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Offline28064212
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An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members * 11
    #23581663 - 08/26/16 08:33 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I've been procrastinating writing this, but I need to. With the passing of Slothie, who knows when any of us will croak... and I want to make sure I write this before anything happens to me or anymore of us.

I'm Nick, aka 28064212, aka FRACTALife on the Growery (though I forgot my password there and haven't been on in ages) and most of you probably know me.

First I just want to say sorry to my friends on here for my behavior in the past and some of the untrue and inappropriate threads I've made in the past. I get teased a lot for it and take it, but I have changed a lot, and am sorry.

In the past year I've battled amphetamine and benzo addiction, been to jail, sorta became an alcoholic and sort of beat that, and been through a lot of weird shit. It's been hard- but I am happy to say that going through all of this has made me a better person. I am doing pretty well right now, with the help of my positive attitude and will power- with a little help from psychedelics, meditation and cannabis.

I have beat the amphetamine problem and the alcohol one too- and am doing pretty good with the benzos.

You all are very important to me and I might not post much now a days but the shroomery will always be part of my life; I read pubs threads and the WCA everyday. If someone in the WCA wants to give a heads up to our friends in that thread about this thread I'd appreciate it.


I'm just a bit drunk and vaping cannabis, smoking some :cig:s, and thinking of you all.

Questions and comments welcome and appreciated- love you all. :hug:


:volcano::yinyang::cheers:


--------------------


Edited by 28064212 (08/26/16 09:35 PM)


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OfflineLogicaL ChaosM
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: 28064212]
    #23581709 - 08/26/16 08:45 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Touching. :hug:

Stay alive Nick. Stay alive for us all....


--------------------
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OfflinePartoftheSource
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: 28064212] * 3
    #23581710 - 08/26/16 08:45 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

What do the numbers, "28064212" mean to you?


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OfflineSunnyD
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: 28064212]
    #23581713 - 08/26/16 08:46 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

The people and love here is surreal


--------------------
:sunny::inlove::peyotespectrum::peyotespectrum::inlove::sunny:
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This is the time in life I am living!
And I face each day with a smile :smile:
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Offlineelementblazin
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: 28064212] * 2
    #23581714 - 08/26/16 08:46 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I love you and feel almost the exact same way. I love this community. I am sorry for any bullshit I've said or gotten into with ANYONE.

This is an important place for a lot of us. A second home to some.
I know it's saved my life multiple times.

Thanks Nick, and thanks The Shroomery. You both rock!!!



I too have gone through a LOT in the past 8 months to a year. An insane amount, including my little brother dying at age 21 in a car accident all his fault. He was the only one involved. But I thank my lucky stars that I'm still here, I don't know how I am, and he isn't honestly with how many times I fucked up and how careful my brother USUALLY was.

Man sucks bad how one stupid little mistake can end your life.

Something so.... Permanent. Death... It's just the final chapter to Life.

Love you guys;
:heartpump: :peace: :heartpump: :peace: :heartpump: :peace:


--------------------
My CA Legend:
A plus sign (+) means I took it within 20 minutes of then.
A minus sign (-) means I took it more than 20 minutes ago, but it's still active.


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Offline28064212
Special Agent Dale Cooper
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: PartoftheSource] * 1
    #23581721 - 08/26/16 08:49 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

PartoftheSource said:
What do the numbers, "28064212" mean to you?





It's just from the movie Donnie Darko :frank:
It's how long until the world ends- 28 days six hours 42 minute and 12 seconds.



--------------------


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Offline28064212
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: elementblazin] * 1
    #23581741 - 08/26/16 08:53 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

SunnyD said:
The people and love here is surreal





:hug: love you man, thanks :heart:


Quote:

elementblazin said:
I love you and feel almost the exact same way. I love this community. I am sorry for any bullshit I've said or gotten into with ANYONE.

This is an important place for a lot of us. A second home to some.
I know it's saved my life multiple times.

Thanks Nick, and thanks The Shroomery. You both rock!!!



I too have gone through a LOT in the past 8 months to a year. An insane amount, including my little brother dying at age 21 in a car accident all his fault. He was the only one involved. But I thank my lucky stars that I'm still here, I don't know how I am, and he isn't honestly with how many times I fucked up and how careful my brother USUALLY was.

Man sucks bad how one stupid little mistake can end your life.

Something so.... Permanent. Death... It's just the final chapter to Life.

Love you guys;
:heartpump: :peace: :heartpump: :peace: :heartpump: :peace:





THank you man, I know you well and read all your posts in the WCA and know about your brother and wish you the best. That stuff is incredibly painful. I know it a little and don't wish to know any more of it at all. But pain can make us stronger, even if it's sucks. I love you so much man and also love your CA choices.

Here is a good quote from true detective that Frank says to a little kid after his dad died.


Quote:

“Things are gonna be hard for a while, but you'll come out. 'Cause you got him in you. His fight is in you. Sometimes, a thing happens, splits your life. There's a before and after. I got like five of them at this point. And this is your first. But if you use it right, the bad thing, you use it right, and it makes you better. Stronger. It gives you something most people don't have. Bad as this is, wrong as it is... this hurt... it can make you a better man. That's what pain does. It shows you what was on the inside. And inside of you is pure gold. And I know that. Your father knew that, too. Pure, solid gold. That's what you got."




--------------------


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Offline28064212
Special Agent Dale Cooper
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: LogicaL Chaos]
    #23581748 - 08/26/16 08:54 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

LogicaL Chaos said:
Touching. :hug:

Stay alive Nick. Stay alive for us all....





I'm not planning on going anywhere anytime soon.



--------------------


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Offlineelementblazin
Cruisin' on that LSD
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Registered: 09/20/09
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: 28064212]
    #23581790 - 08/26/16 09:08 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

28064212 said:
Quote:

SunnyD said:
The people and love here is surreal





:hug: love you man, thanks :heart:


Quote:

elementblazin said:
I love you and feel almost the exact same way. I love this community. I am sorry for any bullshit I've said or gotten into with ANYONE.

This is an important place for a lot of us. A second home to some.
I know it's saved my life multiple times.

Thanks Nick, and thanks The Shroomery. You both rock!!!



I too have gone through a LOT in the past 8 months to a year. An insane amount, including my little brother dying at age 21 in a car accident all his fault. He was the only one involved. But I thank my lucky stars that I'm still here, I don't know how I am, and he isn't honestly with how many times I fucked up and how careful my brother USUALLY was.

Man sucks bad how one stupid little mistake can end your life.

Something so.... Permanent. Death... It's just the final chapter to Life.

Love you guys;
:heartpump: :peace: :heartpump: :peace: :heartpump: :peace:





THank you man, I know you well and read all your posts in the WCA and know about your brother and wish you the best. That stuff is incredibly painful. I know it a little and don't wish to know any more of it at all. But pain can make us stronger, even if it's sucks. I love you so much man and also love your CA choices.

Here is a good quote from true detective that Frank says to a little kid after his dad died.


Quote:

“Things are gonna be hard for a while, but you'll come out. 'Cause you got him in you. His fight is in you. Sometimes, a thing happens, splits your life. There's a before and after. I got like five of them at this point. And this is your first. But if you use it right, the bad thing, you use it right, and it makes you better. Stronger. It gives you something most people don't have. Bad as this is, wrong as it is... this hurt... it can make you a better man. That's what pain does. It shows you what was on the inside. And inside of you is pure gold. And I know that. Your father knew that, too. Pure, solid gold. That's what you got."






Thanks so much for that. You have no idea how much it means to me to know people here care and want to help. I love the Quote. What's it from?


--------------------
My CA Legend:
A plus sign (+) means I took it within 20 minutes of then.
A minus sign (-) means I took it more than 20 minutes ago, but it's still active.


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Invisiblethizzlemaniac
राम राम
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Posts: 2,240
Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: 28064212]
    #23581818 - 08/26/16 09:17 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

28064212 said:
Quote:

PartoftheSource said:
What do the numbers, "28064212" mean to you?





It's just from the movie Donnie Darko :frank:
It's how long until the world ends- 28 days six hours 42 minute and 12 seconds.






Good movie. Take a rip for me I can't smoke...


--------------------
Hi how are you? How high are you?



:aum:


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Offlinexbloodwhipx

Registered: 02/24/12
Posts: 12,791
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: thizzlemaniac]
    #23581830 - 08/26/16 09:24 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I remember you from awhile ago.

I also beat pretty bad amphetamine addiction. Like 120mg adderall or 240mg vyvanse a day for around a year (jan 2012-december 2012).

Its a bitch, but IME you once you get over it you never want to touch them again. I did 150mg vyvanse like march of last year and it just made me sick, weird feeling, anxious, and I crashed extremely hard.

That was after 2 years of not touching amphs.


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InvisibleModestMouse
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: xbloodwhipx]
    #23581835 - 08/26/16 09:26 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Amphetamine addiction
:ilold:

Regardless,

:cheers: to the rest buddy.


--------------------
Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?


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OfflineThe Ecstatic
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Registered: 11/11/09
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: ModestMouse]
    #23581842 - 08/26/16 09:28 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Glad to hear youre doing better, Nick.


Keep on keeping on buddy, I enjoy your posts. :thumbup:


--------------------


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Offlinexbloodwhipx

Registered: 02/24/12
Posts: 12,791
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: The Ecstatic]
    #23581847 - 08/26/16 09:30 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

ModestMouse said:
Amphetamine addiction
:ilold:

Regardless,

:cheers: to the rest buddy.




Don't really know how to reply to this, except by insulting you. You fucking cunt.


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Offline28064212
Special Agent Dale Cooper
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: elementblazin]
    #23581853 - 08/26/16 09:31 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

elementblazin said:
Quote:

28064212 said:
Quote:

SunnyD said:
The people and love here is surreal





:hug: love you man, thanks :heart:


Quote:

elementblazin said:
I love you and feel almost the exact same way. I love this community. I am sorry for any bullshit I've said or gotten into with ANYONE.

This is an important place for a lot of us. A second home to some.
I know it's saved my life multiple times.

Thanks Nick, and thanks The Shroomery. You both rock!!!



I too have gone through a LOT in the past 8 months to a year. An insane amount, including my little brother dying at age 21 in a car accident all his fault. He was the only one involved. But I thank my lucky stars that I'm still here, I don't know how I am, and he isn't honestly with how many times I fucked up and how careful my brother USUALLY was.

Man sucks bad how one stupid little mistake can end your life.

Something so.... Permanent. Death... It's just the final chapter to Life.

Love you guys;
:heartpump: :peace: :heartpump: :peace: :heartpump: :peace:





THank you man, I know you well and read all your posts in the WCA and know about your brother and wish you the best. That stuff is incredibly painful. I know it a little and don't wish to know any more of it at all. But pain can make us stronger, even if it's sucks. I love you so much man and also love your CA choices.

Here is a good quote from true detective that Frank says to a little kid after his dad died.


Quote:

“Things are gonna be hard for a while, but you'll come out. 'Cause you got him in you. His fight is in you. Sometimes, a thing happens, splits your life. There's a before and after. I got like five of them at this point. And this is your first. But if you use it right, the bad thing, you use it right, and it makes you better. Stronger. It gives you something most people don't have. Bad as this is, wrong as it is... this hurt... it can make you a better man. That's what pain does. It shows you what was on the inside. And inside of you is pure gold. And I know that. Your father knew that, too. Pure, solid gold. That's what you got."






Thanks so much for that. You have no idea how much it means to me to know people here care and want to help. I love the Quote. What's it from?





Oh man, you are loved. I read your posts in WCA all the time and love them. And the quote is from the TV show on HBO called True Detective like I said.

I highly recommend the show. Both seasons- each has different actors and different stories. The first had rave reviews and starred Matthew Mconhhgey (i know that is mispelled) and Woody Harrelson- so good.

The second season, which the quote is from, had amazing acting from Vince Vaughn, Rachel McAdams, and Colin Farrel and this Taylor dude and I thought it was just as good- but it didn't get as good reviews becuause it had a tragic ending. But what can you expect- one of the main characters was named Antigone, it was a greek tragedy from the start, but so good.


--------------------


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Offline28064212
Special Agent Dale Cooper
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: xbloodwhipx]
    #23581881 - 08/26/16 09:42 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

xbloodwhipx said:
I remember you from awhile ago.

I also beat pretty bad amphetamine addiction. Like 120mg adderall or 240mg vyvanse a day for around a year (jan 2012-december 2012).

Its a bitch, but IME you once you get over it you never want to touch them again. I did 150mg vyvanse like march of last year and it just made me sick, weird feeling, anxious, and I crashed extremely hard.

That was after 2 years of not touching amphs.




I know you quite well and love your threads, your a great poster. :thumbup:


Yeah most times i touch them now I end up regretting it and giving in to just jerking it and chain smoking.... but if I can gain some self control and peace of mind, which I have and am working on, I do think amphetamines can still be useful to me every once in a while for my writing or big projects....


I mean I was on them for years from when I was prescribed them as a young teen until I was 21, so my brain is missing a little something without them; but I know my place with them now and won't ever make the same mistakes again.


--------------------


Edited by 28064212 (08/26/16 09:43 PM)


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Offline28064212
Special Agent Dale Cooper
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: 28064212]
    #23583508 - 08/27/16 01:20 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I love you all :heart:


Ps I Hope asante, and Burke and the wca crew like cog n Moonie read this


--------------------


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Offline28064212
Special Agent Dale Cooper
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: 28064212]
    #23583511 - 08/27/16 01:20 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

And Crystal


Fuck I hope everyone


--------------------


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InvisibleDustBunnyM
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: 28064212]
    #23584429 - 08/27/16 05:21 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Having linked to it in WCA, I bet pretty much everyone posting right now will see; Seems like most regulars read every thread. I'm bad with what to say about stuff like this, but it's always nice seeing you posting, and am really glad to hear you're doing better. A ton of us have had our own struggles, especially at your age, but the sooner you address and fix them, the better/easier it will be. I've always figured you'd post regularly again in the future.


--------------------


Edited by DustBunny (08/27/16 05:22 PM)


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InvisibleAsante
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Re: An open letter to the Shroomery mods and members [Re: 28064212] * 1
    #23586778 - 08/28/16 12:31 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

28064212 said:
I've been procrastinating writing this, but I need to. With the passing of Slothie, who knows when any of us will croak... and I want to make sure I write this before anything happens to me or anymore of us.

I'm Nick, aka 28064212, aka FRACTALife on the Growery (though I forgot my password there and haven't been on in ages) and most of you probably know me.

First I just want to say sorry to my friends on here for my behavior in the past and some of the untrue and inappropriate threads I've made in the past. I get teased a lot for it and take it, but I have changed a lot, and am sorry.

In the past year I've battled amphetamine and benzo addiction, been to jail, sorta became an alcoholic and sort of beat that, and been through a lot of weird shit. It's been hard- but I am happy to say that going through all of this has made me a better person. I am doing pretty well right now, with the help of my positive attitude and will power- with a little help from psychedelics, meditation and cannabis.

I have beat the amphetamine problem and the alcohol one too- and am doing pretty good with the benzos.

You all are very important to me and I might not post much now a days but the shroomery will always be part of my life; I read pubs threads and the WCA everyday. If someone in the WCA wants to give a heads up to our friends in that thread about this thread I'd appreciate it.


I'm just a bit drunk and vaping cannabis, smoking some :cig:s, and thinking of you all.

Questions and comments welcome and appreciated- love you all. :hug:


:volcano::yinyang::cheers:






Wowww you have been way up shit creek without a paddle, its good you got through the most of that and now are on the mend.

You're a good presence here in the community, maybe we can help you straighten yourself out by offering you solace, a home away from home to relax and regain yourself.

The Shroomery is that for many people, it has been for me when right after my heart attack my mother died, it can be that for you in your Year Of Hell.

Hang in there!



--------------------
Omnicyclion.org
higher knowledge starts here


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