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Offlinegranglegrog
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Registered: 01/20/17
Posts: 2
Last seen: 6 years, 11 months
MOM JEANS DEMON - Recurring difficult LSD Trip
    #24026149 - 01/20/17 04:25 PM (7 years, 10 days ago)

Hi there, first time poster here! I’ve been an avid user of psychedelics over the last ten years and have tripped 50+ times on mushrooms, LSD, MDMA, etc. I just wanted to share one of the more difficult and maddening phenomena that I encounter from time to time exclusively on LSD, and see if anyone has had any kind of similar experience or any advice for navigating this territory.

So the first time this happened I was 17, and it was my first real acid trip. Having previously only done a very light dose, a friend and I decided to dive in with 3 and a half tabs (~350mcg). The trip was absolutely life changing and euphoric for the first 6 or 7 hours, then when the sun went down I started having a strange sort of looping sensation in my thoughts where a repetitive string of nonsense syllables would latch on to them and prevent them from completing. This persisted for perhaps a half hour or so and was pretty scary for the duration, but it luckily subsided and I rode out the rest of the trip smoothly.

Fast forward to college, having done LSD perhaps 8 more times between the initial incident and this specific trip, I dosed ~200mcg on an empty stomach with a friend alone in his apartment, planning to listen to music, watch videos, etc for the afternoon, I.E. a fairly introspective yet not truly solo trip. After we dosed we put on the Animal Collective “movie” ODDSAC, which is essentially 45 minutes of chaotic psychedelic visuals and noise interspersed with songs laid over surreal scenes of people with weird masks on in nature. Within 25m I was certifiably high as fuck. I knew from previous experiences that was extremely fast for an onset and was immediately very uncomfortable with the speed at which this had happened. By the time the movie ended I was absolutely overwhelmed by the sensation I have described in the previous paragraph but this time it was amplified ten-fold. It felt like every single thought, every single thing I heard, every thing I saw, had taken on this characteristic of a loop or phrase that could not quite complete itself, becoming truncated right before its completion, and thus totally avoiding description. The “words” had a character of being extremely silly, mocking, and childish, sinisterly coy in their evasion of my description. My ego was utterly drowning in this internal cacophony as my language center disintegrated into chaos. I didn’t express this to my trip partner as I had a strange fear it would make it worse, and I was fairly convinced I was going to spend the rest of my days sputtering in a mental hospital. Of course, the feeling gradually faded over the next 8 hours, but I was left shaken, and was much more cautious about LSD over the next little while.

Fast forward another 4 or so years to 2015, having done acid perhaps another 15 times with no incident, I was living in NYC with some friends who kept a vial of LSD in the fridge, and were very into the idea of solo, intentional trips, having achieved fantastic personal results themselves. I set out to do the same one bright summer day, I woke up, went to yoga, meditated in the morning, and was in a very good state of mind. I dosed what I thought was 3 drops from the vial, but in hindsight was probably closer to 5, likely ~600mcg due to my own carelessness. The onset of this trip was even faster than my previous encounter, I could not even finish the small pile of dishes I had set out to do immediately after dosing before I felt deeply unsettled and needed to go lie down. Immediately I was feeling shooting spasms of tingling energy through my bones and was tripping very hard. I had a playlist made of mostly classical music and reliably, within a few songs, the maddening looping non-words started to attach themselves to the music and thus my thoughts. I spent the next eight hours wrestling with what I have come to call the “Mom Jeans Demon”, as for some reason the characteristic of its mocking tendencies reminds me of cheesy 90’s sitcoms. As the feeling intensified the hallucination seemed to take on an almost physical manifestation, it almost felt like an entity trying to communicate/harass me from another dimension. I had somewhat of a sense that it was like an object in space that I could observe from different angles, however maddening it was. During this trip I tried everything, fighting, letting go, submitting to ego-death, meditating, and nothing could deter the demon. For one brief moment the hallucinations finally coalesced and I seemed to break into what could only be described as heartrendingly beautiful ultimate reality, before collapsing into madness again for another 5 hours, with the symptoms gradually tapering off.

Since that trip I have had one more full blown encounter with the Mom Jeans Demon in practically the same setting albeit with a lower dose, and one slight encounter at the end of a long trip at Burning Man while trying to fall asleep. The only variable’s that I can tell contribute to this happening or not seem to be that it happens when the trip is much more introspective/inactive. I have had acid trips at festivals in between this one that were extremely pleasurable and more what I expect from LSD. Despite the absolute terror of these experiences, the most intense one seemed to be teaching me a lesson to truly pay attention to everything in my life, and that I can never escape myself, which are both lessons I cherish deeply.

ANYWAYS, wondering if anyone has personally experienced or heard of this phenomena or anything like it, and if you have any idea how one may deal with it in the future!

BE GOOD


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