered: 09/29/17
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Thought loop of thought loops
#25218084 - 05/21/18 06:47 AM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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So yesterday I thought it was good idea to experiment a little and instead of making a brew I capped 3,2g of MHRB powder along with 2g of Syrian Rue and got my ass kicked majorly.
It all started when around 30 minutes in,I felt that familliar feeling of dread and 'everything is meaningless' loop started to come.It first showed up after my 7,5g MHRB Anahuasca trip,only this time it was so much worse.
It was as if all my rationality was gone,I remember looking at clock and seconds ticking by,but me at that time though he is stuck here for eternity and it's everything there is and will be.
I started pacing around between the two rooms and each time getting deeper and deeper into their own respective delusions.I spare you the details but you know the saying how monkeys with typewriters, given enough time can write the works of Shakespeare?That's how this loop felt like-pure insanity at it's finest.
Finally,two hours later I came out from what seemed like 30 minutes of blackout and began to regain my rationality after I saw my clothes thrown everywhere and started thanking god for getting me out of this hell.
At least the final message of this trip was positive-if I'm here reincarnating for eternity the best I can do is to don't be so moody as to increase your suffering and try to live happily,and it really feels like I took this advice to heart.
I definitely won't be capping MHRB and probably won't be doing DMT anytime soon but I'm planning acid trip in the next few weeks,I hope after I learned the message this loop won't transfer over to my acid trip but just to be safe-what one can do if one can feel it come on so before it starts taking over you kick in it's metaphorical nuts ?
Edited by oceanman (05/21/18 06:51 AM)
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Enkidu
"No-Such-Person"
Registered: 07/09/16
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: oceanman]
#25218148 - 05/21/18 07:32 AM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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Bro I've been there. Sounds super similar to something I experienced and it was utter hell to me and I too was happy to be alive and back in reality and escape it once I did.
You'll start to feel better, I was recommended to lay off psyches for a while.
I wouldn't think a lower dose of L would cause it to reutrn but maybe just chill for a bit to be sure.
I say this because I actually haven't dosed again yet since I entered that same loop of hell may 2nd even though I want to dose some fucking L
But I feel like the advice I got to chill for a bit was good and I'll be ready to jump back on the horse soon when the time feels right.
My advice would be to be with friends and people you love someplace safe and it should help immensky if you do start going into that, which I would doubt L would cause but idk for sure
Welcome back to this plane of existnce, happy to have you here
-------------------- Within You , Without You
Edited by Enkidu (05/21/18 07:34 AM)
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oceanman
Stranger
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: Enkidu]
#25218164 - 05/21/18 07:44 AM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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Thanks man,I already was feeling way better after the trip had ended,it felt like that chapter has ended and another one began.
Looks like and still way too greeen for tryptamines,and yeah I definitely won't be hasty,I still got some things to think over
Edited by oceanman (05/21/18 07:45 AM)
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icetech
Registered: 08/21/17
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: oceanman]
#25218172 - 05/21/18 07:55 AM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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I don't think you are too green.. just why did you take so much?
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,062
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: oceanman]
#25218181 - 05/21/18 08:01 AM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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do you perceive a dose based relationship with the effects experienced, and are you interested in finding a good dose for your purposes?
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oceanman
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Quote:
icetech said: I don't think you are too green.. just why did you take so much?
Didn't think 3 grams would be this much,how wrong I was... Plants like MHRB are not to be fucked with
Quote:
redgreenvines said: do you perceive a dose based relationship with the effects experienced, and are you interested in finding a good dose for your purposes?
Nope,this time the trip was mostly mental while there are other times where I took 2,5g of MHRB brew and it was mostly visuals and very little mindfuck,this might be just a guess but maybe it was the NMT that made me go crazy
Edited by oceanman (05/21/18 08:29 AM)
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Icon
Bloomer
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: oceanman]
#25218460 - 05/21/18 10:50 AM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
oceanman said:
Quote:
icetech said: I don't think you are too green.. just why did you take so much?
Didn't think 3 grams would be this much,how wrong I was... Plants like MHRB are not to be fucked with
Quote:
redgreenvines said: do you perceive a dose based relationship with the effects experienced, and are you interested in finding a good dose for your purposes?
Nope,this time the trip was mostly mental while there are other times where I took 2,5g of MHRB brew and it was mostly visuals and very little mindfuck,this might be just a guess but maybe it was the NMT that made me go crazy
There's like no NMT in MHRB. Peganum harmala has 2 main alkaloids though, about 50/50 harmaline and harmine. Compared to Caapi vine's 100% harmine, peganum's harmaline can be a much darker tribulation. I got stuck in an intense looping experience off just 2g of shrooms and 2g of peganum.
It could have all been psychosomatic, but I think if you had to point a finger at one of the molecules, you'd most likely benefit from dropping the harmaline from peganum and future dosing with caapi or pure harmine.
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oceanman
Stranger
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: Icon]
#25218503 - 05/21/18 11:16 AM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Icon said:
There's like no NMT in MHRB. Peganum harmala has 2 main alkaloids though, about 50/50 harmaline and harmine. Compared to Caapi vine's 100% harmine, peganum's harmaline can be a much darker tribulation. I got stuck in an intense looping experience off just 2g of shrooms and 2g of peganum.
It could have all been psychosomatic, but I think if you had to point a finger at one of the molecules, you'd most likely benefit from dropping the harmaline from peganum and future dosing with caapi or pure harmine.
There is a lot of weird stuff besides the DMT in the whole bark,and me taking the powder whole,instead of brewing it, could have resulted in more of this stuff: https://www.dmt-nexus.me/forum/default.aspx?g=posts&t=27724
But you're right that for the most part it's psychosomatic,I just hope I moved past this loop
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Enkidu
"No-Such-Person"
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: oceanman]
#25218542 - 05/21/18 11:35 AM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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You will, you'll feel better and better as time progresses, trust
-------------------- Within You , Without You
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Citizen X
Buzz Killinton
Registered: 01/19/14
Posts: 7,853
Loc: Djibouti
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: Enkidu]
#25218553 - 05/21/18 11:40 AM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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I hope you’re right and there’s not an underlying problem like bi-polar
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Enkidu
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: Citizen X]
#25218565 - 05/21/18 11:48 AM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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When did you do it ?
Bro go check my trip report out if you want the 200g fresh tea one under trip reports.
I thought I had gone off the deep end never to return for about a week or so maybe a bit longer.
Was crying for no reason and thinking about desth a lot and crying myself to sleep some nights and thinking maybe I really fucked up my brain chemistry in a fucked up way.
Then I started feeling better than I ever have.
If you're smoking weed I would recommend giving it a break and just experience and feel everything sober.
Talked a an amazing dude on here Northerner who gave me amazing advice and assured me I would come out of it and slowly I did.
Try not to think about it much and just get out and enjoy nature, hangout with friends, take a break for a bit from the osyches and from smoking weed
Exercise and read some books.
Trust me man I felt fucking horrible and I was doing all the shit inlosted and more and nothing was pulling me out of that fucked up mind state, but it started to fade and I started to feel like me again.
You will be good man 100% no doubt about it.
Just chill and take a break from the osuchoactices and relax with family and friends and nature, gonoit and do some shit you don't normally do, visit some cool places you want to visit and haven't got around to if you can
You'll be good man, just takes a bit of time is all
-------------------- Within You , Without You
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Enkidu
"No-Such-Person"
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: Enkidu]
#25218568 - 05/21/18 11:51 AM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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Yeah I miss read that thinking it was op
Bro don't scare him with that shit wtf...
I was a tusllt scared I was suffering huge bi polar and probably it was. Waking up happy as fuck sad as fuck by the end of the day, took a break from all drugs and balanced out within a week or two feeling better than ever he is fine and will be fine end of story
-------------------- Within You , Without You
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oceanman
Stranger
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: Enkidu]
#25218582 - 05/21/18 12:04 PM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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I think I'm good now,when I first encoutered this loop,I was pretty unease about it and kept thinking for weeks about what happens when I die and now after I went through this I feel there nothing to fear but delusions that I'm projecting myself
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Enkidu
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Registered: 07/09/16
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: oceanman]
#25218584 - 05/21/18 12:05 PM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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I would recommend spending some time sober man
Smoking weed probably doesn't help
-------------------- Within You , Without You
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Enkidu
"No-Such-Person"
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: Enkidu]
#25218588 - 05/21/18 12:07 PM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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I smoked weed for like a week after my trip then quit then it was still rough for a couple days then finally started dating.
For me it definitely could have been quitting weed that helped. Alance me back out and clear my mind
-------------------- Within You , Without You
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Citizen X
Buzz Killinton
Registered: 01/19/14
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Loc: Djibouti
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: Enkidu]
#25218662 - 05/21/18 12:49 PM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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Enkidu
"No-Such-Person"
Registered: 07/09/16
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Re: Thought loop of thought loops [Re: Citizen X]
#25219205 - 05/21/18 05:59 PM (5 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Citizen X said:
-------------------- Within You , Without You
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