|
Anonymous #1
|
After 5 years I told her to leave...
#23917776 - 12/11/16 08:22 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
My girlfriend has been living with me for 5 years. For a while our relationship has been pretty drab. We get along but we never talk about anything deep or do anything fun together. We are always in separate rooms doing our own thing. The routine kiss and I love you every hello and goodbye... routine and predictable sex.
I've always mentioned that I want our relationship to change, or that we should move on. And she would always become emotional and want to stay, so I just let things go on the way they were because it was easier.
A few months ago she found out her younger brother is having a child and she started expressing her interest in starting a family with me. Having kids is something I never want to do l had a feeling she might stop taking her birth control and I couldn't get her to accept that I do not want children..... so I stopped having sex with her.... 4 months ago. And we continued on in our humdrum relationship.
I started asking her to leave because it seemed like we were going nowhere together. But this time she said yes.... I wasn't expecting that. Then the kisses hello and goodbye have stopped and the "I love yous" are gone. When I ask her about this she gets choked up... and tonight she told me she's moving back to her parents this Saturday (we are in our early 30's)
I don't know if I really want this even though I asked for it. All at once I realized that she is the only person I care about in my life. She is the only one who cares about me. I have no close family or friends... just her. I never realized how much she means to me. I know I could easily get her to stay... even if it means we just go back to living our boring existence with each other. I dont know what I want and might only have until Saturday to decide.
|
Anonymous #2
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23917800 - 12/11/16 08:30 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Did you make a thread before based on her financial stability and wanting to have a kid?
Anyway if it's so boring do you think her being gone will change that? Relationships can get stale but that comes with a level of comfort. You can't expect one person to do the legwork for two people. If you love each other then you need to really talk, and listen, and make an effort to give each other the things they want. I'm telling you in the most honest way possible - people are bored when they're being boring. You are both boring, if that is the case. You love her, you don't want her to go, and that is enough for me to say that based on what you've said here that it's worth working on.
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #2]
#23917830 - 12/11/16 08:41 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Yeah, that was me... I guess I get all my relationship advice from shroomery lol and yeah... we are both boring.
|
Anonymous #3
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23918472 - 12/12/16 02:24 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
You are just as boring as she is. While she is in the other room doing her thing, you are in balance doing your own thing in another room. If you want change in your relationship you need to embody it yourself and then you can inspire her by example. You can't force anyone to change, it comes from within but you can show them a different way... so make it appealing.
It honestly sounds like you care very much for her.
|
Anonymous #4
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23918654 - 12/12/16 05:54 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Anonymous #1 said: My girlfriend has been living with me for 5 years. For a while our relationship has been pretty drab.
I've always mentioned that I want our relationship to change, or that we should move on.
Having kids is something I never want to do ..... so I stopped having sex with her....
I started asking her to leave
But this time she said yes.... I wasn't expecting that.
I don't know if I really want this even though I asked for it.
|
Anonymous #4
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #4]
#23918655 - 12/12/16 05:55 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
|
Anonymous #5
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23922160 - 12/13/16 10:23 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Why don't you shove some spermicide in her vagina then you can continue having sex anyway?
When I started reading this post it was enjoyable. Now though, I am deeply filled with disappointment. I hope you DEEPLY find satisfaction in whichever department you are currently disappointed in with this girl.
|
Anonymous #6
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #5]
#23928092 - 12/15/16 12:00 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Why would you tell her to leave if you are not sure that's what you wanted
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #6] 1
#23928483 - 12/15/16 07:10 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
i guess because I thought it would make her wake up about some of the things I argue about with her... namely her unrestrained spending habits. But I guess she decided to leave instead. Bags are packed and everything is ready for the move on Saturday. She's as good as gone. She won't even talk to me. There has to be another dude. Girls treat dudes like monkey bars, they never let go of one until they already have the next one in the palm of their hand.
Edited by Anonymous (12/15/16 08:52 AM)
|
Anonymous #6
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23928929 - 12/15/16 11:00 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Yeah next time don't do that although I have done similar things like that before so I aim knocking you bud.
|
Anonymous #2
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23929122 - 12/15/16 12:01 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
She's still there, if you want her you have time to show her. Life is weird, I understand where you are coming from. You told her that without expecting things to change, like you'd be together forever. I'd tell her that. And buddy, there is no other dude.. I mean I can't say for sure but I really doubt it.
|
Anonymous #6
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #2]
#23930605 - 12/15/16 07:11 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
He should call her up in the middle of the night and graciously ask her to come over and stick his finger in her butt and tell her to take it like a man. Women like that.
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1] 2
#24039105 - 01/25/17 04:06 PM (7 years, 5 days ago) |
|
|
a little update on this... 2 weeks after she moved out she got pregnant by some dude. Kind of a deal breaker for me... talk about closure.
|
Anonymous #7
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1]
#24039184 - 01/25/17 04:27 PM (7 years, 5 days ago) |
|
|
Damn you just narrowly dodged that bullet. Chalk it up to life experience and do your thang.
|
Anonymous #8
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1] 1
#24039190 - 01/25/17 04:30 PM (7 years, 5 days ago) |
|
|
A month after moving out she knows she is pregnant?
It takes about two weeks to a month to even know you are pregnant from conception. That was fast.
You are better off without her. Cheers dude. Now you can live without possible regret of her leaving.
|
Anonymous #7
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #8]
#24039229 - 01/25/17 04:44 PM (7 years, 5 days ago) |
|
|
Well either way he hasn't dipped his pen in that well since 4 months before her departure so either she was or started jumping someone's bones or she's making it up. Either scenario is inconsequential. Curiosity has me wondering the nature of how he found out. I figured they wouldn't be doing much talking so does that mean he's checking facebook or what?
|
Anonymous #9
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1]
#24039501 - 01/25/17 06:30 PM (7 years, 5 days ago) |
|
|
You made the right choice man, thats for sure.
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #9]
#24039982 - 01/25/17 10:27 PM (7 years, 4 days ago) |
|
|
i called her just to see how she was doing and she was crying when she picked up the phone. She told me she got fired from her job and a bunch of shit was going on in her life... she wouldnt tell me because "I would really hate her". Finally she told me she "missed her period 2 weeks ago" and ultimately laid it out that she was banging some dude and shes pregnant.
This wasn't something she was saying just to piss me off, I could hear the desperation in her voice. She kept apologizing to me. I thought I would be devastated by something like that but I just feel numb. I thought I was dreaming, I still cant believe it. This girl just cant get out of her own way.
So now she's broke, 34, jobless, living with her parents and pregnant by some joe blow. WOW. If it wasnt over before, its definitely over now. But the big question is.... Should I still try to bang her? lol
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1]
#24040015 - 01/25/17 10:41 PM (7 years, 4 days ago) |
|
|
im gonna at least keep the line of communication open with her because I want a due date... If I have that, I can figure a conception date. I want to know if this was in the works while she was living with me. Stay tuned...
|
Anonymous #10
|
Re: After 5 years I told her to leave... [Re: Anonymous #1] 2
#24040045 - 01/25/17 10:55 PM (7 years, 4 days ago) |
|
|
I can't tell if that last part was a joke or not, but if it isn't I would personally avoid any physical intimacy.
If things are so far gone, and her life has taken so many hits so recently, it would only be confusing, and hurtful to her, to sleep with her, and if she is somebody you love(d) then she's worth sparing the pain. Plus it would probably be confusing to you so sleep with her again.
I say nah.
|
|