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ninenine
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Registered: 10/08/15
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Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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Constant ''God mode'' trips, how to manage?
#23509417 - 08/04/16 12:25 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Hi there,
I had my first full trip last November, I tried small doses after that every few months, after the second time (I've tripped 5 times in total on small doses) my trips keep going into this ''God'' mode - where life is revealed as a game, and there's this extreme lonliness and to ground myself I need to call my parents and tell them I love them ; also around this I can get suicidal thoughts.
My body can be amped with fear and anxiety and it's a terrifying experience most times, it's a very Soliphistic experience, and also the feeling that life has been one big game.
After much research I have seen that this is normal? I was wondering how to handle such states and how to ride those waves? The annoying thing is, when I'm in them I'm full of regret but when sober I want to jump back in. I've put in some quotes that I have found that describe what exactly I'm going through. I hope to gain some insight !
Threads similar on the experience: [url= https://www.reddit.com/r/Psychonaut/comments/4vnsc4/the_game_of_life/]https://www.reddit.com/r/Psychonaut/comments/4vnsc4/the_game_of_life/[/url]
https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/15929576/fpart/1/vc/1
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Strangely enough, knowing I was God made me want to kill myself. In order to be born again as someone or something that didn't know this so i could live in blissful ignorance. I would love to hear more about your trip if you have the time. To see what other aspects from it i could relate to because this is seemingly exactly what i experienced.
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When I've experienced this 'I've been everyone on this earth, and I am in fact the one and only god' feeling I've felt extremely lonely but at the same time an unconditional love for everybody on this planet.
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I perceived how everything was illusory; everyone/thing was a reflection of me, and I one of them. This was the moment when I realized "I" was "god," and let me tell you something...This was probably the most painful and agonizing experience of my entire life. The realization that nothing is real...and that you/I are literally all alone, creating this twisted drama, broke my spirit and will. It was perhaps the epitome of a solipsistic nightmare realized.
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Morel Guy
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Registered: 01/23/13
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Re: Constant ''God mode'' trips, how to manage? [Re: ninenine]
#23509443 - 08/04/16 12:34 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Does not sound like god mode but maybe super ego. God mode is perfect.
-------------------- "in sterquiliniis invenitur in stercore invenitur" In filth it will be found in dung it will be found
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Eclipse3130
Servant of the Fungi



Registered: 10/06/13
Posts: 6,221
Loc: PNW
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Re: Constant ''God mode'' trips, how to manage? [Re: Morel Guy]
#23509467 - 08/04/16 12:41 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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It seems like you are scared or discerned from the truth of which is being shown, I would wholeheartedly agree that this life is just an illusion or a game, we are the constructors of our own reality, thought becomes reality.
I guess that's a hard realization for some people to take it, this world is full of endless and infinite realities and dimensions we all accompany.
Maybe you have problems with being alone or "lonely" it's trying to teach you and show you how to love your self but you are restricting it because you either don't want to believe or like what's being shown to you, it becomes uncomfortable because you have expectations and are not leaving your mind open to the entire experience, there's no need to think, just spectate and be. Listen.
Calling everyone and telling them you love them is normal as you enter a vulnerable open state, it's just showing you what's really inside of you.
Loneliness and depression to navigate through you must be open to its further teachings and it will show you how to overcome.
No expectations
-------------------- "In The Material World One seeks retirement and grows Old In The Magical World One seeks Enlightenment and grows Wiser In The Miraculous World One seeks nothing and grows Lighter As we all tread the Homeward Path we will explore many Realms And one day... we will all Realize that all experiences are Simply Different ways in which The All-That Is Perceives Itself"
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ninenine
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Registered: 10/08/15
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Re: Constant ''God mode'' trips, how to manage? [Re: Eclipse3130]
#23509480 - 08/04/16 12:44 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Eclipse3130 said: It seems like you are scared or discerned from the truth of which is being shown, I would wholeheartedly agree that this life is just an illusion or a game, I guess that's a hard realization for some people to take it, this world is full of endless and infinite realities and dimensions we all accompany.
Maybe you have problems with being alone or "lonely" it's trying to teach you and show you how to love your self but you are restricting it because you either don't want to believe or like what's being shown to you, it becomes uncomfortable because you have expectations and are not leaving your mind open to the entire experience, there's no need to think, just spectate and be. Listen.
Calling everyone and telling them you love them is normal as you enter a vulnerable open state, it's just showing you what's really inside of you, loneliness and depression you must be open to it's further teachings and it will show you how to overcome.
No expectations
Hi there, I think you hit it on the nail. I think it's not accepting that it's just an endless game with many possibilities, I think another aspect is that it shatters my belief systems (which are based in the Abrahamic faiths) -
I think I need to ''walk'' through the experience in a zen way, not resisting or chasing but just sitting in it. It's a shame because I really want to continue tripping but if it keeps coming to this I might have to stop?
I think its' also painful that we have to walk this path alone (shrooms or not). I hope I can get past this, thank you for your reply.
How do I open and spectate? Should I recall on my meditation techniques?
Edited by ninenine (08/04/16 12:45 PM)
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Xingu
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Re: Constant ''God mode'' trips, how to manage? [Re: Morel Guy]
#23509502 - 08/04/16 12:51 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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An excerpt from something on Reddit that might help you:
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Will (mental) creations to be there, and it's there. Withdraw your energy and attention from your creations, and they fade away. Fight with creations, and they assume the adversary role. Make all creations subservient to you, and they will serve you. Become a slave to your creations, and you end up serving them. Make your domain a place of chaos, and your domain will try to destroy you. Make your domain a place of refuge, and your domain will comfort you. Make you domain exclusive and no one else will get in. Make you domain inclusive and allow others to become intimate with you.
I think you're giving too much energy to ideas that bring you significant discomfort. You're accepting them as fact because of an ideas resultant from a trip which can easily lack any credible truth. Not saying that truth doesn't bubble up during tripping, but simply that a lot of nonsense comes through also. It sounds like the real underlying realization was the feeling, not the idea, and that feeling you say is anxiety and loneliness. You need to connect more to supportive people that you appreciate, imo, and find ways to keep your mind more centered and calm.
Also, in some aspect, we are all a piece of the divine, and life is all a game of sorts. That truth doesn't have to be isolating and solipsitic, though, but I absolutely know where you're coming from when you say that, because I had a similar experience many years back.
The only way I ride out rough spots of trips is simple meditation. Paying attention to the root fear and anxiety and calmly breathing through it, and sitting in it, like you say, rather than engaging an unpleasant cognitive construct, or resisting the emotion. Tripping can generate some hugely enlightening, genuinely insightful, and fun ideas, but be wary of any ideas in life that are spawned in an anxious state, but especially when tripping and anxious. Engaging less than lucid and anxiety induced ideas when tripping is jumping down a rabbit hole. Best to just ignore the hole and walk on until you arrive at a centered and relaxed tripping state to try to develop any philosophical notions.
Take some time away from tripping and reflect on things. Figure out what the root of that anxiety and loneliness is, and let yourself grow from addressing it. It'll be an important step down the road of awareness, and any potential future psychedelic experiences will improve as a result.
Edited by Xingu (08/04/16 12:57 PM)
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Eclipse3130
Servant of the Fungi



Registered: 10/06/13
Posts: 6,221
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 3 hours, 58 minutes
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Re: Constant ''God mode'' trips, how to manage? [Re: ninenine]
#23509503 - 08/04/16 12:51 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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It can be painful at times, but when you accompany yourself with good hearts, goals and self love(treating yourself properly) it can be a fun and loving journey.
Your religious background further proves that this is exactly what is going on, religion is a conditioned mindset, it closes the mind into certain beliefs and ways of thinking. Mushrooms are the opposite, they show the real truth of our existence and the human mind, the world is really just an infinite ever changing jumble of realities within dimensions of energy and frequency patterns as crazy as that sounds the human mind is bound to endless openness, there really is an infinite amount of possibilities and perspectives one could have on any one thought or idea.
You got the point pretty quickly, as you must trust what you see and feel, your intuition.
Your plan sounds like a good one, next time you embark have an open mind, be fully open to what it wants to show you and help you overcome through universal and subconscious flow of thought.
You may not like what you find inside of you but I promise the mushrooms will show you in the most loving way, and allow you new perspectives on your internal problems.
Until then work on what was shown in your last experience!
Have a good one!
-------------------- "In The Material World One seeks retirement and grows Old In The Magical World One seeks Enlightenment and grows Wiser In The Miraculous World One seeks nothing and grows Lighter As we all tread the Homeward Path we will explore many Realms And one day... we will all Realize that all experiences are Simply Different ways in which The All-That Is Perceives Itself"
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ninenine
Stranger

Registered: 10/08/15
Posts: 15
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
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Re: Constant ''God mode'' trips, how to manage? [Re: Eclipse3130]
#23509512 - 08/04/16 12:56 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
Eclipse3130 said: It can be painful at times, but when you accompany yourself with good hearts, goals and self love(treating yourself properly) it can be a fun and loving journey.
Your religious background further proves that this is exactly what is going on, religion is a conditioned mindset, it closes the mind into certain beliefs and ways of thinking. Mushrooms are the opposite, they show the real truth of our existence and the human mind, the world is really just an infinite ever changing jumble of realities within dimensions of energy and frequency patterns as crazy as that sounds the human mind is bound to endless openness, there really is an infinite amount of possibilities and perspectives one could have on any one thought or idea.
You got the point pretty quickly, as you must trust what you see and feel, your intuition.
Your plan sounds like a good one, next time you embark have an open mind, be fully open to what it wants to show you and help you overcome through universal and subconscious flow of thought.
You may not like what you find inside of you but I promise the mushrooms will show you in the most loving way, and allow you new perspectives on your internal problems.
Have a good one!

Thank you, I'll keep this in mind when I try and trip tomorrow. It has been mind opening to see that there are multiple realities and outcomes. It doesn't sound crazy as that's exactly what I've been experiencing. Thanks for your time. With the fear there's always a surge of love for humanity coming out
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Eclipse3130
Servant of the Fungi



Registered: 10/06/13
Posts: 6,221
Loc: PNW
Last seen: 3 hours, 58 minutes
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Re: Constant ''God mode'' trips, how to manage? [Re: ninenine]
#23509519 - 08/04/16 12:59 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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You most likely are a sensitive person, maybe surround yourself in a proper setting in Nature, anxiety can be accompanied when not open to the new ideas, but also can have anxiety in the truth of the moment of realization, in the end it's best to just surrender, lay back and spectate your unbound mind. 
Please report back we'd love to hear how it went!
-------------------- "In The Material World One seeks retirement and grows Old In The Magical World One seeks Enlightenment and grows Wiser In The Miraculous World One seeks nothing and grows Lighter As we all tread the Homeward Path we will explore many Realms And one day... we will all Realize that all experiences are Simply Different ways in which The All-That Is Perceives Itself"
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ComebackKid
Multispore Enthusiast



Registered: 05/27/16
Posts: 3,951
Loc: ked in the trunk of a car
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Re: Constant ''God mode'' trips, how to manage? [Re: Eclipse3130]
#23511833 - 08/05/16 07:05 AM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Hey man you commented on my post about me being god. I mentioned that the first time I has this connection that I fell into a bad trip. I want to share with you this experience and hopefully you can relate somehow and it may help. It was very hard for me to get over it. Even hints of it carried on into other trips I've had.
When I was tripping with my friends the first time, I came to the aweful conclusion that I had died. Everything was too surreal to be real life. I wouldnt accept it so I created something that I could understand. Now this was where things went sour. Things people were saying to me seemed like they were mocking me. When someone laughed they were laughing at me. How stupid could I have been to think that this was all just a good time. I was dead. And I deserved it. I had led a shallow and selfish life. And now I was going to pay the ultimate price. I was going to hell. Yup, I should have listened to the bible. But I was a non believer and now I'm going to hell. For eternity. And my "friends" are the deamons that are going to lead me to the gates. My girlfriend kept telling me she loved me. And laughing. And trying to cheer me up. Which only made things worse. Everything she said was related to what I was thinking at the very time. She was mocking me. I realized I was not 100% committed in our relationship. I had no reason not to be either. Just cause I was a really shitty person I suppose. All of this went on for a looooong time. It was acid so felt like 3 nights long. I went for a walk and considered throwing myself infront of a truck to possibly end it. Im so happy I did not.
So basically what I learned was a bad trip for me all stems down to insecurity. Not loving myself completely with flaws and all. Acid makes you very vounerable. You have to remember that all you can do is try to be the best person you can possibly be.
Since then I have tripped with my girlfriend and had hints of the same trip with her. Where she was the devil and she was mocking me. The next time it happened I started to cry. But I decided that I wasnt dead yet so how could I be going to hell? She was telling me she loved me because she really did love me so much. Fuck why was I having such a hard time accepting that? Probably because I was so focused on how imperfect I was. Me and her had a good talk that night from an outside perspective on our relationship. I realized how important our relationship really was. And how our lives were the most important thing in the whole world. We had to do everything we could to make our lives pleasurable at all times. Our relationship has never been so strong. But it really goes to show that you can not love someone else if you dont fully love yourself.
Since then I still get hints of being mocked while tripping. But I have to remind myself that im making the negative connections up in my mind based on my personal insecurities. And most importantly I need to love myself and be myself at all times. Because no one is perfect. We accept others for not being perfect and we need to accept ourselves. All we can do is try our very hardest.
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Substrate surface conditions / Monotub prep and care
Look around you... Everything you see exists inside the mind. Consciousness, the awareness that is experiencing this mind, is peering in from outside the universe. Our individual experiences are all part of the universe's experience of itself
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SyzygisticSoul
Shroom Yawner


Registered: 04/19/16
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Re: Constant ''God mode'' trips, how to manage? [Re: ComebackKid]
#23511985 - 08/05/16 08:23 AM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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I love deep spiritual experiences. My favorite trips by far is when I experience Christ Consciousiness. It makes me feel so pure, absolutely and without question. In that state of consciousness, I have no need to question questions of purpose or existence because it puts everything into perfect perspective. It's a state that makes me feel all wise and all knowing. I call it my Higher Power/Light.
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Peyote Road
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Re: Constant ''God mode'' trips, how to manage? [Re: ninenine]
#23513123 - 08/05/16 02:52 PM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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Quote:
ninenine said:
Quote:
Eclipse3130 said: It seems like you are scared or discerned from the truth of which is being shown, I would wholeheartedly agree that this life is just an illusion or a game, I guess that's a hard realization for some people to take it, this world is full of endless and infinite realities and dimensions we all accompany.
Maybe you have problems with being alone or "lonely" it's trying to teach you and show you how to love your self but you are restricting it because you either don't want to believe or like what's being shown to you, it becomes uncomfortable because you have expectations and are not leaving your mind open to the entire experience, there's no need to think, just spectate and be. Listen.
Calling everyone and telling them you love them is normal as you enter a vulnerable open state, it's just showing you what's really inside of you, loneliness and depression you must be open to it's further teachings and it will show you how to overcome.
No expectations
Hi there, I think you hit it on the nail. I think it's not accepting that it's just an endless game with many possibilities, I think another aspect is that it shatters my belief systems (which are based in the Abrahamic faiths) -
I think I need to ''walk'' through the experience in a zen way, not resisting or chasing but just sitting in it. It's a shame because I really want to continue tripping but if it keeps coming to this I might have to stop?
I think its' also painful that we have to walk this path alone (shrooms or not). I hope I can get past this, thank you for your reply.
How do I open and spectate? Should I recall on my meditation techniques?
which Abahamic faiths? You might want to look into Gnostic Christianity and/or Kabbalah. These ideas about you being God and thought creating reality are not new to the Abrahamic faiths, but they are traditionally not given out to the average person and instead are reserved for "initiates". Remember Jesus said he taught the masses in parables but when he was alone with his deciples he expounded upon all things.
The mushrooms have initiated you into a new understanding of life and learning about the kabbalistic tree of life might help you integrate what you have learned with your pre-existing religious background.
-------------------- The path of the herbalist is to open ourselves to nature in an innocent and pure way. SHe in turn will open her bounty and reward us with many valuable secrets. May the earth bless you. - Michael Tierra
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