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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Why are humans afraid of being alone?
    #23624183 - 09/07/16 10:50 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

I am trying to learn more about myself and have discovered that this could possibly be something that I experience myself - the fear of being alone.

I haven't used any drugs in a long time, but one of the most recent times that I smoked pot, I noticed a peculiar change in my mindset.  I was alone at the time and was having very sentimental thoughts, and I realized that the fact that these thoughts occurred inside my mind was enough to make them real;  whereas when I was sober, there were often times where I had certain thoughts, but didn't consider them "real" because I could never share them with anybody or make them understand.

Do you think that one reason why people fear being alone is that they don't trust the authenticity of their own experiences or thoughts without the validation of other people?


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Invisibleconnectedcosmos
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23624231 - 09/07/16 11:05 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Madness from being alone , one loses sanity without human interaction


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54. The true nature of things is to be known personally , through the eyes of clear illumination and not through a sage : what the moon exactly is , is to be known with one's own eyes ; can another make him know it?


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Invisibleconnectedcosmos
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: connectedcosmos]
    #23624234 - 09/07/16 11:05 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Think of feral children and feral animals


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54. The true nature of things is to be known personally , through the eyes of clear illumination and not through a sage : what the moon exactly is , is to be known with one's own eyes ; can another make him know it?


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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: connectedcosmos]
    #23624243 - 09/07/16 11:10 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

But why do they lose their sanity?


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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23624279 - 09/07/16 11:20 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

That's kind of what I was trying to explain in the OP.


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OfflineCrumist
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23627001 - 09/08/16 07:42 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:whereas when I was sober, there were often times where I had certain thoughts, but didn't consider them "real" because I could never share them with anybody or make them understand.


:feelsbadman: I know that feel. I'm growing old, wasn't the whole angsty "nobody understands me" emo shit supposed to be a phase back during teenagerdom? :frown:

Quote:

Do you think that one reason why people fear being alone is that they don't trust the authenticity of their own experiences or thoughts without the validation of other people?


Good observation. I'd go further and say most people are afraid of our own thoughts. A growing number of people practice meditation and a shrinking number practice prayer, but on the whole we are terrified of experiencing our consciousness in a blunt manner.

There is also the boring, biological, functional answer of we are evolutionary programed to be social as for the past 200,000 years of our ancestors (at the very least) co-operating with others was the only method of ensuring individual survival and it remains the only method of proving oneself "fit" and birthing offspring, selecting against loners. Only since the beginning of written history is hermatic life even remotely feasible, and then its likely the hermit isn't gonna fuck as much and therefore will have less kids and therefore will have their line die out.

EDIT:missing bracket


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'I am all for resources being allocated to the widowed single mother of 3, lost husband over seas fighting for our country. I am for vets getting mental health access and resources following war. I am not for free money cause a woman can't close her legs or some chump with low testosterone no going to work cause "i'm sad."' -finalexplosion
Nice knowin ya'll! https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/23904704/vc/1#23904704


Edited by Crumist (09/08/16 09:07 PM)


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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Crumist]
    #23627215 - 09/08/16 08:53 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Crumist said:


There is also the boring, biological, functional answer of we are evolutionary programed to be social as for the past 200,000 years of our ancestors .




Yeah I'm glad I didn't just get a bunch of those responses.  I feel like the tendency to answer all social questions through evolutionary theory is sometimes a lazy way to avoid delving into the deeper mechanics of something. 

And as for the emo thing, I hope that stereotypes don't muddle the point of what I'm saying here :sad: .  I'm not a teenager nor emo (never heard of an adult emo anyways lol).


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OfflineDocShamen
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23627375 - 09/08/16 09:54 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

hello Celestial Traveler. we meet once again.
this thought to has crossed my mind. maybe it is the fact of nothing on this earth is truely alone? biological life has a sense of being needed. such as multispores, they all come together to make a network. perhaps just the thought of being alone gives us our own form of dementia for the time being?


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Invisiblelaughingdog
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23627444 - 09/08/16 10:19 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:
I am trying to learn more about myself and have discovered that this could possibly be something that I experience myself - the fear of being alone.

Do you think that one reason why people fear being alone is that they don't trust the authenticity of their own experiences or thoughts without the validation of other people?




Many people have never spent much time alone. Many people are used to doing rather silly things (things that have no personal meaning, help no one, and won't matter at those times when life becomes serious) with friends and associates much of the time. So its an unknown for them. American consumer culture promotes this shallow way of living.

Teenagers in particular while they feel they are becoming free of their restrictive parents are actually very dependent on their peers' opinions. I suppose one could read all about this.

It's not like one has to try and imitate Thoreau. For example simply beginning to keep a dream journal, could be a step, toward exploring ones uniqueness and getting to know oneself better. One could wonder if there are many other simple activities of a similar nature.


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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: DocShamen]
    #23627469 - 09/08/16 10:28 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

DocShamen said:
hello Celestial Traveler. we meet once again.
this thought to has crossed my mind. maybe it is the fact of nothing on this earth is truely alone? biological life has a sense of being needed. such as multispores, they all come together to make a network. perhaps just the thought of being alone gives us our own form of dementia for the time being?




Interesting idea.


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OfflineDocShamen
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23627481 - 09/08/16 10:31 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

I do have to agree with the principal of biology. cells find themselves working better together than alone


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OfflineRJ Tubs 202
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: DocShamen]
    #23630623 - 09/09/16 08:57 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

We fear being alone for the same reason we fear being with others.


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OfflineDocShamen
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: RJ Tubs 202] * 1
    #23630642 - 09/09/16 09:02 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

RJ Tubs 202 said:
We fear being alone for the same reason we fear being with others.



so it's a paradox?


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Invisibledemiu5
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: connectedcosmos]
    #23631081 - 09/09/16 11:43 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

connectedcosmos said:
Think of feral children and feral animals






feral doesn't imply alone-ness


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channel your inner Larry David


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Offlinebeforethedawn
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: demiu5]
    #23631479 - 09/10/16 07:11 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

I'm not afraid of being alone - most of my time is in solitude, perhaps 90%

I explore reality, life, thoughts, love . . . perceptions, dimensions, music . . .

I've sort of dedicated my life to understanding reality through consciousness.

I recently bought some things to try and please myself. I think I've lost all interest in money now. Money will never bring happiness . . .

Other people, ya know . . . we're all alone. We're all alone. Things can emerge from intimacy and bonding, but ultimately, it's just yourself that is real and remains, and must try to understand our situation.

I sort of switch between that perspective, and just being a reasonable, friendly guy that drifts around, interacts a little, tries to make people happy, tries to buy stuff, tries to live the modern way.

When you get your consciousness on a certain level, absolutely everything is interesting.

I don't think we have anything going for us but consciousness expansion. The rest of nature is finished, complete, having a great time, all we have is consciousness, we need to push and press deep into what it is and how it can be expanded.

Who sees what you see in your higher consciousness but you?

So, this song captures it; no matter what . . . (we're all alone.)



Get to know yourself, you'll exist forever.



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Hostile humankind
Can't you see you're fucking blind?


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OfflineRJ Tubs 202
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: beforethedawn]
    #23634130 - 09/10/16 10:06 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

“All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone.”

Blaise Pascal


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OfflinePeyote Road
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler] * 1
    #23636984 - 09/11/16 08:05 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:
But why do they lose their sanity?




Because other minds are useful to correct the blind spots unique to yours. For example, if you start freaking out over something little and your friend is there, he can say to you "relax, man. You're just being paranoid". But if you're perpetually by yourself, you have no one there to check your neuroses and you start to lose the ability to discern between what is real and what is your mind playing tricks. Maybe you start to believe there is really a good reason to live in constant fear and paranoia.

I'm not necessarily saying everyone deprived of human contact will go insane. I'm sure there are people strong minded enough not to. But in general, humans are social creatures (at least somewhat) and are meant to learn and grow through the exchange of ideas. Human interactions also foster tremendous emotional growth and experience.


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The path of the herbalist is to open ourselves to nature in an innocent and pure way. SHe in turn will open her bounty and reward us with many valuable secrets. May the earth bless you. - Michael Tierra


Edited by Peyote Road (09/11/16 08:09 PM)


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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Peyote Road]
    #23637018 - 09/11/16 08:16 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Peyote Road said:
Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:
But why do they lose their sanity?




Because other minds are useful to correct the blind spots unique to yours. For example, if you start freaking out over something little and your friend is there, he can say to you "relax, man. You're just being paranoid". But if you're perpetually by yourself, you have no one there to check your neuroses and you start to lose the ability to discern between what is real and what is your mind playing tricks. Maybe you start to believe there is really a good reason to live in constant fear and paranoia.

I'm not necessarily saying everyone deprived of human contact will go insane. I'm sure there are people strong minded enough not to. But in general, humans are social creatures (at least somewhat) and are meant to learn and grow through the exchange of ideas. Human interactions also foster tremendous emotional growth and experience.




I like that response.  :thumbup:


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23637262 - 09/11/16 09:48 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Because humans are social beings, and solitude is a violation of one's social nature. However, one can make an intentional sacrifice of creating a family, a "Neutral Game," for a 'higher game"'plan. There are both "Low Games" beneath the "Householder Game" and "High Games" above it. Both high and low games may require sacrifices of family, friends, one's Maslowian "Belongingness Needs," for both selfless and selfish motivations. I am referring to Robert De Ropp's thesis The Master Game, which has profoundly influenced my own life. Here is a synopsis:  http://www.livereal.com/spiritual_arena/spiritual_members/master_game.htm


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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OfflineLucisM
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23637322 - 09/11/16 10:22 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

I don't worry about being alone, most of the time I am alone, I have been like that since I was young, being alone doesn't bother me one bit.


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©️


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OfflineDuncan Rowhl
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Lucis]
    #23637823 - 09/12/16 07:08 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Those who like being alone are beings who know the all-one.


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InvisibleDividedQuantumM
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23638040 - 09/12/16 09:26 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

"We are all alone, born alone, die alone, and -- in spite of True Romance magazines -- we shall all someday look back on our lives and see that, in spite of our company, we were alone the whole way. I do not say lonely -- at least, not all the time -- but essentially, and finally, alone. This is what makes your self-respect so important, and I don't see how you can respect yourself if you must look in the hearts and minds of others for your happiness." --Hunter S. Thompson


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Vi Veri Universum Vivus Vici


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OfflineLove_spirit
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23638058 - 09/12/16 09:40 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Some people need constant ego confirmation.


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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23638069 - 09/12/16 09:43 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

I think being afraid left me when
I became comfortable with not knowing who I am.


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Offlinebeforethedawn
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Love_spirit]
    #23639249 - 09/12/16 05:56 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Great Hunter quote.

Poor dude went too far with them uppers though. He was basically retarded by the end. :frown:


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Hostile humankind
Can't you see you're fucking blind?


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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: beforethedawn]
    #23639703 - 09/12/16 08:05 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

beforethedawn said:
Great Hunter quote.

Poor dude went too far with them uppers though. He was basically retarded by the end. :frown:




You never go full-blown retard.


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OfflineCrumist
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: beforethedawn]
    #23640698 - 09/13/16 06:08 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

beforethedawn said:
Great Hunter quote.

Poor dude went too far with them uppers though. He was basically retarded by the end. :frown:



From what I've read about him, he went the way he wanted to go. Blowing his brains out in the presence
of his grandchildren was a very uncool move, but he clearly gave 0 fucks :shrug:

Happiness only real when shared. -- Christopher McCandless (probably only from his sisters novelization tbh)


--------------------
'I am all for resources being allocated to the widowed single mother of 3, lost husband over seas fighting for our country. I am for vets getting mental health access and resources following war. I am not for free money cause a woman can't close her legs or some chump with low testosterone no going to work cause "i'm sad."' -finalexplosion
Nice knowin ya'll! https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/23904704/vc/1#23904704


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Invisibledemiu5
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Crumist]
    #23641156 - 09/13/16 10:28 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Crumist said:
Quote:

beforethedawn said:
Great Hunter quote.

Poor dude went too far with them uppers though. He was basically retarded by the end. :frown:



From what I've read about him, he went the way he wanted to go. Blowing his brains out in the presence
of his grandchildren was a very uncool move, but he clearly gave 0 fucks :shrug:

Happiness only real when shared. -- Christopher McCandless (probably only from his sisters novelization tbh)





it's not like he did it right in front of them.  not saying it wasn't still a potentially traumatic event for them, but it's different to be a direct witness to the act and to witness the result.


as well, he was very open about how he would go out, if he had his choice.  my 65 year old friend's dad did the same thing one evening of a family gathering.  he was also pretty open about taking his own life with a pistol.  none of them were shocked.  the father went out on an up-note with the people he loved nearby at his own home.


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channel your inner Larry David


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OfflineCrumist
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: demiu5]
    #23641819 - 09/13/16 02:39 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

I can't say I understand why one would choose shooting themself as the way out,
but to each his own. Inert gas (or N2O) asphyxiation or barbituate OD would
probably be my preference. Much cleaner, more reliable, perhaps even a hell of a trip.


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'I am all for resources being allocated to the widowed single mother of 3, lost husband over seas fighting for our country. I am for vets getting mental health access and resources following war. I am not for free money cause a woman can't close her legs or some chump with low testosterone no going to work cause "i'm sad."' -finalexplosion
Nice knowin ya'll! https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/23904704/vc/1#23904704


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OfflineRJ Tubs 202
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Love_spirit]
    #23643478 - 09/13/16 11:54 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Love_spirit said:

Some people need constant ego confirmation.




Of course there's the famous 2013 study published in the journal Science that showed many
people, especially men, would rather receive an electrical shock than sit silent in a room alone.

Why would many people rather receive an electrical shock than sit quietly alone?

The answer to that question explains a lot.


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Invisibledemiu5
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
    #23644231 - 09/14/16 09:56 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

RJ Tubs 202 said:
Quote:

Love_spirit said:

Some people need constant ego confirmation.




Of course there's the famous 2013 study published in the journal Science that showed many
people, especially men, would rather receive an electrical shock than sit silent in a room alone.

Why would many people rather receive an electrical shock than sit quietly alone?

The answer to that question explains a lot.





stimulation, baby


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Invisiblelaughingdog
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: demiu5]
    #23644411 - 09/14/16 11:31 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

RJ Tubs 202
... The answer to that question explains a lot.




The answer to that question explains a lot.

Quote:

demiu5 said:
... stimulation, baby




more than just stimulation i think ...

animals would never do such a thing ...

perhaps this interesting book, partially explains it:

“Dependent Arising In Context: the Buddha's core lesson, in the context of his time and ours”January 5, 2013
by Linda S Blanchard

Paperback: 144 pages

ISBN-10: 1481259547
ISBN-13: 978-1481259545


from a review:

…”The general idea, it seems to me, of DA in modern terms is that we condition ourselves (just as Pavlov conditioned his dogs), through our constant self talk / thinking / categorizing / judging / believing and automatic: bodily reactions / tensions: of either liking, disliking, or ignoring every perception as it arises.

All day long we do this unconsciously continually reinforcing our concepts of who/what we think we are.

As a result we take impersonal existence and take it personally, thus suffering unnecessarily. And also fail to see reality as it is. Perhaps the use of steps is meant to make the whole process of self creation so clear that it is seen through. In any case it is a radical idea, even today. As fellow reviewer James Diggle says If we don't look for this basic dynamic or drive, which propels most others, it is easily missed. That would be the first step - ignore-ance. Once we are alert that there is "so to speak" an 'inner itch' like a needy child that constantly wants attention, that manifests by interpreting the whole world in relation to itself the possibility of an alternative becomes interesting…”

so really, it seems to me the shocking is functioning as a distraction, ...

from possibly noticing, (when activity & life is unstructured), the main compulsion that drives us

namely to constantly reaffirm a made up identity, and avoid the unknown


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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: laughingdog]
    #23644449 - 09/14/16 11:47 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

IME, most people see sitting quietly, in a sterile room with no audio/video, as a complete lack of input (stimulation).  Since almost-constant distraction (stimulation) is the norm, any perceived lack of input makes most people uncomfortable.  Despite the "pain" of an electrical current, it is no surprise that the average person would choose to receive some, any form of input compared to no input; the pain is likely comforting and reassuring that one is not "alone" or "isolated"


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Invisiblelaughingdog
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: demiu5]
    #23645396 - 09/14/16 06:04 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

demiu5 said:
... Since almost-constant distraction (stimulation) is the norm,...




ok let's leave the Buddhist analysis out of it for now...

it may be the 'norm', but 'normals' are already dead inside, any creative person has an inner life and multiple interests and imagination.

Think of all the charachters that populate novels, for example.

the wonderful irony of course is that these were college students,
ie those supposedly developing their minds

http://io9.gizmodo.com/we-would-rather-do-anything-than-sit-and-think-for-15-m-1601049602

"...First, they had college students spend between 6 and 15 minutes alone in an unadorned room. ..."

the irony continues when we remember any good hunter has no problem staying alert, physically still, attentive, & calm, without even the entertainment of the imagination.
No need to be an artist or meditator, just being in touch with our  basic healthy animal style of attention, is enough.


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Offlinedonaldkagan
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: laughingdog]
    #23645399 - 09/14/16 06:05 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

It's more interesting to ask, "why aren't all humans afraid of being alone"?


--------------------
אורים ותמים


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Invisibledemiu5
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: laughingdog]
    #23645422 - 09/14/16 06:21 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

laughingdog said:
Quote:

demiu5 said:
... Since almost-constant distraction (stimulation) is the norm,...




ok let's leave the Buddhist analysis out of it for now...

it may be the 'norm', but 'normals' are already dead inside, any creative person has an inner life and multiple interests and imagination.







i certainly don't disagree


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channel your inner Larry David


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OfflineRJ Tubs 202
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: demiu5]
    #23654499 - 09/17/16 11:36 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

demiu5 said:

IME, most people see sitting quietly, in a sterile room with no audio/video, as a complete lack of input (stimulation).




But the mind constantly generates a massive number of thoughts. Sit quietly and count thoughts. It's incredible.

These thoughts are very stimulating. They can cause a change in breathing and heart-rate.





"My mind is like a bad neighborhood. I try not to go there alone."

Anne Lamott


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Invisibledemiu5
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
    #23654548 - 09/18/16 12:01 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

RJ Tubs 202 said:
Quote:

demiu5 said:

IME, most people see sitting quietly, in a sterile room with no audio/video, as a complete lack of input (stimulation).




But the mind constantly generates a massive number of thoughts. Sit quietly and count thoughts. It's incredible.

These thoughts are very stimulating. They can cause a change in breathing and heart-rate.





"My mind is like a bad neighborhood. I try not to go there alone."

Anne Lamott






i agree.  i'd wager the najority of people don't


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channel your inner Larry David


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OfflineTameMe
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: demiu5]
    #23662747 - 09/20/16 07:06 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

After a prolonged state of isolation...any human will diminish....

is it really fear...or is it a contrived modern convention? did our societal evolution bring rise to habitats and/or scenarios that brought individuals to prolonged periods of isolation for a myriad of reasons.

Is fighting the fear of being alone a possible false rationalization that contentedness in oneself and oneself alone is ultimate goal?

we need others....with out others we lose literally everything, mental faculties, resources, humanity...


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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: demiu5]
    #23662824 - 09/20/16 07:26 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

demiu5 said:
Quote:

RJ Tubs 202 said:
Quote:

demiu5 said:

IME, most people see sitting quietly, in a sterile room with no audio/video, as a complete lack of input (stimulation).




But the mind constantly generates a massive number of thoughts. Sit quietly and count thoughts. It's incredible.

These thoughts are very stimulating. They can cause a change in breathing and heart-rate.





"My mind is like a bad neighborhood. I try not to go there alone."

Anne Lamott






i agree.  i'd wager the najority of people don't




Perhaps it is unrelated, but why does it matter what the majority do?  Why do people always feel the need to compare themselves to the majority?  Does this give them some form of comfort?


--------------------
Funny Video              Pokemon But With Animals Instead              B


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Offlinebigdoodie
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23664550 - 09/21/16 10:01 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Emotions are the cause of loneliness.

Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:
Quote:

demiu5 said:
Quote:

RJ Tubs 202 said:
Quote:

demiu5 said:

IME, most people see sitting quietly, in a sterile room with no audio/video, as a complete lack of input (stimulation).




But the mind constantly generates a massive number of thoughts. Sit quietly and count thoughts. It's incredible.

These thoughts are very stimulating. They can cause a change in breathing and heart-rate.





"My mind is like a bad neighborhood. I try not to go there alone."

Anne Lamott






i agree.  i'd wager the najority of people don't




Perhaps it is unrelated, but why does it matter what the majority do?  Why do people always feel the need to compare themselves to the majority?  Does this give them some form of comfort?




We use the actions of others as examples to justify our views and make ourselves look better. If we were the last person alive, we would not have an opinion.


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OfflineKickleM
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: TameMe]
    #23666015 - 09/21/16 06:59 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

TameMe said:
we need others....with out others we lose literally everything, mental faculties, resources, humanity...




Uh? Based on what?

Jetsumna Tenzin Palmo for instance speant 12 years in isolation. She has some of the most loving words I've ever heard or read and she has moved woman a long ways in Tibetan Buddhism a testament to her mental faculties. Check out: Into the Heart of Life if you're interested.


--------------------
Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


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OfflineKickleM
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: bigdoodie]
    #23666019 - 09/21/16 07:01 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:
Perhaps it is unrelated, but why does it matter what the majority do?  Why do people always feel the need to compare themselves to the majority?  Does this give them some form of comfort?




It gives me a form of comfort, yes. Intellectual conflicts are fine but emotional ones are much more difficult in the day-to-day. So IMO one has to pay attention to the majority flow if they do not want perpetual emotional conflicts with others. Lacking conflict is a form of comfort IMO.


--------------------
Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


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OfflineMorel Guy
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Kickle]
    #23668709 - 09/22/16 04:56 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

I have spent a lot of time alone and I enjoyed cannabis due to feeling I had company.  I spent time thinking with people in mind and some was conversational.  It's easy and very difficult to imagine exactly how people would react.  Tv provided some interactive type thinking.  I had yet to learn online forums.  I tend to have life forces or spirits that stick around me.  I am certain I can make a heaven out of my consciousness when I give up on my human self that deals with risk, relax reward.


--------------------
"in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur"

In filth it will be found in dung it will be found


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OfflineKickleM
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Morel Guy]
    #23668822 - 09/22/16 05:35 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Why be certain of something that hasn't yet happened? Seems presumptive or even wishful.


--------------------
Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


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OfflineMorel Guy
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Kickle]
    #23668833 - 09/22/16 05:38 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Fantisful


--------------------
"in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur"

In filth it will be found in dung it will be found


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OfflineKickleM
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Morel Guy]
    #23668836 - 09/22/16 05:38 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

i'm with you then :thumbup:


--------------------
Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


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OfflineMorel Guy
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Kickle]
    #23668871 - 09/22/16 05:53 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

I like fantasy but finding fulfilling and perfect fantasy seems hard. I use it to pass the time and to create.  Drugs alter fantasy and I see nothing wrong with that.  Error in fantasy can occur without drugs or mental illness.


--------------------
"in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur"

In filth it will be found in dung it will be found


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OfflineKickleM
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Morel Guy]
    #23668878 - 09/22/16 05:55 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

no fantasy makes for a dull boy. i know because I can be that dull boy due to often lacking fantasy


--------------------
Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


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OfflineMorel Guy
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Kickle]
    #23668890 - 09/22/16 06:00 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Fantasy always takes parts from reality.  When it is totally real it is science.  Fantasy is where the shaman gets it's magic.  Fantasy may be the afterlife and I have zero problems with that!


--------------------
"in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur"

In filth it will be found in dung it will be found


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OfflineKickleM
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Morel Guy]
    #23668901 - 09/22/16 06:03 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

i don't disagree
but i don't agree either

someone needs convincing for magic to work
whether that be through misdirection
or straight up force of will

and i've got a pretty strong will so i'm pretty tough to sell
but sometimes I enjoy participating just for the hell of it :thumbup:

I'm outa here hope you have a great night :heart:


--------------------
Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


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OfflineMorel Guy
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Kickle]
    #23668956 - 09/22/16 06:21 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Magic is just fine alone but to impress people it takes convincing via duplication.  My experience is true magic is not replicable exactly the way it went down.


--------------------
"in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur"

In filth it will be found in dung it will be found


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OfflineRJ Tubs 202
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: bigdoodie]
    #23669944 - 09/23/16 01:46 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

bigdoodie said:

We use the actions of others as examples to justify our views and make ourselves look better.

If we were the last person alive, we would not have an opinion.






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Offlinesoviet_the_kid
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
    #23669967 - 09/23/16 02:22 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

I like to think that when a person is alone with their thoughts long enough it can start to get to them and sometimes those thoughts are too much to bare, or something like that. lol


--------------------
How far must I go to gain respect? Um.
Well, it's kind of simple, just remain your own
Or you'll be crazy sad and alone.
-A Tribe called Quest


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OfflineMorel Guy
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: soviet_the_kid]
    #23670250 - 09/23/16 07:17 AM (7 years, 4 months ago)

That can happen around people to.  Why so many people with anxiety have comping mechanisms.  Social lubricants and such


--------------------
"in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur"

In filth it will be found in dung it will be found


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Offlinesoviet_the_kid
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: Morel Guy]
    #23672459 - 09/23/16 10:17 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Yeah maybe it just depends on who you are. Extroverts probably have a harder time being alone than introverts.


--------------------
How far must I go to gain respect? Um.
Well, it's kind of simple, just remain your own
Or you'll be crazy sad and alone.
-A Tribe called Quest


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OfflineRJ Tubs 202
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Re: Why are humans afraid of being alone? [Re: soviet_the_kid]
    #23675523 - 09/24/16 11:22 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

soviet_the_kid said:
I like to think that when a person is alone with their thoughts long enough it can start to get to them and sometimes those thoughts are too much to bare, or something like that. lol




well said!

Which begs the question, what is it about or thoughts that's so difficult?

It is the emotions they create?

Why do we need a drink or a pill or a shot or a puff to dull our experience?


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