For years I've dealt with insomnia. Basically I would wake up every hour on the hour throughout the night. I could easily fall back to sleep (most times), but by the time the alarm went off I was exhausted. I basically just got used to it and felt like crap all the time. About a year ago I talked to my doctor about it and she put me on a very low dose of 25mg of Seroquel. It definitely helps, but it's not 100%. Then one day I was talking to a friend about it and he suggested I smoke some weed before bed. I live in a non-smoking apartment building, so I got a dab vaporizer setup and it's made a HUGE difference. I still wake up a few times through the night, but when I do wake up in the morning I actually feel like I got a decent amount of sleep. So.. With that background...
Most nights I will just take a couple hits of chemo shatter and I'm good. I get slightly stoned and I sleep pretty well. The other night I decided I wanted to actually get stoned so I took four good hits and lay back in bed. It hit pretty strongly. I felt like I was becoming pixelated, breaking into discrete blocks of being. The word "compartmentalized" kept repeating in my mind. I started to think about compartmentalizing my stress and anger. I visualized putting them into secure boxes and pushing them back in my mind. Then I fell asleep/blacked out?
I was dreaming and started to become acutely aware of several things. First was a feeling like strands of electricity grabbing onto my very soul and wrenching it upwards. Second was that my body was actually arched upwards, my back not even touching the bed, only my head and lower legs. Lastly, the noise. The only way I can describe it is a wet, squelchy, sucking noise. If you've listened to McKenna describe the DMT breakthrough you'll know the noise I'm describing. This lasted for a several seconds until I was fully awake and then it faded away.
I felt completely energized. My body was still buzzing slightly and I just lay there in shock of what had happened. I calmed myself down, lay back and went back to sleep.
The next day and increasingly over the next few days I noticed a huge difference in my being. My stress levels were (and still are) pretty much gone. This is saying a ton since I'm a week away from finals at university. I'm also very calm and things that normally should have had me get quite angry are just not phasing me.
I think I'm going to start trying to focus on positive visualization from now on and see where this takes me.
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