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Rhizohunter
myco-nerd



Registered: 04/22/11
Posts: 7,894
Last seen: 5 years, 3 months
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Here is a part of my book
#23528321 - 08/10/16 01:59 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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At Olean general I had the same delusion that they were trying to kill me. I tried to jump out the window and fall on my head but the windows were locked. I believe all the nurses are conspiring against me and want to kill me. I believe that they are giving me poison. I go out and ask for aspirin and I know that they are giving me cyanide. I believed that I was sacrificing myself for the greater good because I am too powerful of a being to live in this world with other mortals. I am doing a lot of strange things at this hospital. They keep having me pee in a cup and the voices tell me to drop the cup in the toilet. I do this three times and they never get that urine sample. I started to believe I had my super powers again and that I could see in the dark. I went into the bathroom and shut the lights off and only went by where I believed the objects to be. I probably pissed on the floor instead of the toilet because you really can't aim when you are in a dark room. I start to follow this girl around and it is as if I am a nuisance to her. The voices would tell me to do all sorts of things like dropping a book behind her when she was on the telephone to scare her. I would follow her around and believe that she was important. The voices would tell me to look up from my book and every time I did it, there she would be. It is like this constantly with the voices, they know things that they should not know. I am using the books as a form of telepathy and I have decided not to talk. I am believing that I am telepathic with everyone and that I don't need to say the words out loud, they should only be said in the mind. The nurse can't get a word out of me, but how is this possible when I am talking with her in my head so fluently? I am challenging the nurses who could sing and talk the fastest in the mind and I have them all beat. My mind is a racing machine and I am communicating with so many beings that I start to do some bizarre things. The voices had me spinning around and blurting out random words at the meetings I would go to. It was as if I was being tormented by the girls and this is one of the delusions that I don't think about much.
I just picked a random place in the book and copied and pasted. Hope you like it
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Burke Dennings
baby merchant

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 81,641
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Re: Here is a part of my book [Re: Rhizohunter] 1
#23528345 - 08/10/16 02:09 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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It reads like a list of symptoms/schizophrenic behaviors. Not the most compelling narrative, IMO. Still, stick with it. Writing can be good for you.
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Rhizohunter
myco-nerd



Registered: 04/22/11
Posts: 7,894
Last seen: 5 years, 3 months
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Quote:
Burke Dennings said: It reads like a list of symptoms/schizophrenic behaviors. Not the most compelling narrative, IMO. Still, stick with it. Writing can be good for you.
Thanks Burke, that is the answer I was looking for. I would like to speak with people who understand this frame of mind and show them that there are things that could help. I will try this again randomly...
am not a true fighter in the physical world, but I have my Cutco knives and I am ready at any given time to protect my apartment where I believe the lord lives as I possess the tree of knowledge and am constantly waiting for someone to arrive and take it from me. If the cops had showed up for any reason it would not have ended well. I am seeing all the possible outcomes in my mind of how this is going to go down and I have this delusion where if a cop were to shoot at me the gun would not fire. They would have to go head to head to me with my knives and it would end in a bloody mess. Good thing that nothing of this sort happened because in true reality it would just end with me getting shot. The police are always trigger happy as I am watching the news and hearing about all the abuse that the cops are putting on the American people for no reason and I have had many instances with the police that summer. In my mind, I see the police, and let me tell you the police enter my mind many times. They always say "this is the JPD, we're sorry for what we have done to you and we are going to leave you alone", but I never believe this to be true. The JPD like to fuck with me and there was a time where my uncle called the cops on me because I was acting a little "out there" in his house and I said I was walking to my Nana and Papas. The police arrived as I was walking there and I fit the description of who they were looking for, luckily I was as polite as I always was and said" no I am fine, I am not a threat to anyone, I am just walking to my grandparents house to say hello". The police this time seem to be chill and let me go on my way, but as I go to shake the police officers hand (as I always do) he says, "I'm not shaking your hand" and I start to believe this is because I have the ability to change the police officers mind and turn them into beings that now work for me.
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FreeTheSoul
The wonderer.
Registered: 01/04/14
Posts: 2,297
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
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Re: Here is a part of my book [Re: Rhizohunter]
#23528386 - 08/10/16 02:23 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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You live in NY eh? I go through Olean Ny sometimes. Or do you live in Jamestown?
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Bodhi of Ankou
*alternate opinion blocks path*


Registered: 06/02/09
Posts: 24,778
Loc: Soviet Canukistan
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Re: Here is a part of my book [Re: Rhizohunter] 1
#23528392 - 08/10/16 02:25 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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I think going back on the medication might be a good idea. This doesnt sound anything like the trippy shamanistic visions you've made them out to be. It sounds awful.
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Rhizohunter
myco-nerd



Registered: 04/22/11
Posts: 7,894
Last seen: 5 years, 3 months
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Re: Here is a part of my book [Re: FreeTheSoul]
#23528450 - 08/10/16 02:44 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
FreeTheSoul said: You live in NY eh? I go through Olean Ny sometimes. Or do you live in Jamestown?
Jamestown is Ny
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clock_of_omens
razzle them dazzle them


Registered: 04/10/14
Posts: 4,097
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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Re: Here is a part of my book [Re: Rhizohunter] 1
#23528462 - 08/10/16 02:49 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Looks to be boring and pointless ramblings with basically no art involved. Probably publishable.
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FreeTheSoul
The wonderer.
Registered: 01/04/14
Posts: 2,297
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
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lol I just realized what I said.
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5150
phantom

Registered: 09/01/06
Posts: 5,437
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: Here is a part of my book [Re: FreeTheSoul]
#23536436 - 08/12/16 10:27 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Read "a million little pieces"frey will give u pointers
-------------------- "the way of the warrior is the resolute acceptance of death" Miyamoto Musashi
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,066
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 2 hours, 18 minutes
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Re: Here is a part of my book [Re: 5150] 2
#23536444 - 08/12/16 10:29 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Paragraphs are your friends
--------------------
NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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Re: Here is a part of my book [Re: koods]
#23536546 - 08/12/16 11:07 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
koods said: Paragraphs are your friends
I fucking LOVE reading. But I run and hide behind the closest chair/adult/wall I can find when I see a wall of text looming aggressively at me.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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clock_of_omens
razzle them dazzle them


Registered: 04/10/14
Posts: 4,097
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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Both of those excerpts could easily be single paragraphs length-wise. However, even if he were so inclined, there are no natural places to break because they're barely coherent ramblings.
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Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
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If I wasn't enjoying the afterglow of my mescaline right now, I would so paragraph the fuck out of those barely coherent ramblings.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
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Seriously_trippin
Cosmic Guru Ganesh



Registered: 07/12/13
Posts: 14,473
Last seen: 3 hours, 59 minutes
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Quote:
Burke Dennings said: It reads like a list of symptoms/schizophrenic behaviors. Not the most compelling narrative, IMO. Still, stick with it. Writing can be good for you.
Work on the narrative a bit but I love it I've actually been looking forward to this
-------------------- R.I.P Zombi3, Blue Helix Modest Mouse Zappa Slothie That Kid With The face ShLong Le Canard split_by_nine & Big Worm Forever Etched in the sands of time in the shroomery and ever so beloved and deeply missed by many
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clock_of_omens
razzle them dazzle them


Registered: 04/10/14
Posts: 4,097
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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In order for one to work on the narrative, there would really need to be a narrative there in the first place.
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Seriously_trippin
Cosmic Guru Ganesh



Registered: 07/12/13
Posts: 14,473
Last seen: 3 hours, 59 minutes
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I find it fascinating and that's not true read brain on fire
-------------------- R.I.P Zombi3, Blue Helix Modest Mouse Zappa Slothie That Kid With The face ShLong Le Canard split_by_nine & Big Worm Forever Etched in the sands of time in the shroomery and ever so beloved and deeply missed by many
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clock_of_omens
razzle them dazzle them


Registered: 04/10/14
Posts: 4,097
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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How fascinating you may or may not find it has no real bearing on whether it is good writing or good as a piece of art.
I just read several pages of Brain on Fire on Amazon and the writing was banal and not good. Also, I don't know why you cited that in regards to this topic. What I read was not just nonsense ramblings and there was indeed a narrative, however lame.
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Seriously_trippin
Cosmic Guru Ganesh



Registered: 07/12/13
Posts: 14,473
Last seen: 3 hours, 59 minutes
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Yeah it kind of does if I like it everyone else could fuck off. At least one person likes it. I have done editing for Carl's junior commercial and King Kong and thIs could be a lot better with editing . me rhiz. I can articulate and form emotional paragraphs and more elegance depict option to it
-------------------- R.I.P Zombi3, Blue Helix Modest Mouse Zappa Slothie That Kid With The face ShLong Le Canard split_by_nine & Big Worm Forever Etched in the sands of time in the shroomery and ever so beloved and deeply missed by many
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clock_of_omens
razzle them dazzle them


Registered: 04/10/14
Posts: 4,097
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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No. Whether you like or dislike a work doesn't affect whether it is good or bad. One can like bad art and dislike good art yet still recognize whether it is good or bad apart from subjective biases. If all it takes for something to be good is that one person likes it, then every work is good, in which case nothing is actually good because 'good' becomes meaningless.
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Rhizohunter
myco-nerd



Registered: 04/22/11
Posts: 7,894
Last seen: 5 years, 3 months
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It is just a collection of thoughts and experiences which combine to create a story about a mind which is experiencing things which really shouldn't be a part of the world.
The mind can create some very interesting dialogues and your reality twists and turns with it. I enjoy how the mind acts upon physical observations, it is as if it has a role play with it to supply your reality with a new story.
That was just a random piece of my mind by the way, I just wrote this earlier.
The constant need to keep thinking is very prevalent within the community of the schizophrenics and in my opinion that should be reason enough to get social security. I don't think the modern man could ever understand what it is like to be constantly provoked by thought to the point where you can't do anything else in this world accept think. It is a force, worse than drug addiction, that causes you to need to leave society so that you can be involved with your own thoughts on a day to day basis. My idea about it is outside the ideas of the normal. For a person with this condition you would think that they need to try to adjust to society and learn to live without this constant need for satisfaction. I am fully addicted to my own brain and what it can do for me, I am constantly needing a satisfaction from my mind, a reward system which is given to me over and over again. The more I think, the higher I get, and there is no drug that can top it. I do enjoy to use drugs because they cause me to think about different parts of my mind, but it is not the high from the drug that I crave. I just want to be intrigued by my thoughts more and more from the drugs that I use. Once you have abandoned the ideas of drugs getting you high and accepted that you can take control of your own brain and get you higher, do you actually succeed in some form of development within your human consciousness.
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