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OfflineDmt-cracker
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Registered: 05/05/16
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Last seen: 6 years, 11 months
LSD ego death
    #24199556 - 03/28/17 11:45 AM (7 years, 2 days ago)

Acid trip report.

I want to start this by saying it's impossible to tell dosage blotter to blotter. This trip is from the same ten strip where a full tab was fun mild visuals and a slight change in head space, nothing to substantial. However, another tab from the same strip was way higher dosed then the rest and resulted in a full ego death experience.

I will try to collect the pieces of the trip together the best I can while it's still fresh in my mind (hour 11:30 of trip) I dosed at 10pm and planned for a normal night of rethinking a few things in life and just kick back for a pretty nice going trip. I turn on some Simpsons and feel the come up, nice and warm with tons of euphoria I cannot stop smiling and feeling like a little kid. After a few episodes I notice I can't keep track of the plot anymore which was the first clue something was wrong since this has never happened before. I try to watch but the open eye visuals become too much. Every word spoken falls onto me and each characters faces blend and melt into my own walls. This is when I knew I was in for a long night. I turned off the Simpsons and decided to listen to music in the darkness.

(11-12:00?) Cannot tell where walls begin and end do to everything being comprised of swirls and black holes. I look at my hands and they swirl into the chaos of colors and become invisible at times due to the intense visuals. I try to walk to my back door (a few steps away from my bed)  to get some fresh air as I feel anxiety building up but each step felt impossible. I felt like I was a cup of water balancing on a tight rope trying not to spill over and completely lose myself. I manage to get back into bed and feel what I think is the peak hit me.

This is where I lose complete sense of self and where I am. My entire vision at this point is 6 gear teeth and within each one the complexity of the world that seemed to hold itself higher than myself and I felt excluded from the main stream of energy that was the new version of life. I felt like a worm trying to find the last bit of warmth and comfort left in the world but only went deeper into patterns of uncomfort and a sense of longing for my own place in the world.

I exit the peak and feel the wave leaving. In this time I realize just how hard I am tripping and trying to calm myself down and talk my way through it. (It's only a drug, I did this to myself, sometimes you need to get the shit beaten out of you to learn.. etc) 

I try lighting some sage to calm myself but once I lit a lighter it looked more like a wild fire and my hand being of godly proportions. I now have a lit bundle of sage and the realization that I'm tripping way to hard to be responsible for embers so I try my best to put them out.

I feel the wave picking back up again so I buckle in. This time I had to except my own death before I could pass through the wave. (Realizing that if I let go my heart will stop beating while the rational side of me knows that no one's died from acid)

I saw a drooping door and remember thinking that it was a beautiful practical joke that all reality had to be compressed through this door and that it was rather inconvenient for the door to handle. Why was this door the chosen one? Why would we put that much responsibility on a door? Whos poor management skills allowed this to happen? I have a few more waves like this that are met with bits of laughter afterwards because I'm relieved to have fought my way through another. Feeling stronger and more confident each time!

I decide to plop myself onto the floor so I could really spread deep into my surroundings. I feel the worst of the trip is behind me but I still have intense visuals and have waves where I completely lose myself.
I scramble onto my phone and navigate my way to icaros chants (easier said than done when things are sliding around everywhere on the screen, good thing I know my phone enough)

These chants are what brought my entire trip around and grounded me. I felt protected and more sober than ever but with a ton of open eye visuals. I was ok with this because I found myself and my sober mindset I previously felt so detached from.


All in all it was a very intense but good (terrifying)  trip. I am certain now that I will only use acid to microdose from now on.
This was a great reminder that you never know how much is on a tab and how you'll react. Set and setting!

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InvisibleChakanooga
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Registered: 04/24/15
Posts: 2,710
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Re: LSD ego death [Re: Dmt-cracker]
    #24221997 - 04/06/17 01:42 AM (6 years, 11 months ago)

Sounds like it hit you pretty hard.

Nothing too wicked, sounded like a decently good trip ull def think back on.


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