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Offlinemitsukaikira
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Registered: 12/10/17
Posts: 1
Last seen: 3 years, 5 months
7g cubensis - I'm in the spirit world, asshole!
    #24838101 - 12/10/17 07:07 PM (3 years, 5 months ago)

disclaimer: this is my 3rd mushroom journey. never anything more than 3.5g before. i wanted a heroic journey to experience some healing and personal insight. i got it.

1115a - 2 capsules of lion's mane mushroom, 100mg niacin, and 7 grams of psilocybe cubensis, ground in a weed grinder and made into a tea with a bag of twining's english breakfast tea, sweetened with honey. N and i stood in his kitchen, slowly drinking our tea. i was accepting a covenant with an ancient consciousness and treated it with reverence(we chose to consume the mushrooms as well. this felt important to fulfill the covenant). i thanked the mushrooms for imparting their wisdom to me and thanked the earth for providing the mushrooms. with each sip i could feel an expansiveness waiting to happen.

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1145a - the first signs of the oncoming ride were visual distortions on the wall and curtain over the couch. they began breathing and warping. as i was realizing this the effect hit very hard. i began to see fractal patterns at the tips of the tree branches outside the window. the walls were coloring themselves purple and shades of green began dripping from the ceiling. the body high started to hit as well and i began to feel unstable on my feet. immediately i needed familiarity. i asked N to put modern family on hulu so I could anchor to a tv show. this was not a good idea as you'll see why later. i began to feel a serious anxiety and realization that i could not stop what was about to happen. i did my best to accept it yet i became scared. the oppressive nature of an unfamiliar environment coupled with N having a very serious ride himself made it difficult. not a "bad trip". a fantastic trip with terrifying components. it was around this time where i remember losing coherent thought. i wasn't thinking in the normal sense. i was sensing and reacting to the environment in a way that i can hardly explain. as though i was reacting to changes on a subconsious level so deep i didn't know existed. i remember walking to the window and seeing a knife in the sink. a feeling of absolute terror overwhelmed me at the sight of it and i stood looking at it. eventually the fear subsided and a feeling of cold began to creep in. i returned to the couch and sat down. i noticed a blanket on the bed that N was on so i got up to gather it. the pattern was small cubes, inside larger cubes, nested 3 times. as i was unfolding it, the texture and pattern was flowing in such a way that the blanket had become infinite. like a moebius strip, as i was unfolding the blanket, it kept making more of itself. i was delighted at this and laughed and began to cover myself with the eternity that was the blanket. i became immediately warm and comfortable.

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1230p - ranger, the dog, was with us. he's old and is probably the most sage being i've ever met. i was in the grip of the come up and i was sprawled out on the couch, with ranger on the bed in front of me, between N's legs. i was overtaken with a desire to talk to ranger because he was looking at me like he could tell i was letting the mycelium do its thing. i got up and went to ranger, he watched me the whole time. eye contact. i began to pet him, down his head and his body. he had a look of pure bliss on his face. i looked deeply into his eyes and ranger became charlie, N's recently passed beagle. as the realization of that set in, he became kilo. my cat who left the world years ago. in the moments of connecting with ranger, i felt as though i was speaking to every deceased pet i have ever known. they passed knowledge to me that death is not the end. at this point, N had stirred and moved to the other side of the bed. later he said he had come to and saw ranger and i and felt that it was such a powerful personal experience between the dog and i that he had to leave the area. i thanked ranger for his insight, and thanked charlie and kilo for their visit, and returned to the couch feeling such a feeling of oneness and warmth with everything.

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time did not exist - the tv was playing modern family, the latest season. the screen was varying colors of purple and blue, wavering and melting into each other. i could sense colors based on whoever was on the screen. mitchell was yellow (i remember yelling out loud "it's because he's gay!!"), cam was a weird pasty white. claire was green. phil was orange. jay was beige, gloria colored everything black.

there were subtitles on the screen and i could not read the words. they were yellow and had sparkling lights around them. i could not understand english so the words were meaningless gibberish but the tones came through in strange pulses of color and emotion. anytime mitch was on tv, i laughed because yellow was funny. cam made me want to not look at him, i don't quite know why. jay filled me with a sense of warmth. gloria filled me with a sense of dread and fear so intense i could barely deal with it. everything she "said" was screeching, sharp, piercing, and seemed aimed directly at my ego. it sounded like knives. she was killing me and i couldn't stop it.

i tried to curl into a ball in the couch in order to hide only to be greeted with the INSANE urge to close my eyes. i did so and began sinking into the couch. things became black and sound became muffled. deeper and deeper i went. no light, no sound. i was entombed in the universe. nothing was anywhere. i had no body, there was no me. i don't know if i died but i left me. it felt like this took an eternity yet it was only every time gloria was on screen. whenever the tv would change scenes, i would be violently ripped from my death to awaken on the couch, awaiting the next scene. i don't remember how long this went on or how many times it happened but i do know we looped the entire season about 3 times throughout the day.

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Awe-struck Before The Wall Of Mathematics - i do not remember how or why this occurred nor do i know if this is even the proper placement yet it must be noted. i was thrust in front of an infinite stone wall, stretching as high as forever and as wide as eternity. the texture was of stone, like a castle wall. on the wall were etched, deeply, in some kind of red dye, algebraic equasions as far as i could see. they had a glow to them. i felt such a sense of awe and power from the wall. as if i could decode the mathematics i would understand all things. i felt so small and insignificant with the endless nature of existence all around me, and yet i had a very strong sense of individuality. i feel that the mushrooms showed me some mathematics of existence. whether it be the mathematics behind everything or just myself, i was shown something. i feel more and more i was shown the mathematical structure of myself and if i could work it out i can figure out my life.

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sometime in the spirit world - my cell phone was on the couch next to me and i noticed a small green light blinking on it. i had a message. i picked up my phone and did not remember how to use it. i looked at it and thought "huh it sure is flat" and then i must have hit the unlock button because the screen exploded in a shower of sparks and colored light that was absolutely enthralling. tracers of sparks and lights followed my fingers as i touched the screen. i could not remember my unlock code, which was probably a good thing. i felt almost like an intelligence from the screen as if i was following the sparks instead of them following my finger. i'm not sure at all how long this went on.

i had a monster ultra fuel on the bookshelf next to me. i told myself i would want to taste it while on my journey. i turned to grab the can and saw it so clearly, like it was a cutout, springing out of a pop-up book. i touched it and it was more real than anything else in the room. there was an ethereal glow around it, white and cold. the ingredient list was dancing around in a rainbow of lights and made no sense at all. a faint light was coming from the open top and i knew i had to drink it. i recall bright tastes, vivid silvery tastes and a revitalization beyond simple caffeine. i put the monster back down and turned away. i have no memory of what happened after this.

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2-230p? - sometime after the peak and on the plateau i remember seeing my hair in front of my face. it was fractal and looked like the veining in a leaf. then i thought "it looks more like mycelium" and i knew i was right. i could immediately see my hair as mycelium reaching down to my beard, which was more mycelium, drawn to my arms and legs, covered in more mycelium until it reached the floor and connected to the earth. this is why the movie avatar and the idea of eywa is powerful to me.

-------------------------

330-baseline - the visuals are beginning to ebb slightly. the colors are less bright and understanding of external english is coming back to me. as i realize i can understand the television i begin to wonder how i was even understanding myself, if i was thinking in english or simply perceiving things on a subconsious level. i still don't know. at this point N has become fairly lucid and we begin to attempt conversation.

N - bro
me - bro
N - yeah
me - yeah

even though we had our own very personal and very seperate journeys, we didn't feel like we had to share much. we understood. a slow comedown where television was funny, the colors were present yet fading and a feeling of ...not peacefulness but being at peace washed over me. i looked over at N and he had the same look of feeling on his face and we just grinned at each other.

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mushrooms are VERY powerful. VERY spiritual, and extremely ancient. you are not just imbibing a drug, or eating a mushroom, or taking a trip. you're interfacing with another consciousness and you must treat it with proper reverence. i went into this with the mindset of a shaman, reaching out to a cosmic consiousness. i wanted to learn something from the mushrooms and i think they tried with the Wall of Mathematics.

i have another 7g in a mason jar waiting to offer its connection to me again.


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Mushrooms, Mycology and Psychedelics >> The Psychedelic Experience >> Trip Reports

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