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OfflineSalviaD
Rasta
Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 147
Loc: Portsmouth, VA
Last seen: 8 years, 11 months
No more meds. But everything still kinda pulses and moves??
    #2446668 - 03/18/04 12:09 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

After reading Tasty_Smurf_House's post on BiPolar I thought i'd post my experiences with this and also ask a few questions.

First of all this all started when I was 16 and a pretty big drug dealer in my area, If you went to my High School and you bought weed you prob. bought it from me sorta thing. Because of the large access of herb I had I Honestly would smoke a Q to a 1/2O of mids to myself ea. day in bucket drops and bong hits. From the minute I woke i would start taking BD's, and I would take my bong along with me to school where let's just say i took a LOT of bathroom breaks throughout the day. At this point in time I was living what was the best time of my life. Pretty much a year long party.

Then my best friend at the time told me about salvia divinorium. He would buy like QP's make a large amount of extract and then we would sell a lot of it to people who had heard the rumors spread by my friend around school about this new drug that was a complete mind fuck. Well just to shorten this story up I got rich and he got richer, as i was more of a tag-along on this salvia venture. And i ended up doing salvia a couple times a day since shit it was free.

I ended up going to a psychiatrist and all this shit after my mom caught me doing drugs like 3 times within 2 months (my mom is as straight edge as straight edge can be, doesn't drink, drug, smoke cigarettes etc.)and because my dad is BiPolar, manac-depressive, and schitzophrenic,sp? i was immediately diagnosed as such myself, and i was the most chillenest guys i know and this pissed me off but not as much as when the dumbfuck doctor who didn't know what salvia was pulled a book out, and laughed at me. And told me and i quote, "Why would you pretend to get high off of Salvia, If you were to smoke it all the alkaloid properties that would cause the trip would be bunrt away and you wouldn't even be able to get high" and this shit set me off and i cussed him out and left.

About an hour had passed and i was in my room still pissed playing some PS2 when i saw Police start pulling up so naturally i go to the window thinking damn somebody's in trouble. Then more police pull up and it ened up being like 5 cars 2 heads ea. and then they all started walking to my house so i was like oh shit I"M IN TROUBLE!!! Then once they get in my house they rushed me, I was put in a headlock of some sort then another cop grabbed my legs then they just dove on me, driving me face first into the concrete while i had my hands behind my back. (now maybe you can understand why i fuckin hate cops) Apparently the psychiatrist had called the police on me saying i was an immediate threat to myself and all others. So the police didn't even try to talk to me just tackled the shit out of me, a 16 year old kid. WTF is wrong with that picture. Then they put me in the back of the car and called my psychiatrist of one appointment to see what to do and he told the cops "nevermind he's ok" then the police cussed him out and told me he was a "dumb fucking asshole" and let me go.

Within the end of the month same shit happend and the person at the hospital told me "she was a hippie and it took her 7 years to discover the evils of marijuana(so obviously she was a shitty hippie IMO) and she thought that if i spent the night in the psychiatric hospital maybe i would learn this lesson sooner. Of course my mom would agree.

WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF REASONING WAS IT TO LOCK A RECREATIONAL POT SMOKER UP IN A PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL JUST FOR THE LIFE EXPERIENCE!!!

Well damnit i wasn't gonna have it so i escaped and then like a day latter i was arrested and taken back to the hospital where i was forced to take a shit load of pills. I just turned 18 November 27th 2003 and over the year and a half untill then i took Depakote, Zoloft, Wellbutrin, Zyprexa and for sleep Remeron and Clonidine. And my choices where take them or live on the street so i just took the pills, which IMO fucked me up worse than the drugs i was taking in the first place. After taking all these pills i would have this slight trippy sorta feeling. Things would kinda move around a bit and shit and now that it's been since November 27th the day i turned 18 since i've taken any of this shit I STILL GET THAT TRIPPY FEELING AND SOMETINES THINGS KIND OF PULSE AND MOVE AROUND AND SINCE IT"S BEEN 4 GOING ON 5 MONTHS AND THAT SHIT AIN"T STOPPED I"M GETTING WORRIED. DID THE PILLS FUCK ME UP OR IS THIS FROM THE SALVIA?????? AND WHAT IS IT??????

I've gone back to being a pot head again but I try to keep my priorities straight like school before pot and such. I don't smoke before i go to school anymore. I still get a little depressed everynow and then but for the most part i'm back to my old self 50% of the time, depressed maybe 10-15% and just there kinda of feeling 35-40% But the more i smoke weed the more i go back to being my old normal don't give a fuck out to have a good ass time self and the depressed feeling stays away for longer. I will NEVER go back to the psychiatrist just from all the shit i've been through because of them. Back then i did drugs to have a good time and I know that salvia just isn't the drug for that. Then i read all the stuff about like "lady salvia" and how plants have spirits and shit and i mean i've never really believed stuff like that but i do think about the what if... what if that was true then i'm pretty sure the way i treated salvia in the past would definately have pissed that spirit off... Wow i think i just typed a fuckin novel sorry if it's too long and nobody reads it but if you do i put my question in all caps so maybe you could atleast read that part. Well thanks. Atleast i got to get some of that shit off my chest that was pissing me off. I believe i've needed to vent about this shit for awhile. peace.............


Edited by SalviaD (03/18/04 12:31 PM)


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Offlineshaggy101
Male

Registered: 08/17/00
Posts: 1,816
Loc: ..still waiting for godot
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
Re: No more meds. But everything still kinda pulses and moves?? [Re: SalviaD]
    #2446675 - 03/18/04 12:11 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

heh man, I will read this later either way, but is there any way you could divide it into paragraphs or somethin?


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OfflineSalviaD
Rasta
Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 147
Loc: Portsmouth, VA
Last seen: 8 years, 11 months
Re: No more meds. But everything still kinda pulses and moves?? [Re: shaggy101]
    #2446706 - 03/18/04 12:23 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

sorry just started typing to be honest once i started venting i had no idea i even typed half of that. peace....


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OfflineThe_Red_Crayon
Exposer of Truth
Male User Gallery

Registered: 08/13/03
Posts: 13,673
Loc: Smokey Mtns. TN Flag
Last seen: 4 months, 12 days
Re: No more meds. But everything still kinda pulses and moves?? [Re: SalviaD]
    #2447657 - 03/18/04 05:00 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Depakote, Zoloft, Wellbutrin, Zyprexa Clonidine.

All nasty drugs with nasty sideeffects. I took depakote,wellbutrin,risperdone for 3 years. It made me a basket case most of the time and i gained 80 pounds. When i quit those drugs it felt like a burden was lifted off me. Quit that shit and go to a real doctor and not a quack psychiatrist whose just o ut to prescribe and diagnose to whatever fits in the category.

If you are bipolar. Try to find a drug that works well with you with a minimum amount of side effects. I take Geodon (Ziprasidone) and Doxepin. Both work with me very well. No side effects no weight gain and best of all im not a loony anymore.


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OfflineThe_Red_Crayon
Exposer of Truth
Male User Gallery

Registered: 08/13/03
Posts: 13,673
Loc: Smokey Mtns. TN Flag
Last seen: 4 months, 12 days
Re: No more meds. But everything still kinda pulses and moves?? [Re: SalviaD]
    #2447659 - 03/18/04 05:00 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Depakote, Zoloft, Wellbutrin, Zyprexa Clonidine.

All nasty drugs with nasty sideeffects. I took depakote,wellbutrin,risperdone for 3 years. It made me a basket case most of the time and i gained 80 pounds. When i quit those drugs it felt like a burden was lifted off me. Quit that shit and go to a real doctor and not a quack psychiatrist whose just o ut to prescribe and diagnose to whatever fits in the category.

If you are bipolar. Try to find a drug that works well with you with a minimum amount of side effects. I take Geodon (Ziprasidone) and Doxepin. Both work with me very well. No side effects no weight gain and best of all im not a loony anymore.


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OfflineSalviaD
Rasta
Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 147
Loc: Portsmouth, VA
Last seen: 8 years, 11 months
Re: No more meds. But everything still kinda pulses and moves?? [Re: The_Red_Crayon]
    #2447768 - 03/18/04 05:26 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

honestly i'm pretty sure the Wellbutrin fucked me up the most. I hated that shit. I don't really care to ever go back to the pyschiatrist because with my dad's history every one i've been too has just immediately diagnosed me as having the exact shit as him. But IMO he's just crazy cause of the way he was raised, one example off the top of my head would be he told me when he was 8 and his dad was drunk as shit AGAIN, beating his mom AGAIN, and he stood up to him and he told me my grandpa gave my dad a gun and told him to kill him and shit. I mean i could see how that would fuck you up, and seeing the way he acts and shit i can say i'm nothing like him, and the drs. are just too damn eager to prescribe shit. peace....and thanks for taking the time to read and respond, i know it was long.


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Invisiblebert
bodhi

Registered: 10/14/02
Posts: 2,819
Loc: state
Re: No more meds. But everything still kinda pulses and moves?? [Re: SalviaD]
    #2448055 - 03/18/04 06:09 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

Wow, you've had an extremely fucked up life and family. I think if I were you I would have lost my mind. You need to move out of that house as fast as you can, it's not a healthy way to live. Also, if I were you I would quit the weed for now and save up money so you can become independent. Unless you get free weed or something.


--------------------
Persons denying the existence of robots may be robots themselves.


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OfflineSalviaD
Rasta
Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 147
Loc: Portsmouth, VA
Last seen: 8 years, 11 months
Re: No more meds. But everything still kinda pulses and moves?? [Re: bert]
    #2448230 - 03/18/04 06:50 PM (12 years, 8 months ago)

ya I'm tryin hard. My friend told me i could move with him to L.A. monday which is ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE COUNTRY. I would love to go and just start over and leave all this shit behind me but i would have to drop out of school to go. And since i've only got like 3 months left i just can't do it. But he told me he'd give me his # and i could come at the end of the school year, but i agree that getting the fuck out of this house will solve hella lot of my problems. peace.......


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Offlineshaggy101
Male

Registered: 08/17/00
Posts: 1,816
Loc: ..still waiting for godot
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
Re: No more meds. But everything still kinda pulses and moves?? [Re: SalviaD]
    #2449745 - 03/19/04 01:09 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

First of all you come across as a intelligent cool dude, whatever the past I hope you can see how bright you future can be.
I am not shocked at the way you have been treated, but I should be.  That is just how it is man.. the world is indeed a fucked up place.
I am however fairly pissed you were given that altimatum(sp?) about those drugs.. fuck man thats harsh.

Anyway I hope you stick around and read, learn what you need, and teach what you got.
I am one of those people who believe in spirit plants :wink:
peace and shroomyness


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Offlinegnrm23
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 08/30/99
Posts: 6,481
Loc: n. e. OH, USSA
Last seen: 2 months, 23 days
Re: No more meds. But everything still kinda pulses and moves?? [Re: SalviaD]
    #2450989 - 03/19/04 10:26 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

well....
the persistent visual distrotions could be a sign of SOME sort of HPPD or evoked schizophrenia or some such...

if you can find a copy of abram hoffer's _megavitamin therapy_ or his _vitamin b3 & schizophrenia_ , there is a simplified version of the HOD (hoffer-osmond diagnnostic) which can give you (and a trained mental health professional) an idea of "how fukd up" you are merely by answering a bunch of T/F dealies about perception & ideation...
dr hoffer's (disputed, but in some corners strongly supported) method of treating many forms of mental illnes is to combine traditonal therapies with large doses of vitamins & nutrients, especially niacin and/or niacinamide...

(just as an experiment, go the the pharmacy of healthfood store & spent $3 on some niacinamide & pop a few hundren mg per day (in divied doses w/food) & see if the visual effects go away after a few days; & then maybe see if they come back if you stop taking the vitamin...)

YMMV


--------------------
old enough to know better
not old enough to care


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OfflineSalviaD
Rasta
Registered: 02/13/04
Posts: 147
Loc: Portsmouth, VA
Last seen: 8 years, 11 months
Re: No more meds. But everything still kinda pulses and moves?? [Re: gnrm23]
    #2451134 - 03/19/04 11:21 AM (12 years, 8 months ago)

I was thinking it was possibly HPPD from the salvia but just not nearly as severe as it could be, but i honestly don't think that this started to happen untill i started taking all those damn pills. And i was allways just like fuck it, it will stop as soon as i turn 18 and quit taking all this medicine. Well i turned 18, stopped taking the meds. and it hasn't stopped yet and it's been allmost 5 months.

gnrm23 i will look into that t/f test and the vitamins and stuff and see if that can't help me out a bit.

and shaggy101 ya i was pretty pissed too when i was forced to take that shit. And i do believe that the majority of my problems will fade if not leave once i leave this house. peace....


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