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unsui888
Embodied


Registered: 10/11/08
Posts: 1,154
Loc: United States
Last seen: 4 months, 9 hours
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Issues with ex-GF
#23885689 - 12/01/16 08:08 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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So I have some questions regarding an issue I am having. I am basically just wondering how to go about my situation...
I split with my ex-gf (best friend) a year ago. We got two dogs together and we agreed that I would get one and she would get the other when the time came. We were sharing custody of them both for a while in which she would take them for a week, and then I would take them the next week. Anyways, she got a new boyfriend, so I thought that was the time for us to part ways in which I take one of the dogs and she takes the other... however, as soon as I suggested this, she went back on her word and took both the dogs during an argument. She has been keeping my dogs from me for the past 4 months, and will not talk to me. She blocked my number and Facebook, so I call from other numbers and talk to her for 30min or so, which usually ends with no resolve. She thinks I am strung out on heroin again and does not trust me with the dogs, even though she admits I am a functional addict, and knows I am a college professor, so I obviously can take care of myself and teach college courses (but somehow I won't be able to take care of my dog who I have taken care of for years).
The dog is microchipped under her name, but that is about it. I have receipts showing that I have taken care of/paid for this dog over the past 4 years, and I am in the process of getting him certified as an emotional support dog. He is not registered under either of our names with the county we live in, so I need to do that (Can I register the dog with the county under my name if the dog is not physically present?).
I will have to resolve this through court or some type of mediation process, but I have no idea how to go about this, or what that entails. Has anyone dealt with this before? How do I go about this? She is currently not even home, but has the dogs with her out of town working on a weed farm. She also currently has a bunch of my shit at her house, and is unwilling to give it back as she will not interact with me.
So much for 10 years of best friendship...
Any and all advice is greatly appreciated!
-------------------- "a note for asses: what is very convincing, is not necessarily true - it is merely convincing" primus------------------------------------------------------------------------ -----------------------------------------------mama didn't raise no fool
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MollyLucyMaryJane

Registered: 09/10/11
Posts: 1,302
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: unsui888]
#23885701 - 12/01/16 08:11 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Call the police and tell them that she is withholding your property but you dont want to press charges or anything. When they go with you to get your property tell them that the dog is also yours. If they wont help you get the dog then threaten to take her to small claims court. Show her your not going to stop until you get your dog.
Getting your property with a police officer present will be easy and guaranteed. As for the dog it might not be possible even if you take her to court.
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sudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,812
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: unsui888]
#23886236 - 12/01/16 11:26 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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I dunno dude sounds like she's open to using your addiction against you if you call the police.
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
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MollyLucyMaryJane

Registered: 09/10/11
Posts: 1,302
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: sudly]
#23886275 - 12/01/16 11:41 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Just go sober, Police cant do shit to him even if she tells them hes addicted to shit its not like they can do anything about it. She cant just steal his property, You have to have the police escort you to her house and get your possessions. As for the dog without being able to prove its yours you would need to take her to court.
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tump
ban the undead


Registered: 03/17/16
Posts: 2,383
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Break in, take your stuff and burn it down while shes sleeping.
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finalexplosion
Stranger
Registered: 11/04/16
Posts: 370
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: tump]
#23887201 - 12/02/16 10:54 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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That's female nature. Agree not get a bf, back on carousel 2.0. A buddy had a ex steal his sofa and some of his clothes. Just weird petty shit. Very scorned. Move on. Life is too short.
-------------------- The light of wisdom is driving away the darkness. Look at the ground. Now you can see your own shadow. If you are scared by the shadow that follows you, just remember, wherever shadows fall, light is always nearby.
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Mescalean
Burke is love, burke is life.


Registered: 01/18/12
Posts: 6,755
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Typical female post break up shit. This is why we don't stay friends after much of the time OP. Theres no point in clinging to the past. I can see she was a good friend by stealing your shit. Might be sol op if the dogs chipped in her name... sorry to say
-------------------- FREE BURKE
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sudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,812
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: Mescalean]
#23898913 - 12/06/16 03:50 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
I can see she was a good friend by stealing your shit.
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
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finalexplosion
Stranger
Registered: 11/04/16
Posts: 370
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: Mescalean]
#23899184 - 12/06/16 07:50 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Mescalean said: Typical female post break up shit. This is why we don't stay friends after much of the time OP. Theres no point in clinging to the past. I can see she was a good friend by stealing your shit. Might be sol op if the dogs chipped in her name... sorry to say
All is fair in love and war.
After a breakup (assuming I was committed lol), I am stating my disappearing routine, and I progress precisely. I do not wish death upon the person but, I treat the situation like a death since, it died. They are no longer there. Its over so, I act as such. Now, I pursue an absurd amount of other girls. Best way to get over a girl is to get under new ones lol
Lastly, if you hover and hangout after a breakup, she friend zones you, goes swinging from dong to dong, and has you as consolation prize to fallback on after she is done being pincushion. #nothanks
-------------------- The light of wisdom is driving away the darkness. Look at the ground. Now you can see your own shadow. If you are scared by the shadow that follows you, just remember, wherever shadows fall, light is always nearby.
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dnkronic
Berzerker



Registered: 05/17/08
Posts: 460
Last seen: 11 months, 20 days
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You could get another dog.. there's lots of amazing dogs that need homes or they end up with a hot shot of fatal x.. sorry, about your situation. I'm sure you love them but there's lots of great pooches that need that kind of love that just end up euthanized. Every good dog needs a home. Just my 2.. DK
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vandago



Registered: 07/07/04
Posts: 20,917
Loc: .
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: unsui888]
#23899279 - 12/06/16 08:42 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
unsui888 said: So I have some questions regarding an issue I am having. I am basically just wondering how to go about my situation...
I split with my ex-gf (best friend) a year ago. We got two dogs together and we agreed that I would get one and she would get the other when the time came. We were sharing custody of them both for a while in which she would take them for a week, and then I would take them the next week. Anyways, she got a new boyfriend, so I thought that was the time for us to part ways in which I take one of the dogs and she takes the other... however, as soon as I suggested this, she went back on her word and took both the dogs during an argument. She has been keeping my dogs from me for the past 4 months, and will not talk to me. She blocked my number and Facebook, so I call from other numbers and talk to her for 30min or so, which usually ends with no resolve. She thinks I am strung out on heroin again and does not trust me with the dogs, even though she admits I am a functional addict, and knows I am a college professor, so I obviously can take care of myself and teach college courses (but somehow I won't be able to take care of my dog who I have taken care of for years).
The dog is microchipped under her name, but that is about it. I have receipts showing that I have taken care of/paid for this dog over the past 4 years, and I am in the process of getting him certified as an emotional support dog. He is not registered under either of our names with the county we live in, so I need to do that (Can I register the dog with the county under my name if the dog is not physically present?).
I will have to resolve this through court or some type of mediation process, but I have no idea how to go about this, or what that entails. Has anyone dealt with this before? How do I go about this? She is currently not even home, but has the dogs with her out of town working on a weed farm. She also currently has a bunch of my shit at her house, and is unwilling to give it back as she will not interact with me.
So much for 10 years of best friendship...
Any and all advice is greatly appreciated!
Would not hesitate to file a police report if someone took my dog, and that would be me being nice.
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Mr.GuessWork
Stranger

Registered: 03/30/13
Posts: 4,563
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: vandago]
#23901226 - 12/06/16 08:06 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Any police involvement will probably hurt everyone involved, including the dogs. I'd suggest avoiding that unless you feel somebody will be physically harmed. Can you talk with the BF? He might be less emotionally involved and willing to ask her to deal with this fairly.
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Anonymous #1
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Quote:
MollyLucyMaryJane said: Call the police and tell them that she is withholding your property but you dont want to press charges or anything.
Probably the nicest you can be in this situation
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 30 days
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
Quote:
MollyLucyMaryJane said: Call the police and tell them that she is withholding your property but you dont want to press charges or anything.
Probably the nicest you can be in this situation 
Fuck that, don't involved the cops, hate to say it OP, but buy a new puppy and start fresh.
You'll feel better having a new dog, you will only have your memories attached to it, nothing to remind you of your past relationship if it's a sore spot for you, but don't call the cops, just let it go man.
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sudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,812
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: Lucis]
#23914735 - 12/10/16 10:25 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Maybe a new cat would be a 'calmer' option as cats can take care of themselves pretty well.
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 30 days
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: sudly]
#23914840 - 12/10/16 10:55 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Yeah, a cat would be a great option, especially if OP is having to start fresh, like you said sudly, cats can take care of themselves, so if OP is busy getting his new life in order, might be easier on him.
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MollyLucyMaryJane

Registered: 09/10/11
Posts: 1,302
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: Lucis]
#23915298 - 12/11/16 06:05 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Lmao you people are funny. "give up, abandon your property and ditch your dog because cops are scary"
That is exactly what youre saying. The cops arent gonna plant cocaine on him and put him in prison. They wont kill him for no reason. Cops actually do have a purpose and this is one of them. He doesnt need to press charges either. All he needs to do is call them and tell them he needs an escort to retrieve his property.
She stole property from him. Imagine someone stole your ps4 and you knew exactly who did it, are you just gonna say oh well? What if someone stole your pet that you loved? Would you just abandon it because of feelings for your ex? Would you do the same with a child? How ridiculous to tell this man to just give up. You should be ashamed of yourselves.
Edited by MollyLucyMaryJane (12/11/16 06:14 AM)
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Patlal
You ask too many questions



Registered: 10/09/10
Posts: 44,797
Loc: Ottawa
Last seen: 16 hours, 4 minutes
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ManI don't know why women can get away with this shit. Property damage, stealing shit, keeping dogs. They always get off without penalty... The system will side with them too.
Let the dogs go man. Be the grown up here. Be the better person. She went low, don't follow.
Get a new dog and love it twice as much.
You won't win this...
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unsui888
Embodied


Registered: 10/11/08
Posts: 1,154
Loc: United States
Last seen: 4 months, 9 hours
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Re: Issues with ex-GF [Re: Patlal]
#23916414 - 12/11/16 01:58 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Damn, forgot I made this thread!
I cannot just go get a new dog... I do not think you guys saying that understand the level of companionship I shared with that dog. I think about him everyday... every time I see another dog, etc. etc.
I finally got her to come around in which she just emailed me today saying we should write up some document and sign it, probably to share custody... still waiting to hear back on what this document exactly would entail.
-------------------- "a note for asses: what is very convincing, is not necessarily true - it is merely convincing" primus------------------------------------------------------------------------ -----------------------------------------------mama didn't raise no fool
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 30 days
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Quote:
MollyLucyMaryJane said: Lmao you people are funny. "give up, abandon your property and ditch your dog because cops are scary"
That is exactly what youre saying. The cops arent gonna plant cocaine on him and put him in prison. They wont kill him for no reason. Cops actually do have a purpose and this is one of them.
No, that's not exactly what I am saying. Take it from me, having dealt with a psycho in the past who would gladly use the police as their ally, it's just a fucking hassle man, and bound to cause more drama.
I am not saying cops are scary, I just think that people involved in certain scenes should only call on police in the event of a murder, or some other horrendous crime, or if someone is hurt badly, and I feel like it might be easier for him to buy a new dog.
I guess the fact that you refer to your animals as property, and fail to recognize the fact that animals can be harmed by drama too, makes me think you wouldn't be the best pet owner, I could be mistaken though.
I have never viewed any of my cats/dogs as property, they were members of my family, I would share howls with them at the moon, and act crazy with them, we were a pack, a family, they were not my property, they were hairy children.
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