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OfflineNorthernsoul
Your Reality

Registered: 11/17/01
Posts: 2,290
Loc: Inner Eye
Last seen: 6 years, 4 months
She'll just find out the REAL me and dump me (A little long)
    #2380532 - 02/26/04 07:14 PM (13 years, 2 months ago)

Id really apreciate it if some of you took the time to read this through. Soak up the info that hits you the hardest (from experience) and leave the rest behind. This is really bugging me and Im counting on you guys! Thanks.  :sun:

Anyone here ever ask someone out, go on a few dates and start realizing as each day goes by that the person your dating is alot more atractive (and im not talking looks) than you first realized? And then as time goes on, and you become more atracted to them, you start worrying about losing them?
Well thats me!
Thats not the real question I wanted to get though.
I dont know if its just me, but all of a sudden she's been less enthusiastic about our whole relationship. Im thinking it may just be that time of the month?!
But her Dads a cop, and Im sort of a Bum (as some peope call it) I grow mushrooms and sell them sometimes. I hang out alot, do nothing....I also have severe depression etc and as recently as december I admited myself because I was feeling so shitty.

Am I just paranoid that she will find out (the REAL me) that I have a mental disability? And that I sometimes get involved with the wrong crowds etc? And that her dads a cop thinking he'll look me up somehow (through the grapevine) that i havent been at the best of my behaviour this year? AM I JUST PARANOID??
Im thinking its just my low self-cocept and self-esteem. Its not nearly as bad as it used to be but still gets me into these ruts sometimes.........can the cop dad find out that I need methadone treatment?!

I know that that shit is confidential, but its that daughter father thing. I bet he'd check into me, dont you think?

Blagh, theres NOTHING wrong with the REAL me anyways! Im a very giving, curtious, sensitive, compasionate, romantic, guy, with a good sense of humor, very artistic and asperations and dreams just like everyone else !!

What do you think? Maybe its just my mental illness talking and its just a real bad conception, not reality....


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When it comes
I'll know, I know
Just take my clothes and leave
And I'll be gone




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OfflineEMERLAD
Stranger
Registered: 02/18/04
Posts: 11
Last seen: 13 years, 1 month
Re: She'll just find out the REAL me and dump me (A little long) [Re: Northernsoul]
    #2381194 - 02/26/04 10:59 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

I think that maybe you are subconsciously giving off vibes that you are scared of losing her. If you are desperate not to lose her then she will be able to read that, and it is a scary and an off putting emotion to have to deal with.......someone needing you, rather than wanting you.
I am the same. When I fall for someone I get terrified of losing that person and it makes me go a bit crazy. The best way is to get to terms with non-attachment-a concept in many religions. It has helped me not to hold on to people too strongly, but just to love them for the time they are with me, however long that may be.


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Offlineshaggy101
Male

Registered: 08/17/00
Posts: 1,816
Loc: ..still waiting for godot
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
Re: She'll just find out the REAL me and dump me (A little long) [Re: Northernsoul]
    #2381434 - 02/27/04 12:13 AM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Hey man, it all depends on how much YOU like her..ya dig?
From what it sounds like you like her alot..and see future potential.

Look I say this because of what you say about taking it from your own experience.

For me ive found alot of girls ive been with interesting, hot(obviously :wink:) and like I maybe  could  love them but that feeling never really happened till last year.

It kinda snuk up on me..one minute thinking damn shes hot..them the next I just couldnt imagine losing her(which is exactly what happened :sad:)
bah, anyway.. the reason I lost her is I doubted myself..thats it, nothing else.

Quote:

Blagh, theres NOTHING wrong with the REAL me anyways! Im a very giving, curtious, sensitive, compasionate, romantic, guy, with a good sense of humor, very artistic and asperations and dreams just like everyone else !!






remember that man!
anytime you feel down..cause if you lose her, and remember how cool you are down the road..youll never forgive yourself for losing it back then.


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OfflineFrog
Warrior
Female User Gallery

Registered: 10/22/03
Posts: 4,284
Loc: The Zero Point Field
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: She'll just find out the REAL me and dump me (A little long) [Re: Northernsoul]
    #2387724 - 02/29/04 12:23 AM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Be yourself! If you are meant to lose her because you are yourself, than that is meant to be!

What are you supposed to do? Figure out how to be whoever it is that she wants you to be so that you don't lose her?

Dating isn't about finding and keeping the person that you date. Dating is about seeing if you are compatible with that person. Sometimes, one may see the other as perfect, but the other may not find that to be the same case.

Be yourself. Be good, but don't be someone you're not. If she likes "you", she'll stick around.


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The day will come when, after harnessing the ether, the winds, the tides, gravitation, we shall harness for God the energies of love. And, on that day, for the second time in the history of the world, man will have discovered fire.  -Teilard


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Offlinedaba
Stranger
 User Gallery

Registered: 12/30/02
Posts: 3,881
Last seen: 4 years, 3 months
Re: She'll just find out the REAL me and dump me (A little l [Re: Frog]
    #2388262 - 02/29/04 06:32 AM (13 years, 1 month ago)

I was about to type the exact same thing, Frog. :tongue2: Please, stop stealing my lines. I would rather you contradict me so there would be discussion rather than this mundane sulking I now must bear. :rolleyes: :beer:

Oh and NorthernSoul:  your post isn't nearly as long as some of the posts in the S&P forum :lol:.


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Fold for The Shroomery!


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OfflineNorthernsoul
Your Reality

Registered: 11/17/01
Posts: 2,290
Loc: Inner Eye
Last seen: 6 years, 4 months
Re: She'll just find out the REAL me and dump me (A little l [Re: daba]
    #2396276 - 03/02/04 07:49 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Ok, thanks for the feedback. Actually, every post on this thread helped me, so thanks:)
I've given her a little room to do what she wants. I call her everyonce in a while during the week to say hi, but other than that we just go out on Saturdays (Her only day off from work and school). So far it's beek ok I suppose, shes always into doing something when she's free and we seem to get along when were together. We both are sort of quiet and withdrawn, so I think it's good for both of us to get some social stimulation by doing things together.

Anyways, thanks again.
:thumbup: :eyemouth:


--------------------


--------------------------------------------------------------

When it comes
I'll know, I know
Just take my clothes and leave
And I'll be gone




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Offlineshr00m
junglisT 2 thefUll3st

Registered: 05/01/03
Posts: 801
Last seen: 7 years, 10 months
Re: She'll just find out the REAL me and dump me (A little l [Re: Northernsoul]
    #2400212 - 03/03/04 09:59 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

yea one thing i noticed too is that we guys dont want to lose the girl. if its more then looks. and u arent shallow.

im currently on a new relationship. and we have been thru a lot of shit ina fewdays. i dont want to lose her at all. and its pretty hard. but what i do is mostly tend to do what she wants to do. like hang out but if i find out that she doesn't want to hang out excessively then keep it down. but thats only the beginning.

lifes a fucking trip. all you can do is give it your best shots with little to no regrets.
keep living man~


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