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OfflineWithinity
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Quick post/ advice *DELETED*
    #25208265 - 05/16/18 05:04 PM (2 years, 11 months ago)

Post deleted by Withinity

Reason for deletion: yo


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InvisibleFruitOfLife
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Re: Quick post/ advice [Re: Withinity]
    #25208637 - 05/16/18 08:07 PM (2 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Withinity said:
So like 4 months ago or so I pre wrote a post I wanted to post here in this section on a wordpad , I kind of forgot about it and later found out in an argument that my GF had found my message to you that was never delivered but the fact I am back here now after those 4 months writing a new message might be saying something.

In a relationship medium term now with a girl somewhat younger than me at 20 years old and we seem to fight alot. It's like we are in a deep relationship and both love each other but at the same time clash heads way to often for this to be considered a healthy relationship. Not sure what to do , we have plans for the future together and whatnot , on paper our interests are similar , both sexually attracted to each other etc but you know sometimes I just cant let things go nor can she which escalates.

I don't know whats my point but we live together and share all mutual friends , I really have no'one to talk to about this, we met each other in a foreign country in which we both still live.

To what point do you sacrifice yourself when being with another. So confused, what do you guys think from an outside perspective? I just want to be happy and so does she I am sure.



People either grow together or they grow apart. Sometimes a relationship has run it's course and it's time to move on. If you aren't happy then why would you stay in that relationship?

You should communicate with her more and ask her what ways you can improve to make her happy and then you explain to her what she needs to do in order to make you happy. If either one of you can't fulfill the others requests then I'd say it's time to move on so you can find someone who does make you happy.


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OfflinemndfreezeM
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Re: Quick post/ advice [Re: Withinity]
    #25208910 - 05/16/18 10:11 PM (2 years, 11 months ago)

Learning to properly communicate is key for relationship survival.  It's normal to go down different paths over time, do separate things, etc, but its not normal if you're fighting about it a lot (a LOT being the key word there) and if you're unhappy.  You need to be able to communicate the issues you are having, the feelings you have, and resolve them together as a couple and if you cannot, or she cannot, or you both cannot, then you probably should take a break and figure out what's really important to you. 

Since you are both young you can expect to go through quite a few major life changes and relationships don't often survive those.  One of the hardest things for me to learn how to do when I was in my 20's was properly learn how to communicate issues, and not just talk about it, but learn how to RESOLVE them.  Most people are too stubborn to ask for professional help, or think they have all the answers already and don't need it, but if you really WANT to make the relationship work, truly want it, then you might want to talk to her about all of this, then look into couples therapy. 

What you definitely don't want to do however is continue down the path you already have been.  Repeating the same fights, same patterns and letting the same things hold you back from growing as a person.


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Nothing says love like grannies prolapsed anus!

quote]Urb said:
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