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Anonymous #1
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oh my 1
#23705136 - 10/03/16 09:45 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Me and this girl have been in an on and off relationship since March. This incident took place on August 14th at around 1:45 AM. I remember the date and time because that's how emotionally and mentally scarred I am from this experience.
Long story short (I'll try) We were hooking up in the back of my car for the first time and I went down on her for a couple of minutes. I was really enjoying it, but for some reason, I wanted to lick her ass too. I know, I'm a nasty motherf*cker (I was drunk too so yea..)
Anyways I kept doing that for a little, then ate her vag, then I kissed her, which I now believe was really disgusting since I never informed her that I'd be eating her ass at that time. Umm this is really embarrassing as I'm typing this, but I will continue, because I know you guys want to hear the end of this. (It doesn't end well...trust me)
I know she wanted me to just do it already since I was hard and she was receptive, but something was keeping me from actually doing it. I asked her what she thought about condoms but she didn't answer, so I assumed it wasn't an issue.
I told her to turn around and she did, then as her ass was right there I proceeded to eat her ass again and finger her at the same time. This went on for about 20 seconds before she stopped me and pulled away and sat there in utter disgust and disbelief. Then she said "We...should...just....be.......friends" in the most sad pitiful low-pitched voice I'll ever hear in my life.
Now when I tell you that this girl was creeped out, I mean she was creeped outtt. She was trembling like a leaf and I felt soo terrible that I made a person I cared for feel like that. It was soo sad that I actually cried like a little bitch and tried to apologize, no joke. It hurts to tell this story, because as much as you think I'm fucking around....I'm not. She even said that she was wanted to walk home.
I eventually calmed down and dropped her off at her house. We hung out two days later and she was still visibly affected by what had happened, she didn't want to get close to me and said "I just want to give you a quick hug when I see you and another one when I leave".
I got super pissed and enraged (because of my damaged ego and sense of self) and started calling her a slut and saying she was being stupid and saying fuck you over and over. Basically, I lost my mind. She left her shit in my car so I called her over and threw it on the street, got back in, and slammed the door in her face and drove off. I know there's no excuse for that kind of behavior, but I felt like less than a man to a degree that alarmed me, nothing more, so I reacted. There's no re-do's in life, sadly.
I don't know why I couldn't just have sex with her without doing all that extra nasty stuff, I guess she was only a very good friend to me, so the thought of fucking her never seriously crossed my mind. I mean I seduced her and everything but still there was an absence of the need to get a nut off on her. I could feel she was only doing it to please me, not because she really wanted to and that turned me off a bit I guess.
But what I do know is that I'm fucked up in the mind for how this all went down and I feel soo ashamed of myself. I think I might have an anal fixation or something, and no I'm not homosexual or anything. I can't believe this, I mean, wow..
The worst thing is that I have to see her around campus everyday, this is soo bad
Edited by Anonymous (11/28/16 11:43 PM)
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23705460 - 10/03/16 11:30 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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It's only bad so long as your ego is still damaged by it (and I totally get that).
How about seeing it more as a lesson?
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Black_Sunset
Amateur Anesthesiologist


Registered: 11/16/08
Posts: 2,451
Loc: Somewhere California
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
#23705524 - 10/04/16 12:09 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Wait wait... you went down on her, she said fuck me, you turned her around went down on her again, licked her ass, and then she flipped out? That's not a normal reaction from her. Also, you keep trying to suppress your desires for licking ass. Are you guys both repressed and indoctrinated into some kind of religious purity hetero-christian-normative sex cult? Eating ass is awesome, especially if you can surprise a new partner with a, 'Hey yeah I'm licking this and you love it I'm a sexy motherfucker!'
And your reactions are expected. You put yourself out there with this person. You got naked, intimate, invited her into your space and devoted yourself to pleasuring her. Fuck yeah you're gonna cry when she takes all that beautiful emotion and love you had created for her and then does a 180 on your head. Getting angry well that can be avoided but it sounds like an emotionally charged evening for you. Im not writing this to say what you did in response to her was right or wrong though.
Why are you even freaking out about the ass thing? Anal sex is awesome and even better if you like it. It has nothing to do with homosexuality, though homosexuals have anal sex obviously...just like everyone else. That chick was obviously too afraid of her own body for someone like you. You need to call this night a learning experience and move on. Maybe tread lighter next time and test the waters before you dive on in, but you also might know now that you want someone who is more comfortable with the things you enjoy. Go get em tiger
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Tuhdoww
Sub Slapper


Registered: 08/23/16
Posts: 300
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: Jokeshopbeard] 1
#23705528 - 10/04/16 12:11 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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That story had me rolling.
She's just like, "omg, quit licking my butthole already" lmfao. Damn dude.
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bloodsheen
ChemChaplin



Registered: 09/24/08
Posts: 7,659
Last seen: 4 years, 14 days
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: Black_Sunset]
#23705611 - 10/04/16 01:17 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Black_Sunset said: Wait wait... you went down on her, she said fuck me, you turned her around went down on her again, licked her ass, and then she flipped out? That's not a normal reaction from her. Also, you keep trying to suppress your desires for licking ass. Are you guys both repressed and indoctrinated into some kind of religious purity hetero-christian-normative sex cult? Eating ass is awesome, especially if you can surprise a new partner with a, 'Hey yeah I'm licking this and you love it I'm a sexy motherfucker!'
And your reactions are expected. You put yourself out there with this person. You got naked, intimate, invited her into your space and devoted yourself to pleasuring her. Fuck yeah you're gonna cry when she takes all that beautiful emotion and love you had created for her and then does a 180 on your head. Getting angry well that can be avoided but it sounds like an emotionally charged evening for you. Im not writing this to say what you did in response to her was right or wrong though.
Why are you even freaking out about the ass thing? Anal sex is awesome and even better if you like it. It has nothing to do with homosexuality, though homosexuals have anal sex obviously...just like everyone else. That chick was obviously too afraid of her own body for someone like you. You need to call this night a learning experience and move on. Maybe tread lighter next time and test the waters before you dive on in, but you also might know now that you want someone who is more comfortable with the things you enjoy. Go get em tiger
This is literally the most perfect possible response.
I'm really sorry OP that you had this experience. I'm a dude and if a girl licked my ass I would be ecstatic, a woman actually getting freaked out by something like that is insane. I'm gonna take a guess that she like probably isn't even old enough to drink, or if she is, just barely.
I know our words won't help but outside of your obviously (and previously admittedly) inappropriate placement of your anger, you did absolutely positively nothing wrong. Its literally never OK to do what you did, but I can totally get why.
What kind of girl is willing to get screwed in a car like some whore but butthole licking may as well be rape? Fucking madness man
Edit: I actually had a similar (although not quite as traumatic or ridiculous) experience. I was making out with a girl and it got pretty intense, and she ended up getting a nosebleed and dripping blood on my face. I thought it was hilarious as fuck, I laughed my ass off. I don't like snot or shit but pretty much every other bodily fluid I'm tolerant of. She got kind of embarrassed and was like "Goddammit, I swear I only get nosebleeds when I'm getting intimate with a guy." There was still some of her blood on her arm and to show I literally didn't care I dove in to lick it off. She like jerked back violently and was like "What are you doing?" ...But like, not in a scared or angry way like with you OP. Just slightly disturbed. I still felt like a total freak but she kept sleeping with me so I brushed it off.
So yeah man, just forget this uptight cunt, in ten years when shes come across people into things 10x kinkier than assholes she'll look back on this and want to apologize to you
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A cautious young fellow named Lodge / Had seat belts installed in his Dodge. / When his date was strapped in / He committed a sin / Without even leaving the garage. That's clever, isn't it?-A boy and his dog
Edited by bloodsheen (10/04/16 01:24 AM)
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Anonymous #2
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: bloodsheen]
#23705641 - 10/04/16 01:57 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Yeah dude try not to trip on that. You did nothing wrong sexually but the outburst seems to be a bit much, but I don't know how I would feel in that situation tho. Just try not to let it bring you down.
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Anonymous #3
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: bloodsheen]
#23705643 - 10/04/16 02:01 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Sounds like somebody who likes boring sex anyway, you dodged a bullet there if you ask me.
But hey, in my experience, (and I've had anal sex with several different women,) the best way to get a really uptight girl to do kinky but stuff with you is to have normal sex with her like five or ten times. Enough that she knows what to expect, you both figure out what positions work best for you, etc.
Then eat some MDMA with her. This is going to make her 100000x more receptive to kinky anal stuff. Eat her pussy for a loooong time. Assuming you can get her to bend over and stick her ass out so you can eat her from behind, when she's really feeling it start running your tongue closer and closer to her asshole. Usually women love this, especially if they're rolling.
You'll be able to feel how tense she is about this if she stiffens up like crazy when you start rimming her. You want your woman to associate ass play with good feelings, not just uncomfortable feelings, so do NOT lick/touch her ass unless your tongue is working pretty hard. Get a lot of saliva on the asshole, cause friction there is a huge turnoff for ladies.
Once you give them a good asshole licking, (they're always quite shocked by it the first time, but you should be able to pick up signals to figure out if she's ready for it,) you can move on to fucking them while rubbing their asshole with a finger.
Since there is already consensual penetration going on and her asshole should be slippery, she should like it and it should slide in a little ways pretty easy. Don't push it too far, just get them used to the idea.
Once you've done asshole stuff on MDMA, the girl will be a lot less surprised if you do that when you're not on MDMA, cause she'll know you like that and it won't be coming from out of the blue.
Give your partner as many orgasms as you can while eating ass/touching ass. The point is to wire her brain so that ass play = sexual pleasure. A lot of women don't come automatically feeling this way, especially if they're younger.
Sorry to hear about your story, friend. That chick sounds like she's got some issues that go way deep. At least you got to lick her asshole.
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Tuhdoww
Sub Slapper


Registered: 08/23/16
Posts: 300
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: Anonymous #3] 2
#23705659 - 10/04/16 02:21 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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"Give your partner as many orgasms as you can while eating ass/touching ass. The point is to wire her brain so that ass play = sexual pleasure. A lot of women don't come automatically feeling this way, especially if they're younger."
Rewire her brain to like it in the ass. It's like, science
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: Tuhdoww]
#23705851 - 10/04/16 06:49 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Anon #3 is the closest match to my own perspective here. OP you pushed some major boundaries on your very first sexual interaction with her. I'm not altogether surprised at her reaction. It was a bit OTT, but you forget (and of course I speak in generalisations here);
Unlike men, who are comparatively equal in how best to please, women are subtly different from each other. You have to get to know a woman physically, slowly and comfortably for her. You gotta pay attention to learn them well.
I mean think about it; as a man you can go from not thinking about sex at all to ready for sex in minutes (or seconds in your teens). But women take a lot more time and subtlety to be brought to that state.
I mean, you aint fucking a hooker here. You can't just go full retard on the first go. Lots of women got sexual hangups. Lots of people full stop in fact. If you just went all out for what you want, without considering her, and looking at cues for how she was feeling, then it aint surprising what happened.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Black_Sunset
Amateur Anesthesiologist


Registered: 11/16/08
Posts: 2,451
Loc: Somewhere California
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
#23706852 - 10/04/16 01:24 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said: Anon #3 is the closest match to my own perspective here. OP you pushed some major boundaries on your very first sexual interaction with her. I'm not altogether surprised at her reaction. It was a bit OTT, but you forget (and of course I speak in generalisations here);
Unlike men, who are comparatively equal in how best to please, women are subtly different from each other. You have to get to know a woman physically, slowly and comfortably for her. You gotta pay attention to learn them well.
I mean think about it; as a man you can go from not thinking about sex at all to ready for sex in minutes (or seconds in your teens). But women take a lot more time and subtlety to be brought to that state.
I mean, you aint fucking a hooker here. You can't just go full retard on the first go. Lots of women got sexual hangups. Lots of people full stop in fact. If you just went all out for what you want, without considering her, and looking at cues for how she was feeling, then it aint surprising what happened.
Truth
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: Black_Sunset] 1
#23707690 - 10/04/16 06:18 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Thanks guys. Lesson learned
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: Anonymous #1] 2
#23708388 - 10/04/16 10:08 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Cum-moon-ikation
Pretty much every problem could be prevented and plenty can be resolved with it.
You'll find a lady who's more open to ass play in the future op, but it is one thing you need to be sure she'd at least be willing to try first. For all she knew the next thing you were going to do is shove your dick in there. Which is a huge nono. You weren't telling her what you wanted so she had no idea. Speak. Plenty of girls like dirty/sex talk anyway.
But then, you was drunk, so shit happens.
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Free time is the only time
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bloodsheen
ChemChaplin



Registered: 09/24/08
Posts: 7,659
Last seen: 4 years, 14 days
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23708634 - 10/05/16 12:20 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
CookieCrumbs said: Cum-moon-ikation
Pretty much every problem could be prevented and plenty can be resolved with it.
You'll find a lady who's more open to ass play in the future op, but it is one thing you need to be sure she'd at least be willing to try first. For all she knew the next thing you were going to do is shove your dick in there. Which is a huge nono. You weren't telling her what you wanted so she had no idea. Speak. Plenty of girls like dirty/sex talk anyway.
But then, you was drunk, so shit happens.
You know, its really weird, but I would say I actually have more trouble with dirty talk than almost any sexual act. Its weird but I would be way more comfortable eating a girls asshole than talking about how I was going to eat her asshole 
Strange how our brains are wired
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A cautious young fellow named Lodge / Had seat belts installed in his Dodge. / When his date was strapped in / He committed a sin / Without even leaving the garage. That's clever, isn't it?-A boy and his dog
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100_the_cat

Registered: 09/27/16
Posts: 315
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23708686 - 10/05/16 12:52 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Not everybody's sexual element is the physical
It's only "insane" from the perspective of a physical person that someone wouldn't want physical sex, or would react badly to it.
I tried for a very long time to train myself, like mentioned above (minus drugs -- I did a lot of drugs, just not for sex), to be on board with physical sex. I tried several dozen different partners, thought for a while I might be gay, was in a relationship with a woman, but something still wasn't right. After years of psychological agony over this I realized my sexual element is the spiritual -- I have sex in my energy body, with what most people would call ghosts or demons. This is actually my natural, full-time, default setting.
Back when I was trying to make physical sex work, I had a lot of experiences where I reacted like the girl OP is talking about. Then I graduated to faking like I was enjoying it. Anal sex, blow jobs, all that. I knew it was expected of me so I did it even though I was dying inside. Sometimes I cried during sex. Sometimes I felt rage afterwards like I could've killed the person.
I put myself through all that because I understand the importance of sex for bonding. I was seeking resolution of my "hangup" because I wanted to someday have a fulfilling relationship with another person. So even though my sexuality riddle is solved, I'm now left with the prospect of being alone for the rest of my life!
It's pretty tough because there's not a lot of awareness out there like there is if you're gay or have a kink or something else that's different but still physical.
Also a chance she could've been molested or raped. Which of course is more traumatic the less physically oriented someone is.
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: 100_the_cat]
#23709193 - 10/05/16 08:14 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Wait your saying you have sex with incubi? (I think thats the plural of incubus )
Alot of girls corrupt their own psychological views on sex by trying to force themselves (or letting others talk them into) doing things they really don't want to do. It's almost like mentally/emotionally raping yourself. Cat, it sounds like you needed the foundation of a deep spiritual connection in order to enjoy sex. But depth is hard to find. Don't give up on the idea of finding a partner (a human one) but instead seek out individuals with that strong spirit you so desire.
A person like that would not demand physical sex from you and would, like you, enjoy the more spiritual side. I've combined spirituality into love making and, to be completely honest, it's pretty fucking amazing. But alot of people don't know how to make that connection. But if you look in the right places, or use the law of attraction as it is intended, you can find them.
I'm sorry you felt you had to force yourself to do so much you didn't want to do. I did much the same when I was young. We are older now and we know what we want, we know we do not need to do anything we don't want, and there are people out there that want what we want.
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Free time is the only time
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: bloodsheen]
#23709224 - 10/05/16 08:31 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
bloodsheen said:
Quote:
CookieCrumbs said: Cum-moon-ikation
Pretty much every problem could be prevented and plenty can be resolved with it.
You'll find a lady who's more open to ass play in the future op, but it is one thing you need to be sure she'd at least be willing to try first. For all she knew the next thing you were going to do is shove your dick in there. Which is a huge nono. You weren't telling her what you wanted so she had no idea. Speak. Plenty of girls like dirty/sex talk anyway.
But then, you was drunk, so shit happens.
You know, its really weird, but I would say I actually have more trouble with dirty talk than almost any sexual act. Its weird but I would be way more comfortable eating a girls asshole than talking about how I was going to eat her asshole 
Strange how our brains are wired
Heh agreed. I'm good with the dirty talk leading up to sex but once into it I have a horrible fear that I'm going to ruin the mood. So I usually more rely on what I can of body language and noises to show what I want. Or if I'm gonna do something that bothers alot of people I'll just straight ask. Ladies normally know what I'm into before we even get into it so I haven't had a problem yet. Only problem I've had is 'her' not telling me she doesn't want to do something and then makes me feel like a horrible half rapist afterward.
OP it's better she stopped you. Even if she could have done it in a better way.
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Free time is the only time
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23709651 - 10/05/16 11:31 AM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
CookieCrumbs said: Only problem I've had is 'her' not telling me she doesn't want to do something and then makes me feel like a horrible half rapist afterward.
I kind of felt like this the entire time.
I didn't necessarily like the fact that I was pushing for it soo much, when she clearly told me several times in the past that she wasn't ready.
All she wanted was for me to say that I was committed to her, but I couldn't, because we never had sex when we were dating. I considered that a necessary prerequisite for an exclusive relationship, but now that I think of it, maybe I should have reconsidered what "we had" instead of "what I could get". After that, we broke up and she said she would never date me again, but we still kept in touch.
Fast forward a month or so, and we started hanging out again and getting more physical. The fact that she was willing to give in just to "please me", but not because she genuinely wanted to, made me feel like I turned her against her own morals and I felt like a desperate, narcissistic asshole. I felt like I never won her over, it was just "charity sex", and I didn't feel like I deserved that.
She was such a quiet, introverted girl with family issues. I felt bad that I led her on this much. I cared for her, but our personalities just didn't mesh well from the start. I became needy early on and quickly became attached and confused this feeling with love.
And I always felt like she had the "power" in this relationship and that made me resent her. The lack of trust that I had in her was soo high, I couldn't believe a word that came out of her mouth. She told me early on that she had a lot of guy friends, but she would never date them. I never once believed this, and the entire time I was intimate with her, I thought she was banging them on the side and just holding out on me.
Ughh, it's soo hard to trust anyone
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub


Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23709775 - 10/05/16 12:10 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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It is. It kind of sounds like she had some trust issues herself when it came to being intimate. It's a sad situation all around. Shortly and sweetly it seems you 2 just weren't meant for eachother.
Your counter reaction to her reaction was bad. Bad enough that I'd think you have had bad experiences yourself. You both probably need to work through some stuff, separately. Reaction is rarely rational action. I don't imagine she felt good about her own reaction either.
It seems you have alot you can learn from the experience. Make note of the mistakes and instead of beating yourself up for them think about how you can do better in the next time. And you will. We are all learning all the time, the only real fools among us are the ones who refuse to learn.
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Free time is the only time
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NattyBoh
Stranger


Registered: 08/17/16
Posts: 14
Last seen: 5 years, 30 days
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23709807 - 10/05/16 12:26 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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You ain't a man till you eat a chic's ass! I actually ate my cream pie from my girl's ass then French kissed her. She absolutely loved it!
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Creeping out a girl in the worst possible way [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#23709813 - 10/05/16 12:29 PM (7 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
CookieCrumbs said: It is. It kind of sounds like she had some trust issues herself when it came to being intimate. It's a sad situation all around. Shortly and sweetly it seems you 2 just weren't meant for eachother.
Your counter reaction to her reaction was bad. Bad enough that I'd think you have had bad experiences yourself. You both probably need to work through some stuff, separately. Reaction is rarely rational action. I don't imagine she felt good about her own reaction either.
It seems you have alot you can learn from the experience. Make note of the mistakes and instead of beating yourself up for them think about how you can do better in the next time. And you will. We are all learning all the time, the only real fools among us are the ones who refuse to learn.
Thanks, you're right, I need to just let this go and move on. Dwelling on this everyday is taking a toll on my mental health. I need to get out there and meet more people and focus on making strong connections, rather than thinking "where this is going." Unreal expectations and having an agenda has been the #1 destroyer of every interpersonal relationship that I've ever had.
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