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liquidlounge

Registered: 12/22/10
Posts: 9,256
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Help with mental issue...
#23582962 - 08/27/16 10:08 AM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Hi, please help me sort out what I'm struggling with! 
My psychosis lasted 3 years and ended May/June 2016, at the very end of this psychosis I have experienced weird mental effects.
I can best describe it as a feeling of pressure in my mind, not physically but mentally. With lots of thoughts about things that went on in my mind when I was psychotic. And whenever I think of different people or situations it becomes embarrasing, it's very exhausting and annoying, and like I wrote, it feels embarrasing and awkward. This happens on the night and goes on for a few hours. It seems like the effects increase whenever I'm in social situations that might feel uncomfortable, or if a lot happens in a short time, stress(?). But I still get the pressure even if I'm not socializing, it's like I overanalyze social situations. And I guess it happens from 1 to 4 days/week. Sometimes 2 days in a row. But when it's over I feel fine. I've been psychotic for the past 3 years but not anymore, I wonder if this is after effect of my psychosis. I'm on 10 mg cipralex/day and 100 mg (needle) xeplion/month.
Thanks!
-------------------- As far as I assume to know...
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Psilosopherr
A psilly goose



Registered: 02/15/12
Posts: 12,278
Last seen: 1 month, 10 days
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I recommend reading carl jung to every psychotic asking for advice. Legendary psychologist who went through psychosis himself for multiple years and wrote about his experiences in "The Red Book."
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beforethedawn
Registered: 06/19/16
Posts: 1,859
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
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Alright - first of all. . .
Discard the embarrassment, the guilt. Fuck it off. Right now.
It wasn't your fault, and "they" don't think it's your fault, and "they" are getting on with their lives, and it is only your abstract thought process that has been compromised through brain chemistry issues that makes you think otherwise.
It is not real. The guilt, the awkwardness. It's not real. Very common in psychotic disorders.
Feels a little . . . persecutory? It's just your brain, targeting itself. It doesn't know what's happening.
Now, as for the pressure in your mind, I understand also. Sort of a depersonalisation and derealisation as the 'pressure' builds?
So there's probably a bit of brain damage from the episode.
So let me tell you a secret - And take me seriously, please . . .
a) God is all there is.
b) you are God.
c) God does not forsake one who has surrendered.
If you get it right, if you just come off the pretense, you will begin to rapidly heal, and realise -
LIFE IS NOT WHAT IT APPEARS TO BE
and there is a way out of every situation, bar perhaps losing a limb.
Good luck, there really isn't more to say, Read David Godman's "BE AS YOU ARE"
Try to come off the game, it's not working out, it's not so playful right now.
See you brother.
-------------------- Hostile humankind Can't you see you're fucking blind?
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liquidlounge

Registered: 12/22/10
Posts: 9,256
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Thanks for the heads-up, but please don't derail this thread any further.
-------------------- As far as I assume to know...
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Psilosopherr
A psilly goose



Registered: 02/15/12
Posts: 12,278
Last seen: 1 month, 10 days
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was that considered de-railing..? fine, cya.
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beforethedawn
Registered: 06/19/16
Posts: 1,859
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
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Did he mean me?
It's difficult to swallow, it's far-fetched, but it's true that you create reality and that's the only real way out of brain damage.
EDIT -
Oh the pressure in the skull and losing your shit in social situations is probably the antipsychotic.
-------------------- Hostile humankind Can't you see you're fucking blind?
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ByCoverOfNight
SirPsyOps
Registered: 07/21/16
Posts: 68
Loc: Arkham Asylum
Last seen: 7 years, 4 months
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Just ask for some fucking Xanax. Most of your shit is anxiety. You could be hallucinating zombies and enough Xanax would make it tolerable.
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Spiralspider
Bigguy

Registered: 06/20/16
Posts: 223
Last seen: 2 months, 29 days
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That happened to me too before I started taking antipsychotics which you take too. What I have noticed was that I analyse it more when I give it more importance. You need to change your ideas about social situations . You maybe are to convict and convinced that what you interpret is the only explanation. You should definetly dig more of what you see. Maybe your personality is kind a detective like and you are repressing your need to know more before you take it to conclusions.
Has a poster said the life is not what it appears to be and maybe you dont want to hear different sides of other perceptions.
Im just giving a idea. Edit: it still happens to me while on aps
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paper clip1
Stranger
Registered: 08/28/16
Posts: 1
Last seen: 7 years, 5 months
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Well yeah the feelings you are experiencing are quite common in people who went through psychotic episode. Now when clarity of thinking is back, you come to realise how fucked up your perception and behouvior was. Memories of wiered and embarrassing situations you were involved in surface up and can occupy your mind at times and this can be quite exhausting or overwhelming. Especially when those flashbacks hit you in social situations and keep lowering your self confidence.
IMO that's a part of you healing, there is no way around that and those feeling are not something to be avoided or repressed, and by repressed I mean silent by antidepressants and/or other substances or by building some sort of mental protection in the form of another delusion like God is all there is and he protects me and stuff like that. I think those will only delay your recovery and you going back to being your 100% functioning self.
Sure it hurts, but in time it will hurt less and will be less common occurrence to the point you won't longer be bothered by past memories. But at the same time will have this realisation of differing healthy and unhealthy behouvior scince in the back of your head you will know that psychosis and delusion have a price, those a reminder to not enter psycho zone again.
Time is key here, you have to engage in social situations and rebuild your self confidence. Gaining new positive experiences will have you dwelling on some healthier and more productive past memories that will replace the unhealthy ones, but again that shit takes time.
Feel good brah Keep healthy
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Midnight_Toker
Gone Fishin'


Registered: 09/26/10
Posts: 11,589
Loc: Canada
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Hey ll, I'm glad to see you're climbing your way out of the place you were stuck.
It's not surprising that you're feeling the way you are right now. 3 years is quite a long time for your mind to be operating in a different way, so I think it's normal to expect some level of weirdness and especially social pressure while you re-learn how to live a normal life again.
You might feel like you don't know how to properly interact anymore after being 'out there' for so long, but it's just social anxiety. There is no need to analyze social situations so much because people aren't thinking as deeply into the conversations as you are, and if they are, they're anxiously analyzing themselves, not you.
Before he started talking about God, the guy above made a good point. The things you feel embarrassed about are in the past, and good people are inherently forgiving and will be happy to forget about those things now that you're past that.
The only person judging the crap out of you is yourself. I know it's easier said than done, but if you're busy over-analyzing everything, or freaking out about whether or not you're being silently judged for something you just said, your social interactions are going to suffer. Social situations become fun again when you stop constantly thinking about the fact that you're in a social situation and just join the conversation fully. Concentrate on the other person, not your own mind; let yourself be interested in what they're saying. Things will flow naturally at that point because you're not wasting all that brainpower on negative stimuli that causes so much anxiety.
I would suggest looking into Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. You can do it all on your own, no need for a doctor. It's just a matter of learning to recognize your negative/anxiety inducing thoughts as they come up and considering whether they are even valid thoughts or not. You'll be surprised to find how often the negative thoughts you have are just automatic responses to stimuli that come from a completely illogical place. If you are able to realize how automatic and illogical the thoughts you have are, you'll be able to change them from bad to good, from unhealthy to healthy.
Once you are able to control your thoughts a little better so that they aren't inherently negative or anxiety inducing, you won't feel so much pressure anymore. You've already proven that you can do so much by pulling yourself out of psychosis. You'll get through this as well, it just takes time.
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RJ Tubs 202


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,016
Loc: USA
Last seen: 15 hours, 46 minutes
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Quote:
liquidlounge said:
I can best describe it as a feeling of pressure in my mind, not physically but mentally. With lots of thoughts about things that went on in my mind. . .
To become obsessed with thoughts is common. You don't need drugs.
Social anxiety is not a mental illness requiring drugs to remedy.
Stress is a thinking disorder. Social stress is fear.
Would you be willing to list the thoughts you have in stressful social situations?
"People might think I'm stupid", and/or other thoughts?
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beforethedawn
Registered: 06/19/16
Posts: 1,859
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
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Re: Help with mental issue... [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
#23598490 - 08/31/16 06:29 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Sorry my post was definitely a derail.
But,
The brain.
...
Blame it soley, would be my approach. Attempt to fix it, don't go with "I'm disempowered", ever.
Supplements, meditation, whatever else you can find. Good diet? Exercise increases brain chemicals.
-------------------- Hostile humankind Can't you see you're fucking blind?
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RJ Tubs 202


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,016
Loc: USA
Last seen: 15 hours, 46 minutes
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It's interesting to drill down to the root cause of our "embarrassment".
The precise thoughts that generate such a feeling.
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