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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Registered: 05/28/04
Posts: 27,202
Loc: Iceland
The Next Chapter- Life without Children
    #23745829 - 10/17/16 02:41 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

As my 30th birthday approaches I reflect on the last chapter of my life (my twenties) and contemplate the coming decade of my thirties.

I am deeply grateful that during my 20s I have been blessed beyond anything I could ever hope for or deserve and been able to establish for myself everything a man could want or need from life.

From losing everything at the age of 18 when my father gambled away everything my family had, I have been able to construct an abundant life one step at a time.

I have finished my education, acquired and fully paid off a house and car, married the love of my life, paid off all my debts , quit my harmful addictions, developed a healthy and athletic body, mastered the art of writing, travelled the world and locked down my dream job.

I have even completed my extensive doomsday preparations and survival stockpile.

I have developed my daily workout and meditation discipline to the point that daily practice is a pleasure not a burden.

I have completed two theses and published. 

The career I have now I will remain in until retirement, as it is literally the job of my dreams, with a pension and benefits.

I have even travelled the world enough to feel satisfied that I have seen much of this beautiful planet.

Having constructed this strong foundation, I can honestly say I feel that as I reach the age of 30 my life feels complete.

Everything I deeply want and need I have.

I have experienced everything I truly need to and I have had an unbelievably good life.

At this point most couples would be considering having children.

However my wife and I have decided never to have kids.

We have a cat and he Is as much of a child as we want.

As a result of the decision not to reproduce we have freed up our time, money and energy over the next 18 years.

Rather than dedicate the next two decades to raising children, we are now free to pursue whatever other passions and Pursuits we feel will bring us fulfilment.

My wife has decided to finish her pilots licence and recently flew a plane herself for the first time.

Pilot training is very expensive, but not nearly as expensive as raising a child.

For my own path I decided to join an MMA gym and take regular kickboxing, Jujitsu and wrestling classes.

For the next ten years I will dedicate the Lion's share of my energy and disposable income to mixed martial arts training.

I am also beginning daily supplementation with SAME, which is a very expensive supplement with profound benefits for emotional and physical health.

I will also work on finishing a fantasy novel and daily meditation aiming at 2 hours a day.

At this point I feel I could not ask for more from life and every day from now on is a precious gift.

No matter what happens I know I have been blessed to live such an abundant life and enjoy such a richness of love.

If God is willing and good fortune allows, I will yet obtain a black belt in martial arts, while my wife will complete her pilots training.

As we age we will also take turns getting our PHDs and continue traveling the world, beginning with Jamaica later this year.

We will retire early and develop our home into a completely off the grid self sufficient survival fortress.

This is the lifestyle made possible by one simple decision- the decision not to reproduce.

Dual income , no kids.

We are now tasting the benefits this choice has made possible - abundant free time, abundant spare energy and Abundant disposable income.

As most young couples (including friends of ours ) begin the process of becoming pregnant and raising children, we set out on the next chapter of our own lives .

Assuming we would otherwise have had two children, we have approximately a half million dollars of completely disposable Income  (250 000 per child).

We also have freed up approximately two decades of our time and energy.

My goals now are simply to enjoy life as much as possible and minimize my stress while pursuing mastery of Martial arts and inner peace.

I believe that enlightenment is a real, achievable state and that if I dedicate the time and energy most people dedicate to raising children it is only a matter of time until I attain it.

The hard work is all out of the way . We both finished our masters degrees, we bought and paid off our home and car, we paid off all our debts , and we have build a rock solid marriage over the last ten years of love and dedication to one another.

All that remains now is to attain the state of consciousness represented by the Buddha, Krishna and Christ, which I consider to be the highest possible human attainment.

I make this post for a few reasons.

First, to reflect on my life so far and contemplate my future , and intentionally create the best possible lifestyle over the next ten years.

Second, to offer to readers a path and a perspective different from the mainstream linear life most of us are told is the only way, and encourage people to consider the kind of life that is made possible simply by choosing to sacrifice the experience of reproducing and rearing children.

Third, to inquire of others- what does the next chapter of your life look like ?

What things have you not yet attained that you look forward to, and what will you do with your next ten years, if God and Chance permits you to abide that long upon this marvelous, imperiled earth ?


Salutations to you, mendicants.

May you all be blessed with long lives rich in love and free of fear and pain.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


Edited by Moonshoe (10/17/16 02:56 PM)


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Offlinepslyke
fantasmagoric
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Registered: 06/12/10
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Re: The Next Chapter- Life without Children [Re: Moonshoe]
    #23747021 - 10/17/16 07:52 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

My wife and I made the same decision for many of the same reasons. So far we mostly don't regret the decision. We are a bit older than you and your wife and we are both well educated and work in demanding professions. That said, we do have more spare time than most of our friends and colleagues that have children.

It's important to use that spare time wisely and I don't always feel that we do. One of the things that I have grown to value a great deal is the time I spend with other peoples children. I find this peculiar given that I didn't really have a burning passion  to have my own.

One random observation about being married and not having children that seems apparent to me is the fact that my wife and I enjoy a considerably above average relationship. Not sure why, but I think the reduced stress of not always fighting about kid stuff and the added time that we have to spend with each other are probably important contributors.

I also think there is an important distinction to be made between those couples that wanted children and were unable and those that decided that having children didn't fit into their life plans. Those that wanted to have children and were unable often seem discontent in their marriages (personal observation).


--------------------
"What appears impenetrable to us does exist, manifesting itself in the deepest wisdom and the most radiant beauty" Einstein

"The conservatives of 70 years ago would be outraged at what has come to pass. It embodies everything they took up arms for to defeat"Asante


:kratom:


Edited by pslyke (10/17/16 07:53 PM)


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Invisiblefalsereality


Registered: 04/01/13
Posts: 4,112
Re: The Next Chapter- Life without Children [Re: Moonshoe]
    #23747037 - 10/17/16 07:57 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Moonshoe said:
quit my harmful addictions




Somehow I don't believe that.

Congrats on not having kids though, that's a smart move.


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OfflineLucisM
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 29 days
Re: The Next Chapter- Life without Children [Re: Moonshoe]
    #23747049 - 10/17/16 08:02 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

You must have had a good family growing up to have achieved so much.

Good job for you guys.:hug:


--------------------
©️


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InvisibleMoonshoe
Blue Mantis
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Registered: 05/28/04
Posts: 27,202
Loc: Iceland
Re: The Next Chapter- Life without Children [Re: pslyke]
    #23748143 - 10/18/16 07:56 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Thanks for sharing. It makes sense to me that compared to parents , childless couples can  more easily maintain a healthy relationship because they are free to focus their time and energy on one another and cultivating romance and dates and staying in shape and all the things that are good for a marriage.

Not to mention childless couples have much less financial stress and less general stress and that is good for the relationship as well.

@false reality - I don't consider kratom, coffee and weed harmful addictions.

I wasn't addicted to alcohol but it is harmful so my wife and I are giving booze up now as well, and I have dropped my kratom dosing to 50% of days instead of every day.

Now that winter is here I'm also going to switch to vaporizing weed instead of smoking which will make it even less harmful .

They say each kid costs about a quarter million dollars. So by not having a family of four like my parents did we will have about a million dollars to play with.

My plan with that money is to retire much earlier , invest in getting out house off the grid and/or buy a cabin to retire at.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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