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Anonymous #1

How to broach topic of friend's SO
    #24014462 - 01/16/17 11:54 AM (7 years, 14 days ago)

This is tricky.

It all happened so quick, engagement and a child within 18 months.

They say love is blind. It sure is.

Any kind of mild citicism won't be taken well, so broaching a bigger complaint might mean the end of a friendship.

Everyone changes, but not always for the better.


Without going into detail, can anyone shed some light on such a situation?

Been there?

This isn't about her being a wanderer or a cheat, more about her not liking a lot of people and changing a good guy into someone who drops legitimately good people because of her.

She can be nice but there is something essentially mean about her and she wishes violence on a lot of people, good people who are simply dealing with their own lives.


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Offlinegoldcaphunter
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Registered: 07/29/12
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Re: How to broach topic of friend's SO [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #24014487 - 01/16/17 12:04 PM (7 years, 14 days ago)

Mind your own business. As hard/harsh as it sounds. If you really want the best for this person it's best to let them do what they are going to do and be there for them if they need you, even if vice versa isn't true. Karma will reward you eventually, maybe not directly or in a way you want, but it will.


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Anonymous #1

Re: How to broach topic of friend's SO [Re: goldcaphunter]
    #24016473 - 01/17/17 02:42 AM (7 years, 13 days ago)

Quote:

goldcaphunter said:
Mind your own business. As hard/harsh as it sounds. If you really want the best for this person it's best to let them do what they are going to do and be there for them if they need you, even if vice versa isn't true. Karma will reward you eventually, maybe not directly or in a way you want, but it will.




I'm taking about real things here, not just romantic universal justice.

I feel like ten years are going to go by and he'll ask me did I see any warning signs.

Of course I saw warning signs but if I had told you you wouldn't have believed me?


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Anonymous #2

Re: How to broach topic of friend's SO [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #24016479 - 01/17/17 02:57 AM (7 years, 13 days ago)

Dont try and mess with their relationship or youll regret it


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Offlinedemekinfish
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Re: How to broach topic of friend's SO [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #24016486 - 01/17/17 03:10 AM (7 years, 13 days ago)

I've seen this before, gold has it right. If you say anything he will back his wife and look badly on you. If he doesn't see it himself, you telling him won't help anything. If you value your friendship be prepared to be there for him when the stuff hits the fan.


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InvisibleJokeshopbeard
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Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: How to broach topic of friend's SO [Re: demekinfish]
    #24016530 - 01/17/17 04:26 AM (7 years, 13 days ago)

Quote:

demekinfish said:
I've seen this before, gold has it right. If you say anything he will back his wife and look badly on you. If he doesn't see it himself, you telling him won't help anything. If you value your friendship be prepared to be there for him when the stuff hits the fan.



Another vote on this advice from me. I've been there OP, a few times, and IMO there's literally fuck all you can do, and anything you do do, won't go down well and will just create distance between you and your mate.

As has been said a few times, the best thing you can do is just be there for your pal, and move on if he leaves you behind for this girl.

Life = shit happens.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


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