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Memories



Registered: 05/09/12
Posts: 10,484
Loc: Suwannee River
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
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Filling the Void
#23968916 - 12/30/16 07:02 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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It's been a while since I've posted here. Hope some familiar faces will be able to chime in.
How many of you relate to feeling a sort of ever present void inside of you, typically stemming from a general dissatisfaction with life and the lack of any sort of concrete meaning or purpose on how, or even why, one should continue living?
I was sober for over a year, and i was able to find some relatively effective distractions in the forms of art, exercise, and meaningful social interaction, but even with these tools, there always seems to be that emptiness inside of me.
Lately i feel like i've been coming back to the idea of death anxiety being the primary human motivator, and the diverse actions we engage in primarily serving the purpose of distracting us from the ultimate fate we will all share.
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funkmastakush
Outlander

Registered: 08/24/14
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: Memories]
#23968932 - 12/30/16 07:09 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I can relate to this. Especially after taking shrooms.
I have already accepted the fact that there really is no purpose to humanity. Just a series of coincidinces brought us here. Death is inevitable. In the end, I think that time is the most important thing. To use your time in this reality to explore and get the most out of experiences. Life is what you make it.
-------------------- “If the words ‘life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness’ don’t include the right to experiment with your own consciousness, then the Declaration of Independence isn’t worth the hemp it was written on.” -Terence McKenna "Patience you must have my young Padawan" -Yoda
 
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sudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,812
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: Memories]
#23968937 - 12/30/16 07:12 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I think meanings are subjective and objective purpose is that of DNA to self replicate.
My personal meanings come from the value I place on my life and nature because when I think about it I realise that I only have one chance to live and I'm grateful for it.
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
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redgreenvines
irregular verb


Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 37,539
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: Memories]
#23968962 - 12/30/16 07:21 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Memories said: ... How many of you relate to feeling a sort of ever present void inside of you, typically stemming from a general dissatisfaction with life and the lack of any sort of concrete meaning or purpose on how, or even why, one should continue living? ...
welcome back Memories how did you get from that teaser about emptiness to the notion of death anxiety.
I thought you would make a more elaborate description about the Void, and maybe Filling the Void, but Death Anxiety is a dud. no need to plop that on something interesting.
--------------------
_ 🧠 _
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The Blind Ass
Bodhi



Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 26,660
Loc: The Primordial Mind
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: sudly]
#23968964 - 12/30/16 07:21 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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"There seems to be something phony about every attempt to define myself, to be totally honest. The trouble is that I can't see the back, much less the inside, of my head. I can't be honest because I don't fully know what I am. Consciousness peers out from a center which it cannot see—and that is the root of the matter. Life seems to resolve itself down to a tiny germ or nipple of sensitivity. I call it the Eenie-Weenie—a squiggling little nucleus that is trying to make love to itself and can never quite get there. The whole fabulous complexity of vegetable and animal life, as of human civilization, is just a colossal elaboration of the Eenie-Weenie trying to make the Eenie-Weenie. I am in love with myself, but cannot seek myself without hiding myself. As I pursue my own tail, it runs away from me, Does the amoeba split itself in two in an attempt to solve this problem?" ~Alan Watts...
fucking hilarious and poetic illustration of the play of life
-------------------- Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps
Edited by The Blind Ass (12/30/16 07:26 PM)
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Memories



Registered: 05/09/12
Posts: 10,484
Loc: Suwannee River
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: sudly]
#23968977 - 12/30/16 07:27 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I agree with both of you.
I have definitely found some worthwhile personal meaning and fulfillment with certain endeavors.
That being said, the emptiness and dissatisfaction always seems just below the surface, at least for me personally.
I've come to think that belief in and a "relationship" with a perceived higher power is the most effective way of combating the Ennui and Angst that so many seem to share.
At some of my darkest points i would even try to convince myself that there was some type of overarching, benevolent force which drove the universe and interactions comprising it, as this sort of belief seemed to be truly effective for helping so many come to terms with the many horrible truths of existence.
Alas, it seems impossible for me to truly embrace such thinking.
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Tmethyl
Smear in the shale


Registered: 07/16/12
Posts: 16,431
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: Memories]
#23968989 - 12/30/16 07:31 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I know them feels.
We can spend our entire life like this, just going back and fourth between these feelings of satisfaction and dissatisfaction, meaning and meaninglessness.
That void though. Have you ever tried loving it? I think running away from it, ignoring it, or trying to cover it up just make it worse. I think we must engage it, face it, feel it. Give it a chance to show you why it's there. One may find that it was not a monster, but a friend.
Maybe it's time to identify consciousness, and separate it from the mind. Consciousness is empty and void, but it's always present. In the same way that a blank canvas holds the entire painting, consciousness holds the entire Universe. It can only hold the entire universe of sounds, and colors and identities, because it is colorless, silent, and nobody.
I understand if this just seems silly to you, the person, the identity.  Searching for consciousness is like a character in a movie searching for the screen. You are already that. 
"I".
-------------------- ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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laughingdog
Stranger

Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 4,828
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: Memories]
#23968991 - 12/30/16 07:34 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Memories said: It's been a while since I've posted here. Hope some familiar faces will be able to chime in.
How many of you relate to feeling a sort of ever present void inside of you, typically stemming from a general dissatisfaction with life and the lack of any sort of concrete meaning or purpose on how, or even why, one should continue living?
I was sober for over a year, and i was able to find some relatively effective distractions in the forms of art, exercise, and meaningful social interaction, but even with these tools, there always seems to be that emptiness inside of me.
Lately i feel like i've been coming back to the idea of death anxiety being the primary human motivator, and the diverse actions we engage in primarily serving the purpose of distracting us from the ultimate fate we will all share.
I don't think there is a 'one size fits all answer' so I have only your own words to work with quote: "some relatively effective distractions"
so I would wonder: Why not stop distracting yourself? and face the unpleasantness you presumably have been avoiding
what happens after that would seem to be unknown
traditionally ceasing to distract oneself is called "meditation" but that is perhaps irrelevant
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laughingdog
Stranger

Registered: 03/14/04
Posts: 4,828
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simple logic would also seem to indicate that
thinking that one needs meaning,
is of course to perceive oneself,
as lacking something
and therefore also
as weak
or
as the saying goes:
"There is no way to happiness,
happiness is the way."
many other words may be substituted for 'happiness'
the principle remains the same
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Memories



Registered: 05/09/12
Posts: 10,484
Loc: Suwannee River
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
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Quote:
redgreenvines said:
Quote:
Memories said: ... How many of you relate to feeling a sort of ever present void inside of you, typically stemming from a general dissatisfaction with life and the lack of any sort of concrete meaning or purpose on how, or even why, one should continue living? ...
welcome back Memories how did you get from that teaser about emptiness to the notion of death anxiety.
I thought you would make a more elaborate description about the Void, and maybe Filling the Void, but Death Anxiety is a dud. no need to plop that on something interesting.
Indeed, DA has been beaten to death on this sub-forum.
But i really hadn't thought about Death Anxiety for years, and came to view it as a facet of human experience, but less encompassing than i had once thought.
This tangent of thought leading to my re-examining DA to be potentially as encompassing as i had once thought is likely brought on by my experiences with family over the holidays.
Each year, it seems as if there is more pain in the hearts of my loved ones as death becomes more real to them. It becomes harder for them to write it off as some distant event, not worthy of consideration.
My father, estranged to me through my childhood and early adult years, seems to be having increasing difficulty finding fulfillment through the building of wealth and symbols of success. I've noticed him start shifting towards a focus on attempting to build relationships with the creatures he brought into this world.
As this happens, i see him moving away from the desire for his children to follow the path of financial success. He recognizes his failure to create personal fulfillment, and seems to desire to help his children succeed where he has failed.
It all comes back to the void inside of us. He dedicated his life to a route he thought might make him finally feel whole, and now that it hasn't worked, is looking for fulfillment in attempting to help the only humans he's ever loved find fulfillment of their own.
Alas, i often come back to thinking it is never truly possible.
The best we can hope to do is find the best distraction for us personally.
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laughingdog
Stranger

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Posts: 4,828
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: Memories]
#23969071 - 12/30/16 07:56 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Memories said:
The best we can hope to do is find the best distraction for us personally.
with that attitude you will remain stuck
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Tmethyl
Smear in the shale


Registered: 07/16/12
Posts: 16,431
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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Quote:
laughingdog said:
Quote:
Memories said:
The best we can hope to do is find the best distraction for us personally.
with that attitude you will remain stuck
Yes. 
What you are looking for, is where you are looking from.
-------------------- ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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Duncan Rowhl
Fiducia Christum



Registered: 10/08/12
Posts: 2,659
Loc: UK
Last seen: 1 year, 5 months
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: Tmethyl]
#23969101 - 12/30/16 08:07 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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The void is unconscious yearning for the source - for 'God'.
We dont feel complete as beings because we are part of a split.
The spirit is out on its work experience, refining itself out in the challenges of the great jungle to be better upon its return,
The best thing we can do is try to and get as close to to the source as possible.
This is achievement by moral living, liking, then loving the self and others and the mind loses its boundaries.
Show sinners their TV dinners and urge them to try caviar.
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deff
just love everyone



Registered: 05/01/04
Posts: 9,406
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: Memories]
#23969105 - 12/30/16 08:09 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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maybe the reason you see a void within you is more to do with how you're looking than with what's there - we have different instruments to examine life and our being with. the rational mind has a productive range of uses, but is also terrible at other endeavours, such as this one. in my experience, rather than looking for a conceptual model as an answer, it is more fruitful to feel into a feeling of who we are - and what I tend to discover is at the core there is (of course not totally describable with words) a kind of loving presence.
but when we stay in the mind, the mind is blind to this and will convince us there is nothing - and so it takes diving into the heart, into feeling-consciousness, to connect with this. and what also can help is exercising self-love to ourselves, which seems to relax and allow the heart to open more, and we can realize we are love and we are what we seek
--------------------
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sudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,812
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: Memories]
#23969106 - 12/30/16 08:10 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Memories said: I agree with both of you.
I have definitely found some worthwhile personal meaning and fulfillment with certain endeavors.
That being said, the emptiness and dissatisfaction always seems just below the surface, at least for me personally.
I've come to think that belief in and a "relationship" with a perceived higher power is the most effective way of combating the Ennui and Angst that so many seem to share.
At some of my darkest points i would even try to convince myself that there was some type of overarching, benevolent force which drove the universe and interactions comprising it, as this sort of belief seemed to be truly effective for helping so many come to terms with the many horrible truths of existence.
Alas, it seems impossible for me to truly embrace such thinking.
For me Erwin Schrodinger's concept of negative entropy seems to fill the void that karma would take for most.
Quote:
The concept and phrase "negative entropy" was introduced by Erwin Schrödinger in his 1944 popular-science book What is Life? Later, Léon Brillouin shortened the phrase to negentropy, to express it in a more "positive" way: a living system imports negentropy and stores it
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
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Tmethyl
Smear in the shale


Registered: 07/16/12
Posts: 16,431
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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Quote:
Duncan Rowhl said: The best thing we can do is try to and get as close to to the source as possible
If I were to ask you to stand up and take a step toward yourself, what would you do? To imply that there is any distance between yourself and the source implies that you exist independently of the source.
You are already that. The operation of consciousness has created the ‘apparition’ called ‘me’. Now 'me' wants to be close to the source. 'Me' is also the source, like a wave is also the ocean.
-------------------- ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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Duncan Rowhl
Fiducia Christum



Registered: 10/08/12
Posts: 2,659
Loc: UK
Last seen: 1 year, 5 months
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: Tmethyl]
#23969166 - 12/30/16 08:33 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Tmethyl said:
Quote:
Duncan Rowhl said: The best thing we can do is try to and get as close to to the source as possible
If I were to ask you to stand up and take a step toward yourself, what would you do? To imply that there is any distance between yourself and the source implies that you exist independently of the source.
You are already that. The operation of consciousness has created the ‘apparition’ called ‘me’. Now 'me' wants to be close to the source. 'Me' is also the source, like a wave is also the ocean.
You regard 'close' as reference to distance rather than metaphor.
I concur; only one who doesn't comprehend regards God as a physical, far distant, separate entity.
The source is non-local. It always there, always within, always owned, always so. It is.
The 'closeness' is achieved by reducing oneself back to it, peeling away dependency and desire of the outward projection.
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Tmethyl
Smear in the shale


Registered: 07/16/12
Posts: 16,431
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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Well said.
-------------------- ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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Memories



Registered: 05/09/12
Posts: 10,484
Loc: Suwannee River
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
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Quote:
laughingdog said:
Quote:
Memories said:
The best we can hope to do is find the best distraction for us personally.
with that attitude you will remain stuck
You're right.
Fixating on this negative outlook only hinders my ability to successfully distract myself and find meaning.
The most fulfillment i've found comes when i let go of this habit of dissociating from life to analyze the distasteful perceptions of things, and instead, I allow myself to enter the flow. It is really an application of meditation to the proceedings of each day.
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The Blind Ass
Bodhi



Registered: 08/16/16
Posts: 26,660
Loc: The Primordial Mind
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Re: Filling the Void [Re: Memories]
#23969274 - 12/30/16 09:14 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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beware of snow
-------------------- Give me Liberty caps -or- give me Death caps
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