Hello, I'm very happy to have found this forum.
I'm in my late twenties. Californian, American, and Mexican.
With that said, this year was the first time I ever went on a journey into my brain.
The first time was amazing, the experience showed me how primitive we are and how much we hide it through different means. The ego I carried with me then was huge, now that I look back I couldn't believe the things I use to say or how careless I was of others. But it also made me realize how careless others were towards me as well. It was in March when I first saw the universe and it is beautiful. Overall it was a great trip. This first time I was physically all over the place, I just wanted to do things.
The second time (a couple months later), not so much. I got feelings that I never imagined I had. I couldn't breathe, the thoughts of how horrible nationalism is flooded my mind and how little we have accomplished as human beings made me sick, literally felt like vomiting. I kept asking myself what the purpose of life is, or where we came from, and that there must be a higher power. This trip changed my life in ways no one close to me ever imagined. I became more refined, I changed my whole lifestyle, I fixed who I was. They allowed me to see how much people took advantage of me, it connected all the "truths" I've been told and made me realized how much I had been lied to by friends, family, and the world around me. This was the most intense trip. This time I stayed indoor, in my room, alone, I dove really deep into my life.
I know much of this is vague but goodness these organic creations really make your insight change and show you hard realities that we tend to ignore.
The third time was the most recent. I wanted some closure and wanted to be more in control since at this point I knew what to expect. It was nothing compared to the last two times. I got pasty visuals, random patterns, and studdering. But nothing insightful came from them. I feel that at this point they had done their job and I no longer need to go on trips. But every time I had consumed them, it was a full eight. So I had 1 gram just out of curiosity and it was very mild but there definitely is no ego death involved. Very small effects, mostly felt tired and wanted to sleep.
Overall, I saw the truth, the universe, and my life from a different perspective. I have come to peace with myself after carrying a lot of psychological traumas. It was a blessing to been able to experience this.
I only wish I would have tried them at a younger age. But not really, because I found real love this last year. Being loved is the best feeling when it comes from someone who truly loves you for who you are. I have made all the right changes now to guide my life in the direction that I want with the right state of mind.
Hope you guys enjoy my rant. If you have any questions feel free to ask, I'm still getting acquainted with the forum.
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You might not need anymore trips at this time, but after you grow through a period of growth and integration you might return some day.
-------------------- The path of the herbalist is to open ourselves to nature in an innocent and pure way. SHe in turn will open her bounty and reward us with many valuable secrets. May the earth bless you. - Michael Tierra
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