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Offlineskoomaguitarist
pathetique

Registered: 12/20/03
Posts: 201
Loc: superfailure
Last seen: 12 years, 9 months
superfailure
    #2329232 - 02/13/04 02:38 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

some lyrics i wrote:

with my dead eyes,
i've seen so many things
i've seen love, and the pain that it brings
seen sorrow, felt guilt
known fear, and i'm watching the crumbling of all that i've built

with my deaf ears,
i've heard so many things
i've heard lies, and the sorrow they bring
heard chaos, heard pain
filling me up with the pouring rain
and all that i know is dying away

with my dead mind,
i've felt so many things
felt joy, compassion, lust and greed
felt heartbreak, breathed sorrow
spat hatred, calmly killing tomorrow

each night as the moon crosses the sky
i live my life hoping to die
with my dead eyes, and my deaf ears
my dead mind and nameless fears
my life is a failure, miserably complete
i am just what's left of me

struggling to admit defeat
i accept my destiny
killing the last part of me
there is superfailure inside you see


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OfflineOook
Oook!

Registered: 08/19/03
Posts: 533
Loc: England
Last seen: 12 years, 2 months
Re: superfailure [Re: skoomaguitarist]
    #2329524 - 02/13/04 05:45 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

I like these lyrics, quite sort of dark but in a well thought out way. I could imagine this more as a poem than I song, but I suppose it's all down to how it's presented at the end of the day.


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Offlineskoomaguitarist
pathetique

Registered: 12/20/03
Posts: 201
Loc: superfailure
Last seen: 12 years, 9 months
Re: superfailure [Re: Oook]
    #2333600 - 02/14/04 06:32 AM (12 years, 9 months ago)

Wo else thinks that this would work better as a poem... anyone?
I lso wonder what anyone thinks about any of my posts in this forum period...
I never seem to get any feedback... am I doing something wrong??


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