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SpaaaceFace
Stranger
Registered: 12/21/16
Posts: 36
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
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Re: Still love your ex's? [Re: Zombi3] 1
#23957911 - 12/26/16 09:17 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Haha I do still have it saved. You know, for science
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Patlal
You ask too many questions



Registered: 10/09/10
Posts: 44,797
Loc: Ottawa
Last seen: 12 hours, 22 minutes
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That poll was mean to me.
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Zombi3
Bella Ciao!!



Registered: 01/11/13
Posts: 27,086
Loc: Bat Country
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Re: Still love your ex's? [Re: Patlal]
#23957929 - 12/26/16 09:27 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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-------------------- You’ve Met With A Terrible Fate, Haven’t You?
Click here to enter this weeks Ban Lottery!! In Crust We Trust
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 29 days
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Re: Still love your ex's? [Re: Tmethyl]
#23957949 - 12/26/16 09:39 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Tmethyl said: I've never had an ex, so I don't know. (been with my same GF since I was 13) I would still love them because I love everyone.
Holy shit, is that like some religious thing? That's gnarly being with the same girl that long, not saying it's a bad thing, just you're a good person for holding down the fort that long, bravo, good on you mang.
I agree with the love thing, I am incredibly sappy about love, which I think is from blowing my mind with psychs, seriously. I feel like the world is broken, everyone telling me to be more hardcore, but I just can't get on board with that type of mentality, I tripped myself into a state of mind I can't change, I feel so full of love it makes me kind of embarrassed, I am a hardcore hippie in disguise, WTF! My whole being feels at odds with the world, like I am not supposed to be here, like I should be working on a commune away from regular society because I just don't get along with how most people think.
My family acts like I should be angry with my ex, but I am not, I got nothing but love for her and her family. We both got together too young, and we both did a lot of hard drugs, and we both had to much to fast which lead to some not so epic decisions being made, but those years are over, so no sense dwelling on them, I want the best for my ex and her family, and harbor no ill will towards them.
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ReposadoXochipilli
Here, there, inbetween



Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 7,501
Loc: Sand and sunshine
Last seen: 20 days, 52 seconds
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Re: Still love your ex's? [Re: Lucis]
#23957988 - 12/26/16 10:10 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I love my x from 9 years ago. We are not compatible in some ways so it's ok, but the love is still there. I wouldn't mind some sexy time but that is not in the cards.
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 29 days
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Quote:
ReposadoXochipilli said: but the love is still there.
I don't see how someone could not love their exes in some type of way, I mean if you spent a long period of time with them like 5+ years, you probably still love them in some way, just not in the way a person has to love someone in order to make things work in a relationship.
I think if you and your ex went through a lot together, then of course you would have love for them still, there's a big difference between having love for someone, and not getting over someone, a huge freakin difference, I find I have love for everyone I have had serious relationships with, friends, exes, whatever, but that doesn't mean I allow those feelings to interfere with my future relationships, and think it's wise to learn from your past, in order to create a better future for yourself.
Being ignorant and acting like past relationships don't matter, is a great way to sabotage future relationships, we all make mistakes, learn from them and continue to grow.
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ReposadoXochipilli
Here, there, inbetween



Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 7,501
Loc: Sand and sunshine
Last seen: 20 days, 52 seconds
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Re: Still love your ex's? [Re: Lucis]
#23958035 - 12/26/16 10:35 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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That is a mature way of viewing love and you are open and honest about it. I don't think many especially younger people have enough life under thier belt to be able to love like that or cope with life after it moves on.
Lots of people only can love themselves and are clueless towards what real love is like.
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demiu5
humans, lol


Registered: 08/18/05
Posts: 43,948
Loc: the popcorn stadium
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Quote:
ReposadoXochipilli said: Lots of people only can love themselves and are clueless towards what real love is like.
is self-love not "real love?"
imo, self-love is far more important than love of any other.
so long as one is aware that they don't have/aren't able to wholly love another beyond themselves, and aren't wrecking others' lives as a result, then no-harm-no-foul
-------------------- channel your inner Larry David
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ReposadoXochipilli
Here, there, inbetween



Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 7,501
Loc: Sand and sunshine
Last seen: 20 days, 52 seconds
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Re: Still love your ex's? [Re: demiu5]
#23958094 - 12/26/16 11:08 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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It is the same love but enacted upon it is completely different. Imo self love line that seeks out others to fit into it's ideals where as love with another is embracing change and growth.
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Edited by ReposadoXochipilli (12/26/16 11:08 AM)
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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE



Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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I l will probably always love my second real girlfriend. But my current one is the bees knees.
My first gf and I bang like animals whenever we see eachother even though she hates me  Luckily dont run into her anymore
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
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Tmethyl
Smear in the shale


Registered: 07/16/12
Posts: 16,431
Loc: Florida
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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Re: Still love your ex's? [Re: Lucis] 1
#23958198 - 12/26/16 12:12 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Fennario said:
Quote:
Tmethyl said: I've never had an ex, so I don't know. (been with my same GF since I was 13) I would still love them because I love everyone.
Holy shit, is that like some religious thing? That's gnarly being with the same girl that long, not saying it's a bad thing, just you're a good person for holding down the fort that long, bravo, good on you mang.
I have nothing to do with any religion, I just met her by chance and knew she was the one. Sounds corny as shit and cliche, I know. But even at 13, you can know when you find the one.
She somehow felt the same, when I was 13 she was 17 though, but it all worked out.
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: Still love your ex's? [Re: Tmethyl] 3
#23958199 - 12/26/16 12:15 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I still love who they were or who I thought they were.
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PartoftheSource
NAUT GUILTY



Registered: 05/27/15
Posts: 3,023
Loc: MIDWEST
Last seen: 5 years, 11 months
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Yes - i still love her dearly.
-------------------- Shroomery Stickers!
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Prozac
Hotdogs


Registered: 12/15/16
Posts: 859
Loc: Miami, FL
Last seen: 1 day, 15 hours
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There will always be a place in my heart for my ex. God rest his soul.
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Burke Dennings
baby merchant

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 81,641
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I'm still friends to some degree with every ex gf I've had, and two of them are what I consider to be very close friends. I love them as I would any other friend, guy or girl. But like romantically? Not at all. Nor do I wish anything would've worked out differently.
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trees


Registered: 02/08/09
Posts: 9,194
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When you know someone too well, like; better than they know themselves, your human mind never forgets that person cause we'r wired for compassion, and so you sorta permanently love them. This applies to everyone you might know, not just ex's I'd say.
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Burke Dennings
baby merchant

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 81,641
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Re: Still love your ex's? [Re: trees] 2
#23958321 - 12/26/16 01:08 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Agreed.
I have a friend (a guy) who I've known for well over 20 years. 2 years ago he got wrapped up in heroin again, and ended up stealing a bunch of shit from me. As pissed off as I was about it, I still hope he gets better & if he were to contact me & apologize, I'd forgive him (but wouldn't really trust him for a while). Not that I'm holding my breath waiting for that phone call, haha. But I've loved him as a friend, we grew up together, and it's easier for me to care about people than to hate them.
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pirate-blues


Registered: 10/15/12
Posts: 13,656
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I think I did, we recently reconnected and I still maintain he was the only person I loved and that doesn't disappear - there is still an undeniable connection - I think I just realized that I would never be happy as long as I was with him and that he isn't going to change into the person I need him to be for me to be happy - and far be it from me to try and change another human..the only person I can control is myself and I'm not gonna sacrifice my life waiting around for someone to change.
He's a good human being, but I feel like he keeps me at arms length and on the back burner so that I'm 'there' when he's ready to actually have a mature relationship...I think if you talked to him he would probably accuse me of doing the same exact thing, and I don't think he would be entirely wrong though it's partially a reactionary thing to protect myself emotionally from what he does to me...it's so stupid, we're so similar and the way we communicate is not healthy - I've hit the point where I have no ill will towards him whatsoever, I would love to be friends(though we are friendly..I don't think we can be in each other's lives as friends) if it were possible..but I know it's not gonna ever work out, and I'm okay with that. Certainly not going to waste the rest of my 20's chasing smoke.
TLDR ;STAL
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Quote:
pirate-blues said: I think I did, we recently reconnected and I still maintain he was the only person I loved and that doesn't disappear - there is still an undeniable connection - I think I just realized that I would never be happy as long as I was with him and that he isn't going to change into the person I need him to be for me to be happy - and far be it from me to try and change another human..the only person I can control is myself and I'm not gonna sacrifice my life waiting around for someone to change.
This is kinda how I'm feeling about my current partner. Which rather sucks.
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Free time is the only time
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Dr. P. Silocybin
Would you like fries with that?



Registered: 09/09/08
Posts: 2,620
Loc: The Great Divide
Last seen: 3 years, 11 months
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For me it's a terrible mixture of love and hate. It would be so much easier if it were just one of those emotions. Just love and I could look back fondly on what we had, and truly wish her the best. Just hate and I could be glad we're not together. But the combination of those opposing emotions makes it really painful to think about her, and it's impossible not to.
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