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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: Moonshoe] 4
#23554179 - 08/18/16 05:40 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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these are the exact kinds of essays i was talking about.
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Sheekle
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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: 404] 2
#23554200 - 08/18/16 05:44 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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you threaten to leave WCA all the time moonshoe don't kid yourself
-------------------- "Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods "I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago "you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard "The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist "Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft "or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16
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Sophistic Radiance
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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: 404] 3
#23554207 - 08/18/16 05:45 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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AFAIK "meltdown" in the context of this thread refers to a type of self-inflicted public humiliation in the form of an uncontrolled emotional reaction to deliberate provocations by multiple antagonists through social media. It's what trolls hope to get out of trolling. Perhaps not coincidentally, it's also what bullies hope to get out of bullying.
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404
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Nicely put
These are the kinds of instances I had in mind in the OP as you either learn to deal with people and not let things effect you as much, or you don't and you spiral down. They are simply opportunities for self-reflection and personal growth. As some have pointed out, not everyone makes use of them. Some even deny that anything is wrong at all. The concept however, can be broadened to encompass other aspects of life outside of internet forums.
Be it Troll or bully, both are negative forces that aim to strip you of sensitivities that you may not really need or want in dealing with life. Life is life, often hard to deal with, but you can't get better at dealing with it unless you learn to let go of things and feelings that hold you back.
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Sophistic Radiance
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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: 404]
#23554255 - 08/18/16 05:58 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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I see the wisdom in it; I've had some pretty epic meltdowns on this forum, and I would agree that they were learning opportunities. I'm a much chiller poster around here these days because I learned to keep certain opinions to myself where it doesn't behoove me to express them. As a result, I've been able to get along with the folks around here much better and enjoy my time here a lot more, as well as to keep a more evenhanded perspective about differences of opinion and to forgive those who offend me. Perhaps even learned to express my opinions more effectively and persuasively.
I also went through a ton of grief because of those meltdowns, drank heavily to cope with the feelings they brought out of me, lost sleep, went through a mild depressive episode and a great deal of unnecessary anxiety, and felt compelled to distance myself for a time from a community I love.
I benefit from a strong foundation of stability and emotional support in my life. If I didn't have those benefits, those experiences might have taken a much heavier toll on me.
So I agree that meltdowns can be an opportunity for learning and constructive growth, but I think they also have a dark side where they can also be quite destructive and harmful to people who are vulnerable in terms of their life circumstances and/or individual psychology.
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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404
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I can agree there, sure. However, is it not you who decides what to feel about things? You can chose to react self-destructively in response to internet drama, or you can let it slide off your back. this may not apply to other more serious things that threaten your well-being... but drinking because of what someone said about you on a social media platform seems kind of counter-intuitive to one's own well-being
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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: 404]
#23554277 - 08/18/16 06:05 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Every time it happens, I end up a little more broken, but something carries me along.
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Sophistic Radiance
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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: 404]
#23554290 - 08/18/16 06:10 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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The type of emotional reserve you describe is unreliable... nobody sits there and makes a choice between "go into hysterics on my favorite message board and embarrass the shit out of myself while alienating my friends and community" and "let it slide off my back". The point of an uncontrolled emotional reaction is that it is uncontrolled, just as the heat generated by the core of a nuclear reactor is uncontrolled in a literal meltdown scenario. The melter doesn't have a choice in the matter. A sympathetic perspective would argue that it's not even the melter's responsibility to withstand the deliberate sabotage of their emotional coping mechanisms.
Again, I agree that it's an experience with the potential to build strength and character. But what builds strength and character for one person, could very well kill another. In some cases it's like expecting a doddering granny to be able to hold her own in a boxing match against Mike Tyson. Most would consider such a match unconscionable, but those of a cruel and sadistic temperament would relish the spectacle and take bets on what bone will be destroyed first, how long she will survive, and so on.
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
Edited by Sophistic Radiance (08/18/16 06:19 PM)
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404
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>>no one chooses to control an uncontrolled reaction
what? ok, so the other day when I had a meltdown at the gas station and pulled out a breaker bar from my back seat instead of letting the driver just go and not going to look for them for further conflict after - that was just all an uncontrolled reaction and I can chalk it up to the other guy's fault?
Your logic is really faulty here. these are two different situations, but the premise is still the same. instead of taking a step back and looking at the situation reasonably with indifference and self-control, we both chose to ignore any self-restraint and escalate the situation. you cannot blame others for your actions.
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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: 404] 1
#23554322 - 08/18/16 06:20 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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i took a dank soft serve shit that melted down the sides of the bowl.
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nooneman


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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: 404] 1
#23554324 - 08/18/16 06:21 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Well, you can't control feeling an emotion. The only thing you can control is what you do after you feel that emotion. Anyone pushed far enough will have an emotional crisis, what people do afterwards is controllable, but feeling the emotions themselves is uncontrollable. I'd love to be able to just flat out control my emotions all the time though. So I think it is both: self restraint when experiencing uncontrollable emotions.
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404
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OMG THEY LET YOU BACK IN THE PUBE?
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nooneman


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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: 404] 1
#23554332 - 08/18/16 06:23 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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404
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Quote:
nooneman said: Well, you can't control feeling an emotion. The only thing you can control is what you do after you feel that emotion. Anyone pushed far enough will have an emotional crisis, what people do afterwards is controllable, but feeling the emotions themselves is uncontrollable. I'd love to be able to just flat out control my emotions all the time though. So I think it is both: self restraint when experiencing uncontrollable emotions.
I never said otherwise, we are on the same page if you read back both my response and what i was responding to
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something super extreme
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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: 404]
#23554337 - 08/18/16 06:25 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
404 said: OMG THEY LET YOU BACK IN THE PUBE?

Yeah I have no idea, I went to get a link to a thread in here about Acidic_Sloth and it let me through.

I figure it's a fluke but ehehehehehe.
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Sophistic Radiance
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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: 404]
#23554341 - 08/18/16 06:26 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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That's not even remotely analogous to what goes on in a forum meltdown scenario. Did the driver spend days, weeks or months deliberately antagonizing you with the help of his friends? No. He was just some idiot who made some dumb move that set off your anger issues. If you hadn't controlled your violent impulses, an innocent person would have suffered. When emotional restraint fails in the case of a forum melt, the only one who suffers is the one who has been targeted with systematic antagonism over a prolonged period of time.
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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nooneman


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Re: Meltdowns. [Re: 404]
#23554340 - 08/18/16 06:26 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
404 said:
Quote:
nooneman said: Well, you can't control feeling an emotion. The only thing you can control is what you do after you feel that emotion. Anyone pushed far enough will have an emotional crisis, what people do afterwards is controllable, but feeling the emotions themselves is uncontrollable. I'd love to be able to just flat out control my emotions all the time though. So I think it is both: self restraint when experiencing uncontrollable emotions.
I never said otherwise, we are on the same page if you read back both my response and what i was responding to
Oh okay, I probably just got confused sorry
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Sophistic Radiance
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Quote:
something super extreme said: i took a dank soft serve shit that melted down the sides of the bowl.
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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something super extreme
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thas rite
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404
error


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Quote:
Sophistic Radiance said: That's not even remotely analogous to what goes on in a forum meltdown scenario. Did the driver spend days, weeks or months deliberately antagonizing you with the help of his friends? No. He was just some idiot who made some dumb move that set off your anger issues. If you hadn't controlled your violent impulses, an innocent person would have suffered. When emotional restraint fails in the case of a forum melt, the only one who suffers is the one who has been targeted with systematic antagonism over a prolonged period of time.
Logic still fails you. Does it matter if it was just one person? there are millions of idiots on the road, and i deal with several a day, which is kind of like having people antagonize me on the road daily. I deal with tailgaters DAILY. that sort of behavior drives me up the wall, but instead of reacting to it it, i let it go for the most part, or otherwise defuse the danger best i can.
If you had controlled your outbursts, people wouldn't have continued to fuck with you. You both acknowledge the objective of the trolling (to get a rise) and yet refuse to acknowledge it at the same time. You cannot blame others for your actions and reactions. it's all on you.
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