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Lobi
Bushido



Registered: 02/06/16
Posts: 1,231
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 4 months, 29 days
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Best Friend Over Did The Coke last night (story/advice pls) 1
#24011894 - 01/15/17 11:05 AM (7 years, 15 days ago) |
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My best friend Zachary since the 5th grade gave me a call this morning asking him to give him a ride from the ER to his place at about 5am. Luckily I was up anyway to take my girl to work. All he told me on the phone was that he "Fucked up with the drugs" and if I could get him.
Zach told me as i drove him home that last week he had experienced a vomit and seizure type fit when he was drinking rum and doing the cocaines. last night was the same only 10x worse and his body also went numb. he told me it took a lot of power to not black out. His room mate called the Paramedics and i guess the sheriff didnt say much to him about anything. Zach could not express enough how embarrassed and stupid he felt. His father just had a heart attack about a week or so ago. he has some form of cancer and is probably going to pass away soon. my friend has taken Ritalin since he was 15 and switched over to cocaine when we were about 19. He is a struggling alcoholic like his father and mother and i know his room mate doesnt aid since they get smashed together every night. I know Zach well enough that I see he is just trying to escape the pain and situation of his father being so sick and fucked up. I really want to be there for him and I want him to get help or at least help himself. My only worry is that it seems like he is so deep in his emotions i dont know what to say with reason to help him. He made it pretty clear he was done fucking with the coke, but i still trip about the drinking bullshit.
Any advice or kind words you think I could tell him to help out through this? I feel like anytime i give advice to people i sound like their parental figure giving a lecture.. All i could really express to him is that i love him, he shouldnt be embarassed, that i dont judge him and that i am here for him. I dropped him off and made sure he got to bed comfortably and told him to give me a call after he got some rest. i didnt really know what else to do or if their is anything i can do beyond that.
-------------------- The bonds and ties of the life we know break easily. But through eternity one bond remains; the bond of fellowship. The fellowship of atoms, of star dust in its endless flight, of suns and worlds, of gods and men. The clasped hands of comradeship unite in a bond eternal; the fellowship of spirit. - My High Quality Lo-Fi Beats - - MushroomCultivation Compendium - - Doing Bulk w/ No PC - more about my music
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moonrockmushy
High on Spite



Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
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Re: Best Friend Over Did The Coke last night (story/advice pls) [Re: Lobi]
#24011912 - 01/15/17 11:11 AM (7 years, 15 days ago) |
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No really all you can do is be a friend and don't develop a weird codependent relationship. You can always give advice, whether it is solicited or not, but you can't control what choices another person makes in any ethical way and sometimes you've gotta just accept that.
In the spirit of harm reduction, it is better to just drink compared to mixing cocaine and alcohol. That is an issue already, and there is alot of absolute shit cocaine going around these days, as if cocaine wasn't dangerous enough. That is no small victory, and I would try to help him with that and let him know you are there for him if he needs a sober friend.
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Lobi
Bushido



Registered: 02/06/16
Posts: 1,231
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 4 months, 29 days
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Re: Best Friend Over Did The Coke last night (story/advice pls) [Re: moonrockmushy]
#24012012 - 01/15/17 11:44 AM (7 years, 15 days ago) |
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Dont think we are really codependent people but I feel you. I think I am more of trying to make him aware of the dangers of not testing his shit and not caring how cut it is. I think the latter will help the most. Discontinuing the mixing of the drugs will probably be the most benefit to his health. Thank you for your time, the first bit of what you said gave me some clarity on what to say to him next time we chat.
-------------------- The bonds and ties of the life we know break easily. But through eternity one bond remains; the bond of fellowship. The fellowship of atoms, of star dust in its endless flight, of suns and worlds, of gods and men. The clasped hands of comradeship unite in a bond eternal; the fellowship of spirit. - My High Quality Lo-Fi Beats - - MushroomCultivation Compendium - - Doing Bulk w/ No PC - more about my music
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zZZz
jesus


Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 33,478
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Re: Best Friend Over Did The Coke last night (story/advice pls) [Re: Lobi]
#24012323 - 01/15/17 02:25 PM (7 years, 15 days ago) |
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I think uve done good so far. Just gotta wait it out and see what happens. Every addiction is a struggle really, it's gonna take some time.. Im sure he got the message tho..
Good luck man
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DTCharlieB
yum yum fish.


Registered: 08/31/07
Posts: 1,027
Loc: Yak attack
Last seen: 5 years, 8 months
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Re: Best Friend Over Did The Coke last night (story/advice pls) [Re: zZZz]
#24012367 - 01/15/17 02:52 PM (7 years, 15 days ago) |
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Man it's tough trying to help someone in a situation like that. When someone is in a deep state of depression and trying anything to numb their pain away. I've been in a similar situation as yours before and it's no picnic it seems like anything you do isn't enough, and sometimes there is nothing you can do to fix it. You just have to be there for them and let you know how much you care about them and make sure they know your always there for them. Besides that it's mostly on them if they want to get better or not. Sometimes people need reminded of how much their family and friends mean to them. Sometimes they need reminded that if they somehow hurt themselves they, in return, hurt the people that love them. A lot of people don't care about themselves but will do anything for those close to them such as friends and family. In my situation I think the best thing I did was remind the person that if they got hurt or died they would devastate their loved ones. Sometimes people will suck it up and help themselves not for themselves but for others around them.
I'm sorry you have to go through this i know how hard it is and how helpless you can feel watching someone self destruct. I know it's tough but you also got to remember to look out for yourself at the same time. It can really take a toll on you when going through these situations. It did for me. Help your friend as much as you can but don't forget about taking care of yourself also. It's real easy to get lost in other people's problems and forget about your own, especially if you care a great deal for that person.
I wish you and your friend the best of luck and I truly hope you both get through this. Things will get better, time heals all wounds.I know it's cliche but there is truth to it. Good luck man hang in there.
-------------------- I like lasagna.
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Connoisseur

Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
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Re: Best Friend Over Did The Coke last night (story/advice pls) [Re: Lobi] 1
#24012412 - 01/15/17 03:19 PM (7 years, 15 days ago) |
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it was the combination with alcohol that caused him to OD
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musiclover420
psychonaut



Registered: 11/06/12
Posts: 19,563
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 2 years, 5 months
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Re: Best Friend Over Did The Coke last night (story/advice pls) [Re: Connoisseur] 1
#24012794 - 01/15/17 06:23 PM (7 years, 15 days ago) |
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Cancer isn't necessarily the end neither is addiction, depending on how bad it is he may still be able to get his shit together. Who knows.
You should definitely give him all the support you can though and maybe gently advise him to try and move towards a healthier lifestyle.
Even if he will pass away before long anyways he could get the most out of the time living healthier.
Maybe recommend he try kratom or something instead of alcohol and coke, it could help him feel better and fight the much more damaging addictions.
Also feel him out about psychedelics maybe, a nice trip could help put things in perspective for him.
Mushrooms can definitely do wonders for depression/ addiction in the right setting.
Anyways I wish you and your friend the best if he doesn't have much time left I hope he makes the best of it and either way trying to be healthier never hurts.
-------------------- Don't worry about me, I've got all that I need. And I'm singing my song to the sky You know how it feels, With the breeze of the sun in your eyes. Not minding that time's passing by I've got all and more, My smile, just as before. Is all that I carry with me I talk to myself, I need nobody else. I'm lost and I'm mine, yes I'm free
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eeso
Str@nger

Registered: 03/25/07
Posts: 554
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Re: Best Friend Over Did The Coke last night (story/advice pls) [Re: musiclover420]
#24014431 - 01/16/17 11:37 AM (7 years, 14 days ago) |
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I don't have any suggestions to give directly in response to your question. I've only done cocaine a handful of times. The hells-angels shit I did one time was fucking awesome, but it wasn't 'moreish' to me. My friends don't show as hardcore hard-drug addicts until they're dead (heroin, three fatal OD in six months last year.) As long as he's not fucking with cocaine anymore he should end up doing much better. Alcohol, well that can kill one too directly both in the short-term and definitely in the long-term. But I'm a drunkard as well, so I can't legitimately speak to speaking to someone about that.
Re: Connoisseurs comment. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cocaethylene
In most users, cocaethylene produces euphoria and has a longer duration of action than cocaine. Some studies suggest that it may be more cardiotoxic than cocaine and "it also carries an 18- to 25-fold increase over cocaine alone in risk of immediate death".
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Sheekle
FREE BURKE



Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
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Re: Best Friend Over Did The Coke last night (story/advice pls) [Re: Connoisseur]
#24014839 - 01/16/17 02:02 PM (7 years, 14 days ago) |
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Quote:
Connoisseur said: it was the combination with alcohol that caused him to OD
Yeah Connoisseur, you can't OD on cocaine alone, amazing observation. Did you learn that from a legalize heroin convention?
-------------------- "Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods "I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago "you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard "The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist "Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft "or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16
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Thayendanegea
quiet walker



Registered: 02/20/12
Posts: 7,596
Loc: 7 Lodges Nation
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Re: Best Friend Over Did The Coke last night (story/advice pls) [Re: Sheekle] 1
#24015119 - 01/16/17 03:45 PM (7 years, 14 days ago) |
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Your friend is lucky to be alive. He pushed the boundaries over the cliff and lived to talk about it. The same thing happened to me 20 plus years ago....hands and arms went numb after a 2-3 day binge on cocaine/ booze. My heart stopped for a couple seconds on 2 or 3 occasions.
I am an alcoholic and I never once chased cocaine when I wasn't drinking. My guess is this is similar behavior to your friend. The only thing that helped me was to stop drinking and that is the advice I would give your friend. Cutting back rarely works for alcoholics...total abstinence is desired. He should check out an AA meeting. Who knows, it may save his life....it did mine.
-------------------- Look Deep Into Nature,and Then You Will Understand Everything Better. Albert Einstein
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