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Midnight_Toker
Gone Fishin'


Registered: 09/26/10
Posts: 11,589
Loc: Canada
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"The Worst Gift"
#23877603 - 11/29/16 08:58 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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My extended family usually does a Secret Santa when we do our Christmas dinner in December. This year though, we all decided to pitch in on a donation to the shelter that my sister's been helping to develop in South America instead. Now instead of not doing presents at all, it's been decided that we're doing a "worst gift" exchange.
The limit is supposed to be $10, but I figure if I think of or see a really good idea, I'm willing to pay ~$20.
Anyone have any ideas? Anyone ever been given a terrible gift?
A couple that I've seen and liked are: $10 worth of lottery tickets - but they've already been scratched and are losers. A gift card for $10-20, but all identifying information is blacked out so they don't know where it's from.
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King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows



Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 7,267
Last seen: 7 months, 14 hours
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I was thinking an acrylic bong for my family's white elephant thing.
-------------------- Your god is dead, and I killed him. When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul
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larry.fisherman
shoulda died already


Registered: 11/03/12
Posts: 36,294
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Lump of coal. I got this joke lump of coal years and years and years ago as a gift. It came with something else but yeah. It's kinda cool, it has this little lump of coal in a nice little baggy and a lil' book to read about it. I love the damn thing, I've kept it for almost 10 years, just waiting for the day I (sadly) pass it on to the next jackass.
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lavod
Seal Whisperer


Registered: 06/23/06
Posts: 5,440
Loc: Over the rainbow
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Crazy_Horse
I’m Rick James, bitch!


Registered: 08/15/16
Posts: 13,284
Loc: Hampsterdam
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Herpes
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,797
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If they are Liberals, a Make America Great Again cap.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 30 days
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A bible.
-------------------- ©️
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,797
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Re: "The Worst Gift" [Re: Lucis]
#23877749 - 11/29/16 10:02 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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A bible is a useful gift. Even if you are not a Christian, just opening it on a random page often supplies you with a life lesson.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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King Klick
That Guy Everyone Knows



Registered: 11/13/11
Posts: 7,267
Last seen: 7 months, 14 hours
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Re: "The Worst Gift" [Re: Asante]
#23877788 - 11/29/16 10:15 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Asante said: A bible is a useful gift. Even if you are not a Christian, just opening it on a random page often supplies you with a life lesson.
So can Tom Sawyer
-------------------- Your god is dead, and I killed him. When you’re lost, here I am. Forever with your soul
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 30 days
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Re: "The Worst Gift" [Re: Asante]
#23877808 - 11/29/16 10:20 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Asante said: A bible is a useful gift. Even if you are not a Christian, just opening it on a random page often supplies you with a life lesson.
I think I would rather teach the future generations myself, than rely on some outdated ideology, just my opinion.
If you give someone a bible and they find truth in it, how far are they willing to go with their new found faith? What if they think god is telling them to expunge the secular horde from the face of the planet? I don't want any part in that. I know that might not be to likely, but why would I take the risk? If I really saw someone struggling in life, and I gave them a bible, it might make them feel like they "needed jesus" because they were that fucked up, which seems rather judgmental if you ask me. I would rather be a good friend, and lead by example, the only thing a bible might be useful for, is toilet paper or to start a fire.
-------------------- ©️
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spirit_shadow
Feature not a bug



Registered: 08/15/11
Posts: 25,674
Last seen: 10 hours, 7 minutes
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Re: "The Worst Gift" [Re: Lucis]
#23877913 - 11/29/16 10:52 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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poopsenders.com
-------------------- ERROR 418 IM A TEAPOT.....(this account is automated, all posts related to illegal activities or advice thereof are strictly from numerous online sites and are for informational purposes only)- Circa 2011 Ban lotto
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Thayendanegea
quiet walker



Registered: 02/20/12
Posts: 7,596
Loc: 7 Lodges Nation
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Re: "The Worst Gift" [Re: Asante] 1
#23877915 - 11/29/16 10:53 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Asante said: If they are Liberals Americans with a conscience., a Make America Great Again cap.
fixed
-------------------- Look Deep Into Nature,and Then You Will Understand Everything Better. Albert Einstein
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,797
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Quote:
King Klick said:
Quote:
Asante said: A bible is a useful gift. Even if you are not a Christian, just opening it on a random page often supplies you with a life lesson.
So can Tom Sawyer
Exactly, so, either makes a fine gift.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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Asante
Mage


Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 86,797
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Re: "The Worst Gift" [Re: Asante]
#23877935 - 11/29/16 10:59 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Here's an idea..
A second hand Shake Weight.
The second hand part is the kicker and keeps it in budget.
-------------------- Omnicyclion.org higher knowledge starts here
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weirdguy32
OTD shitstain


Registered: 01/25/15
Posts: 4,397
Loc: Spicemaster SC
Last seen: 1 day, 23 minutes
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Re: "The Worst Gift" [Re: Asante]
#23877968 - 11/29/16 11:14 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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VIPoo for your devils' doughnuts
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Brewmaster
Mescalero



Registered: 09/27/06
Posts: 1,470
Loc: Richmond
Last seen: 2 years, 7 months
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Foreign currency....preferably from a country that no longer exists. Paper bills reading (?)10,000 but only equal $1.00 US. That's what I got as a wedding gift.
-------------------- On storing pedro tea... Brewmaster: Well, the mescaline will still be in there, but I'd be afraid of it conjealing and trying to escape after it grew in size from eating all the other shit in my fridge, and possibly my dogs if it got out. Pithlit: sentient drugs, now that is an idea ... OneMoreRobot: Idea? It's a fuckin' reality. You know Salvia? Nigga stole my TV.
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Soluminia
The mind is god



Registered: 03/18/11
Posts: 3,978
Loc: CO
Last seen: 11 months, 15 days
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A pair of old unwashed socks
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abltsandwich
JFK = Jelly Donut




Registered: 06/16/09
Posts: 11,537
Loc: Dildoville
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DNA sample (just jizz in a cup) A signed bone crime scene photos with inspiring messages written in metallic sharpie
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 30 days
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Quote:
abltsandwich said:
crime scene photos with inspiring messages written in metallic sharpie
A pic of someone who hanged themselves which says hang in there would be nice.
-------------------- ©️
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Shroomslip
Architekt



Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 5 hours, 49 minutes
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Look up recipes for homemade catfish stink bait. Seal in an airtight bag and wrap it up in a way that when they open the present, they also open the sealed bag.
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With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way. I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today. Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear. I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear. You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline
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