Home | Community | Message Board


This site includes paid links. Please support our sponsors.


Welcome to the Shroomery Message Board! You are experiencing a small sample of what the site has to offer. Please login or register to post messages and view our exclusive members-only content. You'll gain access to additional forums, file attachments, board customizations, encrypted private messages, and much more!

Kraken Kratom Shop: Red Vein Kratom

Jump to first unread post Pages: 1 | 2 | 3 | Next >  [ show all ]
Anonymous #1

A good relationship
    #23526702 - 08/10/16 12:24 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Hello Shroomery,

I have an issue on my hands. I am in love with my gf we are both young she is 18 and about to start college and im a 21 year old high school drop out.

What we have is a deep kind of relationship she has been there with me threw the last two years of my life where everything has constantly been changing but she has always been by my side. She does love me and she is in love with me.

Well last week she went on a date with another guy she met a year before me while i was at work (we dont live together) and the next day they went to the park and he kissed her and kind of led this guy on into thinking they have something now.

I am very hurt with what happened because of my past relationships and i never thought this girl of all people would cheat on me. She is really not the type of girl to worry about this is really just out of the ordinary for her.

We are talking this threw i love her alot and i can not leave her but she does say she needs time to think about what she wants but she says and i believe her honestly that she doesnt like the guy and now feels bad for doing this to both of us.(me and the other guy)

I know girls who cheat alot of my exs were those types of girls. Never have they told me before it escalated and never have they genuinely apologized. she told me everything and i do believe her she is very honest with me. I can forgive her but i feel like it will be hard to regain full trust again. How do i not let that ruin our relationship i really want to be with this girl.

A little more information for a big situation:

She decided to have a break for a few days and it only lasted a little over 24 hours and she caved and texted me and told me everything and we talked all day and now i think i've won her back. I feel confident she doesnt like this guy this all happened with but she doesn't know if she wants to be in a relationship. All i can tell is we both cant picture not having one another in each others life. We have made real hope amd dreams together and we just get eachother. My last question is if this ever gets the response im looking for, Should i worry? I want to be with her but i cant be cheated on ever again. It wasnt big and she isnt a cheater like she seems like she was trying to see if that suits her and i dont think she likes what it did to her image and the situation she is in now.

Is it wrong to forgive a minor cheat at least once, especially if you believe it's true love?


Edited by Anonymous (08/28/16 09:57 AM)


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: Cheated [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #23526737 - 08/10/16 12:40 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I think you're too young to stick around after this, personally.

I know it's probably not what you want to hear, but you've probably already lost her. I would advise you not to in any way try and bargain this out with her. Just walk man. You'll preserve far more of her respect and of your self respect if you do.

Seriously man, at 21, you've got so many prospects ahead of you, and it's very rare for relationships to start at the ages yours did and make it in the long run.

Obviously, you gotta do what you gotta do, but that's my opinion.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #1

Re: Cheated [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #23526911 - 08/10/16 02:14 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

She isnt this type of girl i really dont think it would happen again it was just a 3 day thing and just a peck from a guy she now knows she doesnt like.

If i could leave maybe i would but i love her to much to leave her over this if it were just a little bit worse than it was i would hear you out and leave but shes a good woman at 18 she is focused on a career and future. She is my best friend seriously and this is because i have been neglecting her in the cliche way of being over worked and not having put my energy towards our relstionship.

I will see tomorrow if she wants to be with me or not and i hope we will be together is it really wrong to forgive her once i want a long lasting love and i feel like going through stuff like this is part of that.

Key things matter to me it was just a peck he initiated it she told me the nect day after she said we needed a break and after i calmed down a bit she told me everything.

I love her man i cant imagine life without her at all. She is all the hope i have left if she left me i would need alot of time to recover perhaps months she means that much to me


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: Cheated [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #23526937 - 08/10/16 02:32 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Oh hang on a min, I thought you said she fucked this dude? If not, please take back what I said.

I actually had the exact same situation happen to me (if it was just a kiss) when I was your age, with a girl (my first long term GF) who was her age. I still got a couple of happy years out of the relationship after that.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #1

Re: Cheated [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #23527000 - 08/10/16 03:08 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Thanks man i needed that.
Yeah she is a good girl i really dont think i ever have to worry about her fucking some guy like that she REALLY aint like that this girls got class and i think since she is young i saw something like this coming amd now that its over with and it wasnt that bad if we make it through i will have nothing to worry about from this point on if it happens again i know what ill have to do but i got tobtake the chance it wont even if we dont last forever i know there is something still there on both sides last week she was all upset about how little attention i gave her and even though she is asexual she eas coming on to me because i wasnt coming on to her lately.

She told me she just wants to be held and needs more physical affection so im gonna give her that and hope we make ot through.

Thank you again and its nice to see youre a romantic it seems


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: Cheated [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #23527029 - 08/10/16 03:21 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous said:
She told me she just wants to be held and needs more physical affection so im gonna give her that and hope we make ot through.

Thank you again and its nice to see youre a romantic it seems



Thanks man, I am indeed. Bit of a hopeless one sometimes.

In my case, it was a guy who she grew up with, as friends, so that made it a bit easier for me to handle.

But I reckon you got it figured man. It's a bit of a tightrope walk at times, knowing what is too little/too much physical affection for your woman. But I think this could potentially be a really good lesson/wake up call for you.

All the best brother.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleThayendanegea
quiet walker
Male User Gallery


Registered: 02/20/12
Posts: 7,596
Loc: 7 Lodges Nation Flag
Re: Cheated [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #23528191 - 08/10/16 01:06 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Is she starting college at a place away from where you live?


--------------------
Look Deep Into Nature,and Then You Will Understand Everything Better.

Albert Einstein


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisibledemiu5
humans, lol
 User Gallery

Registered: 08/18/05
Posts: 43,948
Loc: the popcorn stadium Flag
Re: Cheated [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #23528216 - 08/10/16 01:16 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

she's 18


she has no idea what she wants and won't for a while



you're 21.  you have no idea what you want and won't for a while


--------------------
channel your inner Larry David


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #1

Re: Cheated [Re: demiu5]
    #23528322 - 08/10/16 01:59 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Thayendanegea said:
Is she starting college at a place away from where you live?




She will be gping to college in a different city but i will be following behind her shortly.
Quote:

demiu5 said:
she's 18


she has no idea what she wants and won't for a while



you're 21.  you have no idea what you want and won't for a while




I know this but it doesnt mean we necessarily dont want eachother.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #1

Re: Cheated [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #23529146 - 08/10/16 06:30 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I dont know what to do i need help i know the options here but i want to perserve this relationship. How do i do this i need help asap


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: Cheated [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #23529160 - 08/10/16 06:34 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Don't try. Make your position clear and leave her to figure it out.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #1

Re: Cheated [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #23529241 - 08/10/16 06:58 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Thats what i am thinkibg tonight i think we are talking on the phone and im gonna just show her how i feel and tell her simply how i feel and what we can do and tell her if she needs space for awhile i can give it to her. I hopefully can make her miss me if i seemingly fall off the planet


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: Cheated [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #23529385 - 08/10/16 07:41 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Just don't wuss out here please brother. She fucked up and she's in the wrong here. Don't forget that.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleFruitOfLife
Professional Package Handler


Registered: 05/21/12
Posts: 4,832
Re: Cheated [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #23529394 - 08/10/16 07:44 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

:whathesaid:


--------------------


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #1

Re: Cheated [Re: FruitOfLife]
    #23529412 - 08/10/16 07:50 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Yeah i know she did wrong me but i have been wrong to her in the past and neglectful lately.

I am crying over this non stop since sunday i do not want to lose her woth every thing in me i want to make this work. I believe so strongly she is my soul mate and she is also my best friend i dont want to lose her i need her in my life.

I know she wronged me and ive let her know that enough at this point i want to try and show her tonight that we can move on together and things can be the way they were


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlinechevy66driver
Psychonaut
Male


Registered: 06/29/10
Posts: 161
Loc: Here and There
Last seen: 5 months, 15 days
Re: Cheated [Re: Anonymous #1] * 2
    #23529533 - 08/10/16 08:29 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I don't want to be Debbie downer, but she is probably not your soul mate. I have had this happen before. I hate to say it because I too am a romantic person.
Guard your heart, man. Women are fickle and now that they don't necessarily need men to live in this messed up world, their mind can change with their emotions, which are affected by the flutter of a butterfly's wing.

Would you have ever kissed another girl? It doesn't seem like you would. I wouldn't either, but women have left me, cheated on me, and left me out in the cold with not a second thought to my well being.

This is a warning sign, brother. If you do choose to stay with her, know what is possible in the future. Always make yourself first! If a woman sees how much you value your own life and wants to be a part of that, you can choose to let her in. But don't supplicate yourself to someone who doesn't want you the way you want them.


--------------------


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: Cheated [Re: chevy66driver]
    #23529875 - 08/10/16 11:16 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

What he said ^

This is very likely not gonna last in the long run OP. I hate to be the bearer of bad news but I have A LOT of friends that range from their mid 30's up their mid 70's. Only one of them is still with the woman he was with at 17. It does happen, but it's EXTREMELY rare.

Even if you patch this thing up now, you're both gonna change A LOT in your 20's. That's why I'm saying don't sell yourself short. Your own self-respect and self love is far more important than the love you have for this woman.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #1

Re: Cheated [Re: Jokeshopbeard] * 1
    #23529935 - 08/10/16 11:49 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

I have been with cheaters and she really isnt thos type of girl she is just young thats why i still have some doubts to whether she will be with me or not. Other than all this corcumstancial stuff we are truly in love and she could be my soul mate even if we dont be together forever.

All i know is i love this girl alot and i want to make things work there are no logical reasons as to why thos cant work.

If it gets worse with cheating i know what ill havr to do but the love never even went away before this just some minor neglect she is 18 so thats a real factor in how she doesnt know what she wants thats why im here typing this but i really do think if she were thinking straight about thing and logical she would see that there is no reason to end this and we are perfectly fine together
Quote:

Jokeshopbeard said:
What he said ^

This is very likely not gonna last in the long run OP. I hate to be the bearer of bad news but I have A LOT of friends that range from their mid 30's up their mid 70's. Only one of them is still with the woman he was with at 17. It does happen, but it's EXTREMELY rare.

Even if you patch this thing up now, you're both gonna change A LOT in your 20's. That's why I'm saying don't sell yourself short. Your own self-respect and self love is far more important than the love you have for this woman.





I like you alot jokeshop for real you seem like a great person
We do have something deep i obviously cant get to deep here its all hard to explain

I will do anything for this girl and all the advice here has helped so has talking to family and i still want this thread to go on because i am still just a little lost i think i know what i have to do atleast for now i think its my best bet to try to carry on with the relationship while she truly figures things out for herself.
Partly this is because i have serious things i have neglected to do to show her we have any future together and i got to get to doing everything i told her i would do that i didnt.

Im not saying this is all my fault and that what she did is justified in any way but i do want to be with HER.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Anonymous #1

Re: Cheated [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #23529942 - 08/10/16 11:53 PM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Also i am willing to pm people more details if they are willing to respect my anomitity in this specific thread


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: Cheated [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #23530114 - 08/11/16 02:23 AM (7 years, 5 months ago)

Does she not have any 'serious things she's have neglected to do' in the two years you've been together?


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Jump to top Pages: 1 | 2 | 3 | Next >  [ show all ]

Kraken Kratom Shop: Red Vein Kratom


Similar ThreadsPosterViewsRepliesLast post
* 1st relationship advice.
( 1 2 3 all )
Anonymous 1,771 46 05/08/18 10:47 AM
by rag
* Missing someone uncontrollably
( 1 2 3 all )
Anonymous 562 50 03/24/15 10:38 PM
by Bikerfool
* Gay marriage
( 1 2 all )
basqueshaman 1,075 20 08/21/18 02:10 AM
by koraks
* Quick opinions?
( 1 2 all )
FruitOfLife 1,297 29 04/14/18 01:54 PM
by FruitOfLife

Extra information
You cannot start new topics / You cannot reply to topics
HTML is disabled / BBCode is enabled
Moderator: Middleman, Shroomism, automan, yogabunny, CookieCrumbs
468 topic views. 1 members, 2 guests and 2 web crawlers are browsing this forum.
[ Show Images Only | Sort by Score | Print Topic ]
Search this thread:

Copyright 1997-2024 Mind Media. Some rights reserved.

Generated in 0.026 seconds spending 0.006 seconds on 15 queries.