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yogashaman21
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Registered: 08/04/14
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wanting to journey but too scared
#23722035 - 10/09/16 12:30 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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hi,
I want to go on a deep journey with mushrooms but am too scared to, so I never do, and have been contemplating it for over 6 months now.
I really am seeking authentic ego-death experience but don't know if I can reach it, I feel completely enslaved by the evil forces and do not know how to proceed
I am looking to try 30 grams fresh of a potent truffle variety. From what I've read these contain much less water than fresh mushrooms, so this might be the perfect dose for a cosmic experience hopefully. But hopefully not a horrible experience. I just want a higher level of enlightenment experience, one that stays with me for good.
Any insights would be appreciated, thanks.
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TheGoat


Registered: 12/08/15
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: yogashaman21]
#23722057 - 10/09/16 12:37 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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I too have been looking for an experience like this. I think the best way to go about is to just go all in, do all the preparations you would for a Normal dose but take more than usual. It should be a good experience unless set and setting is bad.
-------------------- Hi I'm high. Anything posted by me related to cultivation or illegal activities is purely fictional. It is intended for educational or entertainment purposes only.
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yogashaman21
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: TheGoat]
#23722075 - 10/09/16 12:42 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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thanks for the advice man, yes my setting is not that great; I feel completely enslaved by darkness right here, wheres I live. I think I need to change where I live and then things may go a little bit better. But still scared of a strong entheogenic trip.
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Morel Guy
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: TheGoat]
#23722083 - 10/09/16 12:43 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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The plant teacher is more about losing desire. Bringing expectation is a bad thing. My best trips came with just going with the flow. I don't think ego loss as it relates to experiencing ecstasy is from dosage. People can meditate and go into that with absolutely nothing.
-------------------- "in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur" In filth it will be found in dung it will be found
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yogashaman21
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: Morel Guy]
#23722096 - 10/09/16 12:46 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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thanks for the replies. But I feel like I don't possess the brain capacity anymore for that sort of thing to happen from simply meditation. I need some type of spiritual boost to be able to reach enlightenment. meditation just doesn't work for me and have tried it a lot.
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thebug76
2 years in.



Registered: 05/31/15
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Loc: North of the equater and ...
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: Morel Guy]
#23722113 - 10/09/16 12:49 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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You'll love it. Just remember, it's only a trip cause shit can get scary real quick if you forget that part.
-------------------- Bug
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Morel Guy
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: yogashaman21]
#23722145 - 10/09/16 01:00 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Forget all about enlightenment. It doesn't occur from trying as is my current understanding.
-------------------- "in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur" In filth it will be found in dung it will be found
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JacksonMetaller
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: Morel Guy]
#23722248 - 10/09/16 01:26 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Morel Guy said: Forget all about enlightenment. It doesn't occur from trying as is my current understanding.
That's right. It comes from getting your butt kicked. Humility is the ticket. Don't fight it, don't direct it, don't label it. Let the trip express itself and just listen. If you're going really deep there is no other option. The trip will give you what you need. Should you remember that you are the creator of the present moment you can fly as high as you want. If a trip is terrifying take comfort in the fact that it will bottom out before turning around and where that point is is entirely dependent on how much suffering you can tolerate before owning up to your own shit That said i'm not familiar with truffles, so i don't know what kind of depth we're really talking here. Most trips won't do that to you, but if you're truly talking ego death you are literally talking about experiencing "a little death". Basically the same idea as the guy laying on his death bed either reflecting on how insane his life was and wishing for a redo, or being satisfied and transcending the body back into the infinite cosmos. It's not always pleasant and you should never reach for that on that basis. If you just want some philosophical jerk off material smoke a bowl of DMT. If you're looking for deep commitment to facing your fears and bettering yourself proceed, and do so safely. Happy travels brother. Hope you find what you're looking for
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Ziu
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: Morel Guy]
#23722319 - 10/09/16 01:46 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Maybe you should listen your fear. It is not always about conquering it. Sometimes it is the answer, even if your mind doesn't agree.
Sounds like you are in hurry to get rid of something or to gain something and you are holding yourself back for reason.
I got few years when I felt anxious and fear about tripping, because it wasn't right time. It is not some highway to nirvana, although it can be great teacher in your path.
Is there really something to gain or get rid of? Is everything so black and white, darkness and light.
You might feel that you are in total darkness, but notice the air you breathe, how light is it.
Patience.
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yogashaman21
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: Ziu]
#23722457 - 10/09/16 02:31 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
If you just want some philosophical jerk off material smoke a bowl of DMT
what exactly do you mean by this? Are you implying that vaporized DMT on it's own is useless?
Quote:
Maybe you should listen your fear. It is not always about conquering it. Sometimes it is the answer, even if your mind doesn't agree.
Sounds like you are in hurry to get rid of something or to gain something and you are holding yourself back for reason.
I got few years when I felt anxious and fear about tripping, because it wasn't right time. It is not some highway to nirvana, although it can be great teacher in your path.
Is there really something to gain or get rid of? Is everything so black and white, darkness and light.
You might feel that you are in total darkness, but notice the air you breathe, how light is it.
Patience. 
Yes in fact I have been in a hurry to try and get rid of my fear or my ego and be free for good but I am utterly enslaved by darkness and it is horrible, like a metaphysical cage, and i'm being mocked by evil people and spirits the whole time, whether sober or not. I try meditation but really not going anywhere with it. I want to be free of my ego for good and be permanently at a higher state of enlightenment but do not see how this is possible. I just don't know if mushrooms or any analogue of said substance could ever provide me with the cosmic experience and freedom from darkness and fear and everything negative and terrible for good, permanently. I don't want to feel shame or fear or anger or anything, or be mocked by anyone or anything constantly, everyday for the rest of my life.
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thebug76
2 years in.



Registered: 05/31/15
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: yogashaman21]
#23722539 - 10/09/16 03:00 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Yes in fact I have been in a hurry to try and get rid of my fear or my ego and be free for good but I am utterly enslaved by darkness and it is horrible, like a metaphysical cage, and i'm being mocked by evil people and spirits the whole time, whether sober or not. I try meditation but really not going anywhere with it. I want to be free of my ego for good and be permanently at a higher state of enlightenment but do not see how this is possible. I just don't know if mushrooms or any analogue of said substance could ever provide me with the cosmic experience and freedom from darkness and fear and everything negative and terrible for good, permanently. I don't want to feel shame or fear or anger or anything, or be mocked by anyone or anything constantly, everyday for the rest of my life.
The thing about this is, the further away from ego you get the more people tend to make fun. I believe the reason for this is because huge egos are what drives retards to make fun of people.
Once you get closer to enlightenment and further from ego, you tend to be more vulnarable to those antics
-------------------- Bug
Edited by thebug76 (10/09/16 03:02 PM)
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JacksonMetaller
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: yogashaman21]
#23722562 - 10/09/16 03:06 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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No sorry lol. Little loopy from this kratom. What I mean is, when people fantasize about ego death who haven't done it before... That's DMT. Something that blows your mind, merges you with life source, and produces some crazy visuals. It is absolutely a beautiful thing and I apologize for my crude description. But it doesn't in my experience get anywhere near as personal and involved as a typical psychedelic at the same intensity. Even say, oral DMT. It's a bit like fasting or going to a sweatlodge. You don't do it because it's pleasant. You do it because you need it. Smoked DMT can be dark, but is quite benign in comparison
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Morel Guy
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: yogashaman21]
#23722579 - 10/09/16 03:10 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Get used to and comfortable with your skin. Those sly remarks by people are never going to go away. How you react takes a lot of time to develop. You could go crazy if you become more vulnerable to what people perceive of you. Enlightenment is not an ego game. It's getting beyond that. I'm not so certain anybody has ever gone beyond. I've heard stories and some are more recent in history. They never get mad or angry. They would probably project a lot of authority if they did. It takes life times to build up a tolerance to the evil we do to ourselves. The human animal psyche is fucking massive and corrupt. Getting beyond that and seeing it in a harmless fashion, who wouldn't desire that? Drugs will at best temporarily add some perspective, at best good or bad.
-------------------- "in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur" In filth it will be found in dung it will be found
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JacksonMetaller
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Re: wanting to journey but too scared [Re: Morel Guy]
#23722613 - 10/09/16 03:20 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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OP just caught up with the rest of your post... Those things aren't going to go away brother. Ego death can certainly alter your perspective on it, but you're not going to be permanently blissed out. It's going to require daily struggle. I deal with a lot of the same things and moving towards permaculture is really my saving grace. We are human, we can't not be hurt by others. Sometimes it takes surrounding yourself by people who are on the same page to feel sane again
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Morel Guy
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^^^I agree but we can very easily be hurt by others. It never really goes away either. Either physical or mental harm and we remember or carry the wounds. That's IF we survive the encounter. What's done is done, nothing can really change that. Sure we could load on the bullshit about it making us stronger. But in your weakest it will hurt even more, cutting deeper.
People get into a lot of trouble sometimes when they take to much of a trip. People that eat the vial have worked their way up to that.
-------------------- "in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur" In filth it will be found in dung it will be found
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