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Offlinemorrowasted
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Share your dating profiles with us
    #23570665 - 08/23/16 09:10 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I stole this cuz it was just too rich to pass up. Will it work? Doubt it.

Through my dealings with the fairer sex over the previous 25 years I have become completely disillusioned with females (all people really, but I’m not trying to date guys) and have now resorted to the internet in an effort to find one that I can at least tolerate for extended periods of time.You want to know about me? I’ll tell you what I’m not.

1) I am not your father. I will not tolerate childish bullsh*twhen you don’t get your way and I will not throw money at you to shut you up.

2) I am not your hobby. That’s why you have friends. This road goes both ways though, and you’re not expected to join me on any trips you don’t want to. I’ve got friends for that too.

Here’s where we get to you. As a staunch rationalist, I realize you’re probably every bit as bitter with men as I am with you r**** compatriots, possibly having almost given up on us. My (admittedly weak) theory is you have not yet lost all hope but have simply turned to a less social lifestyle and are casually perusing the PoF personals just waiting for my ad to pop up so we can end our days in perpetual bliss or whatever storybook fantasy those cookie cutter girls get off on.

I am not an extremely picky guy. Being my dream girl is more a matter of the things you aren’t than the things you are.

My ideal woman:
-when asked about her hobbies, has more to say than, “Like, you know, stuff,” or the always popular “shopping, hanging out, music, friends.”
-can think outside her own head and understand that while her wants and needs are her priority (and there’s nothing wrong with that), those around her have their own desires.
-takes care of herself to some degree. We can’t help certain aspects of our appearance, but if you don’t bathe regularly and have eaten yourself fat it demonstrates a fatal lack of respect for yourself that one would expect to bleed into other aspects of your behavior.

If you’ve read this much crap and are actually interested, we might just stand a chance. Send me a message that makes me think, laugh, or hope.


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Invisibleplasma
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570677 - 08/23/16 09:13 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

No tldr? Summarize this shit in 1 word


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InvisibleFrozenHappiness
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 6
    #23570684 - 08/23/16 09:15 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

If you're fishing for that saltiest, bitterest fish in seas you may get a couple of nibbles on that particular bait.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 3
    #23570701 - 08/23/16 09:18 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Some negative vibes brah..  :sad:


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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: plasma]
    #23570705 - 08/23/16 09:18 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

plasma said:
No tldr? Summarize this shit in 1 word




Anus.


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Offlinemorrowasted
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23570714 - 08/23/16 09:22 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:
Some negative vibes brah..  :sad:



Sure, whatever. It's honest and intended to be funny and straightforward. I want a low-maintenance girl and won't tolerate bullshitting. I'd rather wait for the right woman than waste time, effort, and resources pretending to be something I'm not.


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Invisibleplasma
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570719 - 08/23/16 09:23 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

What ever happened to that tinder whoor you corralled


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InvisibleAhab McBathsalts
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570723 - 08/23/16 09:24 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I once made a profile that made reference to having an explicit fetish for balloons. It was strangely successful.

I haven't done online dating in some time and have reverted to picking up waitresses and bartenders.


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"Nobody exists on purpose. Nobody belongs anywhere. Everybody's going to die."


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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570732 - 08/23/16 09:28 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

morrowasted said:
Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:
Some negative vibes brah..  :sad:



Sure, whatever. It's honest and intended to be funny and straightforward. I want a low-maintenance girl and won't tolerate bullshitting. I'd rather wait for the right woman than waste time, effort, and resources pretending to be something I'm not.




It didn't come off as "funny and straightforward."  You have to think about how they see it, which you obviously know but still.

Most guys I know claim to want a low-maintenance girl.  I don't think I've ever heard a guy claim to want a high-maintenance one, but yet they have them.  So that's a pretty common request and doesn't really differentiate you.

Also there's not really any info about you in that post, just about what kind of girl you want.

You should be sure to inform them that your favorite pastime is rescuing cute and furry animals from imminent death.


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Celestial Traveler] * 5
    #23570750 - 08/23/16 09:32 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

my first date section on pof:
"I pack myself into a suitcase, and you pack yourself a suitcase full of a million dollars. My butler and you both appear to be talking on the phone while walking down the street towards each other. Seemingly by accident, my butler and you knock into each other and the suitcases fall out of your hands. You grab each other's suitcases, and continue walking.

My butler gets the Mil, and you get me, firmly packed inside a suitcase."


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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OfflineLove_spirit
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 1
    #23570753 - 08/23/16 09:32 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Even if you are/looking for a loser you'll have better luck with a profile that isn't so depressing.


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InvisibleOgla
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23570758 - 08/23/16 09:33 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

you must be reading my mind cause i just set up a POF account and a badoo account. Hoping to find some cool peeps


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Offlinemorrowasted
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: plasma]
    #23570764 - 08/23/16 09:33 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

plasma said:
What ever happened to that tinder whoor you corralled



I dunno what you're referring to but I've never had a tinder profile


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InvisiblePatrickKn
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Love_spirit] * 3
    #23570765 - 08/23/16 09:33 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

It doesn't really come off as funny at all. Almost mean, but not really. It's weird.

I think Sheekle's is a far better pick-up paragraph.


Edited by PatrickKn (08/23/16 09:33 PM)


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Offlinemorrowasted
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570771 - 08/23/16 09:34 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
my first date section on pof:
"I pack myself into a suitcase, and you pack yourself a suitcase full of a million dollars. My butler and you both appear to be talking on the phone while walking down the street towards each other. Seemingly by accident, my butler and you knock into each other and the suitcases fall out of your hands. You grab each other's suitcases, and continue walking.

My butler gets the Mil, and you get me, firmly packed inside a suitcase."



idgi. how much acid were you on when you came up with this?


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 11
    #23570779 - 08/23/16 09:36 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

none

how much broken dreams were you on when you decided yours was a good idea?


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Offlinemorrowasted
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: PatrickKn] * 1
    #23570782 - 08/23/16 09:37 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

PatrickKn said:
It doesn't really come off as funny at all. Almost mean, but not really. It's weird.

I think Sheekle's is a far better pick-up paragraph.



You've gotta have a dark, cynical sense of humor to appreciate it. That's rare in humans, especially in females. Most people prefer lighthearted, "haha" sense of humor that doesn't force them them to confront the darker side of the human condition. But when a female does have one, wow- what a turnon. I met a girl with a very cynical sense of humor recently and I'm so insanely attracted to her even though she dresses and does her hair like a boy and is extremely gay :sad: Also I just don't understand Sheekle's. It's like it starts off as a joke but has no real punchline


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Offlinemorrowasted
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570785 - 08/23/16 09:37 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
none

how much broken dreams were you on when you decided yours was a good idea?



all of them


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 3
    #23570792 - 08/23/16 09:38 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

a bunch of girls have profiles like yours, and none if them seem like a joke. theyre actually that sad and bitchy. you're probably not gonna pull any chicks with your depressingass profile just change it to something cool instead


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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InvisibleModestMouse
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570793 - 08/23/16 09:39 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Online dating is kind of sad
It appears to be effective but it's still sad

Using tinder to bang easy peasy hoes though ain't no thang. That's fun when you're horny and single/barred out

:barbershreds:


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570802 - 08/23/16 09:40 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Like Dr. Cox humor, off of Scrubs?

I try but I just don't see the humor in the post, sorry...that's just my interpretation.


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: ModestMouse]
    #23570803 - 08/23/16 09:41 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

haha what the hell how is it sad it's the entire point of social media and networking is to meet new people to share adventures and fun times with


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Offlinemorrowasted
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570812 - 08/23/16 09:42 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
a bunch of girls have profiles like yours, and none if them seem like a joke. theyre actually that sad and bitchy. you're probably not gonna pull any chicks with your depressingass profile just change it to something cool instead



that's fine, I hadn't gotten any nibbles with my previous "upbeat" happy-go-lucky normal sense of humor profile anyway literally in years anyway. So I'd rather leave something up there that reflects the way I really feel and not get any nibbles than have some bullshit front and not get any nibbles


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Celestial Traveler] * 2
    #23570816 - 08/23/16 09:43 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Wait...You stole this? As in you couldn't even find your own way to say "I'm a jaded judgmental asshole. Do not respond to this if you are needy or fat. I don't have any money for any of you bitches so don't fucking ask. Be interesting and entertaining for my grumpy ass to be around. Drop a line. Or don't. Or whatever."

Lame.

Edit: meant To reply to OP and not Celestial Traveler


--------------------
"You are a ghost driving a meat coated skeleton made from stardust. What do you have to be scared of?"


Edited by Patchouli_Savage (08/23/16 09:44 PM)


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InvisibleModestMouse
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570818 - 08/23/16 09:43 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

It's sad because it takes a lot of guesswork and adventure out of dating and meeting people. It becomes like a video game, where you choose the stats of the person you think is most compatible based on pics of their bewbz and witty bios

It's sad.
I don't care if it's effective it's still sad.


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Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570824 - 08/23/16 09:45 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

they prolly know its all a lie and u secretly hate everything or sumthin


ur supposed to message them btw they rarely message u, girls are submissive pussies who arw afraid of everyhing


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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InvisibleModestMouse
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570825 - 08/23/16 09:45 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

:barbershreds:


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: ModestMouse]
    #23570827 - 08/23/16 09:46 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

thats one sad way to look at it even tho its really not even sad


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Offlinemorrowasted
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23570833 - 08/23/16 09:47 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:
Like Dr. Cox humor, off of Scrubs?

I try but I just don't see the humor in the post, sorry...that's just my interpretation.



The humor mostly lies in the irony. You're expecting to read something that makes you feel good and what you get is something that doesn't. The other part of the humor is in the writing style. It's a fairly clever social commentary ("My (admittedly weak) theory is you have not yet lost all hope but have simply turned to a less social lifestyle and are casually perusing the PoF personals just waiting for my ad to pop up so we can end our days in perpetual bliss or whatever storybook fantasy those cookie cutter girls get off on.") I am not tooting my own horn when I say that, because remember, I stole this from somewhere else. I just thought it was very funny and relatable.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle] * 1
    #23570835 - 08/23/16 09:47 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

It really is though sheeks
We're so consumed with serializing, compacting, and condensing things for our convenience that we lose sight of when that becomes "too much". Online dating is an example of it becoming too much.

One day you won't even be meeting real women you'll just be selecting options on a switchboard so you can have VR sex with some binary silicon slut

You think I jest, just wait


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Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?


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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570838 - 08/23/16 09:49 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Yeah I see what you're getting at and I got that from the beginning, but I can see how that would easily not be interpreted as humor, especially coming from behind a computer screen.


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Offlinemorrowasted
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570843 - 08/23/16 09:49 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
they prolly know its all a lie and u secretly hate everything or sumthin


ur supposed to message them btw they rarely message u, girls are submissive pussies who arw afraid of everyhing



See, that's the thing. I don't want a submissive pussy. I want a low-maintenance, independent woman who is confident is smart and self-confident and who takes the initiative. And yes, I do sometimes send messages on the rare occasion that a profile appeals to me. As I said, I would rather wait for the RIGHT girl than waste effort on the same kind of girls that have just annoyed me in the past.


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Offlinemorrowasted
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23570846 - 08/23/16 09:50 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:
Yeah I see what you're getting at and I got that from the beginning, but I can see how that would easily not be interpreted as humor, especially coming from behind a computer screen.



Well I interpreted it as humor from behind a computer screen


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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570848 - 08/23/16 09:51 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

But you're not a girl..  >_<


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 1
    #23570850 - 08/23/16 09:51 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Have a female friend help you seriously. No shirtless selfies.

I don't think most people use tinder to just fuck the pain away. I have been just chatting up with a few women on there besides 2 out of around 30 matches  just wanted to hook up.
But then again I'm rusty as fuck and just getting out of a nearly 10 year relationship I thought was going to last my lifetime.

To be honest I don't want random sex , I want someone I can connect with and will hold me , that what fucks you up having no one to talk to or no physical contact.

Op no offense but dude seriously you sound seriously salty. Maybe you can learn to love yourself first. Yeah there are some women who will use you and leave you with nothing and a gun in your hand. But you got to not be so jaded. It's hard as fuck.


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I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.



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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23570853 - 08/23/16 09:52 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I'm the type of guy who makes what you would call "cynical" jokes from time to time, and people often don't realize that I'm joking.  So maybe that's affecting my judgment but others seem to have similar opinions as well.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Patchouli_Savage]
    #23570854 - 08/23/16 09:52 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Patchouli_Savage said:
Wait...You stole this? As in you couldn't even find your own way to say "I'm a jaded judgmental asshole. Do not respond to this if you are needy or fat. I don't have any money for any of you bitches so don't fucking ask. Be interesting and entertaining for my grumpy ass to be around. Drop a line. Or don't. Or whatever."

Lame.

Edit: meant To reply to OP and not Celestial Traveler



It honestly never occurred to me to take this approach. I just stumbled across this and thought it was great, so yes, I stole it. Sue me.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23570857 - 08/23/16 09:52 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:
But you're not a girl..  >_<



Aaand here we go with sexism


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 1
    #23570862 - 08/23/16 09:53 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

:gooby:


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570864 - 08/23/16 09:54 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

ModestMouse said:
It really is though sheeks
We're so consumed with serializing, compacting, and condensing things for our convenience that we lose sight of when that becomes "too much". Online dating is an example of it becoming too much.

One day you won't even be meeting real women you'll just be selecting options on a switchboard so you can have VR sex with some binary silicon slut

You think I jest, just wait



yeah we should all rob the blind instead, it's not like people have been gossiping about and expanding on their romantic preferences with their friends since the dawn of time or anything :laugh2: nd its not like people meet outside of dating sites all the time either :rolleyes:

whats sad is all the centuries behind us and even in the world today of girls being forced into marriage they didnt wanna be in all throughout history i mean god forbid people can find ways to relate to each other in a more efficient way


Quote:

morrowasted said:
Quote:

Sheekle said:
they prolly know its all a lie and u secretly hate everything or sumthin


ur supposed to message them btw they rarely message u, girls are submissive pussies who arw afraid of everyhing



See, that's the thing. I don't want a submissive pussy. I want a low-maintenance, independent woman who is confident is smart and self-confident and who takes the initiative. And yes, I do sometimes send messages on the rare occasion that a profile appeals to me. As I said, I would rather wait for the RIGHT girl than waste effort on the same kind of girls that have just annoyed me in the past.



you're never gonna pull someone in with that dating profile no matter how sad they are dude wtf :haha:


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: trekie]
    #23570878 - 08/23/16 09:56 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

trekie said:
Have a female friend help you seriously. No shirtless selfies.

I don't think most people use tinder to just fuck the pain away. I have been just chatting up with a few women on there besides 2 out of around 30 matches  just wanted to hook up.
But then again I'm rusty as fuck and just getting out of a nearly 10 year relationship I thought was going to last my lifetime.

To be honest I don't want random sex , I want someone I can connect with and will hold me , that what fucks you up having no one to talk to or no physical contact.

Op no offense but dude seriously you sound seriously salty. Maybe you can learn to love yourself first. Yeah there are some women who will use you and leave you with nothing and a gun in your hand. But you got to not be so jaded. It's hard as fuck.



If a woman can show me a reason not to be so jaded, maybe I won't be. Also, did you actually look up my profile? Yes, I have a shirtless selfie. It's probably the only reason I've gotten the few messages I have, to be perfectly honest. Most women filter out anyone who makes below a certain salary. I know because I have multiple female coworkers who use the website and they cannot find me on there when they do a search in my zip code. Why? Their search parameter is limited by guys who make more money than they- or I- do. Of course. They want a man who can take care of them, and their potential offspring.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: ModestMouse] * 1
    #23570880 - 08/23/16 09:56 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

ModestMouse said:
It's sad because it takes a lot of guesswork and adventure out of dating and meeting people. It becomes like a video game, where you choose the stats of the person you think is most compatible based on pics of their bewbz and witty bios

It's sad.
I don't care if it's effective it's still sad.




I feel the same about it

Except for hookup sites, that's just easy sex

:noargument:


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle] * 1
    #23570882 - 08/23/16 09:56 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)



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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570887 - 08/23/16 09:58 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

morrowasted said:
They want a man who can take care of them, and their potential offspring.




You just did a sexism..  :sad:


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Repertoire89]
    #23570889 - 08/23/16 09:58 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

you're never gonna pull someone in with that dating profile no matter how sad you are dude wtf :haha:



Like I said it's not really about pulling anyone in. I haven't actually met someone through a dating website since I was 19- in 7 years. It's about making a statement. If people read it and understand it and it makes them think, that is a better use of my profile than what it was before


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Repertoire89]
    #23570892 - 08/23/16 09:59 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Repertoire89 said:
Quote:

ModestMouse said:
It's sad because it takes a lot of guesswork and adventure out of dating and meeting people. It becomes like a video game, where you choose the stats of the person you think is most compatible based on pics of their bewbz and witty bios

It's sad.
I don't care if it's effective it's still sad.




I feel the same about it

Except for hookup sites, that's just easy sex

:noargument:



the hookup sites and dating sites are the same ones how is it any different its not like you're forced to be with someone foreverafter a first date


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23570894 - 08/23/16 10:00 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:
Quote:

morrowasted said:
They want a man who can take care of them, and their potential offspring.




You just did a sexism..  :sad:



No, that is a fact. Women follow their biological imperative to seek security. Before money, women sought men who could physically provide security for their family. I don't hate them for it, I understand. I'm just stating what the facts are.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 2
    #23570900 - 08/23/16 10:01 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

morrowasted said:
Quote:

you're never gonna pull someone in with that dating profile no matter how sad you are dude wtf :haha:



Like I said it's not really about pulling anyone in. I haven't actually met someone through a dating website since I was 19- in 7 years. It's about making a statement. If people read it and understand it and it makes them think, that is a better use of my profile than what it was before



hahahaha yea there's gonna be a lot of girls having life-changing revelations from some cranky dating profile they browse on the internet ur gonna start a revolution


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570903 - 08/23/16 10:01 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

lmao I just got a message! It's working already:

Quote:

How can u be on the web trying to find someone and be so negative...such a disgusting profile...brrrrrrrr sh$t




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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570904 - 08/23/16 10:01 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I've never tried dating sites, I've never even thought about it. I've liked bein single for a while, it was only recently that I thought about tryin to meet a good girl I could stick with for a while. I wouldn't even know how to start making a good profile though, making a list seems so weird to me..I'm much better at back at just having conversations in person.

OP I get the feelin the same girls that would respond to that profile are the same kinda girls that would be on the shroomery. Not saying that as a bad thing, just a feelin I get.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570908 - 08/23/16 10:02 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)


Quote:

morrowasted said:
lmao I just got a message! It's working already:

Quote:

How can u be on the web trying to find someone and be so negative...such a disgusting profile...brrrrrrrr sh$t







I sent that message...


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 2
    #23570914 - 08/23/16 10:03 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

That was sheekles female puppet
He uses it so he can have conversations w himself on plenty of fish and beat off to them in a narcissistic act of hormonal overload.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 3
    #23570921 - 08/23/16 10:04 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

>>Through my dealings with the fairer sex

LOL

>>1) I am not your father. I will not tolerate childish bullsh*twhen you don’t get your way and I will not throw money at you to shut you up.

LOL

>>I realize you’re probably every bit as bitter with men as I am with you r**** compatriots

LOL ???


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570927 - 08/23/16 10:05 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

my reply:

It's not negative. It's called not putting up a front, which is what 99% of PoF users do. The male peacocks spread their feathers in an effort to attract the female peacocks. I'd rather wait for the right woman than waste valuable time, effort, and resources putting up and gradually tearing down a front for the wrong woman.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: ModestMouse]
    #23570929 - 08/23/16 10:06 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

yeah then i fill the jizz into paintballs and shoot them at people who brag about stabbing the blind with broken glass bottles


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23570936 - 08/23/16 10:07 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Celestial Traveler said:

Quote:

morrowasted said:
lmao I just got a message! It's working already:

Quote:

How can u be on the web trying to find someone and be so negative...such a disgusting profile...brrrrrrrr sh$t







I sent that message...


lol wtf is with you guys actually looking me up on pof that's creepy


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570937 - 08/23/16 10:07 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
Quote:

Repertoire89 said:


I feel the same about it

Except for hookup sites, that's just easy sex

:noargument:



the hookup sites and dating sites are the same ones how is it any different its not like you're forced to be with someone foreverafter a first date




Some sites are more explicitly about sex, so there's less hassle overall

Dating sites are a bore, lots of dead end conversations and flakes, long-winded vain essays about boring people

I like your profile though, so many sexy


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: 404]
    #23570941 - 08/23/16 10:08 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

404 said:
>>Through my dealings with the fairer sex

LOL

>>1) I am not your father. I will not tolerate childish bullsh*twhen you don’t get your way and I will not throw money at you to shut you up.

LOL

>>I realize you’re probably every bit as bitter with men as I am with you r**** compatriots

LOL ???



pof bleeps out the work cunty


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570945 - 08/23/16 10:09 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Did you even get any dates out of that profile sheekle?


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Eminence]
    #23570954 - 08/23/16 10:10 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

nah not on pof but ive gotten dates on okcupid with an equally wild profile i'm too lazy to look up


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570955 - 08/23/16 10:11 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

morrowasted said:
Quote:

Patchouli_Savage said:
Wait...You stole this? As in you couldn't even find your own way to say "I'm a jaded judgmental asshole. Do not respond to this if you are needy or fat. I don't have any money for any of you bitches so don't fucking ask. Be interesting and entertaining for my grumpy ass to be around. Drop a line. Or don't. Or whatever."

Lame.

Edit: meant To reply to OP and not Celestial Traveler



It honestly never occurred to me to take this approach. I just stumbled across this and thought it was great, so yes, I stole it. Sue me.


)


Nah...It doesn't sound like I would get any money out of that lawsuit. Besides, I would hate to leave you feeling like we are all just a bunch of money grubbing bitches...


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Patchouli_Savage] * 1
    #23570960 - 08/23/16 10:13 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Plenty of fish sounds like the last place I'd like to shop for puss at


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570961 - 08/23/16 10:13 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

morrowasted said:
I stole this cuz it was just too rich to pass up. Will it work? Doubt it.

Through my dealings with the fairer sex over the previous 25 years I have become completely disillusioned with females (all people really, but I’m not trying to date guys) and have now resorted to the internet in an effort to find one that I can at least tolerate for extended periods of time.You want to know about me? I’ll tell you what I’m not.

1) I am not your father. I will not tolerate childish bullsh*twhen you don’t get your way and I will not throw money at you to shut you up.

2) I am not your hobby. That’s why you have friends. This road goes both ways though, and you’re not expected to join me on any trips you don’t want to. I’ve got friends for that too.

Here’s where we get to you. As a staunch rationalist, I realize you’re probably every bit as bitter with men as I am with you r**** compatriots, possibly having almost given up on us. My (admittedly weak) theory is you have not yet lost all hope but have simply turned to a less social lifestyle and are casually perusing the PoF personals just waiting for my ad to pop up so we can end our days in perpetual bliss or whatever storybook fantasy those cookie cutter girls get off on.

I am not an extremely picky guy. Being my dream girl is more a matter of the things you aren’t than the things you are.

My ideal woman:
-when asked about her hobbies, has more to say than, “Like, you know, stuff,” or the always popular “shopping, hanging out, music, friends.”
-can think outside her own head and understand that while her wants and needs are her priority (and there’s nothing wrong with that), those around her have their own desires.
-takes care of herself to some degree. We can’t help certain aspects of our appearance, but if you don’t bathe regularly and have eaten yourself fat it demonstrates a fatal lack of respect for yourself that one would expect to bleed into other aspects of your behavior.

If you’ve read this much crap and are actually interested, we might just stand a chance. Send me a message that makes me think, laugh, or hope.




This comes off as really salty and aggressive. You also dont tell them about yourself at all.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: ModestMouse]
    #23570965 - 08/23/16 10:14 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

no1 gives a kok creampuppy


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Eminence]
    #23570969 - 08/23/16 10:15 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Just posted this to CL personals as well

let the magic begin


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570974 - 08/23/16 10:16 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

oh bro tou're gonna score so hard on craigslist bro maybe if u try hard enough u can give ur credit card to a fake bot


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570975 - 08/23/16 10:17 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

the only thing craigslist is good for is gettin jerked off thru glory holes by old men


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: BANANA.MAN]
    #23570979 - 08/23/16 10:17 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

BANANA.MAN said:
Quote:

morrowasted said:
I stole this cuz it was just too rich to pass up. Will it work? Doubt it.

Through my dealings with the fairer sex over the previous 25 years I have become completely disillusioned with females (all people really, but I’m not trying to date guys) and have now resorted to the internet in an effort to find one that I can at least tolerate for extended periods of time.You want to know about me? I’ll tell you what I’m not.

1) I am not your father. I will not tolerate childish bullsh*twhen you don’t get your way and I will not throw money at you to shut you up.

2) I am not your hobby. That’s why you have friends. This road goes both ways though, and you’re not expected to join me on any trips you don’t want to. I’ve got friends for that too.

Here’s where we get to you. As a staunch rationalist, I realize you’re probably every bit as bitter with men as I am with you r**** compatriots, possibly having almost given up on us. My (admittedly weak) theory is you have not yet lost all hope but have simply turned to a less social lifestyle and are casually perusing the PoF personals just waiting for my ad to pop up so we can end our days in perpetual bliss or whatever storybook fantasy those cookie cutter girls get off on.

I am not an extremely picky guy. Being my dream girl is more a matter of the things you aren’t than the things you are.

My ideal woman:
-when asked about her hobbies, has more to say than, “Like, you know, stuff,” or the always popular “shopping, hanging out, music, friends.”
-can think outside her own head and understand that while her wants and needs are her priority (and there’s nothing wrong with that), those around her have their own desires.
-takes care of herself to some degree. We can’t help certain aspects of our appearance, but if you don’t bathe regularly and have eaten yourself fat it demonstrates a fatal lack of respect for yourself that one would expect to bleed into other aspects of your behavior.

If you’ve read this much crap and are actually interested, we might just stand a chance. Send me a message that makes me think, laugh, or hope.




This comes off as really salty and aggressive. You also dont tell them about yourself at all.



It reveals plenty about me by way of inference. It reveals that I am honest and forthright, intelligent, not codependent. Specific things like hobbies are not important. Most people talk about a bunch of bullshit that doesn't matter in their profile. I want to know what KIND of person you are, not what sort of stuff you fill your day with.


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InvisibleModestMouse
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570982 - 08/23/16 10:18 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Never make the same mistake twice right sheeks?


--------------------
Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570983 - 08/23/16 10:18 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
the only thing craigslist is good for is gettin jerked off thru glory holes by old men



i dunno man some other people in the thread where this originated were claiming the OP worked for them on CL. maybe they were full of shit


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570986 - 08/23/16 10:19 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

hhaaha the most recent date i went on from okcupid a while back i told her about the time i got jerked off thru a glory hole from craigslist n the next day i asked her out n it worked out she was hot too, i guess girls like hearing about guys gettin jerked off thru glory holes i should use it as a pickup line more often


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23570991 - 08/23/16 10:20 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

morrowasted said:
Quote:

Sheekle said:
the only thing craigslist is good for is gettin jerked off thru glory holes by old men



i dunno man some other people in the thread where this originated were claiming the OP worked for them on CL. maybe they were full of shit



yeah maybe if the thread was from 2010 or some shit when people actually used craigslist

no modest i never gave my credit card info away, if i ever did i would give it to a blind person an let them feel the numbers to see if they could memorize it to steal it


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570994 - 08/23/16 10:21 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

wow dude i would use that if I wasn't against fronting. maybe I should find a glory hole


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23570995 - 08/23/16 10:21 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
Quote:

morrowasted said:
Quote:

Sheekle said:
the only thing craigslist is good for is gettin jerked off thru glory holes by old men



i dunno man some other people in the thread where this originated were claiming the OP worked for them on CL. maybe they were full of shit



yeah maybe if the thread was from 2010 or some shit when people actually used craigslist

no modest i never gave my credit card info away, if i ever did i would give it to a blind person an let them feel the numbers to see if they could memorize it to steal it




You're on a roll today  :lolsy:


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OfflineBANANA.MAN
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23571000 - 08/23/16 10:22 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

morrowasted said:
Quote:

BANANA.MAN said:
Quote:

morrowasted said:
I stole this cuz it was just too rich to pass up. Will it work? Doubt it.

Through my dealings with the fairer sex over the previous 25 years I have become completely disillusioned with females (all people really, but I’m not trying to date guys) and have now resorted to the internet in an effort to find one that I can at least tolerate for extended periods of time.You want to know about me? I’ll tell you what I’m not.

1) I am not your father. I will not tolerate childish bullsh*twhen you don’t get your way and I will not throw money at you to shut you up.

2) I am not your hobby. That’s why you have friends. This road goes both ways though, and you’re not expected to join me on any trips you don’t want to. I’ve got friends for that too.

Here’s where we get to you. As a staunch rationalist, I realize you’re probably every bit as bitter with men as I am with you r**** compatriots, possibly having almost given up on us. My (admittedly weak) theory is you have not yet lost all hope but have simply turned to a less social lifestyle and are casually perusing the PoF personals just waiting for my ad to pop up so we can end our days in perpetual bliss or whatever storybook fantasy those cookie cutter girls get off on.

I am not an extremely picky guy. Being my dream girl is more a matter of the things you aren’t than the things you are.

My ideal woman:
-when asked about her hobbies, has more to say than, “Like, you know, stuff,” or the always popular “shopping, hanging out, music, friends.”
-can think outside her own head and understand that while her wants and needs are her priority (and there’s nothing wrong with that), those around her have their own desires.
-takes care of herself to some degree. We can’t help certain aspects of our appearance, but if you don’t bathe regularly and have eaten yourself fat it demonstrates a fatal lack of respect for yourself that one would expect to bleed into other aspects of your behavior.

If you’ve read this much crap and are actually interested, we might just stand a chance. Send me a message that makes me think, laugh, or hope.




This comes off as really salty and aggressive. You also dont tell them about yourself at all.



It reveals plenty about me by way of inference. It reveals that I am honest and forthright, intelligent, not codependent. Specific things like hobbies are not important. Most people talk about a bunch of bullshit that doesn't matter in their profile. I want to know what KIND of person you are, not what sort of stuff you fill your day with.



Im not trying to be a smart ass but you just said that you want a girl who can tell you what her hobbies are and you wont except certain answers.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23571007 - 08/23/16 10:23 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

yeah it was from 2009


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: BANANA.MAN]
    #23571018 - 08/23/16 10:25 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

BANANA.MAN said:
Quote:

morrowasted said:
Quote:

BANANA.MAN said:
Quote:

morrowasted said:
I stole this cuz it was just too rich to pass up. Will it work? Doubt it.

Through my dealings with the fairer sex over the previous 25 years I have become completely disillusioned with females (all people really, but I’m not trying to date guys) and have now resorted to the internet in an effort to find one that I can at least tolerate for extended periods of time.You want to know about me? I’ll tell you what I’m not.

1) I am not your father. I will not tolerate childish bullsh*twhen you don’t get your way and I will not throw money at you to shut you up.

2) I am not your hobby. That’s why you have friends. This road goes both ways though, and you’re not expected to join me on any trips you don’t want to. I’ve got friends for that too.

Here’s where we get to you. As a staunch rationalist, I realize you’re probably every bit as bitter with men as I am with you r**** compatriots, possibly having almost given up on us. My (admittedly weak) theory is you have not yet lost all hope but have simply turned to a less social lifestyle and are casually perusing the PoF personals just waiting for my ad to pop up so we can end our days in perpetual bliss or whatever storybook fantasy those cookie cutter girls get off on.

I am not an extremely picky guy. Being my dream girl is more a matter of the things you aren’t than the things you are.

My ideal woman:
-when asked about her hobbies, has more to say than, “Like, you know, stuff,” or the always popular “shopping, hanging out, music, friends.”
-can think outside her own head and understand that while her wants and needs are her priority (and there’s nothing wrong with that), those around her have their own desires.
-takes care of herself to some degree. We can’t help certain aspects of our appearance, but if you don’t bathe regularly and have eaten yourself fat it demonstrates a fatal lack of respect for yourself that one would expect to bleed into other aspects of your behavior.

If you’ve read this much crap and are actually interested, we might just stand a chance. Send me a message that makes me think, laugh, or hope.




This comes off as really salty and aggressive. You also dont tell them about yourself at all.



It reveals plenty about me by way of inference. It reveals that I am honest and forthright, intelligent, not codependent. Specific things like hobbies are not important. Most people talk about a bunch of bullshit that doesn't matter in their profile. I want to know what KIND of person you are, not what sort of stuff you fill your day with.



Im not trying to be a smart ass but you just said that you want a girl who can tell you what her hobbies are and you wont except certain answers.


I don't mean to sound like a smart ass but it says "WHEN ASKED"

But you make a decent point. I'll add some stuff in at the end about myself


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 1
    #23571020 - 08/23/16 10:25 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

What? Hobbies can definitely be a good thing to list, couples who share hobbies have an easier time staying together than people who don't, and hobbies can sometimes also be an indicator of what kind of person someone is too.


--------------------




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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Eminence]
    #23571062 - 08/23/16 10:40 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Eminence said:
What? Hobbies can definitely be a good thing to list, couples who share hobbies have an easier time staying together than people who don't, and hobbies can sometimes also be an indicator of what kind of person someone is too.



Quote:

A little bit about me: Despite the way my profile is about to seem, I'm a pretty sentimental guy. I'm generally optimistic and not jaded, though I am often cynical with my sense of humor. I read, and talk about things that people say you're not supposed to talk about, like politics and religion. Politically I am a centrist. I don't play videogames, when I try I feel like I'm wasting my life, but I don't mind if you do, as long as they don't consume yours. I don't smoke weed or drink, but I don't mind if you do, and I do take certain mind-altering substances on occasion (no, not any hard drugs, message me for further info).


I don't have a whole lot of hobbies. I pretty much just read and get online and debate about shit and work out and go to work. I guess I need to develop at least one more. I know women are more attracted to guys who have more hobbies.


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23571068 - 08/23/16 10:40 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

wtf u only wanna hear about girs hobbies if explicitely asked an shit


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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InvisibleModestMouse
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23571073 - 08/23/16 10:42 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Threads a shitheap and the only good to come out of it was us telling you your bio sucks and some wise cracks from the peanut gallery.

You'd be smart to take up a real hobby and go outside and socialize and meet real women, get the fuck off plenty of fish it's for aging white men.


--------------------
Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: ModestMouse]
    #23571077 - 08/23/16 10:43 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

haha "some wise cracks from the peanut gallery"


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 3
    #23571084 - 08/23/16 10:45 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

yea morrow u should give some hot babe some 1P-LSD and once dhe starts tripping tell her how much u hate girls an how annoying she is an how ungrateful she is for not thanking u to help steer her mind towards enlightenment so she can become intelligent


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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InvisibleEminence
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23571174 - 08/23/16 11:16 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

In partial defense to that joke, I have never met a girl who wasn't annoying as hell to trip with :lol:


--------------------




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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23571198 - 08/23/16 11:22 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Met my chick on POF surprisingly like 8 yrs ago or something
My profile was a complete joke. I put something like I'm a fucking ninja and favorite hobbies deep sea shark hunting and massive bong loads or some such.
Don't take life toooooo seriously or you'll have a fking brain hernia
And chicks hate depressing cynical MFers


--------------------


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Shroomism]
    #23571208 - 08/23/16 11:25 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

my dating profile:


male, mid 20's

I have the rarest of pepe's for trade. :whatyougonnado:


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Shroomism]
    #23571213 - 08/23/16 11:27 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
wtf u only wanna hear about girs hobbies if explicitely asked an shit



Quote:

Shroomism said:
Met my chick on POF surprisingly like 8 yrs ago or something
My profile was a complete joke. I put something like I'm a fucking ninja and favorite hobbies deep sea shark hunting and massive bong loads or some such.
Don't take life toooooo seriously or you'll have a fking brain hernia
And chicks hate depressing cynical MFers



That's fine, I hate bubbly bitches


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23571218 - 08/23/16 11:27 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
yea morrow u should give some hot babe some 1P-LSD and once dhe starts tripping tell her how much u hate girls an how annoying she is an how ungrateful she is for not thanking u to help steer her mind towards enlightenment so she can become intelligent



That sounds like fun


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23571535 - 08/24/16 01:39 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

awfuck. Always told myself i didnt like asain, now this app has me talking to one. Fuck it. I hope we get the chance to meet


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Ogla]
    #23571549 - 08/24/16 01:44 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

are you guys fucking with me?


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Ogla]
    #23571656 - 08/24/16 02:59 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

already got my first CL response!
Quote:


Down to get sucked discreetly by a young guy?




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Invisible404
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23571704 - 08/24/16 03:29 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

:haha:


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: 404]
    #23571733 - 08/24/16 03:50 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

That was a total waste of time. It was a fake account. I did a reverse image search and found the real person. Had a fake Facebook and everything.  I totally just got turned off of this. It was some guy trying to make money


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: 404]
    #23571740 - 08/24/16 03:53 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

have never, and can almost certainly say i wont ever use a dating site.

reason: not out of being a snob or thinking they're lame.. persayyy...

but from my perspective based on the ppl i know who use/have used them, ive concluded the following to be true: its a very vast majority of the same "type" of people (all actively seeking relationships, or fuck-buddys, whatever it may be)....
that being said, ive never found that "actively-seeking-out" type of personality trait to be sexy or necessarily positive... honestly, at all.

My personality requires that there be no preconceived notions / expectations of anything relationship-y or whatever, upon meeting a person... i know ppl talk on these sites obviosly before meeting up in person on their date or motel room escapade, versus the completely "blind date" situation for example...
But it still stresses me out and rubs me the wrong way.  Idk.

I can only deal/fathom wanting to pursue someone after having had an organic, natural, and face to face interaction with them. I need to be able to read their body language off the bat, the things they arent saying to me vocally... their vibe, etc.

thats just me, though. and to each his own.  :sexeh:


--------------------


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23572104 - 08/24/16 07:54 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

morrowasted said:
Quote:

Sheekle said:
wtf u only wanna hear about girs hobbies if explicitely asked an shit



Quote:

Shroomism said:
Met my chick on POF surprisingly like 8 yrs ago or something
My profile was a complete joke. I put something like I'm a fucking ninja and favorite hobbies deep sea shark hunting and massive bong loads or some such.
Don't take life toooooo seriously or you'll have a fking brain hernia
And chicks hate depressing cynical MFers



That's fine, I hate bubbly bitches



oh bro so do i bro dont get me wrong bro. so does everyone really it's a huge secret that everybody who is intelligent is in on. theres nothing intelligent people hate more than when girls are happy bro no bullshit, fuckin hate bubbly happy cunts. what kind of piece of shit cunt thinks its ok to smile and be passionate about life? an unintelligent and needy piece of shit that's who. me and u have a lot in common morrow we're both real intelligent man we see through the charade bro, fuckin hate happy girls, shit's so dumb.


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Invisiblesomething super extreme
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle] * 1
    #23572112 - 08/24/16 07:57 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

haha morrowasted still pretends he's an intellectual in the internet


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted] * 8
    #23572159 - 08/24/16 08:17 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

OP - You come off as a major douche and extremely snobby. I could not see how anyone would want to chat you up to know you, unless they were even more abrasive as you were.

I would honestly be scared to even share anything about myself lest I get judged by you.

You gotta work on that profile man. The humor is definitely not coming through. And next time make your own and just state you have a dark humor.




I would totally answer Sheekle's if I ever got in an online dating thing. Our first date would consist of my actually putting him in a suitcase. I didn't answer for no shit talker.


--------------------


:heartpump::heartpump: :heartpump::heartpump:


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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: pachoo] * 2
    #23572160 - 08/24/16 08:18 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

i dated sheekle and let me tell you, when he says 9" he's being modest.
I'm still having trouble walking


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InvisibleFletcher
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23572296 - 08/24/16 09:31 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

morrowasted said:
already got my first CL response!
Quote:


Down to get sucked discreetly by a young guy?







Did you go for it?


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InvisibleRepertoire89
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Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: morrowasted]
    #23572420 - 08/24/16 10:26 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Yeah that OP profile just makes you look bitter
If you're frustrated with the online thing, take a break from it


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Offlinehex_enduction
satta massa gana
Male User Gallery


Registered: 01/26/14
Posts: 12,051
Last seen: 2 years, 8 months
Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Repertoire89]
    #23595600 - 08/30/16 09:37 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Thread was hilarious :loldongs:

Morrow, you come off as a complete douche. I understand where you're coming from using a profile like that but it's almost definitely not gonna work how you thought it might.

Did ANYONE end up hitting you back? I'd be very surprised.

Anyway, I don't have room to say shit, I can't make dating profiles for shit, nor do I really care to, but this ones just awful IMO.


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Connoisseur said:
oh ive cried on drugs

sunshine said:
Tragic.  I told the cop not to do it but he didn't listen.


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InvisiblepachooDiscord
Witchakookoo
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 09/10/10
Posts: 7,135
Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: hex_enduction] * 1
    #23595687 - 08/30/16 10:02 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

He's got a date with a cute yoga instructor from it I believe.

Pretty shocked it worked honestly but heyyy, good for him.

:thumbup:


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:heartpump::heartpump: :heartpump::heartpump:


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Invisibletrekie
Metal man
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Registered: 05/11/09
Posts: 11,085
Loc: Larger cities
Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: pachoo] * 3
    #23598368 - 08/31/16 05:51 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)



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InvisibleCelestial Traveler
Random Observer
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Registered: 03/03/11
Posts: 7,639
Loc: Idaho
Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: trekie]
    #23598590 - 08/31/16 06:53 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

French of course.  :smilingpuppy:


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Funny Video              Pokemon But With Animals Instead              B


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InvisibleSheekle
FREE BURKE
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Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Celestial Traveler]
    #23598828 - 08/31/16 07:57 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

the "cute yoga instructor" is probably a feminazi serial killer who's gonna murder morrow


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"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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InvisiblezZZz
jesus
I'm a teapot User Gallery

Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 33,478
Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: Sheekle]
    #23598910 - 08/31/16 08:18 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

under the "You should message me if" option I'll usually have something like " if u are not type to cut my dick off while I'm sleeping"


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https://discord.gg/NHHd5y2Uyv


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InvisibleFletcher
Male

Registered: 06/14/15
Posts: 679
Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: trekie]
    #23598965 - 08/31/16 08:29 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

trekie said:





That's a perfect profile for Camus. Did you make that?


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InvisibleModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE
 User Gallery

Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: trekie]
    #23598974 - 08/31/16 08:32 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

trekie said:




Looks like


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Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?


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Invisibletrekie
Metal man
Male User Gallery

Registered: 05/11/09
Posts: 11,085
Loc: Larger cities
Re: Share your dating profiles with us [Re: ModestMouse]
    #23599131 - 08/31/16 09:23 PM (7 years, 4 months ago)

I did not. I'm part of some really dark facebook groups.it was prefect for this situation.:deathrush:


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