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Celestial Traveler
Random Observer



Registered: 03/03/11
Posts: 7,639
Loc: Idaho
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Have you ever had this really interesting mental phenomenon?
#23654207 - 09/17/16 09:48 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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The phenomenon in question is a disparity between mind and reality. Let me explain..
The first time that I really had feelings for a girl (back around 9th grade), is when I first noticed this phenomenon. It took me awhile to become aware of it though.
In my mind, when I thought of her, she would be represented by someone that looked completely different than her. In real life, this girl was Hispanic, but sometimes when I lay down to bed at night, I would think of her before falling asleep and in my mind she was a blond white girl.
You might read the above and speculate that I must have been half-asleep, because sometimes people and things look different in our dreams than they do in real life. But I have noticed this in the middle of daytime.
A couple years ago, I had a mescaline experience in which I was convinced that I was "meant to be" with a girl that I knew in real life, but in the experience (which was not that intense at all), I imagined her appearance much different than it actually was. Even though this was a drug experience and I wasn't sober, again I have noticed this phenomenon sober and awake.
Another semi-related phenomenon - I have often been unable to recall the faces of women that I have had feelings for in my mind. This would happen even when I saw these women or came into contact with them almost every day. This also used to be the case with my best friend whom I hadn't seen in a few years. Granted I had pictures of him to look at, so it wasn't because I had forgotten what he looked like. It seemed to me that this occurred with people whom I was very fond of.
Has anyone else experienced this type of distorted perception? OR is there a documented name given to the thing I'm talking about?
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saintpedro
nom nom nom

Registered: 04/06/06
Posts: 333
Loc: heliosphere
Last seen: 5 years, 6 months
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Re: Have you ever had this really interesting mental phenomenon? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
#23654402 - 09/17/16 10:53 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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I recall reading in some of Carl Jung's writings, the idea of psychological projection. Basically it is the idea that we project undesirable/unwanted aspects of our own psychological condition onto others (like if you are selfish, you'll tend to lament that others are acting selfishly). Carl Jung believed these undesirable aspects of our personality to be our psychological "shadow".
Anyway, based off this idea of psychological projection, came another idea called projective identification. And I believe that's the phenomenon you're referring to (seeing in your mind's eye a blond girl, not Hispanic). Projective identification in a relationship or personal bond is the projection of your ideal model of who you subconsciously want them to be, onto them. This goes beyond physical characteristics, but also extends to emotional states that your own mind primitively craves in a partner. It goes pretty deep, and I'm no psychologist so you may want to research it yourself But yeah, I totally know what you mean. I think it's your primitive brain creating it's own version of reality that sits best with your own mindset or ego.
Not remembering faces that are most familiar to you is something I've wondered about too. Like I can recall in crystal clear detail people I've met maybe only a few times (like friends of friends), but if I try to distill a clear mental image of someone I know very well (parents, siblings, partner)...nope, I've only got a vague sort of feeling. More an emotion than an image. Weird stuff.
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Celestial Traveler
Random Observer



Registered: 03/03/11
Posts: 7,639
Loc: Idaho
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Re: Have you ever had this really interesting mental phenomenon? [Re: saintpedro]
#23654508 - 09/17/16 11:40 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Thanks for that helpful information. I'm going to look more into it. One immediate thing I would like to say in response though, is that the blonde girl who replaced the Hispanic girl in my mind was not preferable to her, nor did I feel that she was a projection of who I wanted the Hispanic girl to be. I obviously liked the Hispanic girl the way she was...but if there was some quality in the blonde girl that was a projection of what I desired to see, I am not aware of what it is.
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