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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

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Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women?
#23753756 - 10/20/16 12:51 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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I think it's healthy to explore your sexuality, not just think because you're a man you must stick to women, and vice versa. Guys say they would never do some gay shit with another guy because they're manly and only mess with girls, but the only reason they say this is because they're programmed to think this way and scared of experimentation and what it might mean if they enjoy the gay encounter. I mean how can you know if you would like something unless you have tried it?
What if they took a substance and it lowered their guard, then they had a gay session with a friend and were aroused throughout it, then afterwards they can figure out what that meant to them.
But I am curious if having homosexual encounters actually opens up a feminine side in men which allows them to understand women better, that is if they don't have a gay experience and then prefer men afterwards.
What are your thoughts on this?
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Edited by Lucis (10/20/16 12:53 AM)
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JacksonMetaller
Stranger

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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Lucis]
#23754100 - 10/20/16 06:59 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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I don't have a direct answer for you. But I feel like any sort of defensive masculine nonsense like that probably doesn't translate well to the bedroom in any situation. If you have that many guards and that much to prove are you really going to be paying attention to what your woman wants or your own masculine presentation? But then again not every man who makes such declarations actually thinks that way behind closed doors.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Lucis]
#23754143 - 10/20/16 07:33 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Fennario said: Guys say they would never do some gay shit with another guy because they're manly and only mess with girls, but the only reason they say this is because they're programmed to think this way and scared of experimentation and what it might mean if they enjoy the gay encounter. I mean how can you know if you would like something unless you have tried it?
I disagree with this Fen. I've never once had so much as a gay fantasy as I'm just not attracted to men that way. I can recognise a good looking man, but there's just none of the polarity that turns me on sexually there. The only exception would be a full post op trans gender female, but they'd have to be indistinguishable from a true female for me to be aroused enough to pursue such an encounter, so I'm not really sure that even counts.
I mean, with the argument about having tried it, some things one does not have to try to know one would not enjoy it. It's like saying how could I know I wouldn't enjoy ballet cause I've never tried it.. I don't need to try some things in this life to know they wouldn't work for me.. And I'm a great tryer of things in this life.
As for making you better with women, I'm not so sure it would. The things I've found in this life that have improved my relationships with women were never physical activities (although they often resulted in improvement in that area) - learning a deep empathy, and ability to listen and respond in a measured manner - those are key IMO.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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ohcrapitsnico
The Other One


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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Lucis] 2
#23755060 - 10/20/16 02:25 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Having a lot of true bisexual friends, I'm pretty sure they have better sex than people who are on either side of the fence. They're the most sexually liberated and sexually confident people I know.
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Chakra Shock
Waxing Prophetic


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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Lucis] 2
#23755111 - 10/20/16 02:42 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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In my experience, practicing one creative discipline has always helped me in my other creative practices as well. For instance, I memorized a poem recently, and then I found that this lyrical familiarity was helping me to come up with new melodies on my instrument. Perhaps there's something similar in sexuality?
However, I like what JSB was saying about the most important skills in relationships, even ephemeral sexual encounters, being character traits like empathy, listening and balanced measures of expression.
One more thing I agree with is that a lot of men are programmed to reject the idea of homosexuality because it threatens their masculinity. Not that that's every heterosexual guy's reason for their sexuality, I'm sure there are people who just don't have a gay bone in their body, but I believe that there are far more men who would actually explore homosexuality than there are currently doing so if it was more socially accepted by themselves and their peers.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Chakra Shock]
#23755364 - 10/20/16 04:00 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Chakra Shock said: I believe that there are far more men who would actually explore homosexuality than there are currently doing so if it was more socially accepted by themselves and their peers.
I like this - more an examination of the shades of grey rather than the black and white ends of the spectrum. I absolutely agree; for one reason or another, same sex explorations for men are still severely frowned upon in our society. It brings up misanthropic feelings when I think of how hard it must be for guys to come out as gay - I hate that our culture makes it this way.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Ezuma
Gontish Wizard



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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: ohcrapitsnico] 2
#23755367 - 10/20/16 04:02 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
ohcrapitsnico said: Having a lot of true bisexual friends, I'm pretty sure they have better sex than people who are on either side of the fence. They're the most sexually liberated and sexually confident people I know.
i would expect this to be the case, but perhaps not because they're bi, but rather because they're open enough and secure enough to be bi, and its the openness and security that enriches their sex life
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Ezuma] 2
#23755384 - 10/20/16 04:08 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Ezuma said: its the openness and security that enriches their sex life
Openness and security are life enriching, sexually or emotionally.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Sheekle
FREE BURKE



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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Lucis] 1
#23756034 - 10/20/16 08:26 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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ive never felt i got in touch with my more feminine side or anything after getting jerked off by guys, which i enjoyed
-------------------- "Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods "I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago "you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard "The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist "Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft "or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16
Edited by Sheekle (10/23/16 09:45 AM)
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36fuckin5
Alchemycologist


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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Lucis]
#23756389 - 10/20/16 10:27 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Fennario said: Guys say they would never do some gay shit with another guy because they're manly and only mess with girls, but the only reason they say this is because they're programmed to think this way and scared of experimentation and what it might mean if they enjoy the gay encounter. I mean how can you know if you would like something unless you have tried it?
What if they took a substance and it lowered their guard, then they had a gay session with a friend and were aroused throughout it, then afterwards they can figure out what that meant to them.
I can't speak for anyone else, but not all straight males are avoiding it because of social pressure. Personally, guys just don't make my weiner wiggle. It's really that simple.
If you take a substance and your inhibitions are lowered to the point of a homosexual encounter, then you should probably check it out and see what's up because you likely had those feelings to begin with. I've never personally experienced that, but if I did I'd go with it for a minute and see how it fit me.
-------------------- Redd Foxx said: If you're offended I don't give a shit and don't come see me no more. Pat The Bunny said: A punk rock song won't ever change the world, but I can tell you about a couple that changed me. bodhisatta said: i recommend common sense and figuring it out. These are the TEKs I use. They're all as cheap and easy as possible, just like your mom.
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koods
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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Sheekle] 4
#23756783 - 10/21/16 02:02 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Sheekle said: ive never felt i got in touch with my more feminine side or anything after getting jerked off by guys, which i enjoyed
Getting jerked off by randos is completely devoid of any emotional content or consequences. You're not going to get in touch with your emotions if you are designing your encounters to be emotion free zones. You're not having gay encounters, youre just letting someone else do the work of getting you off.
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NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
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Repertoire89
Cat



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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Lucis]
#23756898 - 10/21/16 03:33 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Fennario said:I mean how can you know if you would like something unless you have tried it?
I have no idea how to answer the thread title, intuitively I would think it would help, but 
As far as knowing your orientation, that's just a sensory thing, I was going crazy over girls in school before I knew what was going on.
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Repertoire89]
#23756925 - 10/21/16 03:53 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Repertoire89 said:
As far as knowing your orientation, that's just a sensory thing, I was going crazy over girls in school before I knew what was going on.
I am not oriented with any one side or thing, if you're hot your hot regardless of gender, labels on sexuality are stupid.
Love transcends all sexual labels, just go with it, be love, a love supreme, stop seeing man or woman and see the beauty of their being, see love, be love.
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Repertoire89
Cat



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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Lucis]
#23756938 - 10/21/16 04:01 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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I don't think those labels are arbitrary, it seems biological to me
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Repertoire89]
#23756948 - 10/21/16 04:20 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said:As for making you better with women, I'm not so sure it would. The things I've found in this life that have improved my relationships with women were never physical activities (although they often resulted in improvement in that area) - learning a deep empathy, and ability to listen and respond in a measured manner - those are key IMO.
Yes I agree that the meat of a relationship is founded in proper communication, with the physical stuff coming somewhere after that, I didn't mean physical anyway, I meant being better with women in all ways.
I knew a guy who was bisexual and after having a gay experience with his friend, his wife said he was like a whole new man to her and could understand everything about her better, he was more feminine after that experience, and this led to a happier marriage between the two. It was like some spiritual thing happened inside of the guy, his sun married his moon, he was light and dark, he was masculine and feminine combined, he was complete.
Quote:
Repertoire89 said: I don't think those labels are arbitrary, it seems biological to me
Break free from your humanity my friend, be something greater.
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
#23756954 - 10/21/16 04:28 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said: I disagree with this Fen. I've never once had so much as a gay fantasy as I'm just not attracted to men that way.
Neither have I, that's not what I am talking about. I think if you have gay fantasies about men, then you without a doubt gay, but if you experiment with a guy to see what that's about, then you know yourself better afterwards. How could experimentation like that not make you understand yourself better?
I think when you experiment with your sexuality, you learn a lot about love, and this can be eye opening.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Lucis]
#23756960 - 10/21/16 04:31 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Fennario said: It was like some spiritual thing happened inside of the guy, his sun married his moon, he was light and dark, he was masculine and feminine combined, he was complete.
I can empathise with this; getting in touch with the feminine aspects of myself has been a challenge for me, but one which has yielded incredible results in practice. It's a challenge we should all face, IMO, as internally I believe our energy sits somewhere on the spectrum between the masculine and feminine poles, however society would rather we be programmed into our place, rather than finding it ourselves.
None the less, I don't believe that same sex sexual encounters, for either gender, are a prerequisite to this kind of self exploration. Perhaps it helped your pal, but perhaps if he'd explored it prior to his encounter, he would have found it anyway. Maybe it wouldn't have been such a sudden change, but a more gradual one, as it has been for me.
Quote:
Fennario said: but if you experiment with a guy to see what that's about, then you know yourself better afterwards
It's like saying if you torture yourself, you'll know yourself better afterwards. Perhaps you might, but there's absolutely nothing about a sexual encounter with a man that makes me want to pursue it, so why would I?
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Repertoire89
Cat



Registered: 11/15/12
Posts: 21,773
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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Lucis]
#23756966 - 10/21/16 04:35 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Fennario said:
Quote:
Repertoire89 said: I don't think those labels are arbitrary, it seems biological to me
Break free from your humanity my friend, be something greater.
Having sex with a woman I found unattractive, was regrettable, it really messed with my head for a few months 
Attraction is everything
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Repertoire89]
#23756973 - 10/21/16 04:42 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said: It's like saying if you torture yourself, you'll know yourself better afterwards.
Quote:
Repertoire89 said: Having sex with a woman I found unattractive, was regrettable, it really messed with my head for a few months
I rest my case.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

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Re: Does having homosexual encounters make you better with women? [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
#23756979 - 10/21/16 04:46 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said:
It's like saying if you torture yourself, you'll know yourself better afterwards. Perhaps you might, but there's absolutely nothing about a sexual encounter with a man that makes me want to pursue it, so why would I?
If you tortured yourself, you without a doubt know more about yourself afterwards.
I have had friends that have experimented with guys and within a minute of making out with a guy knew it wasn't for them, by I applaud them for giving it a try, for having the courage to think outside the box.
I have had friends that have experimented with guys and they felt the same thing when making out with them as they did for a woman, but they didn't prefer guys after that. I think the guys that felt the same thing they felt when making out with a woman, were feeling love, and allowing it to envelope their being, rather than fight it. It's like an energy of some sort (love), and can overwhelm a person if they allow it too.
I probably shouldn't be posting now though due to lack of sleep.
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