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Sophistic Radiance
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Registered: 07/11/06
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Loc: Center of the Universe
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I have no doubt that this is all for real.
It should be duly noted that the part about digging a hole to piss and shit in is the same part that says you should kill gays and crossdressers. This is clearly the legacy of a very advanced civilization.
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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mapleleafmarijuana
Archaeotek Magos



Registered: 03/08/12
Posts: 9,063
Loc: Alberta, Canada
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As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I take a look at my life and realize there's nothin' left 'Cause I've been blasting and laughing so long, That even my mama thinks that my mind is gone But I ain't never crossed a man that didn't deserve it Me be treated like a punk you know that's unheard of You better watch how you're talking and where you're walking Or you and your homies might be lined in chalk I really hate to trip but I gotta loc As they croak, I see myself in the pistol smoke, fool I'm the kinda G the little homies wanna be like On my knees in the night saying prayers in the streetlight
Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Look at the situation they got me facin' I can't live a normal life, I was raised by the streets So I gotta be down with the hood team Too much television watching got me chasing dreams I'm an educated fool with money on my mind Got my 10 in my hand and a gleam in my eye I'm a loc'd out gangsta set trippin' banger And my homies is down so don't arouse my anger, fool Death ain't nothing but a heartbeat away, I'm living life, do or die, what can I say I'm 23 now, but will I live to see 24 The way things are going I don't know
Tell me why are we so blind to see That the ones we hurt are you and me
Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Power and the money, money and the power Minute after minute, hour after hour Everybody's running, but half of them ain't looking What's going on in the kitchen, but I don't know what's cookin' They say I gotta learn, but nobody's here to teach me If they can't understand it, how can they reach me I guess they can't, I guess they won't I guess they front, that's why I know my life is out of luck, fool
Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise Been spending most their lives, living in the gangsta's paradise Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise Keep spending most our lives, living in the gangsta's paradise
Tell me why are we so blind to see That the ones we hurt are you and me Tell me why are we so blind to see That the ones we hurt are you and me
From the book of Coolio
-------------------- Vinegar Tom stay black cocksucker, thats the most important thing - joey coco diaz Flesh is Weak. All Hail the Machine God!
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Sophistic Radiance
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Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
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Honestly though, the quotes from Ecclesiastes are kinda different from the rest, because that book has a cheeky and satirical sort of ironic feel to it. The refrain goes "Nothing is new under the sun." It's my favorite book of the Bible, I quote it all the time.
I like the Bible where it's poetic, but most of it is just really fucking gross pseudohistory and gross rules written by gross people for incrementally less gross people.
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
Edited by Sophistic Radiance (07/18/16 08:42 PM)
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Sophistic Radiance
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Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
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The passages of the New Testament that contraindicate practices which are currently definitive of mainstream Christianity rank up there too. Did you know that Jesus was opposed to oaths, group prayer and tax write-offs for charity? It's true.
Quote:
33Again, you have heard that it was said to the ancients, ‘Do not break your oath, but fulfill your vows to the Lord.’ 34But I tell you not to swear at all: either by heaven, for it is God’s throne; 35or by the earth, for it is His footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. 36Nor should you swear by your head, for you cannot make a single hair white or black. 37Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ Anything more comes from the evil one.
--Matthew 5
Quote:
1Be careful not to perform your righteous acts before men to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.
2So when you give to the needy, do not sound a trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be praised by men. Truly I tell you, they already have their reward. 3But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, 4so that your giving may be in secret. And your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.
5And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites. For they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. Truly I tell you, they already have their reward. 6But when you pray, go into your inner room, shut your door, and pray to your Father, who is unseen. And your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.
7And when you pray, do not babble on like pagans, for they think that by their many words they will be heard. 8Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.
--Matthew 6
Edited by Sophistic Radiance (07/18/16 09:13 PM)
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DustBunny


Registered: 08/20/14
Posts: 10,404
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Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said: Is this a joke or are you serious Moon?
Many people here do have some sort of faith/belief. That said, this thread is clearly mocking the bible.
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Edited by DustBunny (07/18/16 09:04 PM)
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Moonshoe
Blue Mantis


Registered: 05/28/04
Posts: 27,202
Loc: Iceland
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Wrong.
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Everything I post is fiction.
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Sophistic Radiance
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Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
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Are you suggesting that the Bible is not preeminently worthy of mockery?
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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Kush_Zombie
smug piece of shit



Registered: 10/22/14
Posts: 4,793
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Are you suggesting that he's suggesting that the Bible is not preeminently worthy of mockery?
-------------------- How to get started in bulk: Presto 23-Quart Pressure Cooker BOD's Simple as FUCK Still Air Box PastyWhyte's Easy Agar Tek Munchauzen's Cultivation Video Series How EvilMushroom666 Prepares His Grains (I use jars with Synthetic Filter Discs) What is G2G? (Grain-to-Grain) Damion5050's Coir Tek (I use 5.5 - 6 quarts of water instead of 4. Also ignore step 13 and ignore the monotub completely. The only purpose of this tek is to show you how to make a simple substrate. I also add gypsum to it but not necessary) Spitball's Monotub Tek (A liner isn't necessary but is useful) Use 6500k lights throughout the whole process. When you wake up, turn the light on. When you go to sleep turn the light off. It's as simple as that.
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Sophistic Radiance
Free sVs!



Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
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Clearly!
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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Kush_Zombie
smug piece of shit



Registered: 10/22/14
Posts: 4,793
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-------------------- How to get started in bulk: Presto 23-Quart Pressure Cooker BOD's Simple as FUCK Still Air Box PastyWhyte's Easy Agar Tek Munchauzen's Cultivation Video Series How EvilMushroom666 Prepares His Grains (I use jars with Synthetic Filter Discs) What is G2G? (Grain-to-Grain) Damion5050's Coir Tek (I use 5.5 - 6 quarts of water instead of 4. Also ignore step 13 and ignore the monotub completely. The only purpose of this tek is to show you how to make a simple substrate. I also add gypsum to it but not necessary) Spitball's Monotub Tek (A liner isn't necessary but is useful) Use 6500k lights throughout the whole process. When you wake up, turn the light on. When you go to sleep turn the light off. It's as simple as that.
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Apostle
Philanthropist



Registered: 12/12/09
Posts: 31,501
Loc: FL
Last seen: 1 year, 24 days
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Quote:
Sophistic Radiance said: the same part that says you should kill gays and crossdressers. This is clearly the legacy of a very advanced civilization.
Then i guess that would make tolerance the downfall of said civilization.
Seems legit so far.
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DustBunny


Registered: 08/20/14
Posts: 10,404
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Re: Pub Scripture [Re: Moonshoe] 1
#23454281 - 07/18/16 09:15 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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You may have the best chance of convincing people that these verses are so important to you, but I still don't think so.
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Moonshoe
Blue Mantis


Registered: 05/28/04
Posts: 27,202
Loc: Iceland
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In all honesty, I am deeply religious and sincerely Christian. I am baptized, I have indeed read the entire bible cover to cover, I pray every day, I attend Church, and I try to live a religious and spiritual life.
The verses in the OP make me laugh or smile, and that alone makes them among the best verses in the bible. It really is a hard read, and if I take some Gems out of it for humour or for wisdom, that is not mockery but the hard earned fruits of my labour.
I am absolutely sincere when I say that "Live happily with the woman you love all the meaningless days of your life" is my favorite verse in the bible, my motto in life and the purest, most beautiful wisdom I have ever read.
The bible is full of madness and obscenity, but Christians like me find value in it anyway. Sometimes that value is in a laugh or smile.
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Everything I post is fiction.
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Sophistic Radiance
Free sVs!



Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
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Re: Pub Scripture [Re: Apostle] 1
#23454292 - 07/18/16 09:19 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Apostle said:
Quote:
Sophistic Radiance said: the same part that says you should kill gays and crossdressers. This is clearly the legacy of a very advanced civilization.
Then i guess that would make tolerance the downfall of said civilization.
Seems legit so far.
What downfall? Christendom, or the greater Noahide or Abrahamic cult if it pleases you, represents the single largest and most powerful cultural sphere currently existing on Earth.
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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Apostle
Philanthropist



Registered: 12/12/09
Posts: 31,501
Loc: FL
Last seen: 1 year, 24 days
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I never said it was complete hence the "so far". As a catholic myself, i can see Christianity for the beacon of hope that it is and i don't argue that it is a powerful institution.
There is an evil brewing in the desert that seeks to undo all this progress though and i feel like our returning to our Faith is the only way we'll be able to defeat it.
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Sophistic Radiance
Free sVs!



Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
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Re: Pub Scripture [Re: Apostle] 1
#23454350 - 07/18/16 09:33 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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Holy crap. I honestly have no doubt that you truly believe every single one of the six absurd parts of what you just said.
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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Apostle
Philanthropist



Registered: 12/12/09
Posts: 31,501
Loc: FL
Last seen: 1 year, 24 days
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And i have no doubt that you actually believe the things you tell yourself about yourself.
Fortunately there's all sorts of people to encourage each of our respective "delusions".
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Sophistic Radiance
Free sVs!



Registered: 07/11/06
Posts: 43,135
Loc: Center of the Universe
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Re: Pub Scripture [Re: Apostle]
#23454364 - 07/18/16 09:39 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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Here's the difference between our "delusions": you want mine. I don't want yours.
-------------------- Enlil said: You really are the worst kind of person.
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Apostle
Philanthropist



Registered: 12/12/09
Posts: 31,501
Loc: FL
Last seen: 1 year, 24 days
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The power of Christ compels you!
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Kush_Zombie
smug piece of shit



Registered: 10/22/14
Posts: 4,793
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Re: Pub Scripture [Re: Apostle] 1
#23454379 - 07/18/16 09:43 PM (7 years, 6 months ago) |
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Quote:
Apostle said: I never said it was complete hence the "so far". As a catholic myself, i can see Christianity for the beacon of hope that it is and i don't argue that it is a powerful institution.
There is an evil brewing in the desert that seeks to undo all this progress though and i feel like our returning to our Faith is the only way we'll be able to defeat it.
-------------------- How to get started in bulk: Presto 23-Quart Pressure Cooker BOD's Simple as FUCK Still Air Box PastyWhyte's Easy Agar Tek Munchauzen's Cultivation Video Series How EvilMushroom666 Prepares His Grains (I use jars with Synthetic Filter Discs) What is G2G? (Grain-to-Grain) Damion5050's Coir Tek (I use 5.5 - 6 quarts of water instead of 4. Also ignore step 13 and ignore the monotub completely. The only purpose of this tek is to show you how to make a simple substrate. I also add gypsum to it but not necessary) Spitball's Monotub Tek (A liner isn't necessary but is useful) Use 6500k lights throughout the whole process. When you wake up, turn the light on. When you go to sleep turn the light off. It's as simple as that.
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