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Invisiblevandago
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Registered: 07/07/04
Posts: 20,917
Loc: .
Battling the storm I have created.
    #23478497 - 07/26/16 11:57 AM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Addiction can fuck your day up when you need your day non fucked with the most.


The last few years of drinking alone have really piled up.

My family gave me this house under the premise that I was to take over their mortgage, however, after being here two months, they waited til I was tied up with the courts to drop the bomb on me........"Ya we ahvet been paying the bills or taking the trash out in months."

So I ws squatting with my family then, who went and moved to greener pastures ( aka where they can free load and do whatever and have more space ) which is my step step whom I am not related to but mariiage mom's house. 

Now I am left in this house that I thought I was buying.

Only to be pushing a broom and cleaning it slowly over the year and half I have been hear alone.

I have collected all the trash and put it in the garage, but with fines and everything, I haven't been able to afford a hopper to get it all out.

Today I start house arrest.  Tomorrrow the trash hopper comes.  11 people have lived in this house prior to me moving back in. As an adult I needed a hand and asked if I could stay here and not only help myself but help them buy buying the house.  I gave them all a hand and now I am just manning up and doing what needs to be done for me because of them.


Really sad when your own blood doesn't tell you what's really goin on til it's too late.

Not only will I pay for this whole mess to be cleaned, put the work into cleaning it, and comply with the code they need me to keep it up to, but I won't damn any of them. 

I'm sure if karma is real I deserve this.  If karmas not real the earth deserves to be clean.  My step family may have been trashy and rude, but I'm meticulous and proper to my neighbors and they just think I'm a chip off the ol block.....but I don't have ties with that block they hate.


Tl;dr  Trying very hard to stay positive through the storm and venting


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InvisibleCrixalis
Wobble Master
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Registered: 11/13/15
Posts: 522
Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: vandago]
    #23478517 - 07/26/16 12:06 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

That is a weird predicament you find yourself

I can only imagine what condition the house was left in...

and you say there were 11 occupants before you even moved in. Yikes

I don't have any words of wisdom to mitigate ur situation however I can firmly state you're already on the right track through ur positive mindset.

What you mentioned about ur family, really struck home. You have my sympathy

At least you have a place to sleep at night, fuck it.


--------------------
Bring the right vibes. Express yourself. Be open. Be crazy. But spread your beautiful love light. Things are gonna get wonky. :heart:


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OnlineManianFHS
living in perverty
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Registered: 07/06/04
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Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: Crixalis]
    #23478548 - 07/26/16 12:17 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

So are you on the title? When does the transfer occur if not, because I wouldn't be paying on a mortgage to a title in someone else's name, especially if your relationship seems strained. That's weird.


--------------------
notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... "

ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."


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InvisibleRepertoire89
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Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: vandago]
    #23478550 - 07/26/16 12:18 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Were they hoarders or something?

That sucks man.



Not judging your inlaws or whatever, but I've known a few POS's who squat on other people's dimes and destroy their property. Can't bring myself past judging these individuals in the harshest light. Parasitical troglodytes.


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InvisibleAdden
I'm a teapot
Registered: 06/04/03
Posts: 39,201
Loc: Flag
Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: vandago] * 1
    #23478551 - 07/26/16 12:19 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Like I always tell you guys. We got a spare bed and a guest bedroom. If it all goes to shit, we can shack you up until you find work. I know it doesn't help any now just don't forget it's a standing offer.


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OfflinePsilosopherr
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Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: ManianFH]
    #23478553 - 07/26/16 12:20 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

is your entire family addicted to meth or something? Like really, what the hell.


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Invisibledemiu5
humans, lol
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Registered: 08/18/05
Posts: 43,948
Loc: the popcorn stadium Flag
Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: vandago]
    #23478755 - 07/26/16 01:30 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

vandago said:
Addiction can fuck your day up when you need your day non fucked with the most.


The last few years of drinking alone have really piled up.

My family gave me this house under the premise that I was to take over their mortgage, however, after being here two months, they waited til I was tied up with the courts to drop the bomb on me........"Ya we ahvet been paying the bills or taking the trash out in months."

So I ws squatting with my family then, who went and moved to greener pastures ( aka where they can free load and do whatever and have more space ) which is my step step whom I am not related to but mariiage mom's house. 

Now I am left in this house that I thought I was buying.

Only to be pushing a broom and cleaning it slowly over the year and half I have been hear alone.

I have collected all the trash and put it in the garage, but with fines and everything, I haven't been able to afford a hopper to get it all out.

Today I start house arrest.  Tomorrrow the trash hopper comes.  11 people have lived in this house prior to me moving back in. As an adult I needed a hand and asked if I could stay here and not only help myself but help them buy buying the house.  I gave them all a hand and now I am just manning up and doing what needs to be done for me because of them.


Really sad when your own blood doesn't tell you what's really goin on til it's too late.

Not only will I pay for this whole mess to be cleaned, put the work into cleaning it, and comply with the code they need me to keep it up to, but I won't damn any of them. 

I'm sure if karma is real I deserve this.  If karmas not real the earth deserves to be clean.  My step family may have been trashy and rude, but I'm meticulous and proper to my neighbors and they just think I'm a chip off the ol block.....but I don't have ties with that block they hate.


Tl;dr  Trying very hard to stay positive through the storm and venting






sucks dude.  karma is a myth, beyond the basic law of action ---> equal/opposite reaction



so was that your sister, or step-sister in that christmas pic you shared? :naughty:



if you weren't committed due to the house arrest, i'd say move out and let them default/lose everything.  get a neck-brace and keep your head up!


--------------------
channel your inner Larry David


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InvisibleAdden
I'm a teapot
Registered: 06/04/03
Posts: 39,201
Loc: Flag
Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: demiu5]
    #23478781 - 07/26/16 01:37 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

If only he never got mixed up with these girls.

:nonono:



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OfflineAnahata


Registered: 02/25/12
Posts: 2,399
Last seen: 3 days, 8 hours
Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: vandago]
    #23479006 - 07/26/16 02:41 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

When I first clicked on this I thought it was going to be about a video game or the like.
I like the story it has potential OP! A pic of the house can only help furthur the story. Maybe be people can give some tips or ideas:stoned:


--------------------


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Offlinemusiclover420
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Registered: 11/06/12
Posts: 19,563
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Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: Anahata]
    #23479041 - 07/26/16 02:54 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

I moved into a trashed house with my mom a few years back. Their was a truck bed in the back yard as well as big barrels of who knows what, trash everywhere strewn about and piled up in the garage. We lived there for a few years and cleaned it up entirely, added 2-3 big garden beds. We essentially de trashed the house and even improved it probably raising the property value. Well after a few years the landlord decided she wants to sell it so we had to move out :sad:

Anyways my point is careful you don't let strained family relations make you waste a ton of effort fixing up their mess.

Though that shows you have good character if you are willing to help them out like that even though you are not the closest.

I can relate to feeling stressed out all the time and all we can do is keep on trying to stay positive and improve things :cheers:


--------------------
Don't worry about me, I've got all that I need. And I'm singing my song to the sky

You know how it feels, With the breeze of the sun in your eyes. Not minding that time's passing by

I've got all and more, My smile, just as before. Is all that I carry with me

I talk to myself, I need nobody else. I'm lost and I'm mine, yes I'm free



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InvisibleMoonshoe
Blue Mantis
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Registered: 05/28/04
Posts: 27,202
Loc: Iceland
Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: vandago]
    #23479528 - 07/26/16 06:12 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

I can relate OP- my family had it all, until my father invited gambling into his life.

When the addiction bloomed it consumed everything - our family's home, our cars, our cabin, my college fund, their pensions, our inheritances, and our relationships as a family .

There was nothing I could do to help him.

When your family is in free fall it's ok to lend a helping hand, but don't let them pull you over the ledge with them.

Do what you can to help but protect yourself and your life. Set boundaries and limits . And know that you cant save anyone who doesn't want to save themselves.

Don't be afraid to say no and walk (or run) away if they are asking or taking too much.

Know what matters to you and protect it, even from those we love.

I don't know if any of that is helpful to you but it's what I had to learn.

Their was a silver lining - when my father sacked our entire life I lost all the sense of security that having a healthy family to fall back on gives you.

That sucked but it also forced me to realize I had to stand on my own feet and build and protect my own family.

I also , eventually, learned to Forgive him. Now we are closer than we ever were before - but I still can't ever trust or rely on him for anything ever again.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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Invisiblevandago
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Registered: 07/07/04
Posts: 20,917
Loc: .
Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: Moonshoe]
    #23479843 - 07/26/16 07:39 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

My family were extreme hoarders.  Never used meth or any hard drugs.

Just rude shitty people.  They had me living there for 3 months before they said they hadn't been paying on the mortgage for 3 months.


From what the health inspector saw, he said the place would be condemned if I hadn't been fixing it up just to be living comfortably.  The inside isn't bad at all......it was horrid.  But the months and months I have been in there plus working full time I have used scrub everything and removed all the trash my siblings boyfriends girlfriends and kids had left when they moved out, putting all of it in the garage ( which doesnt have a door ).

I had been planning on getting a hopper anyways to get all the shit out, but I hadn't had the money ( 300 bucks ) to put towards that.


I paid off all their utility bills to be abe to switch it over into my name, and if I hadn't cleaned everything that place would have gotten infested with horrid.  There was more mice and what not, but since I have been scrubbing and cleaning and living there, leaving food away from the counters, they started dispersing from the warm weather.


I haven't been paying the mortgage because fuck that shit.  The house is slowly being foreclosed on s I am just waiting for the bank to finally put it up for auction, which takes years.

It's just everything seems to crash at once.  I'll be finishing the cleaning tomorrow in between 2 12 hour shifts exhausted, but it has to be done.

I talked to my parents about it, and all they said was "thank you" no offer to help financially or physically.


I can't wait to be off probation, there's nothing for me here.


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Invisibledemiu5
humans, lol
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Registered: 08/18/05
Posts: 43,948
Loc: the popcorn stadium Flag
Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: vandago]
    #23479858 - 07/26/16 07:45 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

vandago said:
My family were extreme hoarders.  Never used meth or any hard drugs.




my brother, i'm helping to clean up a 20+ year old mess.  i know the feeling


Quote:

I can't wait to be off probation, there's nothing for me here.






i relate.  i'm struggling with my current place of residence.  trying to make life decisions, but i feel stuck


--------------------
channel your inner Larry David


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Invisiblevandago
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Registered: 07/07/04
Posts: 20,917
Loc: .
Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: demiu5]
    #23479912 - 07/26/16 07:57 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

The only thing that really sucks about this, is the bank will be evicting me due to foreclosure any week.

I've spent so much money and time on this damn place, and my parents literally robbed me in many ways.

Like when the bank initially started the foreclosure on the place they sent the paper work for my parents and resident to receive a settlement.  At this time it was just them my younger sister and I living there.  The paperwork was for an offer for them to leave the premises and get paid to do so.  If they got paid and agreed to not gut the house of the valuables ( deck, copper, water heater etc ) all the tenants received money.....one of which was me.

They got about 5k in total ( 1200 a tenant ) and they lied and said the bank didnt give them anything, but they left the receipts on the counter when they went.  I didn't even say anything to them.......fuck it.....


I'm sorry you have to be doing the same shit demius.  Battling law fuck ups, while catering to other peoples fuck ups is a hell of a burden.




This too shall pass.


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Invisibledemiu5
humans, lol
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Registered: 08/18/05
Posts: 43,948
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Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: vandago]
    #23479921 - 07/26/16 07:59 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

vandago said:
The only thing that really sucks about this, is the bank will be evicting me due to foreclosure any week.

I've spent so much money and time on this damn place, and my parents literally robbed me in many ways.

Like when the bank initially started the foreclosure on the place they sent the paper work for my parents and resident to receive a settlement.  At this time it was just them my younger sister and I living there.  The paperwork was for an offer for them to leave the premises and get paid to do so.  If they got paid and agreed to not gut the house of the valuables ( deck, copper, water heater etc ) all the tenants received money.....one of which was me.

They got about 5k in total ( 1200 a tenant ) and they lied and said the bank didnt give them anything, but they left the receipts on the counter when they went.  I didn't even say anything to them.......fuck it.....


I'm sorry you have to be doing the same shit demius.  Battling law fuck ups, while catering to other peoples fuck ups is a hell of a burden.




This too shall pass.





whoah, buddy, you didn't say anything about foreclosure in the first post!

did you know the house was being foreclosed upon?  has the bank offered you any sort of transfer of ownership?  do they already have a buyer?  there's a fuckton of questions to ask at this point


edit:  i've brought the latter fuck up on myself.  i've been pushing my mom for ~9 years to de-clutter her house.  we made some progress ~5 years ago, but she had a serious breakdown and stopped the process.  she is finally at the point of saying fuck it, largely because she JUST retired (early, not in the good way) and doesn't want to live here anymore.


--------------------
channel your inner Larry David


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Invisiblevandago
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Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: vandago]
    #23479963 - 07/26/16 08:11 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

I didn't know it was being foreclosed on until it was too late.  I had moved all my things in, the agreement was when they left I took over the mortgage.  Right before they left they had all this paper work for a settlement and were like "so uhhh yaaaaa"

If I had the money I could buy the house from the sheriff when the time finally comes they sell it, but I don't.  I'm just squatting paying all the utilities off at this point.  But if I hadn't been there and that filth piled up inside it would have gotten completely infested. 

I am very jaded at my family at this point.  It's a total shit show I'm biting my tongue on, and all the work I am doing doesnt really benefit me nearly as much as them, especially since they kept my portion of the settlement using me as a resident.  They had told me IF they got one ( which they did ) they would give me my portion.

My parents are pretty scummy.

The upside is free rent, but really with the amount of work and money I have invested into living here, I could be renting to own, or leasing a nice clean place.


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InvisibleAdden
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Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: demiu5]
    #23479966 - 07/26/16 08:12 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Sorry to hear about your mum. :sad:


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Invisibledemiu5
humans, lol
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Registered: 08/18/05
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Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: vandago]
    #23479994 - 07/26/16 08:18 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

vandago said:
I didn't know it was being foreclosed on until it was too late.  I had moved all my things in, the agreement was when they left I took over the mortgage.  Right before they left they had all this paper work for a settlement and were like "so uhhh yaaaaa"

If I had the money I could buy the house from the sheriff when the time finally comes they sell it, but I don't.  I'm just squatting paying all the utilities off at this point.  But if I hadn't been there and that filth piled up inside it would have gotten completely infested. 

I am very jaded at my family at this point.  It's a total shit show I'm biting my tongue on, and all the work I am doing doesnt really benefit me nearly as much as them, especially since they kept my portion of the settlement using me as a resident.  They had told me IF they got one ( which they did ) they would give me my portion.

My parents are pretty scummy.

The upside is free rent, but really with the amount of work and money I have invested into living here, I could be renting to own, or leasing a nice clean place.






fuck the sheriff.  talk to the bank.  see if they'll work something out.  it's probably going to cost them more to put the house on the market than it would be to work with you....if you want to ACTUALLY pick up the mortgage. 

fuck your family.  you're too vested.  as much as i love my family, and as willing as they are to help me, they are toxic.


so seriously, is that your sister, or step-sister?  why didn't she clue you in?  why isn't she still there?


--------------------
channel your inner Larry David


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Invisiblevandago
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Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: demiu5]
    #23480105 - 07/26/16 08:39 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Half sister, and she's only 14 in november.  She had no idea what was going on.


The fact my parents had me move all my shit in there was the fucked part.  Then my own fuck up was getting into legal trouble binding me to that residence unless I request a transfer, but with all the money dumped into lawyers and court fines ( 5k + ) that isn't an option anymore.

I'm at the point of saying just stay away from everyone.


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Offlinemusiclover420
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Re: Battling the storm I have created. [Re: demiu5] * 1
    #23480164 - 07/26/16 08:52 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

I don't know what to say Vandango :shocked: That is a seriously intense situation, sounds like your family fucked you over pretty hard. I hope things work out for you, it may be a small condolence but from the look of things your family will probably get whats they deserve for this. If they are that trashy they will no doubt end up in the same situation before long only you will know better.

Also if you can put that much effort into fixing up such a trashed house I imagine you will be fine in the long run :super:

Just stay positive and try to think of all your options and what would be best for you both short and long term.

What would happen if you have to move out while under house arrest? :confused: If it weren't for that I would say move to greener grasses.
:strokebeard:


--------------------
Don't worry about me, I've got all that I need. And I'm singing my song to the sky

You know how it feels, With the breeze of the sun in your eyes. Not minding that time's passing by

I've got all and more, My smile, just as before. Is all that I carry with me

I talk to myself, I need nobody else. I'm lost and I'm mine, yes I'm free



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