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Trippedytrip
TrippedyTrip



Registered: 09/07/15
Posts: 514
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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I am taking Suicide as an option guys
#23747871 - 10/18/16 03:44 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Hello there ,
After my 2nd shroom trip 3,5 something went really wrong.
My brain got stuck in the momemt due to a panic situation.
My brain got stuck and since that trip i havnt been normal again.
There is no point of living like this anymore cause i cant function normal in day to day life , i completely isolated and my brain doesnt reset to normal again .
What can i do ? I am very hopeless
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Nobler Hino
a dojo and a forge?!


Registered: 08/29/15
Posts: 1,780
Loc: Deep Ellum
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip] 2
#23747919 - 10/18/16 04:40 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Stop doing drugs
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   "The sacred mushroom takes me by the hand and brings me to the world where everything is known. It is they, the sacred mushrooms, that speak in a way I can understand. I ask them and they answer me.” – Maria Sabina
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SkagitHunter
Forager


Registered: 09/30/14
Posts: 725
Loc: PNW
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Nobler Hino]
#23747928 - 10/18/16 04:53 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Seek professional help. Now.
Suicide Prevention Hotline 1-800-273-8255
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JacksonMetaller
Stranger

Registered: 03/13/11
Posts: 13,361
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: SkagitHunter]
#23747960 - 10/18/16 05:31 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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That sort of thing isn't uncommon. Some will tell you to stop taking drugs, some will say you need to take them again in a more controlled manner so you can work through the issue. I'm not sure what route is best for you but what i do know is you're going to be okay and you should not be thinking about suicide right now. A bad trip can trigger a sort of PTSD reaction that can take some time to work through. I have had some truly horrible experiences at very high doses and thought i would never be normal again but i am. For me, reexposure helped. But at much lower doses, in much more comfortable settings. Even then it took me a few trips to get through the discomfort. That's just me though. Without knowing more about you and your experience i can't recommend it. Can you explain a little more about what happened and what you experience day to day since then?
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Trippedytrip
TrippedyTrip



Registered: 09/07/15
Posts: 514
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Thats a good answer thanks .
The trip was confusing , the set setting was good but it broke when 2 friends came screaming from my friend and then things scrambled up .
I was on mute , didnt get a thing , just confused . That passed after a while , we changed setting and i finally enjoyed the rest of the trip.
After that tripp , something was different , i didnt feel as good as before something was wrong .
Months passed by i got less active , weird , had kind of a "breakdown" cause i was so confused in looking for a answer cause i knew something was strange . After a while people also saw it , i kept smoking pot , the pot high was different , more as a shroom high .
Well after that i kept going on trying to go on with life since now.
I have reached a point where my brain got kinda stuck and doesnt run correctly . It is like i can access these memories and it remained kinda stuck in the unconscious.
I have thought a lot about taking a trip since weed doesnt help me and it wont fix it .
I have tried with mdma , helps for the moment but it resets back to the point .
So now i am planning with shrooms because they were wich put me in that situation and if that doesnt work il plan on doing Ayahuasca .
The last 6-7 months have been hell , i cant function normal in this state thats why i see i have nothig really to loose because i can control myself if things get worser... wich is not really possible
So thats it , i also feel disconnected to the source earth sun , human beings to everything
Peace thanks for helping
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SkagitHunter
Forager


Registered: 09/30/14
Posts: 725
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 3 months, 22 days
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip]
#23748095 - 10/18/16 07:21 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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You haven't replied about wether or not you are going to get help. Posting here is reaching out but it barely constitutes help. You NEED professional help. Please call this number, they can point you in the right direction. 1-800-273-8255
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Brian Jones
Club 27



Registered: 12/18/12
Posts: 12,342
Loc: attending Snake Church
Last seen: 12 hours, 12 minutes
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: SkagitHunter]
#23748278 - 10/18/16 08:54 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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You don't have to kill yourself over, for god's sake a shroom trip. I gave my roomates's cat in college catnip for Christmas. Poor Kitty was out of it for days. My rooomate said "brian you broke my cat. Luckily she came back to normal. you will come back to normal too unless you had underlying mental illness (probably not but this the shroomery so who knows). KItty had no underlying mental illness.
-------------------- "The Rolling Stones will break up over Brian Jones' dead body" John Lennon I don't want no commies in my car. No Christians either. The worst thing about corruption is that it works so well,
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wicca mixer
Marmalade, I like marmalade :)



Registered: 07/30/10
Posts: 158
Last seen: 6 years, 10 days
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Brian Jones]
#23748321 - 10/18/16 09:10 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Iv'e been weirded out by acid before and I just kept telling myself that I would get back to normal, and I did get back to normal.
You got to have faith that you will get back to normal, and you will.
It is important that you be headstrong on psychedlics and to realise that you are the one in control. It can be easy to trick yourself into thinking that you are fucked for life, and belief is a powerful thing. You need to believe that you'll get back to normal. I think fear is a big factor in these sort of situations, and sometimes tripping again and make you realise that the fear was needless.
I would much rather take heroic doses of mushrooms on my own than take small doses around people who are bad news to be around whilst tripping. In fact most times I have done mushrooms on my own. When reality gets completely ripped apart and nothing makes sense any more during a strong trip, I know that I will be back to normal again within an hour or two. It's always like I'm tripping hard one moment and then all of a sudden I'm completely back to reality (even though I'm probably still getting the effects from it).
Have faith that you will come back to normality. Don't buy into the fear based thoughts you might have because they are bullshit. For me magic mushrooms are safe as houses and I cannot have a bad trip. I've had some dark trips where I thought I was dying, and then that I had died but I didn't see them as bad trips, rather they were some of the best and most meaningful trips Iv'e ever had.
Just have faith in yourself and that everything is going to be alright. Always go with the flow and never fight it.
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 29 days
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip] 5
#23748373 - 10/18/16 09:34 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Trippedytrip said:
Months passed by i got less active , weird , had kind of a "breakdown" cause i was so confused in looking for a answer cause i knew something was strange . After a while people also saw it , i kept smoking pot , the pot high was different , more as a shroom high .
Stay active, take spirulina and b-vitamin complex daily, drink lots of water (not tap), drink green tea (3-5 cups daily), and stop smoking pot.
Run, run at least 1 mile everyday, strive for a 5K a day (3.1 miles), you don't have to be a speed demon, just get out there and do it, sunshine is healing for the mind.
I found that by staying active with something everyday, improves my mental health greatly, so if I don't run, cycle, or workout for a day, I walk. Yesterday and the day before I walked 10 miles each day, which was great to be out and enjoy the autumn weather, and see the leaves changing, smell the autumn air, photograph some mushrooms, and see reflections on the water.
Don't downplay how much healing the natural world holds for you.
If you want to talk via PM, fire away, you wont bother me.
But for the love of all that is holy, don't harm yourself.
-------------------- ©️
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sprinkles
otd president


Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 21,527
Loc: washington state
Last seen: 3 years, 17 days
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip]
#23748428 - 10/18/16 09:52 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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well suicide is kinda like making a bet. Put everything you have on a table, then spin a wheel without having a clue what the payout will be. It could be bad, it could be good, you just don't know. From that perspective it just seems like a really bad gamble. 
i do understand people wanting to commit suicide though, not wanting to spend another second here. Earth is a cumbersome experience for anyone born with a brain. And anyway, when you have nothing to lose why not change some things? you will always have the option tomorrow. I'd wait and see if tomorrow anything changes.
dont drink bottle fucking water. in fact dont touch fucking plastic AT ALL. Or thermal paper for that matter. BPA, BPS... all really fucking bad. shameful.
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: sprinkles]
#23749979 - 10/18/16 07:31 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
sprinkles said:
i do understand people wanting to commit suicide though, not wanting to spend another second here. Earth is a cumbersome experience for anyone born with a brain. And anyway, when you have nothing to lose why not change some things? you will always have the option tomorrow. I'd wait and see if tomorrow anything changes.
This is what has kept me around for 15 years. You can't undo death anymore than you can undo the past. However we can grow and learn from the past to become better people and have better lives. Death ends all chance, all hope, all dreams, all potential, and the unique individual that is you. This planet will never have another you. If you believe in reincarnation - you will never have another you again either. Think about that.
Don't waste yourself just because you don't know what else to do. New doors open all the time my friend. You wouldn't ever know that if you ended it before you had the chance. Give yourself a chance. Work on you. Take the advice of what others have already posted. Take care of yourself. It can be more worth it than you'd ever know to ride out the bumps
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Free time is the only time
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Trippedytrip
TrippedyTrip



Registered: 09/07/15
Posts: 514
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23751110 - 10/19/16 04:22 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Hey guys thanks for the answers ,
I got kinda a PTSD reaction from that trip because i had a panick moment and after it since then i have like lost the magic of the universe , my awareness was pretty much damaged (kinda double vision) and like my body is still in that reaction and doesnt want to chill down and it pretty hard to function.
Weed wont repair it i have tried it .
Mdma didnt repair it .
Yesterday i did 0,7 and i had a good time but didnt see the light .
On that trip i did 3,5 g and i was quite new into it so i guess i must go a little bit deeper to experience what i want and need to live .
Thanks for your support !
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Anonymous #1
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip] 1
#23751243 - 10/19/16 06:49 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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I feel your pain brother, it's not easy.
Not gonna think I have a solution because it's been 10 years and there's still been no cure. But it's gotten better and I've learned to adapt somewhat. Hope that you'll find your groove or don't... I won't look down on you if you choose to end your suffering. A mind tortured by eternity is not a pretty thing in this world.
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Cajun love
Stranger

Registered: 10/14/16
Posts: 177
Last seen: 2 years, 6 months
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23751256 - 10/19/16 07:07 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Man that sucks. Sometimes good sex can break you out of a rut like that.
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip] 1
#23751684 - 10/19/16 11:07 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Man stop doing drugs. Your mind can't reset itself if your throwing it out of balance before it has a chance to recover.
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Free time is the only time
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Trippedytrip
TrippedyTrip



Registered: 09/07/15
Posts: 514
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23751740 - 10/19/16 11:30 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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It cant reset itself normally either i tried every thing
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Nobler Hino
a dojo and a forge?!


Registered: 08/29/15
Posts: 1,780
Loc: Deep Ellum
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: CookieCrumbs] 1
#23751880 - 10/19/16 12:19 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
CookieCrumbs said: Man stop doing drugs. Your mind can't reset itself if your throwing it out of balance before it has a chance to recover.
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   "The sacred mushroom takes me by the hand and brings me to the world where everything is known. It is they, the sacred mushrooms, that speak in a way I can understand. I ask them and they answer me.” – Maria Sabina
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip]
#23752198 - 10/19/16 02:34 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Trippedytrip said: It cant reset itself normally either i tried every thing
It takes time. How long have you gone without drugs? Without any drugs?
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Free time is the only time
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Trippedytrip
TrippedyTrip



Registered: 09/07/15
Posts: 514
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23752336 - 10/19/16 03:28 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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I was 6 months sober .
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip]
#23752351 - 10/19/16 03:39 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Yeah you need to go a year at least. If not 2 or 3. Think of it as having a seizure. Your brain got terribly distorted and it needs time to reorient itself. Then a few months later you have another seizure. That resets your recovery time. When you have a seizure you are more likely afterward to have more seizures until your brain is able to competely stabalize itself. If you have a seizure one day and then have a seizure the very next day that sets you back yet farther and increases your recovery time.
You are not just resetting your recovery time, you are prolonging it.
Think of it as a heart attack or another major health issue. The more they come, especially if they come close one after another, the harder it is to recover from.
Stay sober for AT Least one year. You may be one of these people who just can't take ppsychedelics. Even after your brain completely recovers you may take a hit of acid and go right back to square one.
Stop. Doing. Drugs.
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Free time is the only time
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Anonymous #2
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip]
#23752355 - 10/19/16 03:40 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Bro I know exactly what you are talking about. About a year ago I was tripping hard on lsa like daily or as much as I could. I was so spun every day I didn't even realize how much my brain was changing. I stopped and started to feel hopeless an scared because I pretty much felt like I was tripping all the time and I didn't wanna be. I didn't know what to do and the level of peace and joy I felt from tripping reversed into a fucked up abyss. Someone very experienced with psychedelics came back into my life right when I was about to snap. He gave me a lot of advice but the most important thing he said is "dude its gonna be ok". I honestly thought I was fucked but like once I realized there was honesty nothing to worry about I realized the feelings I was feeling and the things I was seeing were meant to be. Everything is meant to be. You just have to roll with this and not try to fight it and I promise you things will get better. It will fade with time everything does. Its a gift dude that most people don't get.
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Anonymous #2
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #2]
#23752365 - 10/19/16 03:44 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Bro I know exactly what you are talking about. About a year ago I was tripping hard on lsa like daily or as much as I could. I was so spun every day I didn't even realize how much my brain was changing. I stopped and started to feel hopeless an scared because I pretty much felt like I was tripping all the time and I didn't wanna be. I didn't know what to do and the level of peace and joy I felt from tripping reversed into a fucked up abyss. Someone very experienced with psychedelics came back into my life right when I was about to snap. He gave me a lot of advice but the most important thing he said is "dude its gonna be ok". I honestly thought I was fucked but like once I realized there was honesty nothing to worry about I realized the feelings I was feeling and the things I was seeing were meant to be. Everything is meant to be. You just have to roll with this and not try to fight it and I promise you things will get better. It will fade with time everything does. Its a gift dude that most people don't get. Sobriety is your friend right now. Weed may help it helped me but some people smoke and just start tripping again.
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Anonymous #2
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #2]
#23752367 - 10/19/16 03:45 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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lol sorry didn't mean to post twice
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beforethedawn
Registered: 06/19/16
Posts: 1,859
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #2] 1
#23753979 - 10/20/16 04:24 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Honestly life is so beautiful if you just sign out of the culture.
Don't throw it away man.
Just sign out,
dig into the mystery.
Stay grounded. Do your washing, earn your keep, stay close to family.
Then just realise present awareness is Nirvana, only you are kidding yourself otherwise as part of a game.
The feeling of being trapped . . .
the world turns into your mental state, they are the same continuum.
Don't aspire huge,
just keep yourself grounded, keep yourself alive,
forget the world & culture, it's all a lie.
Decondition your mind and explore the mystery. It is harrowing. Many ways to be aware . . .
Come on man . . .
Life is perfect, you'll never actually die, but God will your final moments in this realm be fucked and pointless. You might even end up retarded and unable to consider it again.
Don't kill yourself. Don't ever try. Don't even think about it again.
Just walk on. Get your shit together and walk on.
No one knows what this is.
-------------------- Hostile humankind Can't you see you're fucking blind?
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sprinkles
otd president


Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 21,527
Loc: washington state
Last seen: 3 years, 17 days
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip]
#23754665 - 10/20/16 11:57 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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one more thing. If & when everything else has failed you try asking God for help. Read the bible. Turn your life over to God and Christ. Let the holy spirit go to work. it will take much less effort on your part to achieve the dreams you have.
When you have accepted Christ then you can start asking for positive things to happen in your life. pray with expectation it will be given. Consider it done. If what you are asking is anything close to his will and path it will be given to you. The one thing God wants even more than our belief in him is for us to TRUST him. Lol it's that easy. You wont regret it, no one has.
PS wisdom is gained in failure. Wisdom comes from experience. More experience can be gained from failure than success. LOL if wisdom comes from failure well then I will be one of the smartest humans to ever walk this planet.
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bigdoodie
it does not matter


Registered: 06/24/16
Posts: 238
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip]
#23756058 - 10/20/16 08:35 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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I mean ive never seen a squirrel hanging from a noose, I wonder what their secret is.
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SuperFly
Still in the Space Race



Registered: 05/19/13
Posts: 1,032
Loc: Dark side off the moon
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip]
#23756098 - 10/20/16 08:46 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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maybe try tripping by yourself op?
People seem to set off a bad trip for me. Being not able to handle their trip, fucking with me, or forcing me to do things when I just want to chill and be left alone.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: bigdoodie]
#23756167 - 10/20/16 09:04 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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They don't know what a noose is. Thatse their (non)secret.
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 29 days
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: SuperFly]
#23756996 - 10/21/16 05:00 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
SuperFly said: maybe try tripping by yourself op?
People seem to set off a bad trip for me. Being not able to handle their trip, fucking with me, or forcing me to do things when I just want to chill and be left alone.
I don't know if tripping in a suicidal state of mind should be encouraged, if someone fell into a bad trip, they might harm themselves.
I have had two bad trips my whole tripping career (18 years) and both times were awful, I was in the pit of despair and felt like I would never be happy again, really bad feeling.
I prefer tripping by myself though, or with a handful of good people. I find that tripping by myself to be the most healing.
-------------------- ©️
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Lucis] 1
#23757015 - 10/21/16 05:15 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Fennario said: I have had two bad trips my whole tripping career (18 years) and both times were awful, I was in the pit of despair and felt like I would never be happy again, really bad feeling.
LOL, our 'careers' are of the same duration, contain the same number of bad trips, and we both love mescaline more than any other (which incidentally, might be a consideration for OP - I cannot imagine it being possible to have a bad trip on a low dose of mescal - I just wish it were easier to find for many).
Completely agree about OP not taking any kind of tryptamine, it way too much of an unstable high for such a headstate as he's in.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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sprinkles
otd president


Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 21,527
Loc: washington state
Last seen: 3 years, 17 days
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Lucis]
#23757862 - 10/21/16 12:05 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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i am not a suicidal person at all, and the last time I tripped I was taking a bath and thought I should clean my soul. What I came up with was drinking bleach. Because bleach cleans that would surely clean my soul. Then I thought, no that would be bad. Fire. Yes, thats it. If I light myself on fire that will clean my soul for sure. Thank God I had enough mind and common sense to know that would be really REALLY bad.
This is why I don't use mushrooms. The inability to control your thoughts can potentially be devastating.
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Nobler Hino
a dojo and a forge?!


Registered: 08/29/15
Posts: 1,780
Loc: Deep Ellum
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: sprinkles]
#23758029 - 10/21/16 01:05 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Ive had sick thoughts on shrooms a few times but very briefly and very rarly.
Never thought of hurting myself on them but hurting others only once.
I think your burnt out, give your brain a rest and get involved in something positive, something that makes you enjoy life.
--------------------
   "The sacred mushroom takes me by the hand and brings me to the world where everything is known. It is they, the sacred mushrooms, that speak in a way I can understand. I ask them and they answer me.” – Maria Sabina
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Thayendanegea
quiet walker



Registered: 02/20/12
Posts: 7,596
Loc: 7 Lodges Nation
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Nobler Hino]
#23758068 - 10/21/16 01:23 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Holy fuck Sprinkles...that is pretty scary stuff. Can't say I've ever had any thoughts like that...How was your mind set before you took the mushrooms?...Were they cyans?
-------------------- Look Deep Into Nature,and Then You Will Understand Everything Better. Albert Einstein
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Anonymous #3
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip]
#23758132 - 10/21/16 01:46 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Trippedytrip said: It cant reset itself normally either i tried every thing
Yeah, I know what you mean, I've felt that way for a bit over 15 yrs. Im a coward thou, its easy to dry fire a gun, hard when its loaded. Maybe self preservation, maybe thoughts on how it would impact my family, maybe just simple cowardice.
I've heard all the things said to you in this thread said to me, gave them all chances, trying so hard to believe, to feel happy, or just being able to not feel like my heart was breaking every second.
I dont really understand what it is people are doing with this life. Why have a kid? I lose enough of my life and money on my cat, at least he will never lie to me, steal from me, or break my heart. Kids seem like a bad gamble that favors the house.
I dont really want to own a house or land, it just seems like a hassle in the end. I refuse to hold a job for more than a couple years at most for an unknown reason. I must have quit at least 25 jobs so far. I just get so sick of whatever im doing, because ultimately, I dont feel good about anything im doing, or anything I've done. I also move city to city, state to state either trying to run from the way I feel, or maybe still just hoping I will somehow find It.
Do you have this panicky feeling of desperation that you are missing something important? That something is fundamentally wrong with everything around you, or maybe its just wrong with you? Do you feel like you're suffocating, but cant explain why? Do you feel like a caged predator whose never seen, or even heard of the world outside, but you know in your heart that there's somewhere else you're supposed to be, something else you're supposed to be doing?
I dont know exactly what to tell you man. I hate everything about the life I live. I've looked for god, but its just the same self deluding garbage as that self-help crap to me. Completely forced and empty. All of this seems like such a waste of time, like every different thing I do is just some kind of meaningless distraction to keep me from finding what I need actually need to be able to heal myself.
Im not advocating for you to kill yourself. Im not saying im going to kill myself. Im not telling you there is no hope. What im telling you is that there are other people who feel like you do, you're not actually alone. We dont talk about it because we get sick of hearing the same worthless answers from people who dont get it anyway. Thats why what they suggest never works. Then they put us down, and make us feel even more lost and alone.
I also tried sobriety for three years, didnt help. Tried medications for a year, never helped. Keep trying man, I hope you find It. I just gave up about a month ago, now I feel like im just waiting to die. I think its been getting worse as I age. I feel betrayed for trying to put all the positivity I had into believing that if I try hard enough and long enough then I would find an answer, or I could find just one single reason.
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #3]
#23758480 - 10/21/16 04:22 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
Do you have this panicky feeling of desperation that you are missing something important? That something is fundamentally wrong with everything around you, or maybe its just wrong with you? Do you feel like you're suffocating, but cant explain why? Do you feel like a caged predator whose never seen, or even heard of the world outside, but you know in your heart that there's somewhere else you're supposed to be, something else you're supposed to be doing?
Lots of people feel like this. I do. It's called being in the modern world. In the system. Find a way out or at least find a role within it where you are doing something you are happy and fulfilled in. These lives are out there, you just gotta look for them.
Don't accept things for the way they are. That's exactly why society sucks so much. Make things better. For yourself. Fuck everyone and everything else. Find what you want in life. And I know you want to be free. Most people contemplating suicide want freedom. Recognize your feelings for what they are and that there are other ways out, and they're worth trying.
Stop going from city to city. Cities are the hub of corruption in humanity.
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Free time is the only time
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Anonymous #3
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23758799 - 10/21/16 06:29 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Seems like what you and your kind don't understand is that freedom you think you find is little more than slavery with a choice. The different trades I've tried so far include: farming, acoustical ceilings, residential roofing, residential concrete, student (went for 2 years of a BA in nursing), commercial concrete, CNA (maybe the only good I've done with my life), waiter, worked at home depot in lumber, paving company, commercial roofing. Alot of those jobs 2 or 3 different places.
I've worked for myself, I've worked for others. Working for yourself is even worse than working as a foreman for someone else. More slavery, more bullshit.
"Make things better"
Do you seriously think people who feel this way dont want that? It's the only thing we want. But its not real, and it never will be. As a cna in an elderly care facility I had the opportunity to take care of millionaires and the absolute dirt poor. They all die just as miserably, no matter what they have or dont have. Want to know a common theme from those people? I've heard this exact phrase from more than a few at their end. "I wish I would have done it differently," and since I cared about them as people I would ask them what they would do different. They never had an answer really, just the same one "I dont know, I just wish I had done it different."
Those people did have a couple things in common. They had families, they had jobs they retired from, sometimes multiple jobs. They did everything you and yours have done, and that you tell the rest of us to do. Why should I prove myself right to myself? I already know in my heart I figured it out. There is no meaning here, there's life I guess, but what's the point?
You just dont get it man. Know that you know what you know and do not know what you do not know.
I'm not putting you down. I'm not telling you are stupid, because I dont believe you are. My assumption is that you are a good man (or woman). But there is no substance to your words. There is only faith. I leave faith to the gullible. If you try, you will see its impossible for you to put forth any substance whatsoever. Just words based in different forms of faith.
We want something real, we want something tangible. But its not here, its not real. Any of us can just start believing life is good, but it doesn't change anything. Ever sit and wonder why so many of the elderly off themselves? Ever wonder if its because they've lived the life you are living right now, made it to the end game, then realized its all for nothing, its just a shitty joke without a punchline?
The only real hope I have in my life is that none of my brothers or my sister ever see things my way. I hope they obliviously go thru their lives only looking thru your eyes. I hope life is good to you, I hope you're always happy, and I hope you never feel the way I do. I hope I dont wake up tomorrow, im just so tired, I just want this to stop.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23758906 - 10/21/16 07:10 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
CookieCrumbs said:
Quote:
Anonymous said:
Do you have this panicky feeling of desperation that you are missing something important? That something is fundamentally wrong with everything around you, or maybe its just wrong with you? Do you feel like you're suffocating, but cant explain why? Do you feel like a caged predator whose never seen, or even heard of the world outside, but you know in your heart that there's somewhere else you're supposed to be, something else you're supposed to be doing?
Lots of people feel like this. I do. It's called being in the modern world. In the system. Find a way out or at least find a role within it where you are doing something you are happy and fulfilled in. These lives are out there, you just gotta look for them.
Don't accept things for the way they are. That's exactly why society sucks so much. Make things better. For yourself. Fuck everyone and everything else. Find what you want in life. And I know you want to be free. Most people contemplating suicide want freedom. Recognize your feelings for what they are and that there are other ways out, and they're worth trying.
Stop going from city to city. Cities are the hub of corruption in humanity.
"Lots of people feel like this."
You dont know how he feels...
"Fuck everyone and everything else."
Like your needy desire for him to live instead of make his own decision on what to do with his own life? A lot of people suffer more than it's worth to live, stop pretending that isnt true. If we lived in a society where euthanasia was legal and anyone could take a painless fatal shot nad it was a socially acceptable thing, all you gullible fools would probably be preaching a different narrative.
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Anonymous #3
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23758952 - 10/21/16 07:28 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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You talking about dignitas? Its not about some "poor me, no one understands me" wussy shit man. Its about wasting time. Wasting effort.
That, and those places just dont let you walk in off the street with a sob story and then dose you with phenobarbital. That would be nice thou, id walk in and sob for them, why not?
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Anonymous #1
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #3]
#23758995 - 10/21/16 07:45 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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No, I'm saying that if they did put anyone down who wanted to be put down and it was socially acceptable, you probably wouldn't even be saying that, you'd be going along with what's socially acceptable. It's going to happen anyway. Spare your sob story about not working hard and putting in the effort, lol. Fuck your expectations. Let nature run its course, there's enough people on this earth anyways, let people end their suffering as a means of population control. Fuck your sensitive morals.
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Anonymous #3
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23759015 - 10/21/16 07:54 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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My bad friend, im almost thru my second bomber of Woot stout, that shit messes up my perceptions.
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #3]
#23759296 - 10/21/16 09:32 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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What is with everyone making rediculous assumptions today?
If your life is hell by all means I think you have a right to end it. But you're life isn't hell. You're just stuck in a cycle of hell. Morals... My morals are it's my life. I won't get another one like it. And you won't either. If you want to throw everything away, who your are, and your place on this really awesome planet, that's your choice. My advice is simply to try to find another way out. Going through the motions in society and jumping from one cycle of hell in it to another doesn't count as true change. That's about as much change as Obama brought us. You have to go outside the comfort zone. Outside the norm. With a mentality like that.
Dunno why you chose to attack me with that anon1. I'm suggesting you do the opposite of what is commonly accepted in our society. There are things in life worth living for. It's up to you to look at them, to find them, and to cherish them.
Morals It has nothing to do with morals. It has everything to do with you not wasting your life. I do think some people actually should kill themselves. But there is SO few people who truly have no other option, no other point in living, no joy left... that I really doubt anyone in this thread is one of them.
When the time comes I will probably blow my brains out. But you can best bet I will have gotten everything out of life that I could. Everything. I will have learned, loved, cried, died a thousand times over in an emotional spiritual sense, and lived more, and loved more, and experienced more. I won't just go out with a bang, I'll have gone out fighting. I believe in the spirit of life. I assume many people do. And they feel it being smothered by the bullshit of our society. Go and try to find the spirit, to find freedom, to find the "point" in life... or give up. You die one way or another. If you don't try then everything that has brought you up to this moment really is just a sad meaningless waste of a life.
It has nothing to do with morals. It's about being a human being with remarkable potential and choosing to not try to live up to it because it's hard. I know it's hard. I've had suicidal thoughts almost daily for the last 15 years. And some would say I am wasting my life posting on the shroomery. But I don't feel like I am. I feel like all of this has a purpose. We are all connected. If I can help just one person to understand, to try to make changes in life, then they may realize their potential, and go on to help others, and so on. That alone makes being alive today, through the pain and the doubts and the sorrow, very much worth it.
Some people do not sink as far as others. But that doesn't matter. Most people do sink. Alot of people go to horribly dark places. But the people that come out of the dark are the ones who can most appreciate the light. The best people I have ever met have been through complete hell. And I'm glad they made the choice to push on. I hope the rest of you will decide the same.
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Free time is the only time
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RJ Tubs 202


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,016
Loc: USA
Last seen: 12 hours, 39 minutes
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: bigdoodie]
#23762859 - 10/23/16 12:02 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
bigdoodie said: I mean ive never seen a squirrel hanging from a noose, I wonder what their secret is.
They don't take themselves seriously.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
#23763049 - 10/23/16 01:53 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Not so easy when the world takes you seriously for your physical and mental disadvantages. Squirrels don't have the social pressure humans do. I haven't even told one person on this website what I have to live with because it's that bad. Why do you act like you know? You make those who truly suffer look smaller than you, and it makes you look like a fool.
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Anonymous #4
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23763052 - 10/23/16 01:54 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Will you tell us anonymously?
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Anonymous #4
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip]
#23763067 - 10/23/16 02:12 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Trippedytrip said: Hello there ,
After my 2nd shroom trip 3,5 something went really wrong.
My brain got stuck in the momemt due to a panic situation.
My brain got stuck and since that trip i havnt been normal again.
There is no point of living like this anymore cause i cant function normal in day to day life , i completely isolated and my brain doesnt reset to normal again .
What can i do ? I am very hopeless
Feel glad that you were normal for a while at least. I don't even remember when I snapped. Don't get into hard drugs, trust me. They're not what they're cracked up to be, even if you only look at the good.
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They
Stranger

Registered: 10/23/16
Posts: 146
Last seen: 7 years, 2 months
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
#23763132 - 10/23/16 03:10 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
RJ Tubs 202 said:
Quote:
bigdoodie said: I mean ive never seen a squirrel hanging from a noose, I wonder what their secret is.
They don't take themselves seriously.
Indeed. Technically speaking they also don't have a Default Mode Network that's as active as a human's, and thus there's no way for them to worry about things that are not here, just potentially out there in the future.
If squirrels did what humans do, namely sit somewhere isolated and brood over the fact that they could be eaten any single day, that look what happened to 3 of those brothers and 4 of those sisters and cousins, they'd just stare into blank space unable or unwilling to climb a single branch.
But the DMN isn't there in their heads, or not that active or advanced, to talk to them about these horrible fear-based hypothetical scenarios, and so if the coast is clear RIGHT NOW, then it's good to go, fun day to eat nuts and play with fellow squirrels
To anyone interested in learning more of this, link here. Understanding the DMN / TPN activity in our heads is I think key for trippers and anyone looking to stay mentally healthy, in good mood 
@OP - I know exactly what's going on there, what the problem is, and to a large extent how it's fixed. Only issue is I'm a fresh poster here so you'd have very little reasons to trust what I say.
So simply see if what I say makes sense to you, if it connects.
You mention the shroom trip being fine, going well, then two friends came screaming, and from then on it started going to shit.
I've had this. I've had this sort of mid-trip disruptions and reactions so extreme from my end, to the point where I was actively plotting to put people away, even for weeks and months after the trip. Details unimportant, nobody got physically hurt or assaulted, but that mid-trip event triggered initially almost a breakdown, and then as I was grasping and struggling to cope with the anger, irritation, frustration, it pushed me to learn a ton about the body, health, mental health and it got me WAY stronger than I was before.
I'm very much convinced that this is happening to you as well. Note that you are now considering Ayahuasca for instance, as a means to cure this condition, which if all was hunky-dory you wouldn't go for, or certainly not with this level of immediacy.
I advise against suicide for the simple practical reason that it will in fact NOT solve your problem. Your mileage may vary here, but from what the Aya showed me, if you do that, you are quite likely to repeat the exact same pattern in another set and setting. Come back next life, some trip someone triggers you in the exact same way, then what? Kill yourself again as you can't handle it? Ok, then what? Come again, trigger again, kill self again? How many times?
We repeat the same level of the game UNTIL WE LEARN THE LESSON.
Your lesson is here, now.
What you have in your nervous system is an amount of stress and disturbance that you were not used to before, it was put there to push you, to force you to up your game in terms of expressing true emotions, letting go, expressing aggression anger and frustration, or else if you try to suppress, to be polite, to hold it in, that suppression will suck the life right out of you, everything will seem bleak and pointless. And yes it WILL kill you, slowly, probably via cancer, related to low body voltage.
Very likely clearing this problem will involve you looking at what you eat, drink, inhale, how you breathe and express, and also your relationships with your parents. I'm going to go on a hunch here and say that at least one of your parents, if not both, were likely inhibiting the hell out of your behavior, very non-accepting of you expressing anger. I suspect your mom, but yeah, as I said, merely hunches. Whoever it was, you have learned to suppress instead of fully express.
When was the last time you pushed, slapped or punched someone? Without alcohol involved I mean. When did you last start or escalate a direct confrontation, on a clear head, just because you instinctively knew it was the right reaction to do? Do you express these normal healthy primal instincts, or continuously suppress them?
Realize that this thing that happened mid-trip, is a trigger and a way for you to learn and master this stuff, so that you don't have to get cancer and such later, due to years and decades of self-repression.
You may have noticed that dogs act kinda weird around you, especially after the event. Do tell if you have dogs or have had interactions with them in this period, how they played out. Dogs and animals in general sense when you're self-repressing in this way, and they instinctively know to trigger you, to bark and growl, to force you to let go, to somehow get back into the now, fucking BREATHE and play the game with the rest of reality, don't stay stuck in the past, or that stuck-ness will end you.
Hope this makes sense and gets your head sparkling with the right ideas. My PM is open, also talking here would be good, as others may have similar issues and would benefit from seeing you overcome yours.
How do you feel about those two noisy guys? Go back to the memory of the trip and EXPRESS what happened, express your emotions. Draw or sketch or doodle if you can, this WILL help you make sense of the emotions involved. KNow that this is not just about those two guys, this merely triggered deeper repressed emotions you had from before, that needed attention and clearing now. This is the integration work that some trips need, it DOES go this deep.
It's fixable, what you have now is not only fixable, it will in fact make you stronger healthier happier than you were before. I know this as I've seen this directly, I know it for a fact. Thanks for reading
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Trippedytrip
TrippedyTrip



Registered: 09/07/15
Posts: 514
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: They]
#23763304 - 10/23/16 06:19 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Thanks for the replies!
I kinda left badly that trip and it stayed since then.
Now , i dont get high from weed , dont feel anything . Mdma helps for a moment but also not.
I tried a Shrooms dose last week from 1g . It brang some clarity but it didnt unmake the clay and didnt let me see the light and experience universal love.
So i dont know if dosing up is the way because things can get worse but when i reach the point where i have nothing left i will do it because i am living in this hell since 7-8 months and cant take it anymore.
I was in the Ward 9 Weeks . Didnt help
I am sober since 2-3 Months until last week.
Things that i feel:
-Feel no connection o my body to the earth,ground -Feel Stuck inside my head -Feeling as if i am not really in my body
Last week i went to my homepath. She said to me that i wasnt really inside my body because i arent and i feel that. She said my chakras are not aligned and she felt as if i was still in that trip. That 1 ,30 session cost me 170 euro. I got prescribed globuli from peyote. She said she could fix my state but i should not use drugs to try it that it will make it worse. She has had similar cases to mine and worse and knows about drugs.
I am 19 , pretty much fucked , cant function really "normal" in society as i used to. The connection is missing .
I havmt lost my mind or anything else , i have learned so much in since that happened because i see everything from a higher point of view but i would like to come down to normal again.
What i think happened on that trip is that i had a Panic reaction , i did fight the trip at start and thats why things got bumpy. Now i wish i hadnt even tried them at first.
I am a very open minded person but i am also afraid if i keep dosing up the shrooms to heal myself is that i completely fuck up with me and loose everything.
On the other hand i want to go back to normal feel everything again , i tried it with 1g , everything felt much more realer but this point is missing. It is not the case that i cant control myself while tripping but i dont want to loose everything.
I will follow my gut feeling
What can i do bro?
Thanks guys
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Anonymous #4
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip] 1
#23763307 - 10/23/16 06:22 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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My advice: lose the homeopathy. That is nonsense. 170 euro?
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Trippedytrip
TrippedyTrip



Registered: 09/07/15
Posts: 514
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #4]
#23763332 - 10/23/16 06:44 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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I am now posting what happened on that trip and how things are atm.
So imma do that:
4th Shroom Trip Report :
Set Setting : 19-20:00 , Friends House ( Experienced Tripper) at our Apartments where co-workers live from the same enterprise.
Me and my friend has planned to do Shrooms that day , i was waiting for him and he then came after work.
My Shrooms were dried , ready to ingest. We chose his Apartment because he had a balcony and air flow was better and we could do more noise in there. We didnt have a scale atm , so he suggested we both eat a hand full of Hawaiaan Cubensis . He ate a little bit more. It all was chill , good relaxing music on , talking about the day and expecting the trip. After some time , we decided to go to the Gas station to get some beer. It was like 5 Min Away so we decided to go , each grab us 2 beers 0,5 and get back. When we where heading back home it was kicking in by my friend , i didnt feel anything. After some time , we were back , he was tripping hard , and i was enjoying the music. Then , it happened , someone rang outside and we heard those 1 female friend of mine(experienced tripper) drunk with another of her friend we new from school.
We let them come up , then we told the we had ingested shrooms. The other friend of her was like screaming and then they started to put on some techno wich i like. I offered them to give them some shrooms and they both ate the rest of it.
It was kicking hard by now inside of me and i felt a huge body load , the situation was like really overwhelming because everything happened to fast and it was way to much for my mind.
Then her friend kept talking bullshit about festivals and she was like repeating herself 20 times over and over because she was a dumb drunk pieace of shit . I was getting really mad at that moment and getting really angry at her. I told my friend to say her to fuck off or something and there was when i started having a panic reaction , i couldnt speak a word , then i saw into the mirror got also weird.
It was really abrupt , it was a second where something happened inside of me where i knew something when wrong.
We decided to change setting , got a taxi and when to her house because it was bigger and chillier.
We arrived at her home. We didnt had music , we smoked cigs and chilled out on the couch and i was talking with my friend and i started to feel better and enjoy some visuals i had .
I finally was coming down and went to bed with my friend .The night was way to overwhelming for me.
Next morning , i didnt really thought about how i feeled and didnt really digest that trip. I did the error of going to School at 8 am . It was the first day of school and i should have stayed at home better.
I kept going with life , kept with weed , always weed sessions wich were really more similar to shrooms.
I didnt really think much about it at the time i just kept on going.
I have been working since the trip ( September 2015) till June ( 2016) but got much in trouble in the work ,had no force , was getting way to paranoid bcs of smoking , i didnt know what was going on , something was wrong . I was looking for answers . I had a mental breakdown then from overthinking. I went to my moms house 1 Month , nothing got much better. Then i stayed at the Ward for 9 weeks. A wrong decision , didnt help .
Now atm , i feel like this
I kinda left badly that trip and it stayed since then.
Now , i dont get high from weed , dont feel anything . Mdma helps for a moment but also not.
I tried a Shrooms dose last week from 1g . It brang some clarity but it didnt unmake the clay and didnt let me see the light and experience universal love.
So i dont know if dosing up is the way because things can get worse but when i reach the point where i have nothing left i will do it because i am living in this hell since 7-8 months and cant take it anymore
I am sober since 2-3 Months until last week.
Things that i feel:
-Feel no connection o my body to the earth,ground -Feel Stuck inside my head -Feeling as if i am not really in my body
Last week i went to my homepath. She said to me that i wasnt really inside my body because i arent and i feel that. She said my chakras are not aligned and she felt as if i was still in that trip. That 1 ,30 session cost me 170 euro. I got prescribed globuli from peyote. She said she could fix my state but i should not use drugs to try it that it will make it worse. She has had similar cases to mine and worse and knows about drugs.
I am 19 , pretty much fucked , cant function really "normal" in society as i used to. The connection is missing .
I havmt lost my mind or anything else , i have learned so much in since that happened because i see everything from a higher point of view but i would like to come down to normal again.
What i think happened on that trip is that i had a Panic reaction , i did fight the trip at start and thats why things got bumpy. Now i wish i hadnt even tried them at first.
I am a very open minded person but i am also afraid if i keep dosing up the shrooms to heal myself is that i completely fuck up with me and loose everything.
On the other hand i want to go back to normal feel everything again , i tried it with 1g , everything felt much more realer but this point is missing. It is not the case that i cant control myself while tripping but i dont want to loose everything.
I will follow my gut feeling
What can i do bro?
Thanks guys
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Trippedytrip]
#23763702 - 10/23/16 09:57 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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You're 19, you're not fucked. You're definitely not "grounded" listen to your homeopathy lady... But I dunno if I'd keep seeing her. 170 seems hella steep.
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Free time is the only time
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They
Stranger


Registered: 10/23/16
Posts: 146
Last seen: 7 years, 2 months
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #4]
#23764107 - 10/23/16 12:07 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said: My advice: lose the homeopathy. That is nonsense. 170 euro? 
Give this man a raise
Overpriced dude, Jesus H. Christ that's overpriced. Screw that lady and her hogwash BS, I work with cases like yours and take payment donation-based AFTER the job is done, or in any case gradually, ONLY if and as the client feels any real change and progress. For 170 eur I'd have worked with you for a couple of weeks.
Holy smokes, 170 eur? Jesus man, maybe I should move there, if there's that level of need for these kind of services that they warrant these astronomical prices.
My God, they'd have to offer at least two, if not three young ladies offering happy ending for the session, for me to show up to an 170 euro healing gig
Please note that you've now started two threads about this and are making it hard to keep up with the story. Kindly make up your mind as to where you wish to play
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23764463 - 10/23/16 02:53 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said: Not so easy when the world takes you seriously for your physical and mental disadvantages. Squirrels don't have the social pressure humans do. I haven't even told one person on this website what I have to live with because it's that bad. Why do you act like you know? You make those who truly suffer look smaller than you, and it makes you look like a fool.
Anon1 you are projecting. You are assuming alot while accusing others of assuming alot.
I don't know what you go through, you don't know what I go through, we don't know what he goes through. Our society teaches us to hide and internalize pain. That's why so many people commit suicide and family and friends say they never knew. It's quite sad.
So with that in mind how do you know who 'truly suffers' and who does not? The fact you won't even speak of your problems with a double layer of anonymity makes me think you've internalized everything so much that you're paranoid about people looking down on you and judging you and not understanding you. And manifesting more and more reasons to feel that way. We are all unique, but almost all of us feel that way in one way or another. You are isolating yourself when you could instead be trying to relate.
I speak as someone who pushes everyone away and has had more than a few legitimate off key problems. Saying you're alone and that the world pushes you down instead of seeking common ground just makes you down and alone. You here are telling others not to judge you without knowing you while doing just that to them.
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Free time is the only time
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Sporepoise
fungal cetacean


Registered: 02/21/16
Posts: 264
Last seen: 8 months, 9 days
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23764472 - 10/23/16 02:59 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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you should try running a mile everyday and maybe take up a new hobby or read a new book. These things aren't exactly a miracle cure but just keeping your body active and focusing on something positive can make a difference. Also maybe lay off the hallucinogens for a year.
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sprinkles
otd president


Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 21,527
Loc: washington state
Last seen: 3 years, 17 days
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Thayendanegea]
#23764495 - 10/23/16 03:06 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Thayendanegea said: Holy fuck Sprinkles...that is pretty scary stuff. Can't say I've ever had any thoughts like that...How was your mind set before you took the mushrooms?...Were they cyans?
come to think of it they might have been cyans.
My state of mind was fine, I think its tripping inside that is a huge mistake. If I were to ever do it again (which i doubt I will) it will be outside.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23764529 - 10/23/16 03:20 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Funny how you accuse me of projecting and then go on to project yourself. I wasn't unintentionally projecting, I'm not that stupid. He was being simple so that's what he got. If you're going to say something, say what you mean and mean what you say. Can't come off as a wise ass with a one liner and expect everyone to know what you mean.
My disadvantage is genetic and physical. Positively altering my perspective of myself does help but it doesn't cure the suffering.
Edited by Anonymous (10/23/16 03:32 PM)
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23764654 - 10/23/16 04:11 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Of course not. There are some people (alot more than we admit I think) that ride an undercurrent of suffering.
I assumed by the way you'd talked you had something permanent going on.
And I suppose your point is very fair. But I was speaking very generally, including your previous posts in my reply. Or I could be confusing you with another Anon. I'm fucking tired.
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Free time is the only time
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Rollin.n.Strollin



Registered: 07/25/16
Posts: 814
Loc: Australia
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23765929 - 10/24/16 04:13 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Buddy I've seen you put up a few posts that just contradict your purpose of using psychedelic substances, honestly after putting up with multiple relatives that attempted suicide in one night, and including the traumatic stresses of life that crush me, and my own problems have also pushed me into that dark corner of life, it really does hit the feeling a when I see people at this stage.
But even when you're in the most hellish situation that your mind could not possibly imagine, there is an end to it all. I honestly urge you to stop using any substances at all, and seek some professional help, where ever you can get help it will make you feel better, theres many people on the shroomery here that I am sure would be experienced within this kind of thing, including myself, your welcome to me, I'm no professional but I've been stuck in the shit as well.
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SleepyE
DMT is metaphysical



Registered: 07/21/08
Posts: 8,759
Loc: Ontario, Canada,
Last seen: 3 hours, 7 minutes
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Re: I am taking Suicide as an option guys [Re: sprinkles]
#23765947 - 10/24/16 04:42 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
sprinkles said:
Quote:
Thayendanegea said: Holy fuck Sprinkles...that is pretty scary stuff. Can't say I've ever had any thoughts like that...How was your mind set before you took the mushrooms?...Were they cyans?
come to think of it they might have been cyans.
My state of mind was fine, I think its tripping inside that is a huge mistake. If I were to ever do it again (which i doubt I will) it will be outside.
Most of the dangers you are claiming have to do with unsupervised use which can be dangerous for some people who cannot control their thoughts/actions.
in a clinical setting accompanied by security on call to handle any negative situation this would never have been a serious issue.
-------------------- My Drawingzz Draw DMT!
   Trip Report: SHROOMS DMT---- My Youtube Psychedelic Channel
Edited by SleepyE (10/24/16 04:43 AM)
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