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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 30 days
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Re: Still love someone years later [Re: Repertoire89] 1
#23874515 - 11/28/16 08:39 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Jokeshopbeard said: IMO, and I have learned this very much the hard way, you should learn to not need to be with a girl. You should learn to love you and just be happy with you.
I agree with this.
I have told my family members this numerous times, to figure out who they are, I think it's solid advice everyone should practice. If you can't be alone with your own thoughts and accept yourself for who you are, then you have issues you're trying to bury, and you will take these issues out on your next partner.
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Jokeshopbeard said: That's what true love is. Love want's nothing in return.
Word.
True love is unconditional, I agree, good stuff JSB.
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Anonymous said: Right now im not happy with myself. I've been lazy and dont have a job dont have my car on the road. Thats all being changed, I deleted the addictive ass video games I play im gonna start making something of myself. Been looking hard for a job thats step #1
I believe your right man I need to get to the point that I respect myself and can take care of myself. In the meantime Im going to try to talk to her more, not for a relationship, I miss her as a friend. In the future when I have more respect for myself maybe things can be more than that.
Thanks again for the talk man good luck with your ventures =)
Anon1, how's your living situation?
Reason I ask, I am curious if you're around anyone that might be having a negative influence on you. Sometime people get out of relationships, and are back around their family more which is very common. That can be horrible because the person your family wanted you to be, is often not the person you really are, and they will bombard you with negativity while you're around them hoping to change you.
Might be a random question, but figured I would ask.
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Repertoire89 said: No, I think its strange that you can't form attachments to other individuals.
Not trying to be negative, just saying I don't think its healthy at all to be unable to form attachments with other women, not a true love thing so much as a spiritual / mental health crises.
If OP can't form relationships with new girls, then that might be a concern, something is not being dealt with.
As far as having a hard time forming relationships with other people, it's not that strange if you read a little bit on the subject.
I will use my own life as an example, because I think it's best to use experiences you have learned from personally, to help others, someone might find truth in what is said.
Anyway, went through a breakup years ago, and have not dated since then, and am currently not trying to date, I will not date until I have a few more things smoothed out in my life because I feel like that would put strain on my life which I don't need, and I have taken this time to think many things through without outside influence. I have taken time away from getting to know people in the state I have moved to, not for any strange reason, I just feel it's the best thing for me now until I am done with something which has been limiting me.
I also want to be able to have something decent for myself, this way when I get in another relationship I will be able to provide properly for the girl. My last relationship I sold pot for a while, then had numerous odd jobs here and there, I was young, dumb, and full of cum, and I didn't have good examples to follow as far as relationship issues go. I am very loyal to girls, I don't cheat because I have seen the damage it caused to some of my family members, so I think the next relationship I get in will be important because I have learned so much from my last one. This is why it's important for myself to work out my personal issues, and not to rush important decisions. My family acts like I should be ravenous for some vagina to wrap around my cock, but I am looking at the big picture, and I feel like that's the proper adult thing to do.
I am nice to anyone that engages me in conversation, but I don't actively seek friendships at the current moment, I have been like this my whole life, and as long as my mental health wasn't damaged, it was viewed as perfectly normal for an introvert as myself to be this way. I have always met people to buddy up with when I was supposed to meet them if that makes sense, it's kind of like LSD, people say it finds its way into your life when it's supposed to, might be some hippie thing to say, but I have found it to be true.
So I have taken a much needed respite from certain activities, and it has been extremely beneficial to my mental health, and my physical health too.
OP, as long as you're not sitting there and being miserable, and you're not hating yourself, then you're fine, but if you enter a negative headspace, and this negative mindset keeps you away from people, then you should try to work out what's happening, maybe see someone who's unbiased that can help you understand what you're going through better. Don't dwell on one relationship to much, you could become obsessed, which would not be healthy, just take your time in figuring your life out first, and as JSB stated above, things will fall into place.
The worst thing you can do is rush into important life choices, there's no pressure man, don't fall prey to feeling like because those around you are in relationships, or moving ahead regarding important life matters, that you must rush to keep up, we're all different, and some of us get to a decent place in life faster than others do, we're not all supposed to be equal regarding such things. It's like exercise, don't compare yourself to the person who's been doing it their whole life or who's genetically superior for being a beast, figure out what you're good at, and build from there.
No rush man.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Still love someone years later [Re: Lucis]
#23875747 - 11/28/16 05:10 PM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Thanks man. Im going to work on my own life until im comfortable with everything. Got to look out for me first, Hard not to be miserable sometimes but I guess thats just life. My main goal is to stop being a negative nancy and start thinking positive and being a Doer.
Thanks everyone for the replies.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: Still love someone years later [Re: Lucis]
#23876098 - 11/28/16 06:53 PM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Fennario said: I will use my own life as an example, because I think it's best to use experiences you have learned from personally, to help others, someone might find truth in what is said.
Anyway, went through a breakup years ago, and have not dated since then, and am currently not trying to date, I will not date until I have a few more things smoothed out in my life because I feel like that would put strain on my life which I don't need, and I have taken this time to think many things through without outside influence. I have taken time away from getting to know people in the state I have moved to, not for any strange reason, I just feel it's the best thing for me now until I am done with something which has been limiting me.
Fen you wonderful fucking motherfucker you. I love you man, you're such a sound guy. I absolutely agree with everything you've said, and am on the exact same path as you right now.
One thing that interests me massively about your post though, is that you say you are an Introvert. Do you recall what % I you were when you took the test DQ posted in PS&P?
I was like 84% Extrovert. I was surprised, even though I already know I'm a massive Extrovert. As similar as our thought patterns seem to be on 95% of shit, I'm surprised at that difference.
Do you feel you can just walk up to, and bond with nearly anyone?
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Repertoire89
Cat



Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 21,773
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Re: Still love someone years later *DELETED* [Re: Lucis]
#23877061 - 11/29/16 02:01 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Post deleted by Repertoire89Reason for deletion: fuck it
Edited by Repertoire89 (11/29/16 02:06 AM)
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Still love someone years later [Re: Repertoire89]
#23877072 - 11/29/16 02:07 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Being alive is an aberration This world is dumb. Im going to do what my gut tells me to and if its wrong so be it im done caring about it.
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 30 days
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Re: Still love someone years later [Re: Jokeshopbeard] 1
#23877731 - 11/29/16 09:53 AM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said:
One thing that interests me massively about your post though, is that you say you are an Introvert. Do you recall what % I you were when you took the test DQ posted in PS&P?
I was like 84% Extrovert. I was surprised, even though I already know I'm a massive Extrovert. As similar as our thought patterns seem to be on 95% of shit, I'm surprised at that difference.
Do you feel you can just walk up to, and bond with nearly anyone?
38% introverted.
I do feel like I can bond with anyone, this is actually something I am very good at, my only problem is getting through the first few stages of talking to someone new, but once I start talking I tend to not shut up about what I am passionate about, or talking to others about what they are passionate about. I want to know why people believe what they believe, and how they came to the conclusion that what they believe, was right for them. Peoples brains interest me.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: Still love someone years later [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23878580 - 11/29/16 03:03 PM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Fennario said: I want to know why people believe what they believe, and how they came to the conclusion that what they believe, was right for them. Peoples brains interest me.
Fucking Amen to that. The only thing that interests me more in this life than love itself is people.
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Anonymous said: Im going to do what my gut tells me to and if its wrong so be it im done caring about it.
Keep us posted please man, I'd really appreciate hearing how things work out for you.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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wicca mixer
Marmalade, I like marmalade :)



Registered: 07/30/10
Posts: 158
Last seen: 6 years, 10 days
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Re: Still love someone years later [Re: Jokeshopbeard] 1
#23878820 - 11/29/16 04:38 PM (7 years, 2 months ago) |
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Real love is forever and without condition, and it is outside of the bounds of space and time. Some people will never experience it during their life time, and probably wish they could experience it. It is definitely something special.
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finalexplosion
Stranger
Registered: 11/04/16
Posts: 370
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
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Re: Still love someone years later [Re: wicca mixer]
#23881285 - 11/30/16 11:18 AM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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The sort of girl you stick with is, the on you end up in jail, and she is waiting for you with her legs closed. In todays world, that is far from the case, and the idea of monogamy only looms overhead once people fear being alone.
-------------------- The light of wisdom is driving away the darkness. Look at the ground. Now you can see your own shadow. If you are scared by the shadow that follows you, just remember, wherever shadows fall, light is always nearby.
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Alyssa
consecrated woman ✝️

Registered: 11/25/14
Posts: 1,517
Last seen: 6 days, 4 hours
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Re: Still love someone years later [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23908281 - 12/08/16 07:55 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Tell her! Maybe she feels the same for you, or even if not, she might be interested. Be confident and convey the power of the emotions you're feeling for her without being overwhelming.
-------------------- I'm Alyssa. I'm consecrated to the Immaculate Heart. I don't want her to have to look at adultery to save my privileged living cells, so please keep it PG-13.
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