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Anonymous #1

I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become
    #23678301 - 09/25/16 10:42 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I have severe anxiety and depression, none of the meds I've been on having alleviated it. For that reason I have stopped taking meds (titrared off of course, didn't stop cold turkey). I also didn't want to become dependant. I have to do this on my own.

However, I dont know if I can. My anxiety affects my social skills and work. I can't seem to maintain or make meaningful relationships, and my anxiety keeps me from working and has led to me dropping out of college twice (combined with the motivation killing depression).

I live with my Mom, I'm 20, and I see more and more friends moving out and starting life. Even if it's just working shit jobs at Arby's, that's still more that I have. I just can't drag myself to work at a soul sucking job, and I don't have the motivation or mental health to make it through school. It sounds like a cop out but it truly isn't. I always end up having a severe mental breakdown mid semester and having to withdraw.

I sleep until noon everyday, I smoke pot and drop acid on the regular, I just feel like a loser. Maybe I'm lazy, maybe I suffer from some severe mental issues. I have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder, as well as major anxiety disorder.

I see myself being 30 and living at home, and my future is quite uncertain. Has anyone else been in similar ruts? Is it all fruitless for me? Or will it ultimately get better? I know I can't just wait for it to improve and that I must be proactive, Im just stuck in a hole at the moment...:frown:

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Invisiblenooneman
Male

Registered: 04/24/09
Posts: 14,612
Loc: Utah
Re: I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #23678306 - 09/25/16 10:47 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

You should add exercise into your routine. Lots of studies have shown it's as good for mental health as any current medication.

Keep trying at college, practice makes perfect. Smoke less pot for more motivation and drive. Possibly try to get some benzos for your anxiety, or some stimulants for your lack of motivation.

Figure out what you want to do with your life, where you want to be, and then figure out how to get there, and implement that plan. When that plain fails, do it again, and again, until you get it right.

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Offlinebloodsheen
ChemChaplin
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Registered: 09/24/08
Posts: 7,659
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
Re: I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become [Re: nooneman]
    #23678319 - 09/25/16 10:54 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I think mental illness is pretty much equal to drug addicts, with the only exception that the mentally ill have literally zero choice. You've gotta hit rock bottom and make a change. I got so depressed I moved accross the goddamn country. Running away hasn't helped my depression at all but I gotta say, those two months before I left and the first three months after I moved were fucking amazing. I kinda wish I had the stupidity and balls to just be a vagrant, change and new places are intoxicating


--------------------


A cautious young fellow named Lodge / Had seat belts installed in his Dodge. / When his date was strapped in / He committed a sin / Without even leaving the garage. That's clever, isn't it?-A boy and his dog

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Anonymous #1

Re: I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become [Re: nooneman]
    #23678320 - 09/25/16 10:54 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

nooneman said:
You should add exercise into your routine. Lots of studies have shown it's as good for mental health as any current medication.

Keep trying at college, practice makes perfect. Smoke less pot for more motivation and drive. Possibly try to get some benzos for your anxiety, or some stimulants for your lack of motivation.

Figure out what you want to do with your life, where you want to be, and then figure out how to get there, and implement that plan. When that plain fails, do it again, and again, until you get it right.




I appreciate the advice. I would love to exercise but I can't go to thr gym due to a anxiety,  and there is no good place in the immediate area to jog.

Benzos help tremendously, however I am two months outta rehab for benzo addiction. I like em too much unfortunately.

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OfflineSolivagant
Male User Gallery
Registered: 03/09/16
Posts: 105
Loc: The Universe
Last seen: 6 years, 2 months
Re: I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #23678364 - 09/25/16 11:09 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I haven't been diagnosed with anything nor do I pretend to know about serious mental health problems, but I've had an interesting life and I can tell you things always change. 20 is young--I'm 23, I'm young.

Got sick and was bed ridden for six months, hospitalized for almost a month, got better, went to college (after dropping out in 3rd grade, didn't even know my multiplication tables when I started college,) took 20 credit hours a semester, kept up the social life, was a musician in several bands, went through an engagement that ended horribly, a year of alcoholism, another bad relationship, burnt out on school, graduated, lost most of my social circles, was homeless for a month (somewhat by choice,) came home, and another bad relationship.

That brings us to now. This week has been nuts. I'm riding out a situation that's a bit more genuinely homeless, have had to deal with some tough family drama, and my dog died. On the plus side, I feel like I've finally started to figure out how to deal with life in the truly right way and am taking the steps necessary to make life worth living. I've met a girl who is crazy beautiful, smart, loves psychedelics, can take care of herself, and cares about me enough to stick around through hard times. I'm seeing how the actions I took in the past effected my life now as well as my mental space. I'm starting to see how to play this game right and I feel confident in doing so.

Point is, things change. Time brings its ups and downs. Learn from the downs and better your ups. You're still young, you have plenty of time to make a difference in the way things change.


--------------------
"Not all those who wander are lost."

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Invisiblenooneman
Male

Registered: 04/24/09
Posts: 14,612
Loc: Utah
Re: I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #23678369 - 09/25/16 11:11 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Buy some equipment for your home. Start with an adjustable dumbbell or a dumbbell set. Do pushups, situps, pullups if you can. Do high rep low weight or low rep high weight, whatever works best for you. Recent studies have shown that they're both just as effective.

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Anonymous #1

Re: I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become [Re: Solivagant]
    #23678374 - 09/25/16 11:14 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Man I know this is off topic, but I would LOVE a girl right now. But I know I have to work on me before I can handle a girl and give her my all.

I was in a terrible relationship about two years ago that kinda traumatized me in the love department. Not really complaining, it would just awesome to have some cuddles. anyway thst wad off topic

keep the advice coming guys, it is much appreciated  <3

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OfflineSolivagant
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Registered: 03/09/16
Posts: 105
Loc: The Universe
Last seen: 6 years, 2 months
Re: I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #23678386 - 09/25/16 11:20 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Girls definitely make life look a hell of a lot better, that's for sure. But make sure you put some work into yourself first. Lucky this girl came around right after I'd started figuring things out. And so far she's done nothing but help the process :smile:


--------------------
"Not all those who wander are lost."

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InvisibleSpellbound
PegasusTheFlyingHorse
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Registered: 02/13/16
Posts: 2,341
Loc: England Flag
Re: I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become [Re: Solivagant]
    #23678449 - 09/25/16 11:56 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Get up early, same time each day, go for a run. Do exercise like mentioned above sit up press ups etc if no equip. Cut weed down to evening only, i wouldnt trip at all for a few months. Eat organic. Lots fruit and veg and stay away from fast food. Drink water. Id even say detox all the crap out with zeolites or bentonite or something too.

Sounds basic but its amazing after a few weeks how different your body feels when given the right stuff.

And other advice above ^^ decide what youd ENJOY doing, and work towards that goal. Enjoy it as you go, as much as you can.

A girl is good, but can also add more stress too :lol: make sure to pick a good one lol, when you've done working on you :smile:


--------------------
Mescaline Tea - the one singular occasion of my entire life I cooked for 9 hours :lmafo:

The trick is to be yourself, in a world trying to make you like everyone else :heart:


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OfflineRollin.n.Strollin
Male


Registered: 07/25/16
Posts: 814
Loc: Australia Flag
Last seen: 2 years, 3 months
Re: I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #23678524 - 09/26/16 12:38 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Now you sound like someone with the potential to get motivated, and at least you want to snap out of it and get back out there. It's all about starting from the bottom of your problems and working up.

Address possible issues with yourself, if you think cannabis and acid are slowing you down, then you don't have to do them, you have all of the time in the world to do drugs, and I think if you fix yourself and come back (if you want to) then you'll definitely feel a lot more satisfied about doing so. Think about as looking into a mirror, you can see yourself there, what do you see in the mirror?

You will only get better if you get up and do it, don't ask us if you will get any better because there's only one person that can do that, it's you.

Good luck with it all, your welcome to :pm:

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Offlinestzacrack
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Registered: 05/07/05
Posts: 3,876
Loc: United States
Last seen: 2 days, 5 hours
Re: I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #23678928 - 09/26/16 07:18 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
I have severe anxiety and depression, none of the meds I've been on having alleviated it. For that reason I have stopped taking meds (titrared off of course, didn't stop cold turkey). I also didn't want to become dependant. I have to do this on my own.

However, I dont know if I can. My anxiety affects my social skills and work. I can't seem to maintain or make meaningful relationships, and my anxiety keeps me from working and has led to me dropping out of college twice (combined with the motivation killing depression).

I live with my Mom, I'm 20, and I see more and more friends moving out and starting life. Even if it's just working shit jobs at Arby's, that's still more that I have. I just can't drag myself to work at a soul sucking job, and I don't have the motivation or mental health to make it through school. It sounds like a cop out but it truly isn't. I always end up having a severe mental breakdown mid semester and having to withdraw.

I sleep until noon everyday, I smoke pot and drop acid on the regular, I just feel like a loser. Maybe I'm lazy, maybe I suffer from some severe mental issues. I have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder, as well as major anxiety disorder.

I see myself being 30 and living at home, and my future is quite uncertain. Has anyone else been in similar ruts? Is it all fruitless for me? Or will it ultimately get better? I know I can't just wait for it to improve and that I must be proactive, Im just stuck in a hole at the moment...:frown:




Get a manual labor job

Its good exercise that will alleviate your anxiety and better money than minimum wage

Take night classes and finish your degree

Eat healthy and mind your personal hygiene and appearance and you'll see these things combined will help you through this difficult time and also help make you a man

I have similar anxieties and I find that those things give me something to be proud of no matter what someone else's perception of myself May be

Also camaraderie at work will help satisfy the need for human interaction

Keep your chin up

Edited by stzacrack (09/26/16 07:19 AM)

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Anonymous #2

Re: I've become the guy your parents warned you not to become [Re: stzacrack]
    #23681349 - 09/26/16 09:19 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Anxiety and paranoia is a side-effect of weed.  It makes anxiety worse.  You're sabotaging yourself.

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