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OfflineIAMNOTALLAMA
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Registered: 09/28/16
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What's your imaginary reptile's name?
    #23782217 - 10/29/16 09:55 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

So I just went over to pet store to pick up some coir. Grabbed a bunch and went to the checkout line.

This was the subsequent conversation with the cute cashier.

"Oh that's a lot of coir. Whats that for?"
"Reptile bedding"
"I know that. I mean, what kind of reptile?"
"Uhm...snakes."
"That's so cool! I have nine snakes! How many do you have?"
"...Five...?"
"What kind are they?"
"Boas...?"
"What kind of boas?"
"Albinos...?"
"All of them? What are their names?"
"Oscar"
"They are all named Oscar?"
"Uhm yeah. My little cousin insists they are all named Oscar"
"Oh that's so sweet. I'd love to see them sometime."
"Yeah, they are pretty great."
"Well anyways, here's my number. Give me a call sometime!"

Guess I may need to get some snakes and a child actor. Can you rent snakes?

:facepalm:


--------------------
"It stands as one of the richer ironies of the drug war that the creation of a powerful new taboo against marijuana led directly to the creation of a powerful new plant" - The Botany of Desire



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Offlinemrmazdarx9
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: IAMNOTALLAMA]
    #23782239 - 10/29/16 10:07 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Just say use it for plants usually dont wanna talk to gardeners :rofl:


--------------------
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InvisibleInocuole
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: IAMNOTALLAMA]
    #23782249 - 10/29/16 10:12 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

:elderno:


--------------------
                            :rainbowdrink: Tea doesn't work?                            AMU  (Q & A)                  Grain prep for Intergalactic Space Oats :pes:     

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InvisibleTeemo 6T3
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: mrmazdarx9] * 2
    #23782257 - 10/29/16 10:20 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Just tell her that you done did skinned them already and you work as a breeder for gucci or something. :lol:

Chicas love bags and shii.. :vato:


--------------------
Shrooming Is Of The Essence


Rest In Peace Dankington


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InvisiblemushboyMDiscord
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: Teemo 6T3]
    #23782286 - 10/29/16 10:37 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

tell them to shut the fuck up and take your money.

or just pull the uhh my wife sent me in i have no idea.

wtf @ this thread:whattefuck2:


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OfflinePortabellaFella 1
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: mushboy]
    #23782340 - 10/29/16 10:58 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

I would have told the dude running the cash register he couldn't come over but hey, I wasn't there.


--------------------
I would like to acquire anything I don’t have


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Offlinemrmazdarx9
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: PortabellaFella 1]
    #23782353 - 10/29/16 11:07 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Sounds like they were coming on to you


--------------------
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InvisiblemushboyMDiscord
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: mrmazdarx9]
    #23782359 - 10/29/16 11:10 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

damn. if she was really hot, id just be honest.

'i grow mushrooms'
  'zoomg, heres my tits'
'damn baby!'


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Invisibler.lutece
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: mushboy]
    #23782381 - 10/29/16 11:24 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

That's true; anyone in the service industry can tell you that you might tell us you're gonna go home and shoot heroin and we could not care less.


--------------------
One goes into an experiment knowing one might fail.
But one does not undertake an experiment knowing one HAS failed.


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Offlinecr1s1s
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: r.lutece]
    #23782565 - 10/29/16 12:47 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

This thread oh my god.  :rofl:  :rofl:  :rofl:

This was always my imaginary excuse.

"What are you building?"
"A terrarium."
"For what?"
"A lizard."
"What are those holes for?"
"For air. Goddamn why are you asking so many questions?"

"Oh he's in there, just keep looking. It's just the kind of reptile that burrows. And spins webs. Wait, no it's my pet spiders. The sydney funnel web. Yeah."


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Invisiblemorty422
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: cr1s1s]
    #23782587 - 10/29/16 12:57 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

:whoak:


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OfflineTh3Issu3
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: cr1s1s]
    #23782589 - 10/29/16 12:57 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

that's great!

i go through the same sort of shit all the time buying rye grain or other odds and ends..


wow 300 lbs of grain, what are you using that for

um...my grandmother asked me to pick it up for her....

or the wow 20 plastic tubs, what are those all for.
um..im moving and carboard makes me break out


Edited by Th3Issu3 (10/29/16 12:59 PM)


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InvisiblemushboyMDiscord
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: mushboy]
    #23782618 - 10/29/16 01:06 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

mushboy said:
tell them to shut the fuck up and take your money.




:whathesaid:


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Invisiblemorty422
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: Th3Issu3]
    #23782623 - 10/29/16 01:07 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Th3Issu3 said:

or the wow 20 plastic tubs, what are those all for.
um..im moving and carboard makes me break out




:lmafo:


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Offlinecr1s1s
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: morty422]
    #23782636 - 10/29/16 01:11 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Someone did ask me this at some health food store before when I bought like 25 lbs of grains before. I was in the checkout line and this lady was like "What are all those grains for?" So I was just like straight up "Mushroom cultivation" and she was like "Oh.".


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OfflineNDStepp84
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: IAMNOTALLAMA] * 1
    #23782945 - 10/29/16 03:17 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Invite her over and show her your whitesnake  :dickslap:


--------------------

"I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do.
-Robert A. Heinlein 

:takingnotes: Links and teks:takingnotes:
ND's grow log and discussion
Plant thread


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Offlinemrmazdarx9
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: NDStepp84]
    #23782996 - 10/29/16 03:37 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

The old purple headed yogurt spitter :lmao:


--------------------
COCA GROWERS come here and share your knowledge
COCA GROWERS UNITE
:penis:Click here for UK trades:penis:
:penis: need some supplies in the UK check Here or PM me:penis:
UK OTD uk members chat
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Right Here
If you use "SWIM" you should DROWN


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InvisiblebodhisattaMDiscordReddit
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: mrmazdarx9] * 1
    #23783027 - 10/29/16 03:50 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

tell them it's for a mobile meth lab and then laugh weirdly right in their face. bonus points if your saliva makes it on their face.


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Offlineenlightenment
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: bodhisatta]
    #23783030 - 10/29/16 03:51 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

:rofl2:


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InvisibleHappyCat
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: IAMNOTALLAMA]
    #23783139 - 10/29/16 04:32 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

:geicogecko:  GooGoo The Dinosaur :troo:

By the way that's gonna be about treefidy.



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InvisibleInocuole
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: HappyCat]
    #23784503 - 10/30/16 06:20 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Frankly I am shocked and confused at why this is not locked.  But, get it out of your systems I guess.. holy shit..


--------------------
                            :rainbowdrink: Tea doesn't work?                            AMU  (Q & A)                  Grain prep for Intergalactic Space Oats :pes:     

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Invisiblenatedawgnow
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: bodhisatta]
    #23784585 - 10/30/16 07:29 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

bodhisatta said:
tell them it's for a mobile meth lab and then laugh weirdly right in their face. bonus points if your saliva makes it on their face.



:lol: solid gold.

I don't see why it needs to be locked. It's funny and it's not like op said
or did anything against the rules


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InvisiblemushboyMDiscord
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: natedawgnow] * 1
    #23784662 - 10/30/16 08:33 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

how does this thread have more views/post then ones with actual information..??
(hint hint my thread about cracker dry)

A. has nothing to do with cult.
B. inane shit goes in the pub.
C. nothing to do with cult.
D. if you fumble while buying something like coco
  how are you going to act when someone with authority
  asks you about something more serious?
E. nothing to do with cultivation.

ALSO for someone who works/has worked in retail management...
employees need to stfu when asking people why they buy stuff.
its annoying and no ones business.

Quote:

mushboy said:
Quote:

mushboy said:
tell them to shut the fuck up and take your money.




:whathesaid:



:whathesaid:


Edited by mushboy (10/30/16 08:41 AM)


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Invisiblenatedawgnow
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: mushboy]
    #23784715 - 10/30/16 08:55 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Testy this morning huh?

I agree that clerks need to mind their own business but i don't see how a
"valid excuse" thread isn't cult related. If we had a thread that trained
noobs how to answer incriminating questions that will aid in keeping heat
off our hobby, why would that be bad or not cult related?

I've noticed a real big chip starting to develope on cult's shoulder, lately


--------------------


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Invisibleamidogen
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: natedawgnow]
    #23784788 - 10/30/16 09:25 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

.


--------------------
The biggest trip of my life was realizing all of the events and actions described in posts made by this account were never real and had never actually happened, but were instead the delusional ramblings of a severely mentally ill human being. I just had to move on for my own good. I love you all.


Edited by amidogen (04/19/18 12:38 PM)


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OfflineIAMNOTALLAMA
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: amidogen]
    #23784850 - 10/30/16 09:51 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Oh chill out. People can enjoy a light hearted post while helping others. If it is against the rules, my bad, but maybe just let it be. Go after the ppl posting about contamination problems in this forum?


--------------------
"It stands as one of the richer ironies of the drug war that the creation of a powerful new taboo against marijuana led directly to the creation of a powerful new plant" - The Botany of Desire



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Invisibleamidogen
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: IAMNOTALLAMA]
    #23784890 - 10/30/16 10:07 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

.


--------------------
The biggest trip of my life was realizing all of the events and actions described in posts made by this account were never real and had never actually happened, but were instead the delusional ramblings of a severely mentally ill human being. I just had to move on for my own good. I love you all.


Edited by amidogen (04/19/18 12:38 PM)


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OfflineIAMNOTALLAMA
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: mushboy]
    #23784899 - 10/30/16 10:11 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

mushboy said:
how does this thread have more views/post then ones with actual information..??
(hint hint my thread about cracker dry)




I did see your post about cracker dry today (err last night); also today I found out it is true and informative.


--------------------
"It stands as one of the richer ironies of the drug war that the creation of a powerful new taboo against marijuana led directly to the creation of a powerful new plant" - The Botany of Desire



Edited by IAMNOTALLAMA (10/30/16 10:13 AM)


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InvisiblebodhisattaMDiscordReddit
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: IAMNOTALLAMA]
    #23784904 - 10/30/16 10:14 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

This forum is mushroom cultivation. Contamination questions belong here. The contamination forum is neglected shit.


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OfflineGreg
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: bodhisatta]
    #23784907 - 10/30/16 10:16 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

I like how cult general discussion got locked several times but this thread goes untouched.
This has less than dick all to do with cultivation, maybe mods haven't seen it yet...

Go tell the people in pub what your imaginary reptile is named because mushrooms don't give a shit, and they're what we're here for aren't they?


Edited by Greg (10/30/16 10:25 AM)


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OfflineSloppyJoseph
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: IAMNOTALLAMA]
    #23784923 - 10/30/16 10:20 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

I thought it was pretty funny. We've all been there, but sometimes I just straight up say I grow oyster mushrooms. People seem to be really interested and I don't have to [fully] lie.

You should hit her up. See if you can get anywhere on the first date at her place before she insists on going to see your 5 ALBINO boas :rofl::rofl:


--------------------
AMU Q&A


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OfflineIAMNOTALLAMA
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: bodhisatta]
    #23784927 - 10/30/16 10:21 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

And that is not my fault. I do try to help with contam posts if I can. If ppl want to be in this thread for a min, then so be it.


--------------------
"It stands as one of the richer ironies of the drug war that the creation of a powerful new taboo against marijuana led directly to the creation of a powerful new plant" - The Botany of Desire



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InvisiblebodhisattaMDiscordReddit
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: Greg]
    #23784931 - 10/30/16 10:23 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Greg said:
I like how cult general discussion got locked several times but this thread goes untouched.
This has less than dick all to do with cultivation, maybe mods haven't seen it yet...

Go tell the people in pub what your imaginary reptile is named because mushrooms don't give a shit, and they're what we're here for aren't they?



Probably because no flaming yet


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OfflineGreg
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: bodhisatta]
    #23784939 - 10/30/16 10:26 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Yeah, that sorta makes sense.
Still this is just so off topic...


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InvisiblebodhisattaMDiscordReddit
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: Greg]
    #23784951 - 10/30/16 10:30 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Yes well. Tis MC


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InvisibleHappyCat
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: SloppyJoseph]
    #23784964 - 10/30/16 10:35 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

SloppyJoseph said:
I thought it was pretty funny. We've all been there, but sometimes I just straight up say I grow oyster mushrooms. People seem to be really interested and I don't have to [fully] lie.

You should hit her up. See if you can get anywhere on the first date at her place before she insists on going to see your 5 ALBINO boas :rofl::rofl:




Yea grow edibles while you're at it, mark your shit with abstract marks if you need to differentiate it, if someone did happen across your stuff, "its all oysters" or something else, so unless they have a microscope in their pocket, and advanced knowledge of mycology, I doubt they'll want to call bullshit on you.

Cover your ass with legit activity and get food at the same time, and if you're some poor student reading this in some distant future, you could probably use the food more than the actives anyway lolz.


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OfflineTerpfreak
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: Inocuole]
    #23785012 - 10/30/16 10:49 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

morty422 said:
:whoak:




Quote:

Inocuole said:
:elderno:




Damn it, too good.


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OfflineMushierage
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: Terpfreak]
    #23785089 - 10/30/16 11:21 AM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Ask them if they want to see your pet dicks.  OR... if they want to pet your dick.


--------------------
Don't like researching posts? Read this! . Also, if you're new and your posts contain the words: Humidifer, incubator, air-stone, or heater, then you need to read and UTFSE before asking people to review your setup.  OR... You should be cultivating reptiles and fish, not mushrooms.



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Invisiblenatedawgnow
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: amidogen]
    #23785309 - 10/30/16 12:31 PM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

amidogen said:
We have better than just a thread. We have an entire forum dedicated to people who want to keep the heat off when they participate in this hobby:
https://www.shroomery.org/forums/postlist.php/Board/46

You're really going to tell me you think the jokes posted in here are what you can call advice for keeping heat off you anyways? I don't think you can genuinely say this thread amounts to one where we give advice for staying clear of suspicion for growing actives, nor that it was ever intended to be such a thread.

And I'm sorry. I don't care how paranoid you are, unless you're involved in mush cult yourself, your mind would never in a million years go to "hey this dude is gathering supplies to cultivate active mushrooms since I asked him what this coir/verm/quart jars/basic mycology supply is for and he blanked out on a reason momentarily. On my break from selling dog food I'm gonna call the cops and give them my hot tip"

:justno:

The only thing I could see that happening with is a PC since people love to use them for blowing other people up lately.



My response was to people saying this needs to be locked, as if it is
breaking rules. Then i went on to say "if" we had a thread dedicated to such
a topic, it wouldn't be bad.

Don't fall victim to that chip bro!


--------------------


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InvisibleTeemo 6T3
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Re: What's your imaginary reptile's name? [Re: SloppyJoseph]
    #23785562 - 10/30/16 01:53 PM (7 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

SloppyJoseph said:
first date at her place before she insists on going to see your 5 ALBINO boas :rofl::rofl:



She's into Black mambas bro


--------------------
Shrooming Is Of The Essence


Rest In Peace Dankington


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