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daz01
Learning


Registered: 09/30/10
Posts: 4,652
Loc: Scotland
Last seen: 13 hours, 37 minutes
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my friend commit suicide
#23929323 - 12/15/16 01:03 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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friend since 5 yo. he turned 26 this august, high functioning aspergers. interesting and unique guy. he was your typical socially isolated shy autistic but got interested in psychedelics. he done mushrooms and was fine. he took a sudden obsessed positive interest in life out of his room. without my knowledge or support, he ordered and done a ton of RC LSD analogues. it really fucked him up and went psychotic but disguised it well. he got his first girlfriend at the start of 2016 but it eventually turned to shit. she was manipulative and loved controlling his vulnerable nature. it got verbally and sometimes physically abusive and her friends were even threatening him. fucking weak cowards 
i fucking warned his mum and a few people he was really ill but i got a "oh its just his aspergers, he'll be fine". aspergers, psychosis and severe depression. debilitating loneliness but his aspergers and illness made it extremely hard, almost impossible, for him to socialise. he took his life on tuesday. they think he was planning it for weeks.... WEEKS, down to every detail. the dude was living life knowing he WAS going to kill himself soon. he put on his favourite music and clothes, made a little ceremony and just did it.... i don't know how he done it yet but i dont think he had access to any drugs. he stayed over on sunday and i last seen him on monday.... not one goodbye... just a normal "see you later". he even had dinner with his family and gave his dad his birthday present on the monday night... we talked alot about a afterlife.... different universes... souls.... reincarnation. i think he was actually in peace and comfort knowing he was not going to suffer anymore and when he left his physical body... anything was possible.
i found out today he left me and his individual family letters. we cant get them until the police are done with the investigation 
for living and enduring a literal nightmare, i hope the super beings... Gods... made his next existence happy and full of bliss 
i've got a cold as well, so i can't even exercise or go to the gym to make myself feel better 
-------------------- Pain is temporary. It may last for a minute or an hour or a day or even a year but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it will last forever.
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SomeoneWhoIsMe
psilopsycho



Registered: 11/02/16
Posts: 466
Last seen: 1 year, 12 days
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: daz01]
#23929345 - 12/15/16 01:10 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Rest in peace to a good soul, sorry for yours & the family's loss man..
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SonicTitan


Registered: 05/17/16
Posts: 24,068
Last seen: 3 hours, 27 minutes
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: daz01]
#23929346 - 12/15/16 01:10 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Are you being legit? Not to sound offensive or anything but using all the emoticons really makes this look like a troll post. Or you are not taking the gravity of the situation that serious.
Again no offense and if this is infact true I am extremely sorry, I hope his family are holding up okay... I couldnt imagine losing a child (I dont have one but the sheer thought of it is immensly tragic)
-------------------- "We are a way for the cosmos to know itself."
 
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Crystal G



Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 6 days
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: SonicTitan] 1
#23929352 - 12/15/16 01:12 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
SonicTitan said: Are you being legit? Not to sound offensive or anything but using all the emoticons really makes this look like a troll post. Or you are not taking the gravity of the situation that serious.
I didn't see anything that suggested OP isn't taking it seriously?
Besides even if he was laughing about it, maybe that's just his coping mechanism.
Kind of rude to assume it was a troll post about something so serious, daz01 has been a member here for years.
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Morel Guy
Stranger


Registered: 01/23/13
Posts: 15,577
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: daz01]
#23929353 - 12/15/16 01:13 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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That is a very difficult age to have girl issues and disability issues. People are graduating colleges and getting jobs. Settling down with partners and making babies. It's an age that makes or breaks a person.
Sad to see someone try the other option.
-------------------- "in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur" In filth it will be found in dung it will be found
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SomeoneWhoIsMe
psilopsycho



Registered: 11/02/16
Posts: 466
Last seen: 1 year, 12 days
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: SonicTitan]
#23929357 - 12/15/16 01:14 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
SonicTitan said: Are you being legit? Not to sound offensive or anything but using all the emoticons really makes this look like a troll post. Or you are not taking the gravity of the situation that serious.
Seriously, Who are we to ask this question? everyone reacts differently.
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SonicTitan


Registered: 05/17/16
Posts: 24,068
Last seen: 3 hours, 27 minutes
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I diddnt mean offense at all, I understand it could be ways to cope, I dont know people here well butI dont know, it just felt that way. I really do apologize again I really diddnt mean any offense by what I said.
-------------------- "We are a way for the cosmos to know itself."
 
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daz01
Learning


Registered: 09/30/10
Posts: 4,652
Loc: Scotland
Last seen: 13 hours, 37 minutes
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: SonicTitan] 6
#23929394 - 12/15/16 01:25 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
SonicTitan said: Are you being legit? Not to sound offensive or anything but using all the emoticons really makes this look like a troll post. Or you are not taking the gravity of the situation that serious.
Again no offense and if this is infact true I am extremely sorry, I hope his family are holding up okay... I couldnt imagine losing a child (I dont have one but the sheer thought of it is immensly tragic)
it's heart breaking but it dosen't mean i'm going to slump into a depression and only focus on the negative. you've gotta find some happiness and positivity in even the worst of situations.
-------------------- Pain is temporary. It may last for a minute or an hour or a day or even a year but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it will last forever.
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SonicTitan


Registered: 05/17/16
Posts: 24,068
Last seen: 3 hours, 27 minutes
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: daz01]
#23929401 - 12/15/16 01:27 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I'm sorry man...
-------------------- "We are a way for the cosmos to know itself."
 
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WeAreMushroom
Ask Me About Bigfoot



Registered: 11/10/14
Posts: 1,405
Loc: Frying Like An Eagle
Last seen: 4 years, 10 months
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Re: my friend commit suicidef [Re: SonicTitan]
#23929406 - 12/15/16 01:27 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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While I realize this will likely be an unpopular opinion among the legions of research lysergamide lovers here, I blame the research lyergamides. 
Let me tell you why. While good ol' tried and true LSD-25 has caused it's own share of psychotic breakdowns, (mine included,) it's methods of distribution keep people who aren't "hip to the scene," from being able to purchase it. I doubt your buddy with aspergers would've been able to go buy a sheet in the lot at a String Cheese Incident show from some dreadlocked individuals he would've had to talk about old Dead albums and smoke a joint with.
The internet's analogue scene enables literally anybody to order sheets on sheets, packs on packs worth of research lyergamides for realitvely cheap though, mental issues or no mental issues, provided you can figure out what a bitcoin is.
While these analogs may or may not be safe, one thing we know is that we have NO IDEA what the long term consequences of using these are.
LSD an incredible, spiritual, mystical, some might even say sacred experience, and it's my personal, (but largely unpopular,) opinion that these research lysergamide substances are a bizarre perversion of the real thing.
I take LSD very seriously, it's almost a religion. It concerns me that there are variations at all of the most perfect molecule ever constructed by God.
Variations. The thought makes me shudder. LSD opens doors to bright, positive places, but who knows where other LSD derivatives might take you? 
That only one I could be compelled to try one day is ALD-52, since Albert Hofmann invented it. I trust his chemicals.
Many condolences in regard to your friend's death, OP. Perhaps this situation might compel you to feel similarly in regards to research chemicals.
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stzacrack
Stranger


Registered: 05/07/05
Posts: 3,871
Loc: United States
Last seen: 7 hours, 59 minutes
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: daz01]
#23929413 - 12/15/16 01:30 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
daz01 said:
friend since 5 yo. he turned 26 this august, high functioning aspergers. interesting and unique guy. he was your typical socially isolated shy autistic but got interested in psychedelics. he done mushrooms and was fine. he took a sudden obsessed positive interest in life out of his room. without my knowledge or support, he ordered and done a ton of RC LSD analogues. it really fucked him up and went psychotic but disguised it well. he got his first girlfriend at the start of 2016 but it eventually turned to shit. she was manipulative and loved controlling his vulnerable nature. it got verbally and sometimes physically abusive and her friends were even threatening him. fucking weak cowards 
i fucking warned his mum and a few people he was really ill but i got a "oh its just his aspergers, he'll be fine". aspergers, psychosis and severe depression. debilitating loneliness but his aspergers and illness made it extremely hard, almost impossible, for him to socialise. he took his life on tuesday. they think he was planning it for weeks.... WEEKS, down to every detail. the dude was living life knowing he WAS going to kill himself soon. he put on his favourite music and clothes, made a little ceremony and just did it.... i don't know how he done it yet but i dont think he had access to any drugs. he stayed over on sunday and i last seen him on monday.... not one goodbye... just a normal "see you later". he even had dinner with his family and gave his dad his birthday present on the monday night... we talked alot about a afterlife.... different universes... souls.... reincarnation. i think he was actually in peace and comfort knowing he was not going to suffer anymore and when he left his physical body... anything was possible.
i found out today he left me and his individual family letters. we cant get them until the police are done with the investigation 
for living and enduring a literal nightmare, i hope the super beings... Gods... made his next existence happy and full of bliss 
i've got a cold as well, so i can't even exercise or go to the gym to make myself feel better 
You were a good friend, he must've known, I'm sure you'll read that in your letter
Also, fuck those cops to
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Hobozen


Registered: 11/03/11
Posts: 10,634
Loc:
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: daz01]
#23929428 - 12/15/16 01:36 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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A peaceful death is better than a lifetime of insanity...
It was his choice and he had all the right to make it.
RIP
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,797
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: daz01] 1
#23929432 - 12/15/16 01:37 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Wow man, I wish you strength with your loss.
He's Eternal, you know that, he'll be around. He knew that and that probably helped him do it.
2016, the year of Cobalt, so many deaths and losses.

-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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Wu-tang
C20H25N3O



Registered: 10/02/16
Posts: 269
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Re: my friend commit suicide *DELETED* [Re: Morel Guy]
#23929434 - 12/15/16 01:39 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Post deleted by Wu-tangReason for deletion: None
-------------------- 400 years ago-The earth is the center of the universe and anyone who says outherwise is a heretic. How dare you claim that the earth is not the center of the universe? Your looking glass your moons around Jupiter and your navigation tables prove nothing. Your heresy is an affront to the church and to God who made the earth the center of the universe. Now-All drugs that can expand consciousness are without medical or social justification and anyone who uses them is a criminal. How dare you claim that an understanding of God is to be found in a white powder? This talk of communication with the inner self, the finding of one's way into the hidden reaches of the unconscious, is New Age nonsense and simply an excuse to use dangerous drugs.
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OhMrJohnson
Ashes Against The Grain

Registered: 01/12/14
Posts: 17,544
Loc: Terra Incognita
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: Wu-tang]
#23929443 - 12/15/16 01:41 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Requiescat in pace
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Diminish the sub-principle and leave its toxic trace.. Once and for all!
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JohnnieYen
Okay



Registered: 03/15/11
Posts: 3,529
Loc: City Z
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: daz01]
#23929444 - 12/15/16 01:42 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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sorry for your loss daz... this has been a difficult year for so many people. So difficult to lose a friend, especially one that has been there your whole life.
-------------------- [center
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: daz01]
#23929446 - 12/15/16 01:42 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
daz01 said:
Quote:
SonicTitan said: Are you being legit? Not to sound offensive or anything but using all the emoticons really makes this look like a troll post. Or you are not taking the gravity of the situation that serious.
Again no offense and if this is infact true I am extremely sorry, I hope his family are holding up okay... I couldnt imagine losing a child (I dont have one but the sheer thought of it is immensly tragic)
it's heart breaking but it dosen't mean i'm going to slump into a depression and only focus on the negative. you've gotta find some happiness and positivity in even the worst of situations.
I agree  Just be sure you aren't repressing your feelings or glossing over them. Talking about it is a good idea. Just make sure you let yourself stop and mourn when you feel the need to man.
I'm sorry things happened like that. But at least your bro is at peace now. Shame it had to be sought in such a tragic way
--------------------
Free time is the only time
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Morel Guy
Stranger


Registered: 01/23/13
Posts: 15,577
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: Wu-tang]
#23929508 - 12/15/16 02:00 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Suicide is sorta bullshit. I've put myself in danger when shit was out of hand. But suicide was never usually a very well planned out thing. It must take some very serious freaking out to do that sort of thing.
I guess I knew one guy that hanged himself. People must think it will never get better. Knew a guy that od'd also and people think it might of been on purpose.
Seems suicide is when there isn't any support. But people surprise the shit out of others.
I think life is worth sticking around for. No specific goal in mind, just living it out for that's the real slow suicide!
-------------------- "in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur" In filth it will be found in dung it will be found
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SomeoneWhoIsMe
psilopsycho



Registered: 11/02/16
Posts: 466
Last seen: 1 year, 12 days
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Re: my friend commit suicide *DELETED* [Re: Morel Guy]
#23929535 - 12/15/16 02:09 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Post deleted by SomeoneWhoIsMe
Reason for deletion: .
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Thayendanegea
quiet walker



Registered: 02/20/12
Posts: 7,596
Loc: 7 Lodges Nation
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Re: my friend commit suicide [Re: Morel Guy]
#23929545 - 12/15/16 02:12 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Sorry to hear about your friend. This time of year is tough on lots of people....always remember to try and be kind and caring whenever you come in contact with anyone....it may be the last time you see them. Prayers to you and your friends family.
-------------------- Look Deep Into Nature,and Then You Will Understand Everything Better. Albert Einstein
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