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Electric Wizard21
Master


Registered: 04/25/16
Posts: 905
Loc: Russia
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly?
#23471951 - 07/24/16 10:50 AM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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Hello men & women,
I have to help this person - who I won't name, they are family - I want to help them get through to being sober. Is there anything powerful that might work? I've been tempted to give them mushrooms to help but that might backfire because they would be annoyed I have them. They have said before they have a problem, so that's step one. I've witnessed them sober for a few weeks, but they always relapse. Please, if all else fails they will die without enjoying their life, and I know they don't want that deep down.
Thank you shroomery.
-------------------- I'm sick of all you hypocrites Holding me at bay And I don't need your sympathy To get me through the day Seasons change and so can I Hold on boy, no time to cry Untie these strings, I'm climbing down I won't let them push me away
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Morel Guy
Stranger


Registered: 01/23/13
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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Electric Wizard21]
#23471999 - 07/24/16 11:15 AM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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They have to want to be sober or maintain a healthy drinking habit. No drug is going to cure them of that except one. There is a drug that makes you sick or blocks the effects of alcohol. Mostly it takes a will and desire not to make a mess of your life.
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Electric Wizard21
Master


Registered: 04/25/16
Posts: 905
Loc: Russia
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Morel Guy]
#23472020 - 07/24/16 11:24 AM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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Strangely enough they said they were taking them recently, I haven't checked if they still take them but I doubt it. I guess people are beyond hope once past a certain point then, shame, life is worth the sober journey.
-------------------- I'm sick of all you hypocrites Holding me at bay And I don't need your sympathy To get me through the day Seasons change and so can I Hold on boy, no time to cry Untie these strings, I'm climbing down I won't let them push me away
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Dark_Star
train driver pervading a desktop


Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,859
Loc: Uranus
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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Electric Wizard21]
#23472066 - 07/24/16 11:37 AM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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They need to be ready to help themselves. Otherwise they won't stop. If they are ready, be there for them.
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Electric Wizard21
Master


Registered: 04/25/16
Posts: 905
Loc: Russia
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Dark_Star]
#23472094 - 07/24/16 11:43 AM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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If they admit they have a problem, then surely that's a starting point? Would praying help or is this something that cannot be affected?
I've been through the change from someone who drinks to someone who is sober and yes, it was strange but it's not impossible.
-------------------- I'm sick of all you hypocrites Holding me at bay And I don't need your sympathy To get me through the day Seasons change and so can I Hold on boy, no time to cry Untie these strings, I'm climbing down I won't let them push me away
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Dark_Star
train driver pervading a desktop


Registered: 08/20/04
Posts: 31,859
Loc: Uranus
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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Electric Wizard21]
#23472149 - 07/24/16 12:00 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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It's a starting point, but isn't indicative of a willingness or desire to get better. I admitted I had a problem years before I cleaned up. I mean I did try, and got small batches of clean time....but I always failed, and always spent much more time strung out than not. Each time I stopped it felt like this was it, but it wasn't....until it was. But that happened over a long period of time & took a lot of pain. Praying certainly won't hurt, but again; we get better when we're ready to, and not a moment sooner. Sucks. Addiction hurts more than the addict. It hurts everyone that cares about them.
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Electric Wizard21
Master


Registered: 04/25/16
Posts: 905
Loc: Russia
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Dark_Star]
#23472577 - 07/24/16 03:08 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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I'm glad to hear you made it eventually, yes addiction is a pain! It hurts me to see someone wasting life that I know they could be enjoying sober.
-------------------- I'm sick of all you hypocrites Holding me at bay And I don't need your sympathy To get me through the day Seasons change and so can I Hold on boy, no time to cry Untie these strings, I'm climbing down I won't let them push me away
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Starstepper
AI Brobot



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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Dark_Star]
#23475836 - 07/25/16 03:15 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Dark_Star said: They need to be ready to help themselves. Otherwise they won't stop. If they are ready, be there for them.
As true as it gets unfortunately.
AA is alive and strong for a reason. This person will probably need to go there just to make some sober friends and influences. Getting away from alcohol is hard because a lot of people are doing it even if it is responsibly. The temptation is there and if you are an alcoholic you will always justify "just one drink" in your own mind.
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Electric Wizard21
Master


Registered: 04/25/16
Posts: 905
Loc: Russia
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Starstepper]
#23478360 - 07/26/16 10:56 AM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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I spoke to them about these AA meetings but they say they did not like them. I would attend as well since I am now sober so I enjoy hearing about people's experiences however dark.
Once you clear alcohol from your system it's all psychological afterwards, like any addictive drug.
-------------------- I'm sick of all you hypocrites Holding me at bay And I don't need your sympathy To get me through the day Seasons change and so can I Hold on boy, no time to cry Untie these strings, I'm climbing down I won't let them push me away
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Morel Guy
Stranger


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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Electric Wizard21]
#23478714 - 07/26/16 01:19 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Electric Wizard21 said: I spoke to them about these AA meetings but they say they did not like them. I would attend as well since I am now sober so I enjoy hearing about people's experiences however dark.
Once you clear alcohol from your system it's all psychological afterwards, like any addictive drug.
4 days is about the hardest part because it's right about the end of the physical withdrawal. Seizures can occur up to 4 days after stopping.
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Thayendanegea
quiet walker



Registered: 02/20/12
Posts: 7,596
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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Electric Wizard21]
#23478785 - 07/26/16 01:38 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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Dark Star is spot on correct. Alcoholics will not stop until they want to. My best advice would be to approach them when they are most receptive....IE right after a particularly bad bender and they are feeling the guilt and remorse that accompanies it. Ask them if they are tired of this groundhog day reality they are living.Maybe provide them with a copy of "The 20 questions" that AA puts out and can be downloaded that is meant to determine if they are drinking alcoholically .AA also has several pamphlets that you can get at almost any meeting that helps people come to terms with themselves.
Making them aware that this really is a disease and that it is the only disease that tells us repeatedly that we don't have one. Once they have become a full on alcoholic...will power usually doesn't work because they probably have some level of withdrawal symptoms to contend with. I will never tell someone not to pray for others because I still don't know who's prayer got me to the point of confronting my disease.
Another thing....Don't recommend cutting back the amount they drink. More than likely, they have already tried this and failed miserably on more than one occasion. Complete abstinence from alcohol is a must.....Don't push this as "For your whole life " thing because that seems overwhelming...break it down to 24 hrs....just not today. I don't promise anybody that I won't drink tomorrow...just not today.
Lastly, be willing to understand that you may not be able to help them...Try as you may, they may not ever get sober. I, myself had a partner that I nearly married...but held off because she was alcoholic and would no stop...I am in recovery and she was starting to make me think about stopping my own sobriety. She had a great job as a lawyer working for the fed gov't. and worked out at the gym every day but by 7:00 every night she was incoherent drunk...I had to leave her and she is still drinking...That was 5 yrs. ago. I have been a sober member of AA for going on 18 yrs and I put that sobriety ahead of anything else in life.
There is a way up and a way out, but they have to want it. period.
-------------------- Look Deep Into Nature,and Then You Will Understand Everything Better. Albert Einstein
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Psychedelic Pupil
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Registered: 09/27/12
Posts: 744
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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Electric Wizard21]
#23478836 - 07/26/16 01:50 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Electric Wizard21 said: Once you clear alcohol from your system it's all psychological afterwards, like any addictive drug.
While this is technically true alcoholism is an insidious addiction because alcohol is legal and prevalent in our society. There's a lot that goes into a commitment to be sober and it often involves other people. It's best to tell friends and family that you're not going to drink and use them as a support system. One of the reasons stopping drinking can be so hard is often friends and even family won't make a commitment to stop drinking when you're around, even if it's just for a couple months to get you over the hump.
I've dealt with alcoholism in friends, family and myself and seen complete success and total failure. There's someone I know now who is trying to stop, and has stopped for periods of time over the last few years. They keep relapsing because their wife wants to party and keeps having all their drinking friends over. I'm not saying it's impossible to just make up your mind to stop and do it solo but all the support you can get helps!
-------------------- I'd like to think I'm smart enough to realize how much knowledge I don't have.
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RJ Tubs 202


Registered: 09/20/08
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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: Electric Wizard21]
#23486659 - 07/28/16 05:37 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Electric Wizard21 said:
Once you clear alcohol from your system it's all psychological afterwards, like any addictive drug.
After becoming sober, one has to deal with the emotions they've been running from.
Addiction is a way we hide from ourselves. Chemicals to a great job of covering up our suffering.
Of course chemicals cause suffering, but at least we are in total control of that suffering.
Show me an addict and I will show you a control freak.
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Electric Wizard21
Master


Registered: 04/25/16
Posts: 905
Loc: Russia
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Re: How can I help an alcoholic who relapses constantly? [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
#23488218 - 07/29/16 04:30 AM (7 years, 5 months ago) |
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It's so true, everytime I ask them about drinking and other things they immediately go for the drink; I have noticed it.
-------------------- I'm sick of all you hypocrites Holding me at bay And I don't need your sympathy To get me through the day Seasons change and so can I Hold on boy, no time to cry Untie these strings, I'm climbing down I won't let them push me away
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