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Invisiblebasqueshaman
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Sometimes sex really fucked life up
    #23409178 - 07/04/16 02:36 AM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Hello once more from the Basque shaman,
I recently have had some crazy shit go down.  One of my closest friends for the past 9 years came out and said he wanted to be with me. I was shocked as he knows I'm completely heterosexual, though I could care less who's homosexuality so long as I'm not involved.  I never really seen it coming
We were chilling and talking like always and boom out comes him saying he wants my ass, freaked me the fuck out. So I had to say goodbye I'm sorry I cannot be what you want me to be.  I've got mixed feelings about this as I love him like a brother,  but if I just brushed it off it would eventually become toxic. On another note I did meet a really cool girl who believes I'm her soul mate, it's almost like looking into a mirror when I'm with her so I'm open to the possibility it could be.  I just had to vent


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OfflineRosen_Rot
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Re: Sometimes sex really fucked life up [Re: basqueshaman]
    #23409208 - 07/04/16 03:07 AM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

basqueshaman said:
I've got mixed feelings about this as I love him like a brother,  but if I just brushed it off it would eventually become toxic.




This is complete bullshit and just portrays your insecurities over someone else's sexuality. I have friends who are gays, come out for the first time and told me they were gay and really wanted to fuck me hard. I have a particular DnD friend who's gay and absolutely adores me, passes compliments, flat out told me he really wants my ass....etc

I did not brush it off but made it particularly clear to him, ONCE, that I am heterosexual, I like girl's asses too much and if he caresses me in a way that I think is inappropriate I will end the friendship. I don't mind the hugging, pecks on the cheek or whatever else he does as long as it's not sexual since I am not appreciative in that way. I made sure I was assertive, clear and honest because I didn't want to hurt his feelings and also I valued our friendship considering he was there for me when I was going through a rough break up a couple of years back

We have been friends for years now, he tells me about his boyfriends/sexual escapades and I help to guide him in his hour of needs and vice versa, ergo, a really good chump

Quote:

On another note I did meet a really cool girl who believes I'm her soul mate, it's almost like looking into a mirror when I'm with her so I'm open to the possibility it could be.  I just had to vent




I'm going to assume this girl is crazy :lol: and you're flat out blown away by infatuation and wishful thinking


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Edited by Rosen_Rot (07/04/16 03:10 AM)


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Invisiblebasqueshaman
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Re: Sometimes sex really fucked life up [Re: Rosen_Rot]
    #23409228 - 07/04/16 03:28 AM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Wow dude your kinda bitchy, I said he already knew I'm straight, no confusion there. Not every one is meant to be in your permanently, like I said I can't be with him how he wants. I didn't include the fact that after I rejected him I was told I was no longer welcome around him.
As far as the girl being crazy sure ths t could be true, I'm documented as being psychotic. Eh at least I'm honest


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OfflineRosen_Rot
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Re: Sometimes sex really fucked life up [Re: basqueshaman] * 1
    #23409242 - 07/04/16 03:39 AM (7 years, 6 months ago)

I didn't mean to be bitchy but from what I read it sounded like you dumped your friend cause you assumed he was toxic for simply saying he likes you in that way. You did not mention that you were no longer welcome after rejecting him :lol: I'm sorry if it sounded like I was attacking, I wasn't :sun:

If he doesn't want to be your friend simply because you don't swing that way than it kinda says more about his values than it does to yours and probably a good thing he left :shineon: chillax


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Invisiblebasqueshaman
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Registered: 04/01/11
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Re: Sometimes sex really fucked life up [Re: Rosen_Rot]
    #23409266 - 07/04/16 04:08 AM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Yeah but I'm still kinda sad about loosing a friend I was close to for nearly a decade.  No worries you're a decent person from the post I've read from you


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OfflineRosen_Rot
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Re: Sometimes sex really fucked life up [Re: basqueshaman]
    #23409269 - 07/04/16 04:12 AM (7 years, 6 months ago)

You can check my ratings too, they are pretty decent :laugh2:

Meh it's alright :hug: I've had best friends abandon me randomly and some of them stabbed in the back. I guess the moral of this story is that he did not see you in the same way you saw him, he did not value the friendship, he only valued it until he couldn't get what he wanted and left at the first interval. Which sucks. It happens and IME, I never got any closure, I never found out why they did it to me, people just up and leave :shrug:


--------------------
:sporedrop:"The internet has one rule; use or be used" - Bjeldiablo :sporedrop:
''there is no loneliness, only moments where contentment is fleeting''

SBJs "The Basics"
3iRiS9 "Cirque du freak"
B+ BONANZA

   


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Invisiblebasqueshaman
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Registered: 04/01/11
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Re: Sometimes sex really fucked life up [Re: Rosen_Rot]
    #23410115 - 07/04/16 11:50 AM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Well I'm glad someone understands


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OfflineTheMovement
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Re: Sometimes sex really fucked life up [Re: basqueshaman]
    #23430739 - 07/10/16 10:45 PM (7 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

basqueshaman said:
Yeah but I'm still kinda sad about loosing a friend I was close to for nearly a decade.  No worries you're a decent person from the post I've read from you



You don't have to lose him.  You could get over your homoerotic insecurity and he could get over his lust for you.  You have both made your desires/intentions clear, I don't see why an unrequited attraction should be a reason for ending a 10 year relationship.

Perhaps something you said in the moment was overly harsh or he was overly aggressive in pursuing you, idk.  Whatever happened, you have a close bond with each other and should each communicate your inherent (platonic) love for one another and work through this.


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