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Alyssa
consecrated woman ✝️

Registered: 11/25/14
Posts: 1,517
Last seen: 6 days, 43 minutes
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Re: Relationship - steadily aroused by other girls [Re: Starstepper]
#23910253 - 12/09/16 01:37 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Looks like the OP's been gone from this thread for some time now, but I might as well chip in. As I approach 30, my outlook on this has changed. Monogamy as it is generally practiced is a patriarchal construct, but I now have an ideal I consider even higher than polyamory. Polyamory is respectable, but I think if you can find that 1 super special person to completely unify yourself with, devote your entire life, heart, mind, body and soul to, adore absolutely without dividing your attention, that's the highest thing there is. She/he has eluded me so far, but if she/he comes along I will now be ready.
-------------------- I'm Alyssa. I'm consecrated to the Immaculate Heart. I don't want her to have to look at adultery to save my privileged living cells, so please keep it PG-13.
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sudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,810
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Re: Relationship - steadily aroused by other girls [Re: Alyssa]
#23910514 - 12/09/16 02:52 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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MOD EDIT: Please be polite in S&R.
polyamory that's called an open relationship. Monogamy is great for people who are codependent and trust each other.
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
Edited by Jokeshopbeard (12/09/16 04:11 PM)
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urbanguru


Registered: 09/11/11
Posts: 764
Loc: the swamp
Last seen: 2 months, 1 day
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Re: Relationship - steadily aroused by other girls [Re: sudly]
#23956464 - 12/25/16 01:13 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Ive been with my girl for 8 years and I am still constantly attracted to other women. Its not something that a man can help as its in our genes to spread the seed far and wide to proliferate the species. That being said the thought of hurting my significant other overpowers any urges I may have and thats the end of it. In other words, when you find the right partner you will still have those feelings but may be unable to act on them out of simple love and respect.
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sudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,810
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Re: Relationship - steadily aroused by other girls [Re: Alyssa]
#23956783 - 12/25/16 04:31 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Real polyamory maybe, with mutualistic two way selfless care, love and honesty but these days it seems as though a lot of people only want superficial communication for casual sex with strangers.
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
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Patlal
You ask too many questions


Registered: 10/09/10
Posts: 44,797
Loc: Ottawa
Last seen: 12 hours, 22 minutes
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Re: Relationship - steadily aroused by other girls [Re: Canon]
#23965485 - 12/29/16 12:53 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Canon said: Hi!
I dont know how to say that but I give it a try.
I have been in a relation ship for nearly one year and I am happy and she is really a nice and reasonable girl but I think all the time of other girls.
I am that kind of guy that changes his mind and interests very fast. Its hard to imagine that one has merely one sexual partner for the the rest of his life. As a man, I daresay that we need sexual variety in order to have good sexual balance.
How do you deal with that? Any recommendations?
Thx in advance?
You do like me. No relationship, friends with benefit only.
You'll always end up wanting what you can't have... It's life.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: Relationship - steadily aroused by other girls [Re: Alyssa]
#23965676 - 12/29/16 02:07 PM (7 years, 1 month ago) |
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Quote:
Alyssa said: Polyamory is respectable, but I think if you can find that 1 super special person to completely unify yourself with, devote your entire life, heart, mind, body and soul to, adore absolutely without dividing your attention, that's the highest thing there is. She/he has eluded me so far, but if she/he comes along I will now be ready.
This has been my experience too, finding 'the one' was by far the best thing that ever happened to me.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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OfTheVoid46
Timeless



Registered: 07/10/16
Posts: 148
Loc: USA
Last seen: 4 years, 11 months
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Re: Relationship - steadily aroused by other girls [Re: Canon]
#23970252 - 12/31/16 09:29 AM (7 years, 30 days ago) |
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Quote:
Canon said: I just ask myself, how couples are together for 30-40 years? I am quite astonished. These men must also have a need for other women but they deal with it, in a way.
I dont know what to say but my thoughts tell me to have sex with other girls. I am really torn.
That could be your issue. Maybe focus on finding someone you really love. At that point you'll feel bad at the thought of hurting them by screwing someone else. Cheesy sounding? Maybe.... False? No.
Also not wanting them to have another sexual partner but you to be able to is .... not happening. If you really want to bang multiple people I'm sure you can find a chick to go with it but you won't (rightfully) be able to expect them to be faithful to you. At that point you may as well just say screw the relationship and buy hookers.
EDIT: By the way, we all think of having sex with other people. That's natural. If you care about someone enough, you can contain it.
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Edited by OfTheVoid46 (12/31/16 09:30 AM)
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KauaiOrca
Waterman

Registered: 08/12/08
Posts: 3,131
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Re: Relationship - steadily aroused by other girls [Re: Canon]
#23970277 - 12/31/16 09:41 AM (7 years, 30 days ago) |
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Quote:
Canon said: Hi!
I dont know how to say that but I give it a try.
I have been in a relation ship for nearly one year and I am happy and she is really a nice and reasonable girl but I think all the time of other girls.
I am that kind of guy that changes his mind and interests very fast. Its hard to imagine that one has merely one sexual partner for the the rest of his life. As a man, I daresay that we need sexual variety in order to have good sexual balance.
How do you deal with that? Any recommendations?
Thx in advance?
What are your long term goals / interests? Do you want kids? A family? Do you want to build your own "village" so to speak?
I've been in a long-term relationship for over 15 years and the urge for recreational extra curricular sex never goes away completely. But there's a price you pay for that. For me, the fun of having kids and a healthy family is greater than the desire to fuck it all up by chasing hotties around. Some guys are different.
Can you find a girl that's open minded and will agree with you about an open relationship? Sure. If you're not interested in exploring the path of a long term committed relationship, then who cares? But if you do want to experience a long term committed relationship, it's frigging hard to make that work while enjoying a lot of different sexual partners along the way. Not impossible, but, very, very difficult.
-------------------- "The universe is endless, limitless and infinite. Any effort to define it's boundaries is an attempt to overcome ignorance. We are physical, mental and spiritual beings ... there is no beginning and there is no end. There is only memory. Our repeated loss of memory experiences create the illusion of beginnings and ends. Immortality is the ability to retain full memory through all consciousness transformations. Loss of memory is man's greatest curse and, in very real terms, death." -- Ancient Taoist Master
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ThatKidWithTheFace
R.I.P. ZIG R.I.P. Sloth


Registered: 09/30/12
Posts: 11,904
Loc: All Good in Allgood
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: Relationship - steadily aroused by other girls [Re: urbanguru]
#23970863 - 12/31/16 01:53 PM (7 years, 30 days ago) |
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Quote:
urbanguru said: Ive been with my girl for 8 years and I am still constantly attracted to other women. Its not something that a man can help as its in our genes to spread the seed far and wide to proliferate the species. That being said the thought of hurting my significant other overpowers any urges I may have and thats the end of it. In other words, when you find the right partner you will still have those feelings but may be unable to act on them out of simple love and respect.
It must be different for everyone. Once I found my current girl, I have had no desire to be with anyone else.
I did not think I would ever find someone so sexually compatible. If I had a desire for other women, she'd be cool with working something out. But I just don't. I honestly feel like the best sex with someone else would still be a down grade.
-------------------- Check Out My Beats SoundCloud
[quote]Sheekle said: [quote]ThatKidWithTheFace said: Is this the same aunt that fucks dogs?[/quote] u bet ur ass it is.[/quote]
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