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DustyBottoms



Registered: 11/07/14
Posts: 3,071
Loc: TheUnderbelly
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How to pass a drug test...
#23944378 - 12/20/16 07:13 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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My brother needs to take a drug test in the next week or two. He thinks it's going to be a piss test. He smoked weed as recently as yesterday.
What's his best option? Taking in someone else's urine? He's contemplating to just keep it clean these next few weeks and try some type of flush system at a health store but I don't think his chances are very good going this route.
I wish I still had my whizzinator but I gave it to a "friend" that turned out to be a huge bag of shit and he never returned that or anything else I lent him.
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Easyriding123
Extra ordinary


Registered: 02/25/16
Posts: 744
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Head shops sell synthetic urine. If it's for a job and he has to go to a lab, they will not watch you pee. Heat up the piss go to the lab.
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SonicTitan


Registered: 05/17/16
Posts: 24,068
Last seen: 3 hours, 1 minute
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They can tell when you use masking devises. Really just time and exercise, but even then when you burn more fat the chances of THC showing up in urine can be increased. It all depends on how much he smokes too.
-------------------- "We are a way for the cosmos to know itself."
 
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DustyBottoms



Registered: 11/07/14
Posts: 3,071
Loc: TheUnderbelly
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Quote:
Easyriding123 said: Head shops sell synthetic urine. If it's for a job and he has to go to a lab, they will not watch you pee. Heat up the piss go to the lab.
Ive used the synthetic urine too but that was like 15 yrs ago. I was wondering if drug test technology has changed enough where they can now test to see if it's synthetic or not.
He and I are both concerned about the temp, whether it's synthetic or someone else's piss. Suggestions on how to work around this?
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Kush_Zombie
smug piece of shit



Registered: 10/22/14
Posts: 4,793
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Quit doing drugs you degenerate.
-------------------- How to get started in bulk: Presto 23-Quart Pressure Cooker BOD's Simple as FUCK Still Air Box PastyWhyte's Easy Agar Tek Munchauzen's Cultivation Video Series How EvilMushroom666 Prepares His Grains (I use jars with Synthetic Filter Discs) What is G2G? (Grain-to-Grain) Damion5050's Coir Tek (I use 5.5 - 6 quarts of water instead of 4. Also ignore step 13 and ignore the monotub completely. The only purpose of this tek is to show you how to make a simple substrate. I also add gypsum to it but not necessary) Spitball's Monotub Tek (A liner isn't necessary but is useful) Use 6500k lights throughout the whole process. When you wake up, turn the light on. When you go to sleep turn the light off. It's as simple as that.
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Easyriding123
Extra ordinary


Registered: 02/25/16
Posts: 744
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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They give you a temperature strip that changes colors according to the temp. It's just a sticker that you put on the piss bottle. Easy stuff man
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DustyBottoms



Registered: 11/07/14
Posts: 3,071
Loc: TheUnderbelly
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Quote:
Easyriding123 said: They give you a temperature strip that changes colors according to the temp. It's just a sticker that you put on the piss bottle. Easy stuff man
Who is they? The headshop? I'm not so sure he lives in a town that will have a head shop let alone one with synthetic urine. And what if it's too hot/cold...what are you supposed to do about it once you're in the lab?
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FishyAl
neighborhood stoner man!



Registered: 09/13/16
Posts: 59
Loc: VA
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: SonicTitan]
#23944423 - 12/20/16 07:29 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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There is still a way to pass it legit. The first step is to not take anymore prohibited substances. No one wants to hear it, but it must be said. The best way to pass the test is to flush your system and exercise every day. I drink 2.5 liters per day and run hills for 30 mins. Twice a day. Do not exercise the day before the test and drink an energy drink before the test to dilute the urine and make it look extra yellow like you haven't been flushing. This has worked for me before.
-------------------- ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Reality is the cruelest dream. I am probably not a cop.....

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TheScientificMethod
Psychonautic Explorer & Writer



Registered: 02/20/14
Posts: 632
Loc: USA
Last seen: 22 days, 3 hours
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Use fake piss.
My current roommate worked in a piss lab for five years. He's told me a lot about it. He told me two things in particular that matter for your brother:
1) The piss lab tech will 100% know that it's fake piss. They can tell just by looking at it. 2) They can't tell your employeer. It's the policy to air in the favor of the client, and not the employeer. If your brother gets fake piss, the tech will know that it's fake, but the only thing that the tech can tell your employeer is that the sample came out clean.
Also worth noting is that he said that it's just the same with flushes/cleanses. He said that he could always tell when someone was using a cleanse just by the look of the piss. But same sort of thing, he can't report that to the employeer. He can only tell them the test result.
Worth noting: My roommate is a huge stoner. He smoked pot even when he was testing peoples' piss for a living. He said that it felt fucked up, but he needed to pay the bills. Now he's a bartender.
Option #2 is just to stop smoking piss, do a cleanse with a lot of teas and stuff and exercise a lot. He's cutting it close though. If I were in his shoes I'd get fake piss or buy piss off of someone who he knows to be clean.
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DustyBottoms



Registered: 11/07/14
Posts: 3,071
Loc: TheUnderbelly
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: FishyAl]
#23944432 - 12/20/16 07:31 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
FishyAl said: There is still a way to pass it legit. The first step is to not take anymore prohibited substances. No one wants to hear it, but it must be said. The best way to pass the test is to flush your system and exercise every day. I drink 2.5 liters per day and run hills for 30 mins. Twice a day. Do not exercise the day before the test and drink an energy drink before the test to dilute the urine and make it look extra yellow like you haven't been flushing. This has worked for me before.
If his test was in 2-3 weeks I would likely recommend to this as well. But there's a decent chance he will need to take the test within a week and I don't think this is going to work. He's a pretty heavy weed smoker.
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SonicTitan


Registered: 05/17/16
Posts: 24,068
Last seen: 3 hours, 1 minute
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: FishyAl]
#23944433 - 12/20/16 07:31 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Again that will all depend on how much he was smoking up until knowing he had a test coming up. A daily smoker will need weeks to piss clean even a couple months in some cases.
-------------------- "We are a way for the cosmos to know itself."
 
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DustyBottoms



Registered: 11/07/14
Posts: 3,071
Loc: TheUnderbelly
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Quote:
TheScientificMethod said: Use fake piss.
My current roommate worked in a piss lab for five years. He's told me a lot about it. He told me two things in particular that matter for your brother:
1) The piss lab tech will 100% know that it's fake piss. They can tell just by looking at it. 2) They can't tell your employeer. It's the policy to air in the favor of the client, and not the employeer. If your brother gets fake piss, the tech will know that it's fake, but the only thing that the tech can tell your employeer is that the sample came out clean.
Also worth noting is that he said that it's just the same with flushes/cleanses. He said that he could always tell when someone was using a cleanse just by the look of the piss. But same sort of thing, he can't report that to the employeer. He can only tell them the test result.
Worth noting: My roommate is a huge stoner. He smoked pot even when he was testing peoples' piss for a living. He said that it felt fucked up, but he needed to pay the bills. Now he's a bartender.
Option #2 is just to stop smoking piss, do a cleanse with a lot of teas and stuff and exercise a lot. He's cutting it close though. If I were in his shoes I'd get fake piss or buy piss off of someone who he knows to be clean.
How about the temp or should he not be worried about it? He already has a couple people lined up for their clean piss and and likely get it at a moments notice (for free!!!) on the day of the test. But he's FREAKING out about the temp not being right and is unsure how to regulate it.
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SonicTitan


Registered: 05/17/16
Posts: 24,068
Last seen: 3 hours, 1 minute
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He can tape the bag to the side of his leg before the appointment and it will eventually reach body temp.
-------------------- "We are a way for the cosmos to know itself."
 
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TheScientificMethod
Psychonautic Explorer & Writer



Registered: 02/20/14
Posts: 632
Loc: USA
Last seen: 22 days, 3 hours
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Quote:
DustyBottoms said:
Quote:
TheScientificMethod said: Use fake piss.
My current roommate worked in a piss lab for five years. He's told me a lot about it. He told me two things in particular that matter for your brother:
1) The piss lab tech will 100% know that it's fake piss. They can tell just by looking at it. 2) They can't tell your employeer. It's the policy to air in the favor of the client, and not the employeer. If your brother gets fake piss, the tech will know that it's fake, but the only thing that the tech can tell your employeer is that the sample came out clean.
Also worth noting is that he said that it's just the same with flushes/cleanses. He said that he could always tell when someone was using a cleanse just by the look of the piss. But same sort of thing, he can't report that to the employeer. He can only tell them the test result.
Worth noting: My roommate is a huge stoner. He smoked pot even when he was testing peoples' piss for a living. He said that it felt fucked up, but he needed to pay the bills. Now he's a bartender.
Option #2 is just to stop smoking piss, do a cleanse with a lot of teas and stuff and exercise a lot. He's cutting it close though. If I were in his shoes I'd get fake piss or buy piss off of someone who he knows to be clean.
How about the temp or should he not be worried about it? He already has a couple people lined up for their clean piss and and likely get it at a moments notice (for free!!!) on the day of the test. But he's FREAKING out about the temp not being right and is unsure how to regulate it.
Roommate never mentioned anything about that. He's not home right now, but I'll text him. I would just keep it in a ziplock bag and tape it to his ribs or something. That will warm it to body temperature. I'll text my roommate about that though and get back to you.
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TNK
Pleasures of Africa



Registered: 01/30/10
Posts: 14,237
Loc: I AM THUNDERBOT
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Kush_Zombie]
#23944466 - 12/20/16 07:41 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Kush_Zombie said: Quit doing drugs.
-------------------- Edited by TNK (02/22/22 22:22 PM)
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TNK
Pleasures of Africa



Registered: 01/30/10
Posts: 14,237
Loc: I AM THUNDERBOT
Last seen: 1 month, 18 days
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: TNK] 1
#23944468 - 12/20/16 07:41 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I will also sell you clean urine.
I got almost four months clean.
-------------------- Edited by TNK (02/22/22 22:22 PM)
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Kush_Zombie
smug piece of shit



Registered: 10/22/14
Posts: 4,793
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: TNK]
#23944479 - 12/20/16 07:47 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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http://www.quickfixurine.com/
Probably the most legit stuff you can use and it should stand up to lab testing as well.
-------------------- How to get started in bulk: Presto 23-Quart Pressure Cooker BOD's Simple as FUCK Still Air Box PastyWhyte's Easy Agar Tek Munchauzen's Cultivation Video Series How EvilMushroom666 Prepares His Grains (I use jars with Synthetic Filter Discs) What is G2G? (Grain-to-Grain) Damion5050's Coir Tek (I use 5.5 - 6 quarts of water instead of 4. Also ignore step 13 and ignore the monotub completely. The only purpose of this tek is to show you how to make a simple substrate. I also add gypsum to it but not necessary) Spitball's Monotub Tek (A liner isn't necessary but is useful) Use 6500k lights throughout the whole process. When you wake up, turn the light on. When you go to sleep turn the light off. It's as simple as that.
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TheScientificMethod
Psychonautic Explorer & Writer



Registered: 02/20/14
Posts: 632
Loc: USA
Last seen: 22 days, 3 hours
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Kush_Zombie]
#23944487 - 12/20/16 07:50 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Roommate texted me back.
He said that *he* never tested temperature because he was working in the lab, but that they always test the temperature at the time of collection. I asked him if they always test temp and he said yes. I asked what you can do about that if you're using synthetic or someone else's' piss and he said that you can just microwave it "at a gas station" (not sure why he added that part???) and then tape it to your leg for awhile. The microwave will get it up to temperature and keeping it taped to your leg will keep it close to body temperature.
Good luck soldier. May the force be with you.
P.S. I do not give a fuck about Star Wars, did not see the new movie, and literally haven't watched any movies in the last three years. That still felt appropriate to say though.
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Kush_Zombie
smug piece of shit



Registered: 10/22/14
Posts: 4,793
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Also, the quickfix comes with a heatpad that keeps the urine at the proper temp for 8 hours. Also ph balanced and all that other good shit.
-------------------- How to get started in bulk: Presto 23-Quart Pressure Cooker BOD's Simple as FUCK Still Air Box PastyWhyte's Easy Agar Tek Munchauzen's Cultivation Video Series How EvilMushroom666 Prepares His Grains (I use jars with Synthetic Filter Discs) What is G2G? (Grain-to-Grain) Damion5050's Coir Tek (I use 5.5 - 6 quarts of water instead of 4. Also ignore step 13 and ignore the monotub completely. The only purpose of this tek is to show you how to make a simple substrate. I also add gypsum to it but not necessary) Spitball's Monotub Tek (A liner isn't necessary but is useful) Use 6500k lights throughout the whole process. When you wake up, turn the light on. When you go to sleep turn the light off. It's as simple as that.
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DustyBottoms



Registered: 11/07/14
Posts: 3,071
Loc: TheUnderbelly
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: TNK]
#23944499 - 12/20/16 07:54 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
TheNatureKid said:
Quote:
Kush_Zombie said: Quit doing drugs.
I dont do drugs, I am drugs.
And we're talking about my brother here, not me. If we were talking about me, this would be the part where I would tell you to go fuck yourself.
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DustyBottoms



Registered: 11/07/14
Posts: 3,071
Loc: TheUnderbelly
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Kush_Zombie]
#23944502 - 12/20/16 07:55 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Kush_Zombie said: Also, the quickfix comes with a heatpad that keeps the urine at the proper temp for 8 hours. Also ph balanced and all that other good shit.
Maybe he can get his hands on the kit for the heating pad. But I would prefer he uses someone else's piss and not synthetic
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Repertoire89
Cat



Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 21,773
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The best method Ive heard is to do so much drugs you break the drug test, you have to get a positive on every substance it tests for, saturate the blood stream with drugs
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DustyBottoms



Registered: 11/07/14
Posts: 3,071
Loc: TheUnderbelly
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Quote:
TheScientificMethod said: Roommate texted me back.
He said that *he* never tested temperature because he was working in the lab, but that they always test the temperature at the time of collection. I asked him if they always test temp and he said yes. I asked what you can do about that if you're using synthetic or someone else's' piss and he said that you can just microwave it "at a gas station" (not sure why he added that part???) and then tape it to your leg for awhile. The microwave will get it up to temperature and keeping it taped to your leg will keep it close to body temperature.
Good luck soldier. May the force be with you.
P.S. I do not give a fuck about Star Wars, did not see the new movie, and literally haven't watched any movies in the last three years. That still felt appropriate to say though.
Thanks for reaching out to him. I'll pass this info along. My bro found some shit online that says most drug tests allow for a 2-3 degree variance on both sides of 98.6...that's an awfully tight window to go microwave and then follow it up with it taped to your leg.
BUT....we're talking about trying to pass a drug test by cheating it. Nothing is foolproof other than beating it legit which I'm trying to get my brother to accept.
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Kush_Zombie
smug piece of shit



Registered: 10/22/14
Posts: 4,793
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-------------------- How to get started in bulk: Presto 23-Quart Pressure Cooker BOD's Simple as FUCK Still Air Box PastyWhyte's Easy Agar Tek Munchauzen's Cultivation Video Series How EvilMushroom666 Prepares His Grains (I use jars with Synthetic Filter Discs) What is G2G? (Grain-to-Grain) Damion5050's Coir Tek (I use 5.5 - 6 quarts of water instead of 4. Also ignore step 13 and ignore the monotub completely. The only purpose of this tek is to show you how to make a simple substrate. I also add gypsum to it but not necessary) Spitball's Monotub Tek (A liner isn't necessary but is useful) Use 6500k lights throughout the whole process. When you wake up, turn the light on. When you go to sleep turn the light off. It's as simple as that.
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keyser_soze
Truth Bomber
Registered: 03/04/16
Posts: 1,417
Last seen: 6 years, 3 months
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Quote:
TheScientificMethod said: 2) They can't tell your employeer. It's the policy to air in the favor of the client, and not the employeer.
i would read the fine print.
after all, his employer is the client in this situation.
if anything he would have to retake the test.
-------------------- People in my Fan Club: Masked (President), Ballsalsa (VP), The Ecstatic*don't waste your time "debating" with him, he uses 3rd grader tactics (Director of Bullshit), Koods (Fake News Anchorman), Falcon - Devout Communist *Word your posts carefully if they contain right wing values. The moderators here like to keep it left leaning, they will use every excuse to ban you but not the others. You've been warned.
Edited by keyser_soze (12/20/16 08:03 PM)
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ChemicalSpark


Registered: 10/08/15
Posts: 2,057
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Kush_Zombie] 1
#23944519 - 12/20/16 08:01 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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.
Edited by ChemicalSpark (03/23/20 09:31 PM)
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Kush_Zombie
smug piece of shit



Registered: 10/22/14
Posts: 4,793
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Quote:
ChemicalSpark said: Fake pee only passes the dipstick panel tests. If they send it to a lab for analysis then you will still fail because they can tell that it's fake. It happened to me once when applying for a job.
The next time I had to test for employment I just asked a clean friend to pee in the container that came with the fake urine kit. That worked like a charm. You can strap it to your leg and wear it for awhile so it'll be at body temp.
Read about the quickfix. Not all synthetic urines are the same
-------------------- How to get started in bulk: Presto 23-Quart Pressure Cooker BOD's Simple as FUCK Still Air Box PastyWhyte's Easy Agar Tek Munchauzen's Cultivation Video Series How EvilMushroom666 Prepares His Grains (I use jars with Synthetic Filter Discs) What is G2G? (Grain-to-Grain) Damion5050's Coir Tek (I use 5.5 - 6 quarts of water instead of 4. Also ignore step 13 and ignore the monotub completely. The only purpose of this tek is to show you how to make a simple substrate. I also add gypsum to it but not necessary) Spitball's Monotub Tek (A liner isn't necessary but is useful) Use 6500k lights throughout the whole process. When you wake up, turn the light on. When you go to sleep turn the light off. It's as simple as that.
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TheScientificMethod
Psychonautic Explorer & Writer



Registered: 02/20/14
Posts: 632
Loc: USA
Last seen: 22 days, 3 hours
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: keyser_soze]
#23944565 - 12/20/16 08:30 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
keyser_soze said:
Quote:
TheScientificMethod said: 2) They can't tell your employeer. It's the policy to air in the favor of the client, and not the employeer.
i would read the fine print.
after all, his employer is the client in this situation.
if anything he would have to retake the test.
By "client" I meant the "person being tested." Poor choice of words on my part. I suppose that every lab is different, but he has a pretty good knowledge of the industry. They air in the favor of the person whose piss is being tested if there is ever a question. Or at least thats how things worked where he was employed.
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Easyriding123
Extra ordinary


Registered: 02/25/16
Posts: 744
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Kush_Zombie]
#23944566 - 12/20/16 08:31 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quick fix plus is what I used also. Comes with a temperature strip and a heating pad to keep template consistent while waiting in the lobby. I used it for a good job and it worked well.
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sh4d0ws
LSx


Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 12,086
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: SonicTitan]
#23944569 - 12/20/16 08:34 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
SonicTitan said: They can tell when you use masking devises. Really just time and exercise, but even then when you burn more fat the chances of THC showing up in urine can be increased. It all depends on how much he smokes too.
Not if you use synthetic urine. If its not a probation test (not monitored) your best bet really is using synthetic urine.
It's gotten me jobs! And these are places that lab test the urine too, not just dip sticks. Make sure you get the up to date urine. I used the newest version of quickfix everytime, it always worked.
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Sporepoise
fungal cetacean


Registered: 02/21/16
Posts: 264
Last seen: 8 months, 9 days
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: sh4d0ws]
#23944608 - 12/20/16 08:55 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I have had quite a few experiences with drug testing without any positive results yet. My friends have also used the same method and have had success. I cant say that its always going to help you pass but from my experience it helps. Go to walmart and get some sure jell fruit pectin and a large bottle of gatorade. Mix the two and drink three hours before your test followed by at most a gallon of water. You don't want to drink too much water. It is possible for you to die this way or get sick. Im not completely sure how the fruit pectin helps and I cannot give you a scientific explanation but from what I read it coats your stomach and the water you drink afterwards pretty much goes through you without picking up much thc. Watering your piss down also helps. Hope this helps you out man fuck drug test.
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Edited by Sporepoise (12/20/16 09:00 PM)
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Repertoire89
Cat



Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 21,773
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Sporepoise]
#23944635 - 12/20/16 09:09 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Ive never failed a piss test using one of those drinks you take an hr or 2 before
Thats my go to, but for something important one should obviously go sober Substituting piss probably works better, but Ive never really had much at stake where a $15 drink wasnt a reasonable investment
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 29 days
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Sporepoise]
#23944637 - 12/20/16 09:09 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Is it for a job, or LEO?
If it's LEO, then you might be fucked because they stare at your pecker while you pee in a cup, at least that has been my glorious experience with them so no faking there.
If it's a job you could get some urine from a friend who's clean, fill up a large sized condom with it and strap some heating pads around it, get condoms that aren't lubed though, that way they aren't funky feeling. I used the warm condom method, took the condom out from the heating pads I had wrapped around it before I went into the place, when I put the urine in the cup it was right above 97 degrees, and I think only has to be 96 and above to be legit. Oh yeah, I had tapped it near my crotch before going in the place, and wore some tight undies to keep everything snug.
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weirdguy32
OTD shitstain


Registered: 01/25/15
Posts: 4,397
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Lucis]
#23944747 - 12/20/16 09:53 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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actually you don't even need the heating pad that comes with the Quick Fix. I've experimented plenty with an outdated version of the QF. For example I duct tape it (yes duct tape) to on my inner thigh right beneath my ball sack near the taint and literally did nothing for 8 hours after(sat in a chair watching tv and after the 8 hours the temp was 94 degrees. Also have done the same thing and did some activity(run errands, exercise and again after 8 hours temp was about 96)
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Prisoner#1
Even Dumber ThanAdvertized!


Registered: 01/22/03
Posts: 193,665
Loc: Pvt. Pubfag NutSuck
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Quote:
DustyBottoms said: My brother needs to take a drug test in the next week or two. He thinks it's going to be a piss test. He smoked weed as recently as yesterday.
What's his best option?
um... dont use drugs...
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LSDollar


Registered: 02/09/15
Posts: 2,361
Loc: Up Up and Away
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Prisoner#1]
#23944881 - 12/20/16 10:56 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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The more body fat you have, the longer it stays in your system. Im pretty skinny, 140, and I have passed drug tests in as little as 3 days, but I wouldn't try that, I would quit smoking and try to pass some sweat. on the day of the tests I wouldn't eat, I would drink water. 1.5-2 hours before the test I would pound a pot of coffee, and have to piss like crazy. It would be yellow too because coffee dehydrates you. Worked like a charm, about 3 dozen times for me.
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pinedownpioneer

Registered: 03/28/10
Posts: 2,536
Loc: TX
Last seen: 4 years, 8 months
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: LSDollar]
#23945491 - 12/21/16 09:05 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I have not used this yet but am prepared too. 1. Aquire clean urine 2. Run clean urine through a .22 micron filter to get rid of any solids that settle out. 3. Put filtered urine in sterile vial. 4. Buy small digital thermometer, hot hand heaters, tape, and a koozie. 5. Activate heaters, put heaters and vial into koozie, tape to leg. Check temp prior to test. 6. Hopefully pass test. How does this sound? Any suggestions? The filter gets rid of old piss smell, dark color, and solids. It looks and smells like fresh pee after going through filter.
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The Mycologist
Explorer

Registered: 05/06/16
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My buddy used head shop fake pee and got a job at walmart.
-------------------- "That you are here—that life exists, and identity; That the powerful play goes on, and you will contribute a verse.” ― Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass

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searching



Registered: 06/08/11
Posts: 4,128
Last seen: 5 months, 5 days
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Quote:
pinedownpioneer said: I have not used this yet but am prepared too. 1. Aquire clean urine 2. Run clean urine through a .22 micron filter to get rid of any solids that settle out. 3. Put filtered urine in sterile vial. 4. Buy small digital thermometer, hot hand heaters, tape, and a koozie. 5. Activate heaters, put heaters and vial into koozie, tape to leg. Check temp prior to test. 6. Hopefully pass test. How does this sound? Any suggestions? The filter gets rid of old piss smell, dark color, and solids. It looks and smells like fresh pee after going through filter.
You don't need to filter it, that's just gross. You can freeze urine and it will be good for at least a year. When you run the frozen bottle of urine under warm water to heat it up, all of the solids will dissolve.
Do NOT put it in a bag taped to your leg. You don't want that shit to spill out and look like you pissed yourself. Get a small 3oz travel shampoo bottle and some icy hot warming strip. Warm the pee up under hot water or microwave if you have to. Put it in the bottle, wrap with heating pad, put it in your underwear and tape it so it won't fall. Go in and pass the test. If the pee is too hot when you pour it in, the temp will drop very quickly by blowing on it. If it's too cold then you're fucked. But with the method I described it will stay over 96 degrees for at least 4 hours! If you're worried then get a digital thermometer and check it beforehand.
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pinedownpioneer

Registered: 03/28/10
Posts: 2,536
Loc: TX
Last seen: 4 years, 8 months
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: searching]
#23945934 - 12/21/16 12:07 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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It's really not that gross. With good lab skills no spillage occurs. Cant keep it frozen due to randoms at my job. It has to be ready to go at a moments notice. You are spot on about the ziplock though. I use sterile vials we use to run samples with. Ultra clean and no leaking
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keyser_soze
Truth Bomber
Registered: 03/04/16
Posts: 1,417
Last seen: 6 years, 3 months
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double
-------------------- People in my Fan Club: Masked (President), Ballsalsa (VP), The Ecstatic*don't waste your time "debating" with him, he uses 3rd grader tactics (Director of Bullshit), Koods (Fake News Anchorman), Falcon - Devout Communist *Word your posts carefully if they contain right wing values. The moderators here like to keep it left leaning, they will use every excuse to ban you but not the others. You've been warned.
Edited by keyser_soze (12/21/16 05:50 PM)
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keyser_soze
Truth Bomber
Registered: 03/04/16
Posts: 1,417
Last seen: 6 years, 3 months
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Quote:
TheScientificMethod said:
Quote:
keyser_soze said:
Quote:
TheScientificMethod said: 2) They can't tell your employeer. It's the policy to air in the favor of the client, and not the employeer.
i would read the fine print.
after all, his employer is the client in this situation.
if anything he would have to retake the test.
By "client" I meant the "person being tested." Poor choice of words on my part. I suppose that every lab is different, but he has a pretty good knowledge of the industry. They air in the favor of the person whose piss is being tested if there is ever a question. Or at least thats how things worked where he was employed.
i know full well what you meant. that's why i used italics and underlined words.
the lab has no fidicuiary duty to the potential employee. the obligation falls to the employer ordering the test.
what do you think would happen if the lab passed an applicant, only to get into a doozy at work, and during the investigations, came up as a questionable sample being fake, but they just go ahead and err on the side of the applicant instead of actually doing their jobs.
LOL, your friend was cutting corners man.
if they can detect fake urine and do detect it, it will be flagged.
-------------------- People in my Fan Club: Masked (President), Ballsalsa (VP), The Ecstatic*don't waste your time "debating" with him, he uses 3rd grader tactics (Director of Bullshit), Koods (Fake News Anchorman), Falcon - Devout Communist *Word your posts carefully if they contain right wing values. The moderators here like to keep it left leaning, they will use every excuse to ban you but not the others. You've been warned.
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DustyBottoms



Registered: 11/07/14
Posts: 3,071
Loc: TheUnderbelly
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: keyser_soze]
#23968628 - 12/30/16 04:52 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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He passed!!!
He used a friends clean piss and stored it in a plastic container with a built in thermometer and hot hands wrapped around it
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 29 days
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DustyBottoms



Registered: 11/07/14
Posts: 3,071
Loc: TheUnderbelly
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Lucis]
#23968663 - 12/30/16 05:11 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Fennario said:

It was a real team effort.
*My brother in laws clean piss *My xmas gift to my brother was the drug test kit *My mom did some research too prior to the test *You all helped with some great ideas (not counting the fucktards that offered "don't do drugs") *My brother sacrificed about 10lbs of body weight from being so nervous and not eating the last 10 days.
Nice job everyone. We should all be very proud of ourselves...
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Easyriding123
Extra ordinary


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Schwing
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Shroomism
Space Travellin



Registered: 02/13/00
Posts: 66,015
Loc: 9th Dimension
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In the event you cannot get someone clean to piss for you, this is the next best thing - have used numerous times with lab tests in the past with great success. I would never trust synthetic urine these days personally, the machines are too sophisticated now.. they catch synthetic a LOT and most places use machines now or places that subcontract take them to a lab that does.. dipsticks are rarer and rarer. synthetic isn't safe.
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LSDollar


Registered: 02/09/15
Posts: 2,361
Loc: Up Up and Away
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Shroomism]
#23969937 - 12/31/16 05:16 AM (7 years, 30 days ago) |
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Quote:
Shroomism said: In the event you cannot get someone clean to piss for you, this is the next best thing - have used numerous times with lab tests in the past with great success. I would never trust synthetic urine these days personally, the machines are too sophisticated now.. they catch synthetic a LOT and most places use machines now or places that subcontract take them to a lab that does.. dipsticks are rarer and rarer. synthetic isn't safe.
I have used quickfix twice for 15 panel lab tests for probation. Worked great for me
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Malcolm_Xtasy
Oh baby what Is you doin??


Registered: 04/04/12
Posts: 13,851
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: TNK]
#23969999 - 12/31/16 06:13 AM (7 years, 30 days ago) |
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Quote:
TheNatureKid said: I will also sell you clean urine.
I got almost four months clean.[/q
-------------------- I'm stupid, Enlil is smart. I'm ugly, Enlil is beautiful. I'm a loser, Enlil is a winner. Someday, I hope to be like Enlil but secretly know I never will.
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TheScientificMethod
Psychonautic Explorer & Writer



Registered: 02/20/14
Posts: 632
Loc: USA
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Re: How to pass a drug test... [Re: Shroomism]
#23970101 - 12/31/16 07:53 AM (7 years, 30 days ago) |
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Quote:
Shroomism said: In the event you cannot get someone clean to piss for you, this is the next best thing - have used numerous times with lab tests in the past with great success. I would never trust synthetic urine these days personally, the machines are too sophisticated now.. they catch synthetic a LOT and most places use machines now or places that subcontract take them to a lab that does.. dipsticks are rarer and rarer. synthetic isn't safe.
The website says this is synthetic. It may be the best synthetic, but I don't think it's real pee.
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