|
Anonymous #1
|
Drawing a total blank on life
#23372594 - 06/23/16 06:39 AM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
I see no reason to really leave my bed anymore. I've tried to get better work that I'm more suited for, no dice. I've tried focusing on my interests, I barely have interests. I tried reading some neuroscience stuff recently to learn, and totally got bored with it. Was working on some electronics and coding stuff, but without the parts and knowledge I've grown bored with it. Why would I go back to school without knowing what I like, and have no motivation? What's the point of trying to meet new people or make plans with friends? Everyone's so flakey. Not only that, the friends I've made in the past talk behind my back but wont communicate the issues to me, leaving me to learn about things through the grapevine. Every single time I try to get anywhere, I end up going back to where I was in the beginning. I have no health care, can't afford it. Can't keep a job either. Can't sleep at reasonable hours or for very long, but that's not a part of why I can't keep a job. I'm always on time.
I'm so tired.
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #1] 2
#23372622 - 06/23/16 06:54 AM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
I really wanna help you on this man, cause I know the feeling. Thing is, you gotta get out what caused you to be this way in the first place. Either with yourself, with a journal, with a therapist, or with us. It's pointless focusing up the symptom unless you know the cause.
So how about it? Think you can dig into those memory banks and lay it out for us what brought this feeling about? If not for us, then for you?
I gotta draw up some kinda timeline for my therapist for next Tuesday. Been with her almost 11 months and we're getting deep. The trauma of childhood which once seemed such a distant and insignificant memory turns out to be the thing that shapes the man I am now the most.
Share if you can brother, but go at it no matter what; try and gain some perspective.
Don't look for peace. Don't look for any other state than the one you are in now; otherwise, you will set up inner conflict and unconscious resistance. Forgive yourself for not being at peace. The moment you completely accept your non-peace, your non-peace becomes transmuted into peace. Anything you accept fully will get you there, will take you into peace. This is the miracle of surrender. --Eckhart Tolle
He who is educated by dread [anxiety] is educated by possibility.. When such a person, therefore, goes out from the school of possibility, and knows more thoroughly than a child knows the alphabet that he demands of life absolutely nothing, and that terror, perdition, annihilation dwell next door to every man, and has learned the profitable lesson that every dread which alarms may the next instant become a fact, he will interpret reality differently.. --Kierkegaard
People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that's bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they're afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they're wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It's all in how you carry it. That's what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you're letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain. --Jim morrison
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
McNel


Registered: 09/03/10
Posts: 311
Last seen: 16 days, 4 hours
|
|
Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said: I really wanna help you on this man, cause I know the feeling. Thing is, you gotta get out what caused you to be this way in the first place. Either with yourself, with a journal, with a therapist, or with us. It's pointless focusing up the symptom unless you know the cause.
So how about it? Think you can dig into those memory banks and lay it out for us what brought this feeling about? If not for us, then for you?
I gotta draw up some kinda timeline for my therapist for next Tuesday. Been with her almost 11 months and we're getting deep. The trauma of childhood which once seemed such a distant and insignificant memory turns out to be the thing that shapes the man I am now the most.
Share if you can brother, but go at it no matter what; try and gain some perspective.
Don't look for peace. Don't look for any other state than the one you are in now; otherwise, you will set up inner conflict and unconscious resistance. Forgive yourself for not being at peace. The moment you completely accept your non-peace, your non-peace becomes transmuted into peace. Anything you accept fully will get you there, will take you into peace. This is the miracle of surrender. --Eckhart Tolle
He who is educated by dread [anxiety] is educated by possibility.. When such a person, therefore, goes out from the school of possibility, and knows more thoroughly than a child knows the alphabet that he demands of life absolutely nothing, and that terror, perdition, annihilation dwell next door to every man, and has learned the profitable lesson that every dread which alarms may the next instant become a fact, he will interpret reality differently.. --Kierkegaard
People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that's bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they're afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they're wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It's all in how you carry it. That's what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you're letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain. --Jim morrison
This is such a great post man, thanks!
Unfortunately I can't contribute much to OP's issue as I'm kinda going through something similar at the moment, but these quotes are blowing my mind right now.
Thanks again
Edited by McNel (06/23/16 08:02 AM)
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: McNel]
#23374011 - 06/23/16 02:36 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
You're welcome brother.
Try this on of for size, this was said nearly 2000 years ago but applies just as much today:
We hate gladiators if they are keen to save their life by any means; we favour them if they openly show contempt for it. You must realize that the same thing applies to us: for often the cause of dying is the fear of it. Dame Fortune, who makes sport with us, says 'Why should I preserve you, base and fearful creature? You will only receive more severe wounds and stabs as you don't know how to offer your throat. But you will both live longer and die more easily, since you receive the blade bravely, without withdrawing your neck and putting your hands in the way. He who fears death will never do anything worthy of a living man. But he who knows that this was the condition laid down for him at the moment of his conception, will live on those therms, and at the same time he will guarantee with a similar strength of mind that no events take him by surprise. For by foreseeing anything that can happen as though it will happen he will soften the onslaught of all his troubles, which present no surprises to those who are ready and waiting fo them, but fall heavily on those who are careless in the expectation that all will be well. --Seneca the younger
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
Anonymous #1
|
|
Your quotes aren't helpful at all, dude. I just don't see the point in bothering with anything anymore.
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23374521 - 06/23/16 05:34 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
Well, maybe not to you. At least they were to McNel.
I'm willing to do everything in my power to help you, and have asked you some very pertinent questions which you ignored in favour of telling me only that in responding to your request all I have been is unhelpful, without giving a shred of thanks for the time and effort I put in.
Make some effort or drown in your sorrows; it's your life, and I'm not invested in the outcome. I've got enough of my own problems to deal with. I will help if asked though.
So if you want any more input from me then show a little gratitude will ya? Just because you're feeling down it's no reason to act like an ungrateful prick.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
Anonymous #1
|
|
Yeah, I don't think I care for your help. See your pm's, but I'm not about to engage in some sort of psychotherapy session about my life in which you are not qualified to participate, especially with that last response. I'm respectfully asking you to leave the thread.
Seriously dude, this place is here to help people, not get your panties in a twist because someone didn't give you praise for a response - no offense... If you're going to act like that here, you shouldn't be allowed to moderate this place imo
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23374560 - 06/23/16 05:44 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
And I'm respectfully declining. This forum is not just about you, and you have no ownership over any thread you start.
Quote:
McNel said: This is such a great post man, thanks!
Unfortunately I can't contribute much to OP's issue as I'm kinda going through something similar at the moment, but these quotes are blowing my mind right now.
Thanks again
As you can clearly see above, my post helped another member immensely. If you don't want people to participate in this thread say the word and I'll lock and move it.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
Anonymous #1
|
|
Let me put this more bluntly for you then
Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said:
Make some effort or drown in your sorrows; it's your life, and I'm not invested in the outcome. I've got enough of my own problems to deal with. I will help if asked though.
So if you want any more input from me then show a little gratitude will ya? Just because you're feeling down it's no reason to act like an ungrateful prick.
I'm not asking for your help, go focus on your own problems. Jeez man, and I'm the prick here? Fuck outta here with that shit.
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #1] 1
#23374583 - 06/23/16 05:49 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
OK, but if discussion develops in this thread I will participate if I see fit. Not for you, but for the community.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
sudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,812
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23374602 - 06/23/16 05:54 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
Eat more carbs, like 3000 calories a day of rice n pasta or whatever.
Go to bed earlier, change up your sleep pattern with medications.
Treat your body like a pet, if it's bored, feed and train it.
Don't take the good or bad for granted, appreciate that you get to experience anything before you die and never have an experience again.
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: sudly]
#23374670 - 06/23/16 06:14 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Anonymous said: Why would I go back to school without knowing what I like, and have no motivation? What's the point of trying to meet new people or make plans with friends?
Quote:
Anonymous said: I'm not asking for your help
You did ask for help, you just don't like what I have to say.
Quote:
sudly said: Eat more carbs, like 3000 calories a day of rice n pasta or whatever.
Go to bed earlier, change up your sleep pattern with medications.
Treat your body like a pet, if it's bored, feed and train it.
This is good advice; 50% (clean) carbs on your macro's is good for energy & motivation. Multi-vitamins + SAMe are also very good.
Exercise is king, along with meditation.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
Anonymous #1
|
|
Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said: OK, but if discussion develops in this thread I will participate if I see fit. Not for you, but for the community.
Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said:
Quote:
Anonymous said: Why would I go back to school without knowing what I like, and have no motivation? What's the point of trying to meet new people or make plans with friends?
Quote:
Anonymous said: I'm not asking for your help
You did ask for help, you just don't like what I have to say.
No, I didn't ask for your help specifically, I'd have also been way more open to a discussion with you had you not just gotten so ass hurt about what I said and jumped to responses like "you're a prick". I was looking for real responses from people, not quotations as they just seemed so blank and disconnected. I didn't mean to offend you with that response, but YOU took it that way. The latter part "I just don't feel like bothering with anything anymore" was more of a comment on how i've been feeling about a lot of things lately, not really directed at your posts. You even said, If you want my input, show more gratitude, and when I didn't after being called a prick, you decided you were going to continue on... leading me to believe you are only continuing to post here to stick it to me or whatever, which is even more detrimental to anything you have to say in the future considering your intentions aren't really to help someone but rather get praise for whatever you post.
Putting aside your own ego will help you come across in a more caring tone when trying to help people, and you can't expect everyone to just be completely open to everything you say, especially when psychologically they feel like they are drowning and being consumed by life.
|
Anonymous #1
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23374743 - 06/23/16 06:35 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
I'm re-evaluating my OP, and the obvious solution to the problem would be to go see a therapist that can treat the psychological problems and disorders I've got, major depression ADHD and Autism Spectrum, but that's unobtainable to me at the moment as I have no way of paying for treatment being unable to keep a steady job as a result from the psychological problems, and having no real steady income besides the side work I do. It is a fucking shitty loop, and i'm really sick from (not of) dealing with it all. Both problems feed each other.
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23374748 - 06/23/16 06:36 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
What you are neglecting to understand is that I am not posting solely for you. Many people read these threads, and are helped by them, not just OP. The hard evidence of this fact is above.
I called you out for your rudeness because you made zero mention of the fact that, before the quotes, I tried sincerely to help, and you ignored it all. I am not offended. I just say it like I see it. Your response was ungrateful.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23374755 - 06/23/16 06:37 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Anonymous said: I'm re-evaluating my OP, and the obvious solution to the problem would be to go see a therapist that can treat the psychological problems and disorders I've got
What's your exercise and diet regime like?
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
Anonymous #1
|
|
Your subsequent responses were arrogant, and unnecessary.
Going back to the post that originally set you off -
Quote:
Your quotes aren't helpful at all, dude. I just don't see the point in bothering with anything anymore.
I wouldn't even know where to begin with expounding upon this anyway, besides what I've already tried to clarify on the former sentence...
You WERE offended, which is why you pointed out that you felt I was being "an ungrateful prick". Own up to it.
Quote:
Jokeshopbeard said:
Quote:
Anonymous said: I'm re-evaluating my OP, and the obvious solution to the problem would be to go see a therapist that can treat the psychological problems and disorders I've got
What's your exercise and diet regime like?
I get excercise every other day, I do certain exercises almost every day. I eat fairly well, I don't eat a ton of empty carbs and try to get decent meats and veggies in as much as possible. Even when I go long periods of time with a pristine exercise regimen, I still end up with thoughts of almost every day. Some periods of time are just worse than others.
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23374818 - 06/23/16 06:54 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
How about supplements man, multi-vitamins, SAMe?
Also, do you meditate?
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
Anonymous #1
|
|
SAMe may have helped for a short while, I ran out and it's incredibly expensive. I'm unsure if it was placebo or not, but I was taking 400mg daily for two weeks while I had it. L-theanine helps ease my mood disruptions, but it's not a cure all.
I meditate frequently. If I didn't, I'm sure things would be worse.
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23374852 - 06/23/16 07:04 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
Mmmmm. SAMe has been a massive help to me, but I agree, it is very expensive. So is therapy, been at that 11 months now and spent almost £2000. It helps, but it's a very slow process IME.
Have you ever been on SSRI's/SNRI's?
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
Anonymous #1
|
|
There's a clearnet legal vendor that sells tons of legal supplements in large amounts at high quality for cheaper than any store, it's still expensive though.
My life started to crumble when I cold turkey'd several big-time medications, some of which I now want access to being older and having a better picture of myself. Prozac has drawbacks, as does risperidone, the latter being something I don't want to continue. Amphetamines and health insurance would be most beneficial to me to get me through college and all, but i need government assistance pretty bad.
One of the best things I've found is experiencing new places and events, I think it might have something to do with triggering a sense of novelty which helps neurogenesis by nature - something that is implicated as lacking in patients with depression.
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #1]
#23375172 - 06/23/16 08:40 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
Not surprised the crumble started when you cold turkey'd meds. I've seen what that does; you have to titrate that pharma stuff so slowly.
Why not go back on those meds for a bit?
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
Anonymous #2
|
|
Your posts were helpful to me also ..btw jokes I always see your posts and they are always relevant and helpful.. thanks for routinely posting in the forums
|
Jokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system
|
Re: Drawing a total blank on life [Re: Anonymous #2]
#23375310 - 06/23/16 09:34 PM (7 years, 7 months ago) |
|
|
Thanks for saying so man, you're most welcome. I'll do anything within my power to make these forums as safe, helpful, warm, comforting, compassionate and full of love as I can.
-------------------- Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not. --Jac O'keeffe
|
|